The Reunion of Jacob and Esau - Weekend Torah Teaching

On today's episode of Timeless Wisdom.

Jacob pays dearly for his mistake in spoiling Joseph and in showing that he is the favorite son. He pays a terrible price in the antipathy of the brothers toward his favorite child, his other children. And nothing hurts a parent more than when their children hate each other or don't, don't, don't even, or merely don't love each other.

That's coming up on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager.

One Nation Under God. Here's Franklin Graham.

I'm inviting you to join with us and to pray for America. Pray that we as individuals and as a nation turn to the God of our fathers, the God of the Bible.

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Welcome to Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Hear thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, and classic radio programs. And to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles, go to DennisPrager.com.

We're in Genesis 33. Jacob has been transformed Through his, through his battle with this mysterious assailant, he is now Israel. He has both fought or striven with God and man and prevailed, and now the new man is ready to have a reunion with his brother. Looking up, Jacob saw Esau coming, accompanied by 400 men. The obvious implication of that is that Jacob would worry. Does, does Esau want to kill him? How, how angry is is Esau still. He divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two maids, putting the maids and their children first, Leah and her children next, and Rachel and Joseph last. Now, you can ask why that division. And you have to answer that it's probably in order of his love, which doesn't necessarily reflect well. And it always has to be noted that when the patriarchs or any other great figure in the Torah is depicted, the Torah does nothing to embellish them, nothing. So their greatness comes through, their struggles come through, and their weaknesses come through. Now there may be other reasons why he put Rachel and Joseph last, but it seems that the most logical read is that should there be a problem, they would be the last to be affected. Perhaps they could run away. Perhaps the order was simply, uh, by, by numbers. The greatest numbers in the front, then the next, and then finally just Rachel and Joseph. But after all, some, some order had to be worked out. If he had put— he couldn't flip a coin, and he if he put Rachel and Joseph in the front, then we would probably infer something from that. So it's hard to blame him, but at the same time, it's hard to imagine that this was not a deliberate order, that he had put them in order to perhaps most protect his treasured Rachel and Joseph. He himself went on ahead So he didn't stay back. He went on ahead and bowed low to the ground 7 times until he was near his brother. Now, bowing low to the ground 7 times is an act of tremendous honor, almost a humbling of the person who does the bowing. As Sarna notes, the Hebrew verb denotes the full-length proneness of the body as a symbol of submission to a superior authority. The practice is illustrated by the royal correspondence from Tell el-Amarna in which the conventional formula of the vassal writing to Pharaoh is 7 times and 7 times I fall at the feet of the king, my lord. That is both prone and supine position. So it is, it's clear that Jacob doesn't want to get hurt by Esau. He is already the victor. He has won the birthright blessings. He can afford to now say, look, I, I regard you still as my older brother. I regard you as a great man. So again, the, the brilliance of this entire chapter is that you can read it constantly as pro-positive and constantly as negative, constantly as ambiguous, because that's the way human life is. It's filled with ambiguity. But you can also say he has now learned, that Jacob has learned. He is this new man. He is now Israel. And he wants to say, you know what, I did hurt you, and I want to honor you in any way I can, and bows down far more than normally a brother would to another. In fact, he didn't have to bow down once, let alone 7 times. So it's clear that he is sending a profound message to Esau, his older brother, in a combination of I'm sorry, I, and I honor you. After all, Esau had been humiliated. He had been tricked by his own brother, by his mother. And unintentionally by his father. And so that's humiliating, and he was humiliated, and he screamed out and cried when he was tricked. So here is Jacob trying to undo that humiliation by humbling himself, bowing down 7 times as if to royalty. Esau, verse 4, Esau ran to greet him. He embraced him, and falling on his neck, he kissed him, and they wept. And now the question is, how do you explain Esau's conduct? He runs to the brother that had tricked him. That whom he wanted to kill and now runs to greet him, hugs him, falls on his neck and kisses him. Again, what, what is involved here? Is it sincere? Is it to set him up for being hurt eventually? I believe it's sincere. However, there is a tremendous amount of later Jewish rabbinic tradition that holds that it was not sincere and in fact fell on his neck. I don't happen to buy this, I just want to make that clear. But that he fell on his neck and wanted to bite it and kill him by sucking out his blood, but that it turned to marble and he couldn't bite it. That's actually part of the Jewish book of legends of the, the Aggadot. And again, I think that in that case the rabbis were too severe on Esau. If he wanted to kill Jacob, it wouldn't have been by biting his neck. He just would have had some of his 400 men just, you know, kill him in some normal manner, one presumes.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

One Nation Under God. Here's Franklin Graham.

