How to avoid a Sexless Marriage

Did you know that over 80% of married couples struggle with intimacy because of poor communication and lack of new things or novelty? Discover how to revive the spark in your relationship in this episode. As part of the 20% living in a sexless marriage, only 7% are actually enjoying sex weekly. Do you know that about 6, 7% of married couples have sex less than once a week? And if you have sex less than 10 in a year, then you are in a sexless marriage? Are you in a sexless marriage? Communication and sex education are key to great sex. Did you know that while marriage can become quickly difficult due to distractions such as finances, kids, work, house, and maybe even medical condition, after you've been married for a while, there's a hormone that's called pea. It is a chemical that's responsible for the euphoria and the surprise and the good feeling when meeting someone that you're sexually interested in. But over time in a marriage, that goes down making it kind of like not as novel and not as interesting as it was when you were dating. So having said that, communication is key in a marriage in addition to sex. But sex tend to diminish over time because of other things in a marriage. So married couples are having less sex now more than ever. And women falsely believe that sexual interest come before activity, meaning they think that they need to be aroused, they need to be feeling, they need to have sex before they have sex. But actually the opposite is true, that when they're involved in the sexual activity, their interest and desire increases. It takes some time. Now women takes a little bit longer time than men to get desire and arousal approximately about between 15 to 20 minutes. So that's an interesting thing to know guys, is that women tend to take a little bit longer to get into it and that they may not be into it when they have sex, but when you guys start doing foreplay and you start doing into the act, and she'll get more aroused as well too. But the sad part is that people in sexless marriages are turning to other alternative or leave the marriage. That there are 50% of marriage that get divorced and that usually things not going right between about probably 40s to mid-50s, which is around the same age that your body changed in hormones. For men, your testosterone hormones start to decline after the age of 35. And for women, their hormones start to decline line around even as early as 40s. So you have hormonal changes, you have kids, work, family life on top of that. And then you have not having frequency and sex. And then if you're not communicating, it really compounds that. So I find it fascinating that divorce rate its highest between 40s to 50s and and that's when also where hormonal changes are as well. And unfortunately now cheating is more accessible due to technology, dating site, porn site and just hook up at this point. So historically marriage has been an institution in the 1800 as way of acquiring in laws, property and wealth. But now it's really for relationship and romantic love. And women nowadays are financially stable, they're educated as well. So marriage for them is not for financial stability and it's really about romantic love, relationship, communication. So having said that, how do you revive a sexless marriage? Pay more attention to your spouse, put that phone away, spend time and talking with them the old fashioned way. I don't know about you, but I was raised in period. There was no calculator, no cell phone and in fact, well, we had computer, but I didn't have access to a computer at that time. When I was in college, I was still typing on electric typewriter and I don't even have access to a computer. But it forces me to do when I get married, 1993 was to pay attention, pay more time and communicate with my husband. I didn't have the cell phone to distract me, I didn't have Netflix to distract me, I didn't have Amazon to distract me. And I didn't really get to use the Internet until probably after I even got married because I didn't get access to a computer until I was like maybe 30. So sex is healthy and can be enjoyed well into old age. And so we need to know that vasette with your partner cannot be replaced by technology to pay attention, communicate with your spouse and spice up your marriage. How do you spice up your marriage? Try new bedroom activity like having sex in different rooms in the house and have fantasy to spike up your sex life and maybe go out on a weekend to a hotel or to a nearby city and spend time with each other and. And sometime spending time with each other and just reviving that relationship. The reason why you fell in love and being able to just kind of be next to that person again, to kind of get back to kissing and touching and intimacy as well too. So believe it or not, studies have shown that people in marriages experience loneliness, miscommunication, especially when they're not having enough sex. Now I know that a marriage is more than just sex. There's communication and love, but sex is an important part of that as well too. And so when you are not communicating, you're not spending time with each other, you're not having sex. It actually can increase stress and we know that stress will lead to low hormone, will lead to weight gain, will lead to high blood pressure, and having said, that will also lead to heart disease. So have sex and have sex often because it can be good for your health, because it lowers your stress, it bring you closer to your partner and will lead you to have more time with your partner. And I've been married for 31 years and oftentimes we just sit there together with one another and just don't really talk and read and just being there with each other. We still hold hands and we still do a lot of things together and we definitely do not meet the criteria for sexless marriage. And I hope you don't either. What's the criteria for sexless marriage? Less than 10 in a year. Having said that, I hope you enjoyed the episode. I thought I'd do something different about a sexless marriage and I hope that you like and subscribe and leave a comment on the channel. I love to hear from you and just know that we're creating a sexual revolution together. We are empowering men and women to have sexual confidence and join me in the Modern Man Club where I will lead you to sexual confidence and enjoying sex in your marriage again. So join me in the Modern man club@noedman.com I'll see you in the next episode. Are you struggling and frustrated in finding a solution for ed? Well, I have just the thing for you. It's called the Modern Man Club led by yours truly, Dr. Ann. Together we're redefining male sexuality and embracing a holistic approach to overcoming ED without medication or surgery. I will provide a protective environment for community and proven strategy to overcoming ed. It is a safe place. Expert coaching by me and my team. We provide holistic approach to overcoming ED and an empowering community of men with ED supporting one another and lots and lots of educational resources. Visit mensexualityclub.com at the link here on my right and connect with us and reclaim control over your sexual health. I'll see you there.

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