#031: How to Get Real Value from a Business Coach + The Power of Gratitude

Welcome to the High Income Business Writing Podcast, helping you propel your writing business to a whole new level. And now, here's your host, Ed Gandia.

Hey everyone, thanks for joining me for episode number 31 of the High Income Business Writing Podcast. My name is Ed Gandia and this is the podcast for business writers and copywriters who want to take their writing businesses to the six figure level or, or the part time equivalent. As a reminder, you can find detailed show notes of this episode by going to b2b launcher.com episode 31. Today I'm going to address two different topics which I normally don't do, but it's just me today and you know, it just, I think these topics are related in some strange way, but the topics are basically coaching. We're going to be talking a little bit about coaching. And the second topic also very important, gratitude. And very appropriate for this week, which is Thanksgiving here in the US So let's go ahead and get started. My thoughts on coaching and this is something that many of you have asked me about over the last few months. Not a ton, but enough for me to realize, you know what? I think this is something I need to address. I haven't addressed it in the podcast before and I just wanted to give you my very honest and sincere thoughts on coaching, especially my experience in coaching as a coachee, as someone being coached and mentored by others, and the journey that I've taken and then some thoughts from that perspective as to really how I would look at coaching or maybe some thoughts on that will get you thinking as to whether or not this is something that would be helpful for you or not. So I'm going to do that. I'm going to share my journey with you, both as a coachee and now as a coach as well. And my promise to you is this. I'm going to give you an honest discussion here. This is not any kind of sales pitch in disguise, nothing like that. I just jotted down all my thoughts about this, which is good because it really made me think more about this. And so it was helpful for me. And that's what I love about doing the show, that by putting it together, I benefit from this material as much as you guys do. All right, so I've always been a believer in some sort of coaching or mentoring or just getting outside help. And this is probably because I realized a long time ago that I had my own set of limitations. And there are others out there with ideas, insights and perspectives that were unique, they were helpful, and they could shortcut My way to a certain result or a certain level of personal or professional growth. I started reading self help books in high school and I can't remember which one I read first, but I remember one in particular that I read my senior year of high school, towards the very end about success. And I can't even remember. Well, you know what? I do remember the name of it and I don't think it was a very popular book. I just happened to be at a bookstore, picked it up. The title was Roger's Rules for Success. I remember that. I don't remember the author's name. His last name was Rogers, I believe. I don't think that was his first name. But it really came to me at a good time. I was a little nervous about entering college. It was a whole new thing for me. I had lived in Japan for three years. My stepdad was in the Air Force and I graduated from high school there. It was a military base, Department of Defense high school. So I wasn't out in a Japanese high school or anything like that. But you can imagine after being out there, away from the US for three years, in a very different culture, very different type of community, the thought of not just going from high school to college, but also shifting from one culture to another was a bit, I wouldn't say frightening, but it made me a little nervous. I don't know, I saw that book at the bookstore, it sounded interesting. I picked it up, man, I tell you what I remember, that's when I got hooked. So again, I don't know if that was the first book or not, but my freshman year of college I also remember I went to. I took a long bus trip to go see a friend of mine, a Greyhound bus trip. And it must have been like a 12 hour ride. And my roommate was generous enough to let me borrow a set of Earl Nightingale tapes. And it was the program lead the field from Earl Nightingale, which is one of the best selling tape programs ever. And I listened to that whole tape set in that long bus ride and it resonated with me at a very deep level. It really shook me up. And I mean from then on, forget it. I really bought into these ideas and still today I have that program, I listen to it, it's fantastic. So I've been into self help, I guess you could say, really from a very early age. To me it's interesting that I am into self help because I'm a very independent person. So you think that someone with an independent personality. I'm contrarian by nature as well. Someone like that wouldn't really want outside help, outside advice and insights. But I don't believe that they're mutually exclusive. I think it can be very independ and still recognize that there's value in getting outside help. In