Live Q&A with Dr. Wood: Ask Me Anything! [March Edition]

The.

Really into doing the. The recordings after for the first 30 days, I think I redid them again. And I haven't had any issues with any kind of anxiety since, I mean, to be honest with you. So, you know, thanks for that. But you know, why the.

Quite.

My question is like, I. I don't even know what to do now. I'm like, okay, why, man, if this. If this result was so good, like, could I do something to improve it? Can I take it to another level? You know, and. And that's really the. The crux of my question.

Yeah, great question. It's something we did want to share with people because there are a whole bunch of other audios. I don't know if you ever looked at all the audio series.

I did a bunch of them.

Yeah.

There was the. The walking one, the communication one. I'm forgetting a few. But yes, there are a bunch of them. Yes.

Yeah. So those are always really good to do. We are looking at adding more stuff as well. Like. Like this thing on Friday, I think is just another great. Mike is an amazing business leader. He helps a lot of people grow their businesses and they love what we do. So sort of a good combination us together. We do have TIP now, which is dealing with any current stuff. That's another program we have in our. So if you're interested in that, just let you know, Maya know that you're interested in that. And again, we're working on more the performance stuff because once people are clear, we really want to start driving even more performance and higher performance. So keep your eye open. There's going to be some stuff this year. We're making a lot of new changes to it as well, which I think you'll like.

Yeah. So the performance stuff, is that all in the Kajabi app or that just stuff coming out?

Yeah, it should be in the Tip Today app.

Oh, Tip Today.

Okay.

I don't even have.

So I'm behind if you don't have that. That's the app on iPhone and Android, so you can download it and it's direct, so you have it on your phone.

Okay, I'm getting it right now.

Yeah, yeah. So what was before Kajabi app? Now we have our own branded app, so it's now called Tip Today and in it you'll have access to your program, all our audios, and you should have access to TIP now as well. So if you don't ping me and I'll make sure that's added to your library.

Okay. I'm just downloading it now and do I just email you or something, Maya?

Yeah, you can email me.

Okay, I'll do. That's my question. I appreciate you guys. Thanks for the work. And yeah, go. Leaves, I guess.

All right.

That's what I got to do. I got to go work with the leaves. Maybe we can help them. Yeah.

Yes. Yes, do that, please.

Very good.

All right, awesome.

Then we have. Liz has a question.

Hey, Liz.

Hey. Good morning, everyone. Good day, I guess.

Good day.

My question is I am listening to all the audios, and there's a series of questions right after we listen to these audios.

So.

So what is the idea or concept of these random questions after the recording? And what was the thinking behind it? How does it help me to develop.

From these questions? I mean, I've been diligently answering them, so I was just wondering. I was just curious, what was the purpose of all these random questions?

It's really interesting because when I developed the program, one of the things that I realized is when we get into habits and behaviors, we stop thinking. So the idea behind the audios is to start probing our minds to start thinking. And sometimes they may feel like it's a random question out of nowhere. But a lot of the times those questions are designed to start making us think, because as long as you're running on a. On a program, you stop thinking. But the questions are only for you. Nobody is watching them or looking at them. But I created. I did those for the walking out behaviors. I also did a whole series of questions for walking out addiction, if anybody's done that. And again, the whole idea is we stop thinking when we get into patterns. And the idea is to try to break the pattern. And I've had a lot of people say to me, like, I just get this epiphany every once in a while when I'm reading the question. It's like, I've never thought about that. I. Or I haven't thought about this in years. And so it may be something that you needed to know, and your mind will bring it to you if that. Does that make some sense?

Yes. Yes, it did. It did create a different thinking pattern, and it helped me to look deeper because I, you know, I. I started off writing some, like, random stuff. Then I said, you know what? Let me be a little bit more reflective and answer it for to my. From my deepest essence of who I am. So that helps.

That's exactly it. And if you remember when you listen to the audios, what I talk about is be specific. And when you think, you're specific, be even more specific. Like really dig in and dig deep into what that question may mean for you. Some of them may just sort of pass through. They don't have a big meaning to you, but some of them may just go, oh, my gosh, why have I never thought about that before? Or, you know, for example, what's your favorite time of life? What period of your life do you enjoy the most? I have a lot of people say right now, but then some people will say, well, this period of my life was the period that I enjoyed the most. So then the idea behind that is if you had another period in your life that you felt was really positive for you, what were you doing then? You see how it would lead you to start thinking what was different then that it is now that I haven't thought about that I could start making changes. All those audios are focused on change. And the idea is, is that when you're listening to the audios, you're in alpha brainwave state. And that's when the mind feels safe to start looking and examining what changes would be beneficial. And if you remember the idea is what you want thoughts that now become beneficial, appealing and possible. And so you want to train your mind to only bring thoughts that have that categories, those. Those three categories.

That makes sense.

Yep. Good question. A lot of people have asked about that. So I like that because it's a really important. The audio. Sometimes people will go, oh, I think I'm good now. I mean, we get that a lot. But the audios are really, really powerful.

