Women peer mediators in the Prisoners of Peace program teach inmates conflict resolution to reduce violence. They describe how inmates open up to peers rather than guards, leading to lasting resolutions and measurable drops in violence across prison yards. The mediators find purpose in helping others navigate high-emotion conflicts through empathy and active listening.
Chapters
We started this to teach a group of women how to be mediators because we were asked to come in to help them learn this skill so that they could reduce the violence in their community. We didn't expect what we ended up with here. Amazing. They're where they are for a reason, and what we're trying to do is help them live a better life where they are and serve humanity in whichever way they're called to do, as peacemakers if they're called to do.
I truly believe that living in a peaceful environment is safer for everybody involved.
Being able to approach people in a situation where you have high emotions and a lot of conflict going on, anger especially, and being able to step into that and not take it on myself and help them resolve the situation by making their own choices is totally empowering, and it sets the stage stage for creating understanding, compassion, and empathy between individuals.
It's very important because sometimes we have narrow tunnel vision and we look at things from our perspective, and that's not how you do it. You have to empathize with others. Put yourself in their shoes.
In this atmosphere, it's easier to speak to a peer than it would be to speak to an officer. Because their job first and foremost is safety and security. We don't have that job. Our job is merely to listen, reflect, and help you come to some sort of agreement. And when a person actually sits down with you and says, you know, "I'm glad that you sat and you listened to me. I just needed to get it out." We're like a sounding board. So it assists them in hearing what it is they want us to understand, because sometimes a lot of us We don't speak from our interior, we speak from our exterior. And our exterior is usually not what we want to get across, it's something a lot deeper. So once we get to that point, it makes that flow of communication so much easier and it resolves a lot of conflict.
You actually take the time to listen to somebody, even if they may be rambling on to you. Once you hear what that person really has to say and really acknowledge it and is aware of it, the resolution comes. Because you don't actually know what the problem is if you don't know— you can't resolve a problem if you don't know what it really is. So sometimes it could be something really minute and it's not really you, something deeper within that person. And it helps resolve a problem. Maybe we can't come to agreement with it, but we can come to terms with it. And be okay.
I use every tool to my disposal to help de-escalate situations, and if I have an inmate who has skills in mediation and negotiation and conflict resolution and peacemaking, I'm going to call upon that inmate to help me resolve the issues.
I can't give you the detail of that mediation only because of the confidentiality that I promised them. But I can say this, it was rough. It was not, didn't take no damn 10 minutes. It took hours because I was like, that's when I really needed Laurel and Doug, 'cause I'm like, oh my God, how am I gonna say this? So I kept doing like, okay, well, if you guys do this, just know these are the consequences. I cannot tell you what to do. It made me feel good that They walked away talking without needing me because I was taught by Laurel and Doug that once they, the two people who were in a conflict, if they're able to settle it amongst themselves because I helped without me having to get the credit, then that's what really counts. So it made me feel good.
We were called by staff. It was very spur of the moment. So we went in really cold. We didn't have a chance to meet with them and convene. Staff just called for us, and when we got there, they told us what was going on. And we sat down, and as soon as we sat down, I knew it was going to be a process. It wasn't something that was going to happen real quick. And we ended up going back once a week for about a month. And in digging, having them dig into the problems, what the issue first started out as ended up not being the issue at all. And it was exciting because when it clicked with them, it was like, "Wow!" And we had them draw— we drew up a contract and we had them sign it, and it's been okay so far.
We're not supposed to prompt or give advice, or we're supposed to let them solve their own problems. Well, when it got quiet, it was a little bit uncomfortable for me, so I said, "Well, sir, what would you suggest for her since there are no options on the table and she doesn't know and we're trying to keep her calm?" And so it was a little awkward because of the authority, you know, and you never want to overstep your boundaries, but at the same time I knew that He was receptive to what Prison of Peace is doing.
What I really learned during that process is that for the first time I really saw that there are some serious mental health issues in this prison, and I had to struggle really hard to figure out how I was going to deal with those situations when they came up because I had it sitting right in front of me. And so when I was able to recognize that this person really, you know, 30 years ago would have been in a mental hospital somewhere, not in a prison, how was I going to deal with that? How was I going to facilitate the process so that this person could be an active part of the mediation process? And when it came down to it, just convening with her, just listening to the things that she had to say. I ended up spending 3 hours convening with her one night, and it was an experience for her where it was the first time in her entire life that she'd ever had anybody Take the time to hear her and listen to her and show compassion and be able to show her that I wanted to hear her story and what she had to And that was a life-altering experience for her and for me.
We've reached a lot of women. We've, um, the program has grown. We're out on, we started on Delta, on D Yard, and the program is on every yard now. We, we It's multicultural. We reach every— it's now in Spanish, so we reach everybody.
As a result of Prisoners of Peace, throughout the institution, I have observed officers utilizing us more to actually be their liaison when there is sometimes heated conflict.
We can deal with the inmate behavior, but sometimes we can't prevent the inmate behavior. Somebody in a, in a role as a mediator can often prevent or de-escalate a situation. We generally clean things up, but to have somebody proactively prevent it is a tool that I think we all could use.
My unit alone, there's so much more peace because of the staff utilizing the mediators to resolve things. I've had 4 women come to me with the concern that they had when they actually only needed tools to be able to listen and reflect on what someone else had to say.
With this, less— there's less violence here, less misunderstanding, and you're able to actually communicate and not be barbaric. Regardless of what somebody may think of you, at least I know, I understand now.
Peace is exciting because I'm giving something back to my community. Although I'm in these, behind these walls, this is still my community. And if I can resolve some of the things within my community, imagine how much peace I can take outside of my community. Yeah, I'm excited.