I'm inviting you to join with us and to pray for America Pray that we as individuals and as a nation turn to the God of our fathers, the God of the Bible.

As we approach America's 250th, join Franklin in praying for our nation every day. A new prayer is posted daily at OneNationUnderGod.com. Invite your friends and family to pray too. OneNationUnderGod.com.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's Timeless Wisdom.

And they wept, it says. They wept. And I I believe that both their tears were sincere. And maybe I just give the benefit of the doubt too often, but I believe that they were, were sincere. On the other hand, Benno Jacob, who was one of the great, great commentators on Genesis, says that he thinks that it's suspect because he shows all the other times in Genesis and in one, and also in Exodus 1, one example of where you have analogous situations and there isn't quite that much. For example, Jacob and Rachel: And Jacob kissed Rachel and lifted up his voice and wept. Joseph and Benjamin, chapter 45 later: And Joseph fell on the neck of Benjamin his brother and wept. Jacob and Joseph: Chapter 46. And Joseph presented himself to him and fell on his neck and wept on his neck for a good while. By the way, I think that all of this falling on the neck proves that the later rabbinic belief that he wanted to suck out his blood or bite him in the neck is not acceptable, because that is the common way of describing sincere hugs— falling on the neck. So that to me is further proof from the Torah text itself that he didn't mean him ill by falling on his neck. Moses and Aaron: "And Aaron went and met him and kissed him." Now with Ben O'Jacob says, now contrast the passage here: "And Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him and wept." None of the other encounters are accompanied by such a display of effusiveness. And Ben O'Jacob suggests that this description of Esau's running, embracing, falling, kissing, and weeping is suspect. The problem with the suspect is, for what? What is Esau— what's his ulterior motive? Why? What was he really aiming to do? It's true, it is more effusive than any other embrace in the Torah. That is true, and that's a very important point that Ben O'Jacob makes. But the fact remains that I don't understand what the ulterior motive might be. To— after all, if anybody was going to be manipulative, it's going to be the guy who is being chased, Jacob, the one who was afraid. Esau is not afraid of Jacob. So what is in it? Why is it suspect? And here I don't see an explanation, and so I, I will agree that it's the most effusive, it's obviously the most effusive embrace in the Torah. I mean, it is excessive, I acknowledge, but so, so is Esau. After all, this follows the bowing 7 times, and Esau is a simple man. That's been established. And he was moved. Maybe he, after all this time, he has 400 men, he's done well in life. It's not like he didn't get the, the, the blessing from Isaac and has become a loser. He's not a loser. He is done well. That's another point of the 400 men. Somebody who employs 400 men has done well. I have 3 employees and can barely afford them. So it's, it's, uh, it's good. It doesn't make sense to me not to read it pretty much as it is. I think Esau is deeply moved by the— this is his only brother, it's his twin brother, remember— and is very touched by Jacob initiating. He didn't want to kiss him before Jacob did anything. It was after Jacob falls prone 7 times as if he's, if, as if he's the king of Egypt. This was a statement: you, my dear brother Esau, are royalty in my eyes. Well, Esau, the simple man, and, and we think a good-hearted man, he's never portrayed as cruel, never. Just as a guy who didn't care about spiritual matters and didn't care about keeping alive any great monotheistic tradition and didn't care about the birthright. He cared about the— about soup. He was prepared to sell it for soup. I mean, let's not forget that. Whatever you think of what Jacob did, Esau was, was prepared to sell the birthright for soup. He was not dying of starvation. It wasn't life. It wasn't death or birthright. So this simple guy loves— probably loved his brother. I mean, that's a common thing for brothers to hate each other and love each other. And if he has done well in life and time has elapsed and his brother bowed down 7 times to say, you are royalty to me, my dear older brother, even older by, by, I don't know, a minute, whatever it is, that the twins are separated in the birth order, then, uh, I believe it is completely sincere. And this is just a guy, you know, overdoing it, maybe running, hugging, falling on his neck, and, uh, and, uh, and kissing him. The kissing him, incidentally is the only word, I think, in the Torah with dots above it. And we don't know exactly why, but when the dots were put there, the dots do not have any sound. They're not vowels, they're just dots. And I don't believe there is a, again, a parallel in the Torah. And, uh, According to, uh, according to Sarna, Esau's kiss, undoubtedly sincere, appropriately signals the final resolution of the chain of tragic events precipitated by that other kiss, Jacob's deceitful kiss, that played a crucial role in the original blessing scene in chapter 27. Maybe the dots are there to emphasize the word, or maybe they are there because whoever put them there originally was suspicious. But again, I have no idea. I agree with Sarna, as I do 99.42% of the time, that it was sincere. And they both wept. Now, why did they both weep? Well, if you and your twin brother have had the most horrific relationship where one wants to kill the other, and you're finally hugging, wouldn't you weep? Who wouldn't weep? Now, I'll admit though that I think that the weeping on Jacob's part is, is also the weeping of, of, uh, of release of tension. Phew, man. This is worth a cry. All of my worries of all these years that this man will find me and kill me, I think I can now, uh, have this release of tension. That is exactly what, uh, Sarna believes too. His tears are a release from the emotional tension, even though his anxieties are not wholly relieved. I entirely support that, that take. Whatever your take— well, not whatever your take. It's a moving— if you do believe that it's a sincere weeping, and I do, and because I can see no ulterior motive for Esau, and I do believe that Jacob has grown and feels at least ambivalent about how Esau was treated. And now that he sees Esau has done well, he doesn't have that guilt. Now that he sees that Esau can hug him, I think that there he is, he's relieved. I think we need to put ourselves in the place of these people, and when we do, it becomes more explicable. I, it, it, why we wouldn't act differently. And so I, I buy the sincerity of the weeping. It's a very, very touching moment, and it's part and parcel of the brilliance of Genesis. In its, in its family depictions. Every family in Genesis has huge problems, huge problems. And the reason that every family in Genesis has huge problems is because nearly every family in the history of the world has had huge problems. Families often have far more problems within themselves than they do with outsiders. It's the battleground of humanity, the family, unfortunately. But that's the way it is for many. And that's why, one of the many reasons I believe in the authenticity of the Torah, because it's real. This is real family life. The patriarchs didn't have terrific family lives. And, and of course, the whole story of Jacob is essentially a revisiting upon him what he had done. Uh, just as, uh, he had terrible tension with his brother, he created a situation where his child, his favorite child, had terrible tension with his brothers. He was the favorite child of Rebecca and has terrible problems with Esau, his favorite child and Rachel's favorite. Has terrible tension with their brothers, with his brothers, Joseph and his brothers, because that's the way life works, as everyone knows, most everyone, that the mistakes— I won't say the sins— the mistakes of child rearing come back to haunt the next generation. That's the— it's my belief in general that we do not suffer in this life from our acts of evil. We suffer from our mistaken acts. We— mistakes we pay for, not our evil. Evil is generally recompensed in the next —by God.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

