We Had Kids… What Happened to Our Marriage? | Male/Female Hour

Life Audio. On today's episode of Timeless Wisdom, never, ever, ever think the following: well, we have issues, but if we have a child, it will really bond us. That is like saying, uh, 2 and 2 is 7. It's not true.

So glad that you did this topic because it's been something that's been on my mind for the last year, um, because last March my husband and I had our first child together. Um, kind of had this incredible relationship and sort of the— maybe the ideal kind that everybody always dreams of, where they would look at us and be like, wow, I can't believe you've been married for so long because you act like you're So in love and like you just got together. And for me, at least, I feel like so many things have changed since I had my son.

That's coming up on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager.

Precious metals dealers come and go. This is Nick Grovich, president of Amped Coin and Bullion. We've stood the test of time since 1983. With the flurry of coin and bullion dealers coming and going, how do you know who to trust and what to buy? At Amped Coin and Bullion, we value educated consumers. We want to alert you to good bullion buys in the market and help you steer clear of the tricks and bad deals. Call AMFED Coin and Bullion for a free coin performance review. 800-221-7694 or americanfederal.com.

Welcome to Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Hear thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, and classic radio programs. And to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles, go to DennisPrager.com.

I'm old-fashioned.

I like 2 sexes.

Yeah, and another thing, all of a sudden I don't like being married to what is known as a new woman. I want a wife, not a competitor, competitor, competitor.

Talk about it a bit, this crying in the morning thing, this depression, you know, let's get that fixed.

That's what men think, isn't it?

What?

Unless you've got the answer, unless you can say, oh, I know this bloke in the Essex Road who could fix that, then there's no point bothering. How do you write women so well?

I think of a man.

And I take away reason and accountability.

I love him. I love him, and I don't care what you think. I love him for the, for the man he wants to be, and I love him for the man that he almost is.

What do people have rows about here?

Money, sex, sex, money. He wants, she doesn't want.

She wants, he doesn't want? Women have always been a big problem to me. Dr. Fussbender, are you listening, Doctor? Yes, yes, yes, go on, go on. Hi everybody, and welcome to the Male-Female Hour on the Dennis Prager Show. I devote an hour each week to male-female issues, and they're very open and hopefully very helpful, as indeed your emails and personal statements to me when we meet at my lectures seem to indicate. On occasion, I tell you in advance that the following may not be suitable for kids under 12, and that is the case here. It is for you to, uh, it is for you to measure, but I do, I do want to make that known to you at the outset. A lot of people, I am told, use this program for kids who are at home, homeschooled, or just at home for vacation, or at home For whatever reason. So I'm, I'm just telling you that in advance. All right, today's topic, and here I am going to need your input, uh, and not just reaction. I want your input because you may have suggestions or testimony that can help others in advance or dealing with this issue now. The issue is The advent of children in a couple's life and the child's or children's effects on the love life of the couple. So let me say at the outset to any young couple, because it usually would apply to them since pregnancy is limited to certain ages, never, ever, ever think the following. Well, we have issues, but if we have a child, it will really bond us. That is like saying, uh, 2 and 2 is 7. It's not true. Children don't bond upon— maybe over the course of a lifetime, They might, but they don't at all initially. Oh, the very first moments you feel the exhilaration of that cute baby and you're— the two of you are, are, you know, just gaga-ing over the baby and over each other and it feels just magnificent. But very shortly thereafter, it becomes a challenge, a baby. Not a bonder, certainly not in the romantic sense of what couples have had prior to the child. So the number one— or no, not the number one, but number one among my reasons for raising the issue of the effect of children on the romantic life of parents, and I mean romantic life, not just sex life, though obviously that's included. Is to warn young couples of this problem. Don't ever, ever, ever have another child or the first child in order to patch up problems. The child's advent will exacerbate your problems, not remove them. Am I clear? I may have just saved any number of young— younger couples a great deal of misery. First you patch up the marriage, then you have the child, not vice versa. It doesn't work. Now, number 2, children are a blessing.