terms of coaching, I didn't really hire a coach until about 10 years ago. But my first coaches were really more mentors than anything else. And they weren't people that I hired. These are people who just kind of took me under their wing. One was a my boss's boss. Another one was a guy that I worked with by the name of Hank Carroll. And he has no idea that, that he was mentoring me. But I specifically remember one Saturday afternoon. So I would go into the office on Saturdays to catch up because my week was so incredibly hectic. I worked like 70 hour weeks. This is my first job out of college and one afternoon, technically I was supposed to, I'm not supposed to, but I really like to leave the office Saturdays at noon. I didn't really want to work past noon. I wanted to have some of the weekend for me. But this weekend I was there. It was three o' clock and Hank was there and he had a sit down with me about my career path and about my lack of assertiveness. And I won't go into all the details, but that was a pivotal moment for me because Hank took the time. And this is, this is not a guy who was known for mentoring others. He was very independent, liked to kind of run his own show. And it was all about Hank. But I tell you, Hank really, really woke me up to the fact that I needed to be more assertive and really take charge of my life and in my career. So I would say that it was people like Hank who were kind of my first coaches. But my first coach whom I hired, the first person I hired to really coach me was in 2003, a gentleman by the name of Karen Dougherty. And Karen helped me with my writing. I was taking a copywriting course from awai American Writers and Artists. And I was going through it. It was self study. I was going through it on my own. And this one of the first courses I had taken on copywriting. I had my full time day job at the time and I had already made the decision that I wanted to go out on my own. And as I was taking the course I realized, you know what, I could really use some help because I need some feedback. Am I doing the right thing? Is my copy good? How can I improve it? So at the time, AWAI had These coaches that you could hire, it wasn't cheap. But I took the plunge. I realized that there was great value there and they hooked me up with Kieran and he was fabulous, helped me avoid a ton of mistakes, helped me accelerate my progress, and above all, he helped me boost my confidence in my own writing. And that's not something that I necessarily hired him for, but it was a byproduct that really paid off in a huge, huge way. My second formal coach was Chris Marlowe. And I've talked about Chris before. She's still around, she still coaches freelance writers. And I hired her early in her coaching practice. This is early 2004. So at the time I had been out there looking for clients for about six months and I was failing miserably at landing work, getting clients. And I was really starting to get nervous because I had set a goal to go out of my own within a couple of years and do this. I was very serious about making the shift and becoming a full time freelancer and I was having no luck. And I thought, my gosh, at this rate, I'll probably never realize this dream. So it was interesting how, just how serendipitous this encounter was. I can't even remember how it came across her. Somebody may have forwarded me in one of her newsletters or I somehow read an article of hers. But anyway, she came to me at the right time and I read what she had to say. I said, sign me up. So we had a. We had a brief discussion, I filled out her application, we had a brief discussion on the phone and we determined we were a good fit for each other. I signed up for a. At the time, she had a three month program. I'm not sure what she has these days, but she had a three month, one on one program where we met weekly. And it was basically all about the business side of my copywriting practice, setting up my website, developing my message, my positioning, and creating a prospecting system. And I tell you what, it took about six months from the day where I started working with Kris until I had my first client. But I've said this before, I wouldn't have been able to do it without her insights, her help, her assistance. She was exactly who I needed and offered exactly what I needed at that time in my career. So if you're listening to this, Chris, I, as you know, I really valued your insights and everything you did for me back then. It was fantastic. And that propelled me to really a level where I now had a couple of clients and now I could it was kind of more of a self sustaining thing. I now here again started developing the confidence that I needed to, to keep up that momentum, to develop greater momentum. From there, I hired another coach and my next one was Steve Sloan White, which many of you are familiar with. So Steve, I really didn't hire him for any sort of formal coaching or mentoring, but I got in touch with Steve via Chris. I think it was the prior year. And in 2005, 2007, 2006, we connected and we kind of stayed in touch. And I approached him and I think it was 2005, I approached him about just basically buying some of his time, maybe buying like