One Nation Under God. Here's Franklin Graham.

I'm inviting you to join with us and to pray for America. Pray that we as individuals and as a nation turn to the God of our fathers, the God of the Bible.

As we approach America's 250th, join Franklin in praying for our nation every day. A new prayer is posted daily at onenationundergod.com. Invite your friends and family to pray too. onenationundergod.com.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom.

But that's— that I think would be— that's the ultimate view of Judaism, certainly. But mistakes we pay for dearly in this world. It's almost unfair, because a mistake, after all, is a mistake. Jacob pays dearly for his mistake in spoiling Joseph and in showing that he is the favorite son. He pays a terrible price in the antipathy of the brothers toward his favorite child, his other children. And nothing hurts a parent more than when their children hate each other. Or don't, don't, don't even, or merely don't love each other. So we now have part of the roller coaster of family life where you have great love, you have great battles, and you have great tension, and you have resolution. There is no family on earth that has not had tears. What is the great story from the Buddha? Who, uh, a woman who's lost her child Says Buddha, you know, it's not fair. What is the reason that I lost my child? And he said, bring me a mustard seed from any— from, from a family that has not suffered, and I will tell you the— and I will tell you the answer. But of course, the woman cannot find such a mustard seed because there is no such family. So It's rather universal, these problems. Verse 5: Looking about, he saw the women and the children— that's Esau— who he asked, 'Are these with you?' He answered— that is Jacob— 'The children with whom God has favored your servant.' And here he goes back to the language again of not merely your brother, your servant. I bow down 7 times to say you are my superior, and I, I now call myself your servant. Then the maids with their children came forward and bowed low. Next Leah with her children came forward and bowed low. So they're all bowing, eh, his entire family, his whole clan is bowing to uncle, brother-in-law Esau. That's powerful. It's a statement that— to a further reinforcement to Esau. Look at this, my brother has told his family how great I am. They're all bowing down to me. And I'm not cynical about it. I think it was done for ambiguous reasons, but I do believe that there's a sincerity too in that it's an act of contrition. They don't— I don't think they know what Jacob did to Esau. It's hard for me to imagine that he has explained to all of his children that he tricked his brother into— he tricked his father, that is their grandfather, into getting this blessing. So all they know is, wow, look at Dad, look at my husband, uh, how, how much he respects his older brother. Isn't that beautiful? So we too will bow down. So last Joseph and Rachel came forward and bowed low, and he asked, what do you mean by all this company which I have met? That is, the he there is Esau. He answered, that's Jacob, to gain my lord's favor. Here we go again. One of the words, why did you bring all these people to greet me, Esau says, and he answers quite, quite frankly. Rather honestly to gain my lord's favor. And now it's my lord. I'm servant, you're my lord. I bow down to you as if you're a king. Esau said, I have enough, my brother. Let what you have remain yours. But Jacob said, no, I pray you, if you would do me this favor, accept from me this gift, for to see your face is like seeing the the face of God, and you have received me favorably. Please accept my present which has been brought to you, for God has favored me and I have plenty. And when he urged him, he has accepted. Now you will notice that Esau confirms what I said. I have enough, my brother. I don't need anything from you materially. And that's, that's a further reinforcement of my point. This probably could not have happened this smoothly if Esau had not succeeded. As they say, the best revenge is success. But I don't even mean it cynically. Esau has done okay. Esau looks at his life and says, hey, I didn't get the birthright, but by golly, I've done really well. And in the ways that matter to Esau, he has done well. Remember, Esau didn't give a hoot. It