The Secret Connection Between Porn and Erectile Dysfunction | with Dr. Trish Leigh

Hello there modern man. Today I'm excited to have our guest, Dr. Trish Lee. She is a brain Health and Sex Edition recovery coach at the long term for essentially she helped you get out of porn and get out of your stuck being inside your head and to move on forward so that way you can have a good sex life. So let's just dive into it. Welcome Trish and thank you for being with us.

Thanks for having me. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited to dig in for sure.

Okay, so let's kind of dive in. What happened when you watch too much porn?

So we know from this isn't my opinion. So first of all, I'm the messenger. We know from a lot of science that what happens is that porn is highly addictive. Most people do not recognize that. So it's very addictive in the sense that it changes the way that the brain performs and, and makes it so that your brain depends on higher levels of dopamine. When most people find porn when they're young, in adolescence, and actually in childhood these days because porn is in everybody's pocket now where back in the day it wasn't. So what happens is adolescents find porn when they're young and it changes the way that the brain functions, makes it need more dopamine. First it's to feel good. Ultimately it's to not feel bad. And you know, the addiction exists on a continuum of use, misuse, abuse, compulsion, and compulsion leads to addiction. A lot of people don't know that they have an addiction and they say, how do I know if I have an addiction? Try to stop, see what happens. And for many people, it's very difficult. They cannot stop without a formula or systematic professional help. So ultimately it rewires the brain to need dopamine. Porn's a super normal stimulus. It gives your brain lots of dopamine and it keeps you stuck in the loop.

Okay, so I have two questions related to that. Is one, how much porn before it becomes addictive?

That's a good question. Unfortunately it doesn't have a solid answer because of course there's so many other variables besides just how much. So the way I always talk about it is frequency, consistency and intensity. The more you have of those three things, the worse of an issue you're usually going to have. Because what it means is you're frequently, consistently going back for much higher levels of dopamine than say, someone who's watching very low level pornography one time a week. But what I can tell you is science shows that even at one Time a week. The negative ramifications from porn show up in people's lives. And I can just tell you really quickly, and we can dive into what it is, but basically creates mental and physical health issues. So people have cognitive thinking issues. They will have increased anxiety, depression, brain fog, and then, of course, erectile dysfunction.

Okay, so I wanted to kind of revisit that later. So your answer is really more. Is that the consistency? You do it on a regular basis. You find that intensity. Intensity meaning what? Meaningful? How long you watch or what does that mean?

It can be both, actually, but usually in porn sites aren't stupid. They have. Porn is set up to capitalize on this. The idea that where you need to click on tabs in. In the margin to be able to cross moral boundaries, or porn that includes violence, porn that includes pieces that also make you anxious. So a lot of people find that they'll click into a new genre that makes them a little bit uncomfortable because then they will get higher levels of dopamine from it. So intensity usually has to do with the sexual acts, the genres, those types of things. It also can be going back frequently without orgasm, which is called edging. And when people do that, then you're basically letting your brain linger in a heightened dopamine state, which is shown to desensitize the reward center and the reward pathways. And that desensitization in the brain is what ultimately leads to changes in baseline arousal in the brain, which lead to sexual arousal dysfunction.

Right. I like the way how you explained that. So if you just watch porn for like a month, can you get addicted versus, like when you watch it for a year?

Yeah. Science shows that after two exposures, the brain has changed from homeostasis to neo homeostasis, new homeostasis with the need for heightened levels of dopamine. So the way I talk about it is that in first exposure, basically the seeds of addiction are planted when you go back a second time, you ultimately need more dopamine in the second time. So, like, those levels have already calibrated within the first one to two sessions of porn. And then again, remembering too. Like, there are a lot of variables, so it's difficult to nail it down. But the variable that I have in mind is age of exposure too. Because the younger the brain is, the less developed it is. Without getting into all the science behind it, it's impacted more because it hasn't developed yet. And I don't love the way that this one study that's very popular is characterized in the news. But what it'll say is that porn stunts brain development. I don't love that. That's kind of like hyperbole, you know, stunts brain development. But it's actually true in a sense because it kind of freezes the brain in this underdeveloped state, this neo homeostasis. It becomes neuro rigid instead of neuroplastic. And neuroplastic is what allows our brains to change and to improve over time when we're doing all the right things. But in this neuro rigid mode, it keeps the brain going back to porn for more interesting.