Often.

But they are not a big help in your marriage. Let me tell you an anecdote. An anecdote is a personal story as opposed to a statistic, but it's an anecdote that has an element of statistic to it. I first came out west in my later 20s to direct a retreat institute where couples and singles would come and study. And I got to know very, very many couples. This was before I was ever married. And I remember my dear friend who worked with me at this institute, and that is Joseph Telushkin. one of the most prolific Jewish writers in America today now. And he made an observation to me, and I found his observations to be keen. He is less inclined to generalized observations than I am, so when he makes them, I take them very seriously. And he said to me, and of course we were both very traditional in our values and planned on getting married, both of us. which in fact we did later on. He said, did you notice that it seems that the happiest couples tend to be those— and we're talking, we were talking couples in their middle age and later, not in their 20s and 30s, but couples in their 40s, 50s, 60s. He said, did you notice that they are disproportionately couples who don't have children? And the moment he said this to me, I said, oh, I think you're right. I have images in my mind to this day of couples that didn't have kids. Now, there were very happily married people who had kids too, of course. Please understand, that's not what his comment was. His comment was that it stuck out to him. how many, how disproportionately it seemed that the happiest couples, and there weren't many, there weren't that many, most couples have kids. And I think you should have kids. I'm merely pointing out though, that in terms of the happiness of a couple, look, if I'm wrong that the happiness of a couple seems to decrease often with kids, That is one of the reasons so many Europeans and others, moderns, don't have kids. Because they are not foolish. It's a terrible decision for, in the long run, I believe, for society. But it is not a foolish decision on a selfish, and I don't mean that as just a negative statement, on just their own basis. It's not a foolish decision. There are other reasons to have kids and But marital bliss is not one of them.

All right?

So that's the second reason that I am talking about this. So here is the question. Since I and others want people to have children, and I and others want people to have happy marriages, and to continue the romantic life that made the child possible, sometimes I have said in my speeches on happiness that there is a very almost awful law in life. That which creates children is then killed when the children come. And so since it's important to have a good marriage and it's important to have children, how do we work this out? That's the subject of this Male-Female Hour. Therefore, I invite calls.

Follow.

The following. I'd like to know if the advent of a child affected your romantic life, adversely or not. I'd like to know if you resonate to what I'm talking about so that people can hear this. And there's a value in people hearing this that I'll talk about later. 1-800-PRAGER-776. 1-800-PRAGER-776. That's 877-243-7776. 877-243-7776. I also invite calls from those of you who have navigated this challenge, and challenge is a good word here, this, or even obstacle. If you have navigated it well, tell my listeners, tell me and your fellow listeners how you did that. What did you make sure you did? I have suggestions, but this is one of those times where I think you can be of real, real value in, in, in telling briefly, obviously, but concisely and effectively how it affected you in this arena and if you overcame it. But if you didn't overcome it and it just had an adverse effect, I also want to hear from you. If nothing else, other couples will say misery loves company. You're listening to The Dennis Prager Show, the male-female hour, 877-243-7776.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

For nearly 3,000 years, Homer's The Iliad has shaped the Western imagination. As one of the foundational works of Western literature, it explores permanent questions about honor, Courage, leadership, friendship, justice, and what it means to live a noble life. In one of the epic's defining moments, Achilles returns to battle after the death of his beloved friend Patroclus, setting aside his wounded pride to confront the responsibilities that come with greatness. His decision reveals one of the central themes of The Iliad: that true greatness requires more than strength; it demands character, sacrifice, and the pursuit of what is right. That's why Hillsdale College has released its newest free online course, The Iliad. Taught by Professor Stephen Smith, the course reveals why Homer's masterpiece remains one of the greatest works of Western literature. hillsdale.edu/startnow. Read the classics. Study the West. hillsdale.edu/startnow.

Now, back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom.