a package of hours that I could use when I had burning questions. And what I would do is I would kind of jot down those questions and when I had maybe two or three of them, I would schedule an hour with him. And this was a. He became a great sounding board for me and it was exactly what I needed at the time. You know, just someone I wasn't struggling, but I wasn't fully self employed yet. Right. So this is the point in my business where I was in between. I was working my business on the side, growing it pretty fast. I was very successful doing it on the side, but you know, things started coming up that I didn't have answers to, so I needed someone that I could turn to and ask questions of and that here again, exactly what I needed at that point in my business. So I forget how many sessions we had, but I bet we, I bet we had about six or eight sessions over the course of six to eight months. And it was, it was wonderful. He gave me huge value, that ability to tap into a seasoned professional's expertise, experience, insights. That was fantastic. And you know, it's interesting, I didn't know it at the time, but I was also planting the seeds of a relationship with Steve. So we got to know each other a little bit through this process. And that eventually led to doing a blog together in 2008, several years later, and then eventually writing a book together in 2009, 2010, the wealthy freelancer, which we co wrote also with Pete Savage, my good friend. So, so that was it. And you know, that was 2005, 2006, when I worked with Steve in a long time went by before I had another coach. More specifically, 2012 was my next relationship with a coach. So, you know, that's six years I was growing, my business started shifting and my business started evolving a bit where I was doing some training and coaching myself and putting out great content for other freelancers. I launched International Freelancers Academy, International Freelancers Day, promoting the book the Wealthy Freelancer. So a lot of different things were happening. And anyway, 2012, I actually, it was the end of 2011, I came across a gentleman by the name of Peleg Topp. And here again, very serendipitous event. I had a last minute cancellation at the International Freelancers Day online conference in late 2011 and I needed to fill that spot and I only had about a couple of weeks to fill it. I didn't know who I was going to ask. And I, out of the blue, get an email from Peleg. And I had heard of Peleg before, but I think he was sending out this email to his full list because he had been kind of out of touch with everyone and he was starting a newsletter again and he wanted to just let everyone know that he was about to come out to be on the lookout for it. I didn't even know I was on his list, but I must have opted into his list at some point. So anyway, anyway, excuse me. I suddenly get an email from Peleg, not to me personally, but to his full list. And I thought, that's it, he would be perfect as a speaker at my online conference. So I reach out to him, he agreed to do it and we talked a couple of times. Everything went great. He delivered a great talk and, and afterwards he reached out to me, he said, you know, I'd like to talk to you about coaching. Do you have a coach? Are you considering coaching? And I said, no, I've had coaching before, I don't have a coach right now. And he started pursuing me and honestly at first I resisted because I didn't know him that well and it wasn't something that I was really considering at the time. And I wasn't sure if I knew where he was coming from and what kind of coaching he offered. And I hadn't had, I didn't have anything defined that I needed help with. But I tell you, he really pursued me and I'm glad he did because Peleg has been extremely influential in my thinking about not just business, but also about personal growth, professional growth, by dealing with fear, insecurity, balance, success, creativity. And also he's helped me develop a truly abundance mindset. I've always believed in that, but it's not something necessarily I practice or believed at a deeper level. And he has helped me really strengthen that belief. So interestingly enough, even though I wasn't looking for someone at the time, Peleg was exactly What I needed at that point in my journey, especially when this is 2012, when I began to seriously transition from doing mostly freelance writing work to doing mostly training, teaching, coaching, mentoring myself. So this was another big shift for me, and I didn't realize how much I would need myself from a personal growth standpoint and how much support I would need in that area as I made that transition. So he was able to fill that gap very nicely. And you know what? It's interesting. I was finally at a point in my personal growth and my spiritual journey and in my business to allow that kind of coaching into my life, the kind of coaching that Peleg provides now, this has been the most challenging coaching relationship I've had, because unlike the others, where it was more of a really more of a mentoring relationship, and I'll talk about that a little bit more in a minute. Peleg really challenged me in many different ways. And I will tell