So if I interpret it correctly, the younger you are when you start with porn, I guess chance of addiction versus if you were older, I would say.

Yes, but it's one of the variables. So like if you watch porn when you're young, but then you don't water those seeds of addiction over time because the seeds of addiction get planted the first couple times you watch porn. The younger you are, the more your brain's going to be impacted. But then of course, frequency, consistency and intensity also matter. So those are some of the variables. So yeah, the younger you are, it's going to impact your brain more. And then usually what happens is this is the brain science behind it. But we're forgetting the part that like when somebody finds porn when they're young, it makes their brain feel really good. That's what dopamine does. It makes your brain feel really good. You feel numbed out, you're taken away from your stress or whatever you've got going on. So people tend to go back because that made them feel really good. And then they tend to go back because of habituation, intolerance, building. There tends to be escalation. So for most people, it's a slippery slope. They find it at whatever age. They do water it frequently and consistently because of tolerance building, they end up escalating. And. And I've heard thousands of men's stories, thousands. And they all think they're going to tell me. And this doesn't come from a place of judgment. They think they're going to tell me a unique story I've never heard before. And yes, it has individual nuances, but the way this plays out is very systematic for people. And the program that I developed is the system to basically reverse what has happened systematically for people. Because it's like a puzzle. And you know, some of the puzzle pieces are bigger or smaller or more difficult to put in place for people, but the puzzle pieces inherently are very similar.

Okay, got it. So it's a little bit More complex. But I can kind of tell my husband we've been married for 31 years. When we first got married, yeah, we watched some porn and so forth. But yeah, we would do it once a week, but it wasn't like something that we needed. Why didn't we got addicted to porn? Because we were doing it like more than twice. And how come in our brain, it wasn't as impressionable, but we can stop anytime and we can get aroused without it. Why is it some brain more. The word for me is impressionable versus there are some that are.

There's two main things I'm going to tell you about that. Number one is that it's nature, nurture and navigation. These three are one thing. So, like, we know that some brains are more susceptible to addiction from. Brains don't fall far from the tree. That's the nature part. So some brains inherently are born with. Usually it's because they're born with like higher stress levels or what I was talking about. That stunted development is actually the brain's kind of stuck in a slower processing mode. So when kids are younger, their brains process slower. We can talk about that later if we want to. But inherently what happens is then that brain needs soothing and stimulation more than a different brain. So that's the nature piece. Then there's the nurture piece, which is the environment. So many people suffer from trauma. There's bullying, sexual abuse is. There's a very high correlation between if a person was sexually abused and if they have problems with porn. So trauma is one issue and dysfunction. And most families have dysfunction. It's just a matter of flavor and magnitude. But the greater the magnitude of family dysfunction, that can be a component. So that's the nurture part. Navigation is. This is the last piece. And this is. Goes along with the other thing I was going to say it's the why. Why is someone using porn? That's the navigation. Nature, nurture, navigation. So ultimately, what happens for people who end up having a compulsion or an addiction to porn is that they're using it for mood regulation. So the idea being like, if you found porn and you're watching porn casually and you don't need it to regulate your mood, it doesn't do the same thing for you. The why is different. For many people, when they were in adolescence, there was family dysfunction. Their parents are arguing in the other room or they're being bullied at school. And we know there's a very strong link between neurological dysregulation, the brain stuff. I just told you emotional dysregulation, meaning difficulty calming oneself down from inside. Emotional dysregulation, which lends that person to need to go to something outside themselves to calm them down. And porn is perfect at that. Unfortunately, it's also harmful.