So make sure that you do the audios. We're going to listen to one of the audios today. That. And we'll do that in a little bit. I'm not sure when Maya has that planned, but the idea behind it is an audio that I did for pain. And the idea is when people are in pain. So I worked on this with Kami Rice, who is a big advocate for addiction people. Her son was a. Unfortunately passed away from an addiction pain medication that he got put on. So she's developed her own foundation and she's putting what they call health care specialists into hospitals that when people get put on pain medication, they. They're not told what to do. They're just given pain medication and they just take it. So her health care specialists are there to train them on how to take it. So I created, along with Jason Campbell, who's an amazing artist. John knows Jason. We put together some pain audio. So I want you to listen to it. So if you Ever have a. That may not be in pain all the time, but the idea is how to deal with pain. So these audios are developed to listen to that.

I have listened to a bunch of those. And yes, Jason is absolutely amazing. You get used to the bell idea in terms of a prompt.

Yeah.

And his voice sounds very different on your recording than it does when I actually just chat with him, like when I'm just talking to him. But at any rate, I was delighted to see y' all team up and do that. And it's nice to see that within the group that I used to go to out in Tempe, Arizona, that there's some cross pollination.

We're going to be doing a whole series of audios together. So I love what he does. He does a lot of breath work, he does a lot of meditation. He's a Zen master. I mean, he's really good. So I think the combination of the two, I'd love to get everybody's thoughts on after you hear this audio, if you like it, because he adds another element to them as well.

Right. We have a really interesting question. It says. Let me just get to that because I love this. The chat is exploding.

There was a question here that said, I can't find it now, but basically it said that listening to the audios makes me feel the opposite, makes me feel unsafe. So it gets their mind racing. There you go. When I do the audio, I feel the opposite unsafe. My body rejects it. I get mad and agitated and I'm normally a very calm and pleasant person. Is this common?

Well, what that probably tells me is that you've been suppressing a lot of thoughts and sort of pushing them down. And what we're doing is making you think and your mind is not okay with that. It's struggling with it. Work through it. There's a reason why that's happening, because you remember what I've always talked about. The purpose of an emotion, a feeling or a sensation is what a call for action. So the reason you're feeling those emotions is because your mind is trying to get you into an action. It wants some resolution to it. So that's why you're feeling uncomfortable. You have basically not dealt with something and your mind is trying to get you to deal with it. And so when you get into that very calm, safe mode, even though you're saying it doesn't feel safe, it's because you're uncomfortable.

So I would really start taking a look. I think those audios are really going to be powerful for you. You just may have to work through the discomfort to get your mind starting to say, okay, I gotta, I gotta do something different.

That's my initial thought on it.

And feel free to ask follow up questions if you have them. Obviously, on the topic of audios, we got another question about them. It says, once I have completed the 30 day audios, should I then do the other 30 day audios? Is there particular order in which they should be done?

Are you talking about the walking out addiction ones?

I am assuming that they're talking about the walking out addiction because that is the only other 30 day program that we have. Others are shorter.

Okay.

Yeah. I mean, I would just continue to go through. It doesn't hurt to go through any of the audios. They're just again, when I talk, when I do the addiction audios. Addictions could also just be habits and behaviors. Why am I stuck? Why do I always do this all the time? So that's again just a pattern or a code. So the idea behind the addiction audios is talking about how the brain works and how it gets stuck into these codes. Because I talk about addiction is just a code. A habit is just a code. So your, your mind knows that I'm going to go to this because it defaults automatically. And that's what I said is the thinking process stops when we get into habits. We don't think, we just go straight into the habit. And the idea is to say, is that beneficial? Is that appealing? Is it possible to do? Probably because you're doing it, but it may not be beneficial or appealing. So I would listen to all of them. It can hurt. I mean, if you listen to the. You don't have to have an addiction to listen to the addiction audios.

They're a little longer though.

So they're about 25 minutes on average.

Okay.

Okay. We can continue to the next question.

Also, I saw Liz had another one. Was that a follow up from Liz?

I just sent you a private message.

Oh, okay.

Okay.

I just saw something pop up. So I want to make sure it.

Didn'T leave you hanging for me. So I didn't know.

Okay. Okay. All right, I'll take a look at that.

Says I haven't gotten completely rid of my psoriasis. What else can I do to make this happen?

So psoriasis is generally an autoimmune. In most cases it's connected to trauma. But it could also be a gut issue or could be a combination of a gut issue and psychological. So give it some time and keep working through. If you've got going through the program, still see what happens because you should start to notice some changes. If it's not changing with the program, it may be a gut issue. So it may be coming in. But I believe 80% of psoriasis cases are psychological. But you've got to sort of get through everything. We got to get the mind because it's a combination of gut and mind. But the mind gets balanced and then it'll start to balance the gut. So it may be that combination. You know, give it a little bit of time, but I think you'll see some changes. If not, then it's definitely 100% gut issue and then that could be treated differently.

Okay.

Next question. I guess I know how you say that we cannot self sabotage. But every time I get closer to my goals, I tend to do things that pull me away from them. I'm not doing that on purpose, but it's definitely a pattern. Why does it happen and how do I overcome it?