says, and he despised the birthright. That's the most important part of that, of that whole scene with the porridge or the soup. He didn't care about it. Why did, why did Jacob care about it? It doesn't promise more, more material goods, because— and here I think it is fair to say— Jacob was more in tune with the values, the spirituality, the God-centeredness of his father and mother than Esau was. So he needed— he wanted that blessing for those reasons, not, not to give him more sheep and cattle and servants, which in any event, uh, it appears Esau has more of. So Esau is happy. Esau, Esau doesn't care now. Esau has succeeded in life. He's a successful man, so why would he be angry anymore anyway? But he still wants to offer, uh, this present. And, uh, Again, Sarna the Wise notes, Esau does not reciprocate, thereby intimating that what takes place is the settlement of an old score, not an exchange of civilities. He doesn't offer— Esau doesn't offer Jacob anything. It's not an exchange of gifts. So that is a way of saying, by accepting, Esau accepts because he knows Jacob owes me something. So that is a very good scene. They really— there's a reconciliation here which is not too common in the, uh, well, I can't say it's not too common, maybe not too common in life, but after all, Jacob— Joseph and his brothers also reconcile at the end after terrible, obviously terrible tension in times. Terrible tension and terrible times. So there's no— Esau doesn't say here, okay, well, I have a present for you. Good point by Sarna. And Esau said, let us start our journey and I will proceed at your pace. Now this is an odd thing here. Because what is— why does Esau suggest that they travel together? I don't know. Maybe he wants to reconnect and stay for a while with his brother. I guess, I guess that is possible. My general, my general approach is that the simplest explanation is usually the best, but But Jacob said to him, My lord knows that the children are frail, and that the flocks and herds which are nursing are a care to me. If they are driven hard a single day, all the flocks will die. Let my lord go on ahead of his servant, while I travel slowly at the pace of the cattle before me and at the pace of the children, until I come to my lord in Seir. Now, uh, Jacob encourages Esau to think that his destination is Seir so as to get him to return home as soon as possible. In any event, it is pretty clear to me that Jacob is tricking his brother again. I'm sorry to say, but I can't blame him. He wants to travel with Esau like I want to travel on a plane whose baggage has not been checked. It's not— he figures, look, things are good, I'm delighted, he knows I love him and respect him as my older brother, he is my Lord, I am his servant, but frankly, I'd like to get out of here because they never do. He never does catch up with his brother Esau. And I have looked at all sorts of commentaries, and I have not found a better explanation than that he never intended to catch up and just prayed that he would go ahead. So you'll say, is that wrong? Well, you know, in general it's wrong to trick people, but, uh, God will have to judge this one. I, I don't want to judge in this case. Then Esau said, verse 15, let me assign to you some of the men who are with me, you know, to protect you, because this is— you're just traveling with flocks and, you know, kids nursing. But Jacob said, oh no, my lord is too kind to me. So Esau started back that that day on his way to Seir. And here we go, folks. But Jacob journeyed on to Sukkot. So there's no other read that I can think of other than that he had no intention of catching up and was non-hurtfully trying to get rid of his brother. There's, there's no— I mean, he goes in a different direction. And built a house for himself and made stalls for his cattle. That's why the place was called Sukkot. Sukkot is the plural, it means booths or little houses. Jacob arrived safe in the city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan, having come thus from Padan-aram, and he encamped before the city. The parcel of land where he pitched his tent he purchased from the children of Tamar, Shechem's father, for 100 kesitas. He set up an altar there and called it El Elohe Yisrael, God, or El, the God of Israel.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