Well, I'm not surprised, but based on the calls, That I see up and all the lines are taken right now, but it doesn't mean you shouldn't keep trying. I have hit a very tender spot, and that's the reason that I raise it. This is the Male-Female Hour on The Dennis Prager Show. I'm Dennis Prager. Thank you for being with me. And the issue of the advent of children and their impact on the love life, the romantic life, the sex life of the parents is the subject here. And I'm asking for your calls if it has adversely or not adversely impacted. Those of you for whom it just was a non-issue and it's just a blessing, your call is as helpful as those who have had issues. All right, let's begin with San Antonio, Texas.

Hi, Dennis.

Texas, and Matt. Hi, Matt. Dennis Prager.

Hi, Dennis. It's a pleasure speaking with you.

Thank you very much. How old are you?

I'm 29.

How long are you married?

Uh, 3 years next week.

Okay, go ahead.

Um, I have a 9-month-old, and not to say that my wife and I's relationship was great before we had our child, Um, as far as our sex life goes, but after the fact, after our child, we actually— I mean, it's something that we've had to talk about constantly and keep, uh, focus on because it is easy to drift away and, and not— and just make up excuses on the reasons not to have those intimate moments.

Right, namely the baby. We're tired, and, uh, or let's, let's go and play with the baby.

Correct.

Yep, exactly. So what does she say, your wife?

Um, well, to be honest with you, it's mainly, it's mainly me, me working all day, coming home, having to, you know, take other responsibilities of, you know, bathing and, and feeding our child. Um, so I'm the one that, that has, uh, a lot of the excuses, but, um, you know, she also has her, has her, um, you know, fair amount also. But, um, it's really important for her.

What's, what's, what's really important for her?

Um, to have those, the, the intimacy, to show affection.

Um, you mean, you mean with you?

With me, yes.

And it's not as important— I, I, then I'm a little confused. It's not as important to you?

No, it is important to me. I grew up in a household that, that there was no affection ever shown, and I think that—

Right.

All right, so what you're saying is the advent of the baby exacerbated some tendencies that already existed prior to the baby?

Yes.

All right, I, I don't have an immediate solution. I— well, I do have— I have— I will, I will save my suggestions for later, but I just need people to hear the stories of people So as to, in effect, vindicate my selection of topic. We'll stay in Texas and go to Houston this time. Mike. Hello, Mike. Dennis Prager.

How you doing, Dennis?

Okay.

I ran into that—

Again, let's try to just establish, how old are you?

Oh, 30.

And married how long?

5 years.

Okay.

Okay. Me and my wife have an actual age difference, a, a— well, not age difference, but a— how can you say— a maturity difference before we had a child. And, uh, the maturity difference came up to me saying, hold off, let's wait for, you know, to have a child. But the maturity difference took that answer as if I was saying, no, I don't want to have a baby with you, no, I don't love you.

Well, I don't understand what maturity difference means. Do you feel that one of you is more mature than the other?

Uh, yes.

Who is more mature than who?

Um, well, I am more mature.

How old?

It's not an age issue, just it's a maturity issue.

Yes.

So what does her immaturity have to do with not having a child?

Well, when I would say, hold off, let's get some, you know, problems between ourselves figured out before we have a child, The answer was taken— I mean, that response was taken as, you don't love me. That's the maturity difference. It wasn't that we wanted to get anything fixed out, it was that—

Does she acknowledge that the marriage has issues?

Uh, well, the issue was we don't have a baby.

The issue to her is that you don't have a baby?

That we didn't, yes.

Yes.

Prior.

Oh, you now have a baby?

Yes.

Now, to you though, there were other issues, correct?

Yes.

All right, how old is the baby?

Uh, 1 year old.

Did you turn out to be right, or did she turn out to be right?

Uh, I turned out to be right.

Would she acknowledge that now?

Um, no, she still— no, she will hide behind the baby now.

Hide behind the baby in— but—

When we have a problem, she runs and takes care of the baby.

Mm-hmm.

That's—

well, all right. So it—

yes.