So can you also correlate that porn addiction is almost very similar to almost opioids addiction or nicotine addiction? Because I do pain management and I see the opioid type of what you're describing, the compulsion, just like they can't function without it. Without with the pain medicine they're on high dose and that dose keep escalating. And then I see the same thing with nicotine as well. My mom has been addicted to cigarettes for at least 60 years, and it killed her. But is that almost on the same or a little bit different?

It's very similar. And the science shows that the brain mechanisms are very similar to substance abuse. But I can tell you one thing, is that within our brains we have opioid peptides. So those peptides are actually released during watching porn and very much associated with not only substance addictions, but it is a behavioral addiction. So it's closer to like gambling or online shopping addiction and now Internet addiction. Just being addicted to social media or to watching videos, that's running rampant these days. So it is a behavioral addiction, but it's kind of this internalized drug addiction with dopamine and also kind of an opioid peptide relationship. So what that does is it helps to manage pain internally. So they're also the people who become consistent users, they're also managing pain too, in that way. But it appeals to people because they think, people tell me all the time too, they're like, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs, I hardly drink. Haven't like been with a million women, so I'm not at risk of getting any, anybody pregnant. They're like, I never knew this was bad for me. But then those are people who right now, they have difficulty thinking. They have anhedonia, they feel numb and general malaise, like relationship dissatisfaction, they're unsatisfied with their partner. All things correlated with porn addiction.

So what happened when you need that dopamine all the time and you need to get a higher level dopamine, what happened in your brain?

So what happens is if you don't give it to your brain, you suffer from withdrawal and it becomes really difficult. So, and I call it the 4D cycle of porn addiction. So it's all substantiated by science. Like when a person has an urge or craving to watch porn. That's a dopamine drip. And we know from science, you have three seconds to pivot out and not give in to the drip, not move towards it, but move away. And if you don't pivot out within three seconds, you'll find yourself moving towards. I call it the dopamine deluge. So, so that's when people, they get the urge to watch porn and then they decide they're going to. A lot of dopamine gets flowing even before they start watching porn. That's how addiction works too. Then after you're in a porn session, your brain's in a dopamine drowning. The drowning is basically what desensitizes the brain. But ultimately when you're done watching porn, then you are in a dopamine deficit state state when you try to go back into your life. So that's what leads to the anxiety and the depression, anger and irritability.

Wow, that is something new that I've learned. So we know what porn addiction can do for you and how bad. So how do we rewire that? And tell us about your system called the brain rewire.

My system is very successful and when porn came into my life and that's, you know, I think most people don't focus on porn unless like I didn't care about porn until it landed in my lap. And somebody I cared about was highly addicted to porn even though I didn't see that coming. So that's when I decided to figure this out. And I was perfectly prepared to. But what I was going to say is that my approach is a neuro biopsychosocial approach. Most approaches are a biopsychosocial approach, meaning what I focus on is helping to regulate a person's brain basically to bring that brain closer to the optimal brain performance pattern, which then helps them to use their mind and their body better within the context of their social relationships. So I've put together a digital program, we call it porn Free brain forever. And basically it walks people through an unwire, rewire and hardwire process in the unwire section is basically creating more awareness. Self awareness for people who are addicted to porn tends to be really low because of the brain dysregulation. So more self awareness about triggers, about stressors. The two main uses that, you know how I told you about emotional regulation? Stress and boredom. Stress and boredom is why people use porn so like helping them to figure out their stressors times where they feel like they're bored, which I would contend is lack of Overstimulation these days, not boredom at all. I don't think anybody's been bored since like 1975, you know, or 1980. But anyway, in the unwire section, we're figuring teaching people how to pivot away when they feel these urges and cravings, because that's the most difficult part for people, very difficult to unwire their brain from the need. And we also do look back into their past for trauma and dysfunction and trying to break that neuro rigidity, create more neuroplasticity. In the rewire section, it's basically then we move into like, how do you establish a lifestyle that facilitates peak performance without porn? So you have to create a new lifestyle. For some people, it's just nuancing their lifestyle a little bit. For other people, it requires a significant lifestyle change. But the whole section in the program, it teaches people how to rewire their brains in that way. Executive function tends to be struggle. Executive function, meaning planning, organization, ability to stay on. One thing that comes from the desensitization, monetization in the reward center. So one way I help people is through what I call an executive function brain boosting project to start firing up those neurotransmitters and those dopamine receptors again and relinking their brain back to their life, Unlinking it from porn, linking it to dopamine in their life. And then the hardwire section primarily is helping them to figure out how to decrease stress and then offset and mitigate it. Stress is the number one thing that threatens to throw people back into porn.