That's a great question. Because a lot it's sort of counter what people say all the time. They hear this word, I sabotage myself. And I say, if you understood the science of the brain, that brain can't do that. It's focused on your survival. It will never hurt you or sabotage you. It will try to protect you and stop pain. So the reason why you continue to do that is your mind is fearful of something. It's trying to divert you and move you in another direction to avoid eventual pain. Because you may have had some experiences with it. So it may sound really silly, but there's a. It is true. Some people may be afraid of success. Like all of a sudden success could bring a whole bunch more responsibility. There could be a lot of things that come along with success. So you'll think, oh, I really want success now. What part of your brain wants success? The conscious mind that uses reason and logic and it says, oh, wouldn't it be really great if I had a lot more money, I could do more things, I could buy a bigger house, I could vacation. All those things sound really great. But subconsciously your mind may say, but doesn't that also what's our experience with money? What's our experience with success? And it may have created pain. So your mind may want to say, don't go there because it's going, you're going to get hurt. So I use a funny story, which is sort of an easy one to. To see how it could work. You take a teenager, a young man, he's in high school, he's at a school dance, and there's a really pretty girl across the room that he wants to go and ask to dance. So he's trying to stand there and get up the nerve to go over and ask her to dance. And so his. His nervous system is completely out of control, but he really wants it subconsciously, he wants to go and ask this girl. And so he gets up the nerve to start walking across the floor. And as he's walking across the floor, he sees Billy over in the corner. And then he goes, oh, I should go talk to Billy first before I go talk to her. Did he sabotage himself or was his mind protecting him? Even though he really wants to talk to her? Consciously, his subconscious says that could be a lion that could rip your throat out, right, and tear you apart. Because what happens if she says no and now you have to walk all the way across that floor again and everybody knows you just got rejected and so you don't fit into the tribe anymore. It goes back to really that much of our survival brain of a thousand years ago. A thousand years ago, if you didn't fit into the tribe, you died. If the tribe excommunicated you, you died. So our minds still have those primitive instincts and it will do whatever it has to do to protect you. And the other thing that's really important, and you've learned this through the program, is the subconscious operates when now. Everything for the subconscious is now. It cannot see consequences to actions because everything is a solution now. So that's what I talk about with addiction. When people get into addiction, I say, when you take that needle or you take that drink or you take that drug, when does the pain stop? Now, isn't that exactly what the subconscious was trying to do, protect you from the pain? And did it work? Yes. And when did it work? Immediately. So you got the immediate relief. Can your subconscious mind has no connection to time, See a consequence to that? No, it's just the solution to the problem now. And it solved it. The conscious mind can do that, can think of, well, this isn't good for me. I shouldn't be doing this. So just the way you phrase that question, I don't understand why I'm sabotaging myself. Because logically it makes no sense. But subconsciously it does make sense. You just need to find out what is your mind fearful of. And I've given all kinds of different examples of it, even to the point of which is a hard subject to talk about. But suicide, When I talk to people who said, oh, you know, I'M thinking about committing suicide. Suicide's not about death. Suicide's about pain. They can't solve the problem. They haven't been able to come up with a solution. So suicide sounds like a solution because when do they want the pain to stop? Now. Suicide stops the pain now, and it can't see a consequence to this action. Right. And so suicide, if you understand what suicide's all about, suicide's about trying to stop pain. And. And I've told the story, you know, multiple times about, I think the German.

Snipers sniper that I wrote. I found this article just out of the. Out of the blue. And this he talked about in World War II when they fought against the Russians. The Russians didn't have a lot of weapons, but they had a lot of people. So they would charge at the German lines, the German snipers would shoot them, and then somebody else would run, pick up the weapon and keep running. And then the sniper said, we figured out a way to stop them. He says, I shot them in the stomach. I didn't kill them. So now they're lying on the ground screaming in pain. The next Russian is not that excited about running out and picking up a weapon and being in that kind of pain. They would rather die than to be in pain. That's how powerful pain messaging is. So if a thought comes in, obviously we don't want this to be coming in because that thought's not beneficial. It may be appealing and it may be possible. Do you see where the three come in? Right. So the idea is, is suicide beneficial? No. Is it appealing? Yes. Is it possible? Yes. But it didn't meet all three criteria. So it's a very interesting way to look at what pain does. And then how do people solve their pain? They'll do something. They'll create a habit, a behavior, a code to stop the pain. Suicide is a thought. Doesn't mean somebody wants to commit suicide just because they have the thought. I can think about jumping 20ft in the air. I can't do it, but I could have. The thought doesn't mean I'm going to do it because it's not possible. It would be beneficial and it would be really appealing because I'd be in the NBA, maybe the shortest NBA player, but I would be in the NBA. So.

So to go back to the sabotage stuff, let's take a very common example. People trying to lose weight or, you know, exercise or something. And then there's some progress. And we tend to celebrate, you know, what, or. Or eat food that you shouldn't Be eating or, you know, you're making progress, and then all of a sudden you just kind of fall back into the old behaviors, which basically is sabotaging your. Your goals and the progress. So how would you explain that? What in the subconscious says this is bad for you?

So it could be an. Again, this is a really interesting distinction. Is it sabotage or discipline?