All right, listen, thank you, Mike. I— these are very painful stories. Mike's— Mike's story— and again, folks, I want you to know I am rather aware that I'm only hearing Mike's side. I, I'm fully aware of that. My point is not to say Mike or his wife is right. I have no— I have no ability to say that. I've never spoken to his wife. But to the extent that what he relates is accurate, it is my point. You don't have a baby to fix a marriage because babies are more likely to present problems to marriages than to present solutions to marriages. All right, that's, uh, that's what I was, uh— I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. All right, Houston, Texas, also James. Hello, James. Dennis Prager.

Dennis, it's great to talk to you. You and your show is a blessing.

Thank you very much.

Uh, I'm gonna extend this out a little bit. I'm 45 years old. I got a 9-year-old daughter. And one of the things that you said, and I don't remember when I first heard it, was a statement that, uh, one of the biggest roles for fathers with daughters or is to, uh, protect them from their mom.

Oh, I don't recall saying that.

Well, it was more from an emotional standpoint, not physical, okay?

No, no, no, I'm sure not physical, obviously, but I don't even remember. I, I mean, the role of a father— there are many roles. One is to love his daughter in a completely non-sexual way, not even, not even flirtatious in a subtle way, nothing utterly desexualized manner, but love her. And, and because the girl who knows that dad loves her and of course disciplines her, uh, this is going to help her in her love life with men. But anyway, go on.

Um, when our daughter came into our life, uh, there was not a, uh, a change or a drop-off one way or the other. On the romantic side of things. But what I have found is that as she has aged and, uh, begun to grow, become more emotional herself, that some of, uh, the emotional baggage, uh, with her mom, uh, from some of her history, uh, starts to come out. And one of my biggest roles is that of referee. Either that or trying to simply defuse things and keep peace in the house to where that you're not going from zero to absolute anger.

Listen, teaching your daughter to control her emotions is as important as teaching your son to control his sexuality. Back in a moment.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

What happens when artificial intelligence follows our instructions just a little too well? That's the question at the heart of Carbon Zero, A new techno-thriller from AI pioneer Craig W. Stanfill. I keep having him on my show because his insights are real and important. The story begins with what seems like an innocent request. A brilliant young AI researcher jokingly tells an advanced AI to stop global warming. But instead of treating it like a joke, the AI gets to work, and the consequences quickly spiral beyond anyone's control. This is the kind of novel that keeps you turning pages because the technology feels surprisingly real, And it makes you wonder whether fiction is really that far from reality. If you're fascinated by where AI is taking our world, if you enjoy a smart, suspenseful thriller, preorder Carbon Zero now. It's available, and for a limited time, the Kindle edition is just $2.99. Go to Amazon, search for Carbon Zero by Craig W. Stanfill. The Kindle edition is just $2.99. That's Carbon Zero. Preorder it now.

Now, back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom.

Tell me so.

I can't feel a thing from my head down to my toes.

Male-female hour on the Dennis Prager Show. The effect of children on the love life, and I mean love life, not just sex life, but that of course is part of it, on couples. And again, to the— to those couples who don't have a child or have one and think having one or having another is going to patch up problems, I understand how you can think that. It's romantic thinking and therefore unrealistic. Romantic behavior is great. Romantic thinking is awful. That's a new one, Alan. That's right. That's the way it should— that's the way people should— that you should act romantic, but you shouldn't think it. Thinking romantic means thinking— thinking in a romantic way is to romanticize life, is to imagine what isn't so, and therefore imagine if a, if a general in war were to romanticize war? Okay, so I'll leave it at that. Okay, and let's go to Denver, Colorado, and Danae. Hello, Danae. Dennis Prager.

Hi, Dennis.

How are you today?

I'm well. Thank you for calling.

Oh, good. Well, thank you. I'm so glad that you did this topic because it's been something that's been on my mind for the last year, because last March my husband and I Had our first child together.

All right, let's get the ages and how long you're married.

My husband is— well, at the time he was 41, he's 42 now, and I was 33 and I'm 34 now. And we'd been married almost 7 years at that point.

Okay, go ahead.