Right? So stress, boredom is what kind of drive you towards porn. I can see that. And then. But to get out of that is unwire, rewire and hardwire. Right? To essentially stimulate your own dopamine naturally with spending time with loved ones. We know that spending time with the people you love, you care about friends and family, having a sexual relationship.

Totally. I was just gonna say, like, establishing healthy sexuality is imperative because if you're getting all that dopamine at lower levels, but good healthy levels, then you don't need to go into porn. And we know it's called compulsive sexual behavior disorder. Porn addiction basically is in the ICD 11, but it's characterized as compulsive sexual behavior disorder. Number one way it manifests is porn and masturbation and then also acting out with many sexual partners that a person doesn't know that much. So then the idea is it's compulsion to go back to regulate mood. But when you create healthy sexuality, that compulsion can go down and you can be engaged with your partner. But what I wanted to say is that compulsive sexual behavior disorder is a mouthful also. So in the literature, in the science, it's characterized as hypersexuality. And I think people can relate with that because they think about sex all the time when they go out. They can't stop checking people out, lusting after people, which, of course, in today's day and age is young women are scantily clad everywhere. I have three daughters where I'm constantly like, you need more clothing on you. And so the idea is, what I try to do is take the hypersexual brain and bring it back to healthy sexuality. And those are two very different things. And I just wanted to share one other thing is one primary resource that I use when I'm helping people is technology. So there's neuromodulation technology that exists that can rewire a brain without people having to think about it at all. And so if people are really stuck, especially people with erectile dysfunction, brains can really get stuck in that desensitized mode. And you could quit porn. I work with people, they're like, I haven't watched porn in five years, but I still have erectile dysfunction. There's two things that are usually happening. They're still desensitizing their brain in some way, which I usually try to figure that out for them, and then secondarily, it can just be stuck in that mode. So I use technology to assess how a person's brain is performing and then shift it out of that mode, and they don't have to try.

Interesting. So can you tell us a little bit more about this technology? Is this the neural feedback that you use?

Yeah, and there's two ways, because I am trying to help people, and I understand, like, not everybody can afford all things that are out there. So all the different services that I offer, they go from free. I have thousands of videos on YouTube that I help people for free. My top tier program is professional neurofeedback coaching, which starts with what's called a QEG brain map. I measure a person's brain. I can see the dysregulation, I can see the levels of dysfunction. I work with people all over the world. It's all online now. And then this top tier neurofeedback, it has a ton of data. It's all data driven. Like, I love the data. You can see where your brain started, where it is on any given day, and how close it is to the optimal Pattern People totally can see with the data and feel that they're getting better. But then I also encourage people to purchase. There's a brain training headband and I don't sell it. I have a link that links through to the manufacturer. It's around $225. So most people can afford that and they can start using it at home and not have to work with me at all. And so a lot of people brain.

Training headband, you also use eeg, which monitors for brain wave, a two channel EG that monitor the brain wave. And then also you neurofeedback, such as a heart rate and as well too.

All the feedback is QEEG feedback. So the way that works is in neurofeedback and people, it's difficult to understand. The way that it works is when you're doing neurofeedback, you, you wear the headband, but we use professional software, it has a sensor also. And using a professional app, all you do is watch videos. And so then the video stream in the app and it's neurofeedback feedback for your brain. When your brain is hitting the parameters for calm focus or healthy baseline arousal, the screen plays bright and the audio plays loud. But if your brain goes back to erectile dysfunction mode, the screen goes dim and the audio goes low. That's why you don't have to think.