Right. So that could be another factor in it. I'm just not disciplined enough to do it. So you may have to work on discipline. But if we want to put it into the sabotage category, it could be that if I lose this weight, and this happens a lot with women right now, all of a sudden you become very attractive. And that may bring unwanted attention. And if you've had a lot of experience with unwanted attention, your mind may be protecting you from that. And so that sounds like, how could that. That doesn't make any sense to the conscious mind. That doesn't make sense to the subconscious mind. Is going to protect you from the lions, right? So we've all heard of fight, flight or freeze, right? Freeze is actually a very good defense mechanism in the animal world. So the zebra that sees a lion, the lion is looking for the slowest zebra. So if I don't move, I don't get picked up by the reticular activating system of the zebra. He doesn't notice the zebra that's not running.

So that freeze mode is a very good way to protect yourself in the animal world. That could also be the problem is you get stuck and frozen because you're trying to protect yourself. And it happens a lot.

There was a lady on a plane that was being assaulted when she fell asleep. And this is a few years ago. Anybody heard the story? And so she wakes up and she realizes this guy's assaulting her. She doesn't do anything, and she froze. And then after she got off the plane, she then starts to go get help. And a lot of people were questioning, well, that makes no sense. Why wouldn't she just yell and scream on the plane? The passenger, somebody would see it. You got flight crew. She couldn't. She probably had experienced that much younger in her life. And only way she could protect herself was to close her eyes and just get it over with, right? And freeze. And that instinct is very powerful. So it's all about protection. That's why I say it's in pot. So all of that would look like, well, did she sabotage herself and let her be assaulted? Not according to her subconscious. It was protecting her. If I fight back, I get hurt. I May even get killed. So she's not going to fight back because the memory of those assaults, maybe when she was 5 or 6, come back and how did she, how did she defend herself then? She couldn't fight, she couldn't run. She just had to freeze. Does that make sense?

Yeah.

Yeah, absolutely. So we have another question that says. Well, Helen is adding to this asking. So Dr. Wood, would you say to a self sabotager to journal the pain that pulled them away from the goal?

Yeah. Identify what is the pain. Because if you resolve the pain, you'll resolve. Right. The what we. I'm not calling sabotage, but the, the direction, the change of direction. Right. So if you don't identify what your mind is protecting you from, you may not realize what it is. So then it just continues to run. It's a program. So if you write the program that success equals pain, success equals more responsibility.

Use this in if you. Any parents out there who have any children where you've got failure to launch. Have you ever heard of that? Failure to launch. The children just never grow up and they just never leave. They just don't, they don't never escape the nest. And so they can't launch. And so that's coming from. I like being in the nest. I like getting fed every day. I don't want to take the responsibility of paying my bills and working every day. So they just stay in. And a failure to launch, are they sabotaging themselves? Yeah, you would say, that's what most people would say. But something happened in their life to create the fear of having to take on all the responsibility of paying bills. And so there's. That's freeze.

Wonderful. So I think everybody here agrees we don't even use terms self sabotage. It's impossible.

Right.

Okay, we have a question from Lauren. Do you have thoughts about the relationship of intermittent fasting or diet related staying balanced and stable emotionally? This will be linked in with nutrients that support or deter, et cetera.

Yes. Intermittent fasting is phenomenal to do. So it can really make a big change in your system because a lot of people are dealing with insulin resistance and they don't know that it's a hormonal kind of issue. So the system just get. And that's. Even stress can create that. So if you, if you have a lot of stress, you're going to build up cortisol. Well, there's nowhere for that cortisol to go. So it gets converted into glucose, which gets converted into fat. And so intermittent fasting basically is resetting the system. So You've got the hormones ghrelin and leptin. So ghrelin is basically the hormone to tell you to eat. And then you have leptin, which is telling you to. You're full. So if those hormones go out of balance, you really have to take a look at it. You may have to do something to reset the leptin receptors. The ghrelin receptors. I'm hungry all the time. Is because maybe the leptin receptors are not working, so it doesn't recognize when you're full. So intermittent fasting is a really good way to help with that. And so what it is, if anybody. It's something that we're going to be talking a lot more about. But it does create a lot of issues that you can solve a lot of stuff with.

Would you recommend a certain intermittent fasting protocol?

It's whatever sort of works for you. And again, you really want to sort of get tested because it may not be. It may be certain things that are better for you than other things. You want to find out what foods. Right. Tend to work better for you. So they have different diets, the Mediterranean diet, you know, different things that will work because you may be thinking, well, I'm eating right, I'm doing everything really well. Why am I not losing weight? Well, you may not be methylating. You may have insulin resistance. There could be a number of different things. So to getting tested for it. And there's all kinds of different things out there to sort of work on that. But we will definitely.

Help out with that in a little bit.

Perfect. We have another question from Liz. Liz, you have the mic?

Yeah, I did.

Thanks.

So I've been struggling with unnecessary guilt all my life.

That's number one. And furthermore, I'm having. I've been working through, through the process and I'm trying to see what is I trying to identify. I'm having trouble identifying the emotions that's associated with guilt.

And I don't know, I close my eyes and try to see where in the body does this guilt coming through or where is it affecting. But I'm still struggling with it and I have no idea where to start to address this thing that I'm feeling.