One Nation Under God. Here's Franklin Graham.

I'm inviting you to join with us and to pray for America. Pray that we as individuals and as a nation turn to the God of our fathers, the God of the Bible.

As we approach America's 250th, join Franklin in praying for our nation every day. A new prayer is posted daily at OneNationUnderGod.com. Invite your friends and family to pray too. OneNationUnderGod.com.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom.

Uh, you have no parallel of Esau doing such a thing. The carrier of monotheism is clearly of the twins, only Jacob. There's a lesson to be learned, huge lesson there. And that is, once again, it's a repeating theme that I have pointed out and do point out regularly in the Torah, that blood is not what carries values. It is the human that carries values, that values and blood have nothing to do with each other. You can't get closer than being twins, I guess, identical twins, but beyond that you can't get closer. Raised by the same parents, born at the same time, so raised at the same time, in the womb for the same 9 months, and they are utterly and totally different people. And I hasten to add, Esau is not ever depicted as a bad person, and the tradition should never so depict him. But at the same time, he has an utterly different value system, and he, he just doesn't care about the God of what becomes Israel. That God matters to Jacob, and that's what matters, because without monotheism, you have no chance for a good world. And that sets us up for chapter 34 with Shechem and the terrible story of Dinah and what happens to her and the men who took her in Shechem. And that ends chapter 33 of Genesis. I feel like smashing a wine glass, putting it in a small handkerchief. You should. It seems only appropriate.

On tomorrow's Sunday Fireside Chat. This is—

it's actually, as an American, it is painful for me to tell you this, that so much of importance. The American Medical Association, and this has nothing to do with autism or vaccines, announced that it is wrong to put the sex of a child on the birth certificate. Because there's no such thing as gender. It is something that the child will decide later. That's the American Medical Association, and then I'm supposed to believe them on vaccines? So I want you to know, I have come to you burned on the issue of my government not telling me the truth, and particularly the medical authorities. So feel free to react to that. Or we can continue on the vaccine issue. Well, I, you know, I came into the, to the vaccine and public health issue as an environmental attorney who'd spent 30 years suing big polluters, but also suing the government agencies that are supposed to regulate those polluters and witnessing firsthand time and time again how those agencies had been captured by the industries they were supposed to regulate.

Join us tomorrow to hear more on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. This has been Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Visit DennisPrager.com for thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, and classic radio programs, and to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles.

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