About it at all.

Your brain tries to see the screen because it wants to see the video you're watching. It is based on something called operant conditioning, which most people know about. Pavlov's dog, ring his bell, his dog's drooled. That's classical conditioning. Operant conditioning takes it a step further, which means if we reinforce a behavior over and over, you'll get more of that behavior. And if you don't reinforce the old behavior, it will wire. So what we do is we're reinforcing through this positive feedback of video and audio, the use of the healthier brain pattern and the other one will basically weed over, weed over those old neural pathways. So I liken it because I know it's difficult to understand. I liken it to. If you want to get strong biceps, you don't have to talk to five people to ask them how to get strong biceps. All you have to do is get 20 pound weights, start repping the bicep curls. When the 20 pounds is light, you swap it out for 30 pounds. You keep repping the curls, swap it out for 40 and before you know it, your biceps are strong. The app Works the same way. It's always making it more difficult. As long as you keep doing the sessions, it will keep increasing the difficulty level to make your brain stronger and stronger.

Oh, wow, that's very interesting. So how do you rewire for performance anxiety?

Performance anxiety basically is stress activation in the brain. I mean, it makes sense. You want to be with your partner, you want to have a sexual experience, which I call it an experience, because many people who are addicted to porn think of it as a performance. I want people to think of it as experience because that alone shifts your mind out of performance anxiety. You're not putting a performance on. You're having an experience, which if you've watched a lot of porn, it is a performance that you're worried about. So the idea is you're not performing, you're having an experience, but it creates stress activation. Stress activation is that fast speed in the brain that I told you about. That fast speed is far away from healthy baseline arousal. So if you just think about it logically, we want people at healthy baseline arousal, a 5. If you're stressed out, your brain's up at a 10. So to be able to get an erection and have an orgasm, there has to be the perfect combination of sympathetic engagement. Your brain has to be on activated, not over activated hyperarousal or stress. And you have to be relaxed enough, parasympathetic. So quote, unquote, performance anxiety is like the worst thing for people who are trying to overcome erectile dysfunction. You know, going back to my work, I do think the beauty of my work is people can see that their brains are improving. Like, I don't have to convince them that you can see it in the data. So when you know that your brain is performing better, coming into better arousal, then you go try. And I will give people strategies, coaching strategies based on what I know about porn addiction. We can talk about that in a minute if you want. But then when they engage in this experience in a different way, performance anxiety goes down. But long story short, we need to bring that very fast speed down, or you are moving further away from your goal. So it's imperative that while you're trying to be with your partner, you set yourself up for success at incrementally more levels, higher levels.

So I think you mentioned that you wanted to kind of talk a little bit more. Could you elaborate on that point? I wanted to kind of like, have our listener kind of get a little bit more details on that.