So guilt is actually an emotion and so what's the purpose of guilt? Religion learned this a long time ago. If we can make you feel guilty, we're going to do what. We're going to change your behavior. We're going to get you to do it the way we want to do it. So your mind is using guilt because it's trying to get something to be different. And guilt is a modifier. So something in your mind, your mind is not okay with and is trying to get changed. So it may be beneficial, it may be appealing, may be possible, but we need to find out where is the guilt coming from? Is it from something that you've done that your mind is not okay with? We just need to get an update. So it could be a glitch, an error message where your mind is saying, do that, Liz. Don't do that 20 years ago. Does that make sense? No. But your mind is still looping through something that went wrong.

Yeah. It's not. It's just unnecessary stuff. Like, you know, like. I don't know. I mean.

I'm trying to see what. When was the last time I felt guilty? You know, we have some guests in the house and they wanted to use the bathroom, but I wanted to sleep the late. So I was feeling bad that I didn't wake up early to accommodate that, you know, that, like, unnecessary guilt such as that.

No, I get that. That's a. You just explained that really well. So that's coming from being pleasing people.

Yes.

Right. You have a very strong tendency to want to please people. You don't want people to be uncomfortable, unhappy. That may be coming from some experiences you had earlier where you take on tremendous responsibility for other people's welfare. And so that sort of explained it perfectly. That's where the guilt's coming from, is, you know, make sure that everybody's okay. But can you do that? Is it necessary to do that? Not. Not really. What you need to do is take care of you, and then everybody else is better. Right. They're. They're responsible for them. You're responsible for you. But if you're better and you feel better, they're going to be better. But somehow, and. And it may be, you know, from earlier in your life that you had responsibility for something that was overwhelming and you took a lot of guilt on that. I need to take care of this. That's probably where it's coming from. So identify where it may have started.

Basically, going through. Identifying when it started. That initializing event would be really good if you could find it. When's the first time you felt that? When's the first time that you experienced something like that? And then go back to that and reset it.

And how would you reset something like that? Because I clearly remember when it started.

So it's going back through some of those processes that we did during the session. So we just may not have gotten to that one. So you may want to do the picture one, the movie theater one, but do it after you listen to the audios. Get into a very calm state before you try to reset it.

Okay, thank you.

Okay.

Great.

Okay. This is another question we received through email.

I completed the four hour videos about two weeks ago. I have been working my way through the audios. Prior to the TIP program, I had some anxiety and a handful of panic attacks. Last weekend I had a flight to take me to an abortion healing retreat across the country in California. I live in West Virginia. I never made it because I got on the plane and immediately experienced an extreme level of claustrophobia and anxiety and had to get off the plane. I experienced this before and found that I feel this way when I am flying by myself and away from my husband and three daughters. We fly to Florida as a family once a year and I always do fine on those flights. I was also trying to wean my 18 month old, so that added some additional stress. Appreciate any advice or guidance. Thank you.

So I'm assuming if you're going to an abortion retreat that you may have had an abortion at some point. So what your mind may, maybe you haven't resolved that in your mind. And that's where that, that kind of an emotion could come up that you need to resolve that that time in your life when you had the abortion. And it sounds like you've had other children. So if the abortion was before the other children or after the other children, it would be interesting to sort of figure out where that is. But that sounds like that's where it's coming from. And again, that's just on very surface information like that. But I would say if you just what you told me, if you were sitting in a session with me, I'd say let's take a look at what happened with the abortion and let's identify that and get that reset so it's not still running in the background.

You were also mentioning on one of your videos because this question mentions flying too. Like the current, like the stress around flying and the focus on the destination versus the travel.

Yeah. A lot of people who have fear of flying, they're so focused on, on getting on the plane and everything's all focused around that. So what you really want to do is focus on the destination, where you're going. So if somebody said, you know, I have to go, I have to fly from here to here, I would say what I want you to do is start imagining arriving, not flying. What are you going to do when you land, you're going to go pick up your bags from the turnstile, you're going to get into an Uber, you're going to go to your hotel, you're going to check into your hotel. Start visualizing after because then your mind is focused on after, not focused on the flight. And so that really helps change the way your mind's going to look at it because it's focusing on what you're afraid of, you don't want to focus on. So it's the same thing. If you were in a car and you got into a skid on ice and then you're heading towards trees, what do people do? They start focusing on the tree, right? That's not what you want to focus on. You want to focus on the opening between the trees. Because if you focus on the tree, your mind's going to move towards the tree. If you focus on the opening, your mind will figure the escape and get out of the opening. So if you focus on the flight, your mind's focused on the flight as opposed to why are you going on the flight in the first place? Because you're going to a destination.

Focus on what you want, which is the destination. The flight's just a path to get there.

Okay, we have a question in the chat. Can you connect the dots between avoiding pain and having a low self image that makes me feel like I do not deserve happiness or success?

So again, coming down to at some point there was an event or whatever that made you feel you don't deserve this?

