Dr. Don Wood reflects on fear of making mistakes, attributing it to how people (especially parents) respond when children err. He recounts a childhood anecdote where, at about six years old, he mistakenly mailed multiple bills after misunderstanding his father’s instructions; his father responded with laughter and a gentle correction (“I don't think I explained this very well”), which taught him that mistakes are a normal part of life and reduced his fear of erring. The piece encourages parents to respond calmly to children's mistakes to prevent lifelong fear of failure.
Chapters
Are you always scared of making mistakes? The fear of making mistakes is coming from the way they were treated when they made a mistake. I remember I was about six years of age, my dad was doing his bills, and I remember sitting down and asking him what he was doing. So he showed me that. He takes the electric bill and he writes out a check, and he says, now take the check and take the bill, put it in the envelope, seal up the envelope, put a stamp on it. And now will you do me a big favor? Run this down to the mailbox and put in the mailbox for you. So I remember feeling all excited. I'm helping my dad. I ran down full speed to the mailbox, put it in the mailbox, came running back looking for my next assignment. But my dad wasn't sitting at the desk, But I saw all the other bills and envelopes. So I just started randomly just stuffing these pieces of paper into envelopes, sealing them up, putting stamps on them. And I ran down to the post office and shoved them in the mailbox. And when I get back, my dad's there, and he says, where are all the bills? Where are the envelopes? Happily, I'm smiling. I said, oh, I mailed them for you. And. And instead of yelling and getting mad, he just laughed. And he said, I don't think I explained this very well. And that was his response to it. Now, think about yourself. How would your parent have handled that? How would you handle that as a parent? The way my dad handled it was perfect. That's the way it should be handled. So when I grew up, I wasn't afraid to make mistakes. I didn't like making them, but at least I wasn't afraid. I knew mistakes were a part of life. But if you've had those experiences, you may be afraid to make those mistakes.