Yeah, sure. So, like, you mean in terms of, okay, you're ready to Be with your partner, but you're feeling stressed out about it. What do you do? Yeah, is that even this brain training headband that I talked about that people can buy that even that gives you a readout of where your brain is at using EEG for 220, which is pretty amazing. So you can see, okay, my baseline stress is low. But you want to set yourself up for success, so you want to try to be with your partner when no one's around. I have five kids. That literally never happens. But you want to try to set yourself up for when you're feeling relaxed, when you have the lowest levels of stress, because that alone is going to bring that. That hyper arousal that fast speed down. A lot of people don't tell their partner that they are struggling with sexual arousal dysfunction. So performance anxiety is heightened because their partner doesn't know. And clearly their partner knows something's up. They haven't talked about it. So as much as your listener doesn't want to hear me say that communication will help your cause, if you're communicating with your partner, then you will have a greater likelihood of having a successful experience. Because most partners just want to be with you. They don't need a performance. They just want to be with you and have it be fun and engaging and a shared, healthy sexual experience. So communication can be imperative. But also going back to that idea of desensitization, it does take some time to get used to feeling pleasure with lower levels of dopamine. So if your brain's used to these very high levels, it takes some time. So another strategy that I help people with is like, many men will go to fantasy in their mind so that they can get there in the bedroom with their partner because they're struggling with erectile dysfunction. Every time they do that, they're actually making their case worse because they're going to heighten dopamine, which means they will continue to need it. So it's like I call it Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. You know, you're trying to be with your partner, but then you're trying to figure out how you're going to make it happen. A lot of people I work with are using medication. So if they're using like a little blue pill or anything like that, I encourage them to not use it every single time and sometimes be able to feel more confident using it. But other times you have to practice. If you don't use the muscle of getting to healthy arousal, that muscle of your brain, it can't learn to get there by itself. Give themselves a break, that this thing isn't going to happen overnight. Like, especially all the people I work with, they've been watching porn for 5, 10, 15, 20, 30, 40 years. So like rewiring your brain, the bar is 90 days, which, that's the bar in addiction recovery. But in 90 days, if you're implementing a lot of strategies, you can have a significant improvement.

Wow. So for the listeners that are working, what do you suggest that they can do? If they are suffering from porn anxiety and performance anxiety, what they can do to, like, maybe one to three things that they can do at home right now that can kind of either self diagnose or self treat themselves.

Sure. So one thing I would encourage you to do is try to ascertain if you are in fact desensitizing your brain still. So what does that include? Any actual porn consumption? Do you watch porn? Are you on social media for sexual reasons? Going back to what I already said, the why, like when you go online, why are you there? A lot of people I work with, they watch yoga videos. It's not to learn yoga. Like, why are you watching what you're watching? If it's for a dopamine hit, you are in fact desensitizing your brain. Many people I work with, they just have no clue. They're continuing to desensitize their brain. If you struggle with erectile dysfunction and you are engaging in these behaviors, you are desensitizing your brain. You're going against what you are trying to accomplish. If you're masturbating, compulsive masturbation. Masturbation addiction is a real thing. It's very much happening across the world. Men, across the world, women, more women these days, but specifically men. So if you have a compulsive masturbation habit, again, you're likely desensitizing your brain. Because masturbating, you're going to fantasy. And it's higher level physical stimulation also. So, like, get real with yourself. Figure these things out. Because if you're not watching porn, but you're on social media and it's filled with young women, if you're on dating apps, if you're watching any videos that are simply for dopamine hits, if you're masturbating a lot, and if you go to fantasy, this whole thing can be internalized. One of my clients, he put it this way, that if you put him in a drug addict in a room together for 30 days, the drug addict comes out clean. He comes out the same because he's internalized. All of it. He doesn't need to watch porn. He doesn't even really need to masturbate. He can fantasize. And an interesting thing about my work is I can see that in people's brains. They'll tell me when they had an urge or what just happened. This morning is one of my clients said, oh, yeah, over the course of those four days, I was fantasizing a lot. And I saw the brain speed that is associated with dopamine was really high for those four days. Like, it changes when you do those things. It changes your brain and it's making your erectile dysfunction worse. So that's number one. The game is the game you can play with yourself is today, did you desensitize your brain in any way? Hopefully the answer is no. But if the answer is yes, your action is not aligned with your goal. And then number two is, have you resensitized your brain in any way today? So we know the easy ways to do that is healthy food, nutritious food, exercise, getting outside in nature, meditation, brain training. That's the way that I help people do it. Healthy sexuality with your partner, work that you love. Have you resensitize your brain. So the game is every day, don't desensitize your brain and resensitize your brain. That's the easiest. I offer a program, it's called three Steps to heal Sexual Arousal Dysfunction at Home, which teaches people all about this desensitization and resensitization piece.

Interesting. Now, how you define the word desensitization. So that way people can. You and I understand that, but people can under kind of understand. What does that mean?