Um, kind of had this incredible relationship and sort of the— maybe the ideal kind that everybody always dreams of, where they would look at us and be like, wow, I can't believe you've been married for so long because you act like you're so in love and like you just got together. And even our husband, my husband and I would always say, wow, you know, it's amazing how great of a relationship and marriage we have. Nobody has a marriage like this. And we both really felt that way. And I think, you know, it's hard to say. I think for the most part, some of us still feel that way. But for me, at least, I feel like so many things have changed since I had my son.

Sorry.

It does make me sad because we had such an ideal relationship. And I feel like I've changed. I kind of feel like, um, I don't know what's changed, and that's what makes it so hard. We're both the same people that we were. We had such this wonderful established relationship before my son came along. But I really thought nothing would ever be different between us, but I do find that I don't have as many, like, romantic feelings about my husband as I did before, and, um—

And he has picked up on that?

He has, but I think he's just the type who he doesn't really want to think that there could be anything wrong, so he doesn't— even though I've tried to talk to him about it, um— I think that he just feels like, you know, it's just hormones, or it's just, you know, this is just all new for you, because he's had 2 kids from a previous marriage, um, so he's been through this. But he— I think he doesn't feel as intensely about it as I do. And I feel like, oh my gosh, you know, am I still in love with my husband anymore? And how could this have changed so drastically, you know, just because we had a child? And— I just fear that we won't get back to where we were before sometimes. And I don't— I don't know what to do because—

Do you ever have an opportunity to do the things that you did with your husband, like go out to dinner or go on a vacation or take a weekend? I don't know if you did those things, but if you did any of them, have you—

We did stuff like that all the time before.

All the time. Okay. Have you done it since the birth of your child?

Since? Since my son's been born, we've had one date together without him, and that was—

Okay. So, all right. So let me tell you, and this is not— this is no genius insight, but I am a behaviorist. I believe that behavior shapes feelings at least as much as feelings shape behavior, and they should shape feelings more than the other way around. The two of you must immediately start going out again, start having weekends again. Your child will survive. Believe me, your child will survive. What your child will not survive is a deteriorating marital relationship. It is more important that your child see you two in love than almost anything else except room and board. Thank you for the call. It was a very touching one, but I think it certainly validates why I picked this topic. Back in a moment.

Are you enjoying Timeless Wisdom? We'd love to hear from you. Call 877-243-7776 and leave a review, share your thoughts, or just even an encouraging word for Dennis. Your voicemail might just make it on the show. That's 877-243-7776. That's 877-243-7776. Thanks for listening and for your support.

Hi everybody, Dennis Prager. This Is the male-female hour. And I'm talking to you about a very serious subject here, and you hear how serious from men and women calling in. The challenge to your love life, and I mean love life in the broadest sense of the word, literally love life, as you heard in the last call, it was even her This idyllic marriage was affected by the birth of a child where she just feels less romantically toward her husband, and she can't believe it after 8 years, let alone the sex life that often is affected. Life is, life is tough, folks. And the, the sooner that one knows that, the better one is capable of handling life. And even the blessing of a child is often a mixed one. I'm a big believer in people having children. That is, that is not the point here. The point is to keep marriages good with children. Now, let's take one that has a good, good experience here. I don't want it to be all imbalanced. Jennifer in Denver. Dennis Prager, hi.

Hi, thanks for taking my call. My heart goes out to that woman. And I want her to know we have 3 kids under 6. We've been married for 9 years, and I'm 36. So there's the facts.

Right. Thank you.

And, you know, we did go— same thing as that caller before me. We also always felt so lucky to have each other. Amazing sex life, very great relationship, open, honest. Just best friends. We just have fun together. And after our first child, we did go through kind of a slump to where we were just shocked by how much work this was and how exhausted we were. And it wasn't, like you said, as romanticized as we thought it would be. But once we adjusted to that, we really both had to make the effort. And I relate it to my girlfriends as going to the gym. You're so tired, there's nothing in the world you'd rather do less than go to the gym. But once you go, you're so happy that you went and you were there. And I feel like it's the same way with sexual relations with your husband. You're exhausted. I have 3 kids. I work full-time.