It sounds sometimes really silly. It could be a very, very small event, an emotional concussion that sort of connected that up. Right. Or it could be a big T trauma that you saw a lot of. You know, maybe you grew up in wealth and you saw other people suffering and then that made like, I don't deserve this, I didn't earn this. Or your parents, it's a big thing for. When parents are very, very successful, they need to identify how to teach their kids to deal because it's a lot of pressure on a child to go, I'm never going to be able to do what my parents did. I mean, that looks overwhelming. You make it look easy now. And your child, it looks like they're climbing up, you know, Mount Everest. And so you need to identify that that's where it could be coming from, is that I'm live. And I'm just using this as an example. But, you know, I've got a nice home, I got a nice car, I've got But I really got it all from an inheritance or I didn't really earn it. And then that's going to affect your self esteem. It can come in from those kinds of things.

Okay.

Feel free to send follow up questions, guys, if you have any, I'll, I'll happily read them. Question. Is there a place to access the reset methods? Again? Yes, you can access.

If you did it digitally, you have access for 90 days. So you can go back in the, in the program and after you complete the audios to get yourself in alpha, you can complete one of the clearing techniques.

Okay.

Okay, there's another one. I completed the digital program a few months ago and saw my anxiety drop significantly. However, I recently had a really intense situation with claustrophobia. Ever since, it seems like my sensitivity to small spaces is heightened. What could be causing this? Do you have any advice on how to deal with it or specific part of the program to revisit?

Again, that sounds like something unresolved, maybe from earlier because you got everything else out of the way. This really small event from when you were younger. I'm using this as an example again, pops up. So if you had like three or four really big events in your life that had created the trauma, but then you had this little small event that could have been. I had a gentleman that remembered his brother holding him down all the time and they would pin him down and it created claustrophobia. And he never thought about that. They were horsing around, but his brother would hold him down right until, you know, and then finally let him up. But it was a panic because he felt like he couldn't breathe. He put a, you know, a pillow over him and hold him down. So it came to. Sometimes those kinds of situations they may not have seen as big. Maybe it was just one particular time, but now it pops up because everything else got taken out of the way, that result got resolved and that one wasn't resolved because it may not have been connected to any of the others.

And is the advice or this kind of like question for everybody who's watching the recording or people here? Like, if you're struggling with something that you want to reset or kind of go through, you don't want to go through the whole program again, but like do a few audios, get yourself in the proper mind state, then complete clearing techniques, because now you understand the theory behind it.

Exactly. Yep. But find the event that maybe is creating it that you may not have looked at before because you never really remembered it. And, and I give an example. I mean Even though I had a really great childhood, I had a. An old.

Event that popped up on me. I never liked to gamble. I never liked gambling. I never did. I mean, Bridget would ask me to go buy a lottery ticket. I go, no, I just don't. I don't like it. I never knew really why until this happened. This is actually a number of years ago. When I was younger, when I was 16, the pro who taught me how to play tennis, he was a hustler. He gambled all the time, and so he was always doing that. And so he was playing at a match, and I was sort of his protege. And he went to this match, and I didn't know that he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. And so he was really struggling. So as he was going to play the match against this other pro, and there was a lot of money on it, he got. And he never did. He was very, very zen. But he got really angry and said, this is a waste of my time. You couldn't. You couldn't even beat Don. And so I'm 16 years old. He brings me into the match to play against this pro. And so. And he goes all. All the same money, my same thousand dollars, he says, and I'm going to throw in all my rackets on top of it. He says, one set, right? And he had a couple thousand dollars worth of rackets, and he'd never done anything like this. And I thought, this is a different hustle. I never saw this one. And so I'm winning four games to three, and he brings me over to the fence, and he starts getting mad at me and says, stop bleeping around. Finish this guy. Finish this guy off. There's a lot more than my thousand dollars riding on this match. All the people from the clubs were all there. There was a big betting game, and I lost the next three games. And then we were out playing golf. And every time you play golf, everybody likes to bet. I never like to bet. I found I never played very well when I bet. So I just said this one day. I said, I'm not going to bet today. I don't want to be involved. I'm just playing. And so I'm playing really well. We're on the 13th hole, and the guy playing with us, he says, and Brandon was playing with us, he said. He says, you know, I think you really do play better when you don't bet. And then Brandon said to me, he says, yeah, my dad doesn't like losing money. And all of a sudden, that scene of him in my face at the fence and I felt this, like my stomach just went. And it was flashback. I lost everybody's money in the bet and I took over his job. So I lost my mentor. I only saw him one more time ever. And it was in a institute and he just disappeared off the face of the earth and I took over his job. That's how I became a tennis pro. And so all that connection to gambling and the losses, right. Even though I never remembered that, that's what popped up when Brandon said that. So obviously that's what created my dislike of gambling because it cost me something very powerful.

That's a really interesting story. Wow. I mean, great. Kind of cool that it happened.

I was actually, I came home, I said to Bridget, I said, I got some good news, I got a trauma, I found something.

But it was powerful for a 16 year old kid to lose. And not only that, everybody at the club was mad at me because they all lost their money. I mean, it was bad. It was really bad. So you can see why when somebody.

Says, what did he do to a kid?

