Doug NollI'm called in when human dynamics are getting in the way of strategic leadership execution.

Jay Gruben's testimonial #videoshort

9 Dec 2025 · 1 min

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This content was created by Doug Noll. This content was uploaded by Doug Noll. This is a YouTube video titled "Jay Gruben's testimonial #videoshort" (uploaded December 9, 2025). It contains a first-person testimonial by Jay Gruben describing an intense 18-week period with another person (Lindsay) in which using affect labeling and related emotional-regulation tools prevented violent outcomes. The excerpt discusses survival responses, vulnerability, impatience, and how applying those techniques de‑escalated conflict rather than leading to harm.

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shook me. I think it shook Lindsay. But I gotta say that in this moment of survival, if we didn't have your tools and we didn't utilize affect labeling, there would have been a murder. She'd have killed me or I'd have killed her through this 18-week period. And I, I, like, I'm not, I'm not trying to be a brown-noser here. I'm, I'm telling you, we'd have killed each other. And what happened instead? What happened instead was There is a lot of talk about emotion and, you know, it— there's a lot of understanding about impatience and vulnerability. And, you know, even though we were affect labeling each other, there was still a disconnect because she was in her survival and I was in my survival, but no violent reactions took place, which is incredible.