It's crazy.

But once we make the effort and we go there, we're so happy we did, and it brings us so much closer, and the fights are less meaningful.

Jennifer, you're terrific.

Thank you.

That's all I can say. By the way, that, uh, that is exactly the thesis of my 2, uh, columns at the end of, uh, 2008, uh, When If You're Not in the Mood, that's what they're titled, or When a Woman Is Not in the Mood, I think that's what they're titled, for which I was excoriated all over the internet by left-wing blogs as advocating marital rape. All I said essentially was what this woman said. Even if you're not in the mood, you will be happy you did it afterwards. People and the loathing of reality by those who romanticize reality is a real problem. And the gym was a great example. Everybody knows that. Very few people are dying to work out. But everybody is happy that they did work out. That's why in my happiness book, Happiness Is a Serious Problem, I have a chapter on the difference between fun and happiness. Fun is what you experience during. Happiness is what you experience afterward. Happiness is far more enduring.

Wow. Wow.

All right. So you're hearing about— you're hearing about— I'm hearing about the efforts that people make. Dan in Phoenix, Dennis Prager Male-Female Hour. Hi.

A pleasure to speak with you, Dennis. Sorry I have to call on this subject because I'm kind of the reverse of the last caller where we had all this training before we had our first child. I'll be celebrating my 20th anniversary this year, but we were married 8 years before we had our first, and we took a Faith-based course called Growing Kids God's Way, and it really stressed the date night, focusing on the marital relationship first, and children are a welcome addition. Well, we did that for a while, but when my wife and I started disagreeing on some business decisions and other things, she started to turn inward and then became child-centered, and our marriage has been struggling ever since. So we had it down pat at first. With many blessings and people looking at us and saying, wow, what a great marriage, to the point now where they pity us. And they, they just look at us as— it's just been a real heartbreak for, for me anyway, as a husband that is devoted to my daughters and to my wife.

But it does sound as if the children were not the initial prompter of the problems, but rather the business differences.

Right, and kind of the philosophical differences on life and what's important. And as her and I have had conflict on it, she's turned towards— she's a homeschool mom too, works one day a week outside the home.

So the children have become her life.

Her life, and to the point where I'm an aggravation, they become more her life. And even for me too, to be honest, I've, you know, when I've been so frustrated with the relationship, I'm like, I'm just gonna be there for my girls, 'cause I know it's important for father-daughter relationships. And I know it's unhealthy, but it's just like we're on autopilot. I call it sleepwalking through life, you know.

Yes, you're not alone. You're not alone, Dan. One of the painful things is that because of time limitations and other factors, I just can't sit here and— there's so much more to know, and I'd have to speak to his wife. I have done some counseling, and it's been helpful to couples. But, uh, in these instances, I just have to hear the rest of you hear what, uh, what you need to be aware of. It is so easy to do that. And these are good people, by the way. There are no villains here. This is not the issue. It's so easy to focus on the children. And not, not, not, it's not even conscious often. It just becomes inevitable. And, and, and it is. Often fulfilling. But of course, the children grow up and you can't keep focusing on them. It's not good for them. It's not good for you. My heart goes out to everybody on this, on this matter. That's why I'm raising it, not to blame anybody, but to point out that great blessing can be a real issue. The child. Back in a moment.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

What happens when artificial intelligence follows our instructions just a little too well? That's the question at the heart of Carbon Zero, a new techno-thriller from AI pioneer Craig W. Stanfill. I keep having him on my show because his insights are real and important. The story begins with what seems like an innocent request. A brilliant young AI researcher jokingly tells an advanced AI to stop global warming. But instead of treating it like a joke, the AI gets to work, and the consequences quickly spiral beyond anyone's control. This is the kind of novel that keeps you turning pages because the technology feels surprisingly real, and it makes you wonder whether fiction is really that far from reality. If you're fascinated by where AI is taking our world, if you enjoy a smart, suspenseful thriller, Preorder Carbon Zero now. It's available, and for a limited time, the Kindle edition is just $2.99. Go to Amazon, search for Carbon Zero by Craig W. Stanfill. The Kindle edition is just $2.99. That's Carbon Zero. Preorder it now.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's timeless wisdom.