He shouldn't have done it. But then within a month he was in the institute for a nervous breakdown. And so I started, I didn't notice it because I was 16. He was starting to change a little bit gradually and he started just talking a little bit weird and you know, and then it, then he cracked. So.

But this isn't me. The whole beauty of understanding atmospheric conditions, like once you understand what, what happened, it's hard to be angry about it. Doesn't mean you let him off the hook. But like you get, you get your piece from understanding why it happened.

Well, he never lost.

Right.

He played every pro in the city. He beat every pro handily. He would even give them. I mean, he was the best player I ever saw. And what I didn't know is that right before that, like two weeks before that, he played in a tournament and lost to one of the best 18 year olds in the country. And he was like in his late 30s, almost 40. And I think his age like hit him. And so I think he panicked and he thought, I can't lose to this other pro. Everybody's never seen me lose. So he throws me in thinking I could maybe win. It was better than him losing.

Right, so that's a good story. Okay, so we have five more minutes and we have more questions to go through. So instead of doing the pain management on the session on the webinar, I'm actually going to just keep going with the Questions because I want to make sure everybody gets their answer. And then as a reminder, you all have access to these audios within your Tip Today app. If you don't have it already, you can download it from either iOS store or Android Store if you're Team Android like I am.

Okay, so question, there's also, I saw something about sleep. There's some sleep audios in there as well. So listen to some of those if you want some help with sleep.

Yes. So that was a question from Liz. How to work through insomnia. Sleep audios will be great for that.

How can I build self confidence and resilience in my daughter?

Really good question. So a lot of that is they may be. It could be home life where they're mirroring maybe your insecurities without you realizing it. How are you handling the situations? And I've talked about this, this is really powerful. When there's a school shooting, these children end up with post traumatic stress, obviously from the school shooting. But what they're discovering is that most of the post traumatic stress is coming from when they see their parents for the first time after the shooting. Their parents falling apart, screaming, crying. And so the child is looking for, am I safe? And they see that and then they don't feel safe. So what I say is take a look at your own behavior and how you're demonstrating self esteem. Right? I'm not saying that is the issue, but also take a look at it because if you show some of that lack of confidence in situations that could be having an effect on them and then at the same time find things that starts to build up, what are they good at? So they may be doing a lot of things. For example, school. Some people just are not great at school. And school continues to reinforce that you're not very smart, which is not true. You may not be very good at what they're trying to teach you, but it doesn't mean you're not good or you're not smart. My wife Bridget was a perfect example. She grew up believing that she would. When I met her, she's 18, she says, I'm not a very good student. And I was like, why? Right. Well, she's got a father telling her she's stupid all the time. She has teachers that are reinforcing it. So she can't focus in school. So she's struggling in school because she's in fight or flight constantly. And that had nothing to do with intelligence. It had to do with the environment. And she said to me one time, she looked at My report card. She goes, well, school was so easy for you. I went, well, yeah, of course it was easy for me. I didn't have to worry about what happened to me last night. I don't have to worry what's going to happen when dad shows up at home. I said, you had nowhere to land. You were in constant flight. And so.

The parents have a major. And this is the next book that I'm going to publish is Don't Mess with My DNA is to specifically talk about that is the importance of how do you respond to things. And I give all kinds of examples. My dad was the coolest guy under pressure. I don't know how he did it, but he did it. One time he said, let's take the boat out. And he says, if you want to bring your friend, we're going to go out in the lake and go, you know, go boating. And my dad used to be in the Navy, so he's very comfortable around water. And I'd never seen this. We went out there and this huge storm came out of nowhere. I mean, the sky went black, the waves were going up way over the boat. You couldn't even see over it. And I still remember my dad just showing us how to ride in this kind of a storm. He says, you don't go straight into the wave. You go across the wave. And that felt scary because you're going across the wave on an angle. He says, but you have to go up and then you go down. He says, but if you try to go into it, you can flip the boat. And so he's showing us, and then even during that, he's got me steering the boat and showing me how to do it. So if you can demonstrate to your children how to handle those kinds of situations, man, you will change their lives. So find situations that you can show them how to build their own self confidence and build their own self esteem and demonstrate it, but do things that they like and that they love and show them how they can accomplish anything because the world's not going to do that to them. The world didn't do that to Bridget. But I grew up in that kind of a home. I had the luxury of my parents always reinforcing right that safety to me.

And. And again, you want to make say.

That because a lot of the, you know, a lot of the media, books, popular things will tell, you know, you gotta prepare them for, for the world. But what does that exactly mean? You know, like it doesn't mean being tough on them and making their life more Complicated. Preparing them with giving them this like security, safe place to land on so that whatever they meet in the world, they're still okay.

So the world's going to beat them up. They've got to have a safe place to come home that you can then tell them that they're safe, right? Make that feeling of safety and take them through that. And you know, that would happen, you know, all the time with me, like, why did this happen? Why did that happen? My parents would talk to me about it. They'd say, you know, I understand, you know, this is how things happen. They, they didn't shield me from the world's going to be a tough place, but they created that sense of safety in my own home. So I felt like at least I'm a warrior going out with a shield. At least I know I'm going to defend myself, right? And then if I did get, you know, something did happen, I'd come back. And they didn't rush out to protect me. They just told me how I should be handling that. Because, you know, first you're thinking, you know, dad, go out and beat that guy up for me. And it's like, well, no, you have to learn how to fight yourself, right? And so that's what we did. We learned how to fight ourselves, protect ourselves. So the, the parents are the number one resource and the, the mistake a lot of people say is, well, my dad was really tough on me and so that's what I do is I'm really tough and I, you know, on my kid. Well, that's not the, I, I, my personal feeling is that's not the best way.