The easiest way is, are you doing something that involves hypersexuality, that men can discernibly feel the dopamine hit in their brain. They know when they're getting it. They don't get that until they know it's a dopamine hit and that it's bad for them. But like, for example, if you go out to the mall and you're just checking women out the whole time, every person you check out is a dopamine hit. And they feel it in their brains too. So that would be a desensitization activity. Masturbation's desensitization, social media, just to look at people and their body parts. Desensitization. It means any activity that you go to that's related to hypersexuality, to regulate your mood, to feel good, to offset your stress, to fill your pocket of boredom.

Right. Wow. Well, that's what social media is, right? When you're bored, you're at the doctor's office, dentist's office, you just pull up your phone, start going to social media. That's what I do.

I don't do that. And it's really interesting. I deliberately don't do that. And then, like, there's days where, you know, if I work all day long, my brain. I feel it in my brain. Like, I'll reach for my phone and I'll be like, what am I doing? I don't even do that. But, like, on the days where my brain's ramped up, I can feel the need to do that. There's a lot of science coming out right now that is showing how bad Internet addictions are becoming for. They call them digital natives, people who grew up with phones, and that it's creating all the same problems that porn creates just being online and especially social media. And I'll tell you why is that. Social media in particular, but all the streaming services, they capitalize on seeking and searching behavior. Seeking and searching behavior. Looking, swiping, looking. Look, look, look. Swipe, swipe, swipe. All of that is a dopamine activity. Every time you swipe up, you're getting a hit of dopamine, and you're looking for the thing that you want to watch. Swipe, swipe, swipe, stay. Seeking and searching dopamine. We know that. So anytime you're doing that, that's why I won't even look for the show on Netflix. My husband's like, why don't you ever look for the show? I'm like, I don't want to get caught in a seeking and searching loop. You find to watch, and I'll be back. And for me, I'm always trying to protect my brain. Like, my brain's my favorite resource, so I want it to last me a long time. So I'm very aware of what the damage does. And, you know, again, I told you, I have a lot of kids. I'm trying desperately to help them manage their screen time. And they're doing better than average, for sure.

Yeah. I wanted to ask you, actually, before we end, what is this brain retraining band that you refer to? What is that?

Yeah, there's a link on my website. It's called Muse M U S E.

Oh, yes, yes, I'm familiar with that. You put it on, and then it almost worked like an eeg. Almost, Right?

It is eeg.

Yeah.

In it, they have what's called a mind meditation. The mind meditation is actually neurofeedback. And so the way I talk about it is it's the one universal protocol. So, like, using the Muse headband, I can't set the protocols for what a person's brain needs. It's the one universal protocol, but it's a really good starting point for people. And if anybody's interested in purchasing the headband, I would encourage them to go to my website, because you always get the best pricing, and they always get the best customer service if they need it.

Okay, well, great.

I sell a lot of Muse headbands for the Muse company.

Right, right. But then when you said customer service, customer service by Muse, or customer service.

By means, they know who purchases it through my link. And because I have a lot of people using Muses, they are really good about if you need any help with your headband. I've been a muser since. For 11 years. I got my Muse headband long before I told people to use it. And honestly, I use mine almost every day. So I'm like, the hair club for men. I use that headband just to keep my brain regulated. Like, what it does is it'll just pull your brain towards the optimal performance pattern. And what that means is every day it's decreasing your stress, and every day it's improving your focus. Who couldn't use that? Right?

Absolutely. You know what? I have a Muse band sitting in that drawer right there. I haven't even used.

I. I was gonna say. Don't even tell me. I know, because people will call me, and they're like, I bought the Muse headband six months ago. Like, and how's it going? And they're like, I haven't taken out of the box. I'm like, you do know it's not gonna regulate your brain in the box. And now they just did an update not long ago where now you can see the Brain wave power bands. Actually, if I can offer your listeners. One other thought is that I was telling you that before we started recording that I have always had a Brain channel on YouTube. It's smaller. It has, like, 25, 000 subscribers, I think. But what I do on that channel is every month, I offer short webinars on how to use the museum. So there. If you get amused and you don't know what you're looking for in the data, and you want to know how to use it best, especially for arousal dysfunction, there is a playlist over there where you can go and specifically learn how to use that headband for free.