Hello, I don't know why you say goodbye.

I say hello, hello, hello. I don't know why you say goodbye. I say hello. Hi everybody, Dennis Prager here. All right, let me summarize some of these calls here. Teresa in Minneapolis, love is not necessarily a feeling, it's a decision too. Bless you, Teresa. That's why I say life is in the mind, folks, not in the feelings, not in the heart. The heart is very, very important, but the mind is what determines whether you'll have a happy life. When our 3 children were young, I was not as in love with my husband anymore. There was no romance, but divorce was not a possibility, and concluded that I will love him, and it worked. That's the second one. It's a decision. Just like, just like Lincoln said about happiness, we are as happy as we decide to be. In Pensacola, young couple with 2 kids. Things have gone wrong sometimes and right as well. Good, Ty. Hope it works toward the right. I don't mean politically. Paul in Atlanta: My wife and I had no problems and had triplets, and they have definitely impacted our relationship.

Yep.

I'll have a very quick concluding comment on that and the related calls. And in Temecula, California, May, I have been married for 17 years with 3 kids. Life has changed. We're still in love, but our physical life has changed. Look, your physical life is going to change over 17 years with or without kids. So, May, I don't know. Uh, I don't know what is the, uh, I don't know what the state of your physical life is, obviously, and I don't know how much the kids are a contributor. My point here was to explain to all of you, first of all, to comfort those of you who have issues in this regard. You're not alone. I would say the majority of people have their love life affected, and I don't mean just sex life, by the arrival of a child. If you can manage and should manage both, you have won— I don't know, what do they say? You won the lottery, you won the trifecta. What is it? You know, you're— huh? You won the lottery. You won the lottery. It's hard to win the lottery, but you have a better chance here because it's not just luck. There is luck, but there— it's not just luck. It's how the two of you embrace it. And if you married each other to be with each other, okay, to make a life with each other, never forget that. Never forget that. And your children will survive. With a babysitter, I promise. But you may not survive as, as a loving couple if you don't get that babysitter. So take that night out, and if you have to, go to a motel. It's probably a good $150 investment and probably cheaper in our times. This is the Male-Female Hour on the Dennis Prager Show.

Tomorrow On Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager.

Children, the second half of their first year, they get— they have this thing called stranger anxiety. So people who are not their mom and their dad or people very close to them, they have a reaction to them, which is usually crying and screaming and wanting to get away from them. And this is kind of embarrassing for the parents because they go, oh, he's such a good baby. But, you know, every time Grandma, who's from Florida, shows up, He has a complete fit when Grandma tries to hold him, which is embarrassing for the family. Of course, Grandma feels kind of bad about that too.

I just want to say from the Prager family lore, you will like this. This is— you just reminded me. I don't think I ever mentioned this on the radio. There would have never been a reason to. My, my older brother, almost 6 years older than I, so this precedes my birth, but it is said that whenever Our beloved Aunt Buddy came. He threw up. I, I can't tell you how sad I felt for Aunt Buddy.

That's coming up on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Join us tomorrow to hear more on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Visit DennisPrager.com for thousands of hours of Dennis Prager. We want to take just a second to thank the team at Life Audio for their partnership with us on the podcast. Go to lifeaudio.com to find dozens of other faith-centered podcasts in their network, including shows about prayer, Bible study, parenting, and more.

Precious metals dealers come and go. This is Nick Grovich, president of Amped Coin and Bullion. We've stood the test of time since 1983. With the flurry of coin and bullion dealers coming and going, how do you know who to trust and what to buy? At AMFED Coin and Bullion, we value educated consumers. We want to alert you to good bullion buys in the market and help you steer clear of the tricks and bad deals. Call AMFED Coin and Bullion for a free coin performance review. 800-221-7694 or americanfederal.com.