The best way is the world's going to be tough on them, you need to guide them. And so, and be that, that voice of reason, that voice of comfort, right? And that, and that's what my, my parents were. So we would, we would talk a lot about things and, and I learned a lot, but they would, you know, obviously protect me as well. My mom, I've told the story about, you know, two of the teachers at our school were sexually abusing kids. And when I was in elementary school, I came home, said, oh, Mr. Bloom wants to take all of us to the gym or to the Y on Saturday to go swimming. And my mom goes, no. And I go, but why not? Everybody's going. She goes, everybody but you, you're not going. And she goes, I don't understand why. Yeah, I don't understand why a 45 year old man wants to hang around with kids that aren't his that just didn't make. She goes, so no, I'm not letting you go. She was amazing. Yeah. And she didn't do it mad, she didn't do it angry. She didn't say, you know, she just said, no, I'm not comfortable with it. Just all matter of fact. And it wasn't an argument. And my dad always said, he says, you can disagree with me anytime you want. And he says, and I'll listen to you as long as you're respectful. And so that's how we learned how to communicate. We didn't yell and scream at each other. We communicated. And then my dad would then go, nope or yes, or you persuaded me, that sounds like a good idea. But he would always listen. But as long as I was respectful. So that's how I learned to communicate.

I might have borrowed that sentence with my kids, which was respectful. Yeah, exactly. We're using that with my five year old now because that kid will try to negotiate everything and anything with you. So as long as it doesn't include whining and you're being respectful again, can we can talk about it? But interesting, you mentioned how people say, you know, like, I'm being tough on you. I've read this really interesting thought in the book. It says that a lot of times we're trying to justify our traumas by finding correlation or thinking it's a correlation with where we are today. So for example, I wouldn't be as successful as I am if my parents were hard, harsh on me. But that's all we're doing. We're justifying the, you know, difficult experiences we went through because our mind needs craves that resolution. And there's no proof that you wouldn't be even better if there was no harsh situations at homes and you were, you know, embraced with love.

I, I totally agree with that. And, and again, people can be super successful in their lives even if they had tough childhoods. Doesn't mean a tough childhood precludes you from being successful in life. But my belief is that you have another gear and until that trauma is resolved, it's going to be hard to get to that next gear. And so I hear it all the time, people just say, yeah, my dad was tough on me, my mom was tough on me, and that's a shame because it's tough to grow up like that, which is what Bridget grew up with. She grew up with no sense of safety.

And then I come along and she starts to see my world and she's just like, wow, I would love to have lived in your world. Right. But she couldn't. It wasn't possible. But she still became a great mom.

So that didn't mean that she wasn't going to take those bad experiences and turn them on her kids.

No. And if anyone has met Bridget, like for those of you who haven't, she is the star of the show. Once you meet Bridget, you don't see Dr. Wood at all. Like, I felt completely under her as well. Totally huge fan. Okay, so I know we're a little bit of time, but we got a few more questions so I'm just gonna, let's answer this one that came in chat and then if anybody has any follow up questions, please send them via email and we'll respond. Or obviously we can always do that on the next call as well. But we have a question that says are there instances where trauma cannot be resolved? Is there a point where it's too late?

Never. I'm going to do the Winston Churchill. Never. Never ever.

Exactly.

Never give up. Everything's resolvable. Right. And so, yeah, don't ever think that that's impossible to do. We just have to get, I mean.

Even from science perspective, you know, the, the concept of neuroplasticity says that we can change the way our brain is wired no matter how old we are and where we are in life.

That's one of the misconceptions that they thought for a long time that the brain stops changing and loses plasticity. And they're finding out that is not true at all. It's the opposite. And we proved with this. The next study that we're going to publish is that we got a 45% change in brain plasticity when we resolve trauma. That's the ability. The brain's brilliant. We're just beginning to understand and tap into its abilities and what it can do. We, and this is what, you know, tip is all about is to try to help you maximize right. Your potential and find, you know, what, what you need to get to your next gear.

I love this, like final question is a, we leave it off with hope. Like that's, that's, you know, it's never too late. So thank you everyone for joining again. If you have any additional questions, do send them in. I just shared link for the Unshackled workshop happening tomorrow night. It is a free workshop if you want to attend. See a bit more of Dr. Wood live and, and then amazing Michael Guerrero with him. Just register and you'll get all your stuff in your inbox. And yeah, that's it. We will see you again next Thursday. And thank you everyone who joined us. Sorry. Next. Next Thursday. Next month. Last Thursday of the month.

Very good.

Thanks, everybody. Great seeing you.

Thank you, Les. Glad it was helpful.

Thank you. Have fun and be well.

You too. Take care, John.

Thanks, John. You too.