Oh, what channel is that is that.

That one is called. It is, but it's called Dr. Trish Lee brain Rewire. Then my other main channel is just called Dr. Trish Lee.

Okay, well, that is a good tool. I'm always on top of offering my listeners and audience some type of home based tool because now we have an international audience. And so people need something that they can use at home because not everybody can access to an expert like yourself or me. So I always want to give them something that they can do, self help at home. So it seems like they bring retraining or Muse can help them give some type of objective data on the stress management.

100%. That's why I tell people and I joke with people like I do consultation still. So when I talk to people and they'll, they'll say, oh, you know, I can't afford a brain map right now. I'm like, just get the headband and start using it. I know it's a terrible business plan because, you know, Muse makes the money, but I'm like, it is the thing that you need to get started if you want to get a really affordable tool. The Muse headband. I really think it's a game changer for people because what they used to have to go into an office for and it would cost thousands of dollars, now it's $225 and you can use it every day. And so a lot of people that hear me say that they get it and I get emails, thank you for telling me about the headband. I'm feeling and performing better.

And I'm like, well, I, I have mine in there, so I'm gonna pull it out after we end this, this interview. It's been sitting there for at least a few months. Six months.

Yeah. And then I bought my parents one. My parents don't live in the same state as me. I bought my parents one a while ago. I went to visit them. And you know, the Muse headband goes across your forehead and it has sensors. It has three sensors in the forehead, two in the ears. And I go to visit my mom, she's wearing it like this across the top of her head. And she goes, I haven't used it that much. I'm like, God, I hope not, because you have it on wrong, Mom. Like, she's never used it. I'm like, oh, my God.

So she's using as a.

She ended up giving it to my sister. I told, I said, give it to my sister. You're never going to use this. My sister uses it all the Time. She loves it.

So, yeah, well, great, great. Well, thank you. So how can our listener find out more about you and how can they work with you?

Yeah, sure. So my website is Dr. Trishlee.com I will tell you. I have a book coming out in next March. It is called Mind Over Explicit Matter, which is really cool. All of this is in that book. So that is an exciting addition to the way that I try to help people. I also have a YouTube channel where there are over a thousand videos. It's Dr. Trish Lee. Those videos all have a brain hack strategy at the end of the video, and I get emails every single day, people thanking me for helping them to come out of porn and heal their brains and heal their erectile dysfunction and anxiety and all that simply by using the YouTube videos. So that's really exciting. And if you want that type of help, go over to YouTube.

Yeah, that's how I find her, actually. You popped up on my feed. I was on YouTube. And of course, well, me as a channel, I subscribe to other channels as well. So that's how I kind of stay in the loop.

I don't go on YouTube, which is so funny. As a person who has a YouTube channel. I never watch YouTube. I just said to one of the people that work for me, I'm like, I really need to start going on YouTube to see what other people are doing again.

It's time for me to do it at nighttime before bed, but also keep me abreast of what's going on as well. So having said that, thank you for being on our show and showing your wisdom on porn and rewiring the brain. Because I've always said that, that the brain is the largest sexual organization. It is not the organ below the bell. It is in the brain. Because oftentimes, as a sexual medicine specialist treating thousands of men with ed, it's easy to actually treat the physical causes of ed. It's harder to treat the mental causes of ed, which is so complex. The stress, the boredom, or the relationship component, communication, all intertwined at the same time. So oftentimes, men that are functioning 100% physically still has ED because they haven't resolved what's going on.

Those are the people I work with. I encourage everybody to go to your doctor, make sure physically, everything is in check. But on the brain map, the assessment that I provide, I can see the dysregulation and people can see it so easily. And then once we see it's there, it's definitely a piece of the puzzle.