you, that was not fun. And it hasn't been fun when you get challenged the way that he challenges you. But I will tell you that challenge has been a very healthy challenge. And he's also helped me to get to know myself so much better than I did before. Peleg uses the Enneagram, which is a personality. I don't even know what you call it, but it's a personality profile that's been around for hundreds of years, and it's been fantastic to get to know myself better and to get more insights on who I am, how I act, why I do what I do or don't do, what I don't do. Through the Enneagram, it's really brought clarity to my business and to my personal life. And in the process, this whole relationship with Peleg has made me a better teacher, a better mentor, a better coach, a better leader of my own tribe, and just a better dad, a better husband, and a better friend. So this has been really a fantastic experience for me. And so when I look back and really to get ready for this episode, I wanted to look back at all these experiences and think through them. And I took some notes and I journaled about this and specifically, what have been the biggest lessons that I've learned from getting coaching? And some of them I've already kind of hinted at or even told you straight up. But I've summarized it into five kind of big categories, and that's what I wanted to spend a few minutes on. So the first big lesson has been that great coaching is less about getting information or getting training than it is about helping you grow personally and professionally, I may have initially hired my coaches to get specific knowledge in an area, and I often got the knowledge that I was seeking. But the biggest benefits for me have been the unadvertised benefits. So by that I mean the insights and the ability to have a good sounding board. The accountability and the push they gave me to dig deeper, to try harder and try differently, not so much harder many times, but look at things differently. And then this is very important to find my own answers after our sessions, with some guidance, of course, but to really kind of plant some seeds that will give me kind of an anchor or something to really think through for the rest of the week and before next session, and also to just become my very best in the process, to really work on myself at a deeper level. And as you can imagine, this is especially true with the work that Peleg and I have done together. He has continually pushed me to dig deep inside myself and to come up with the right answers and the right solutions. And yes, he would sometimes, and he will sometimes give me his own opinion if I ask. But one thing he's done very well is he's always refused to become kind of a. An interviewee. So it's not the kind of relationship where, okay, I got these questions for you and let me just interview you. And I think that's what a lot of people want. And as I've described here in my relationship with some of my other coaches, my previous coaches, that was exactly what I needed at that time. But with Peleg, I needed something different. And I think he understood that, and that's why we worked very well. So he would turn many of the questions around on me and forced me to think through the issue deeper and find my own answers. And I know that might sound a bit counterintuitive, and by that I mean hiring a coach to uncover many of these answers yourself, to find these answers and insights yourself. But I found that that's often exactly what it takes to achieve the highest level of performance, is to have someone who will challenge you and won't just spoon fe you every answer and every insight. They're there. They're there to give you insights and opinions. But at that level of coaching, you're really working with someone to help you find your way through the issue. I found that this kind of coaching is much more about working with what you've got. So you're the one who brings raw material to the table, and then you work together with the coach to make something big happen and many times make quantum leaps and improvement so it's not about giving you those gifts and talents, you know, prepackaged. It's about using what you already have inside you to grow. And I'll give you one example, just kind of an analogy here from a music instructor that I had in high school. So I played drums in high school, and there was a point where I got really serious, and I had. He was actually a neighbor of mine. He was a drummer, and he taught at a different school. But he took me under his wing, and he. And I forget what we traded, but we bartered something where I would, I think, babysit his kids, and then he would teach me. And it's funny, because I remember the first time I had him over my house. I had my drums set up, and my drums were not very good drums, and they didn't sound great at all. And they especially didn't sound great in my room because my room wasn't set up for that. So there was a lot of echo there. And I just cringed every time I played them because they sounded so bad. So, you know, I'm playing something for him, and he said, let me just show you. Let me just show you what you have to do. And he showed me, and he made those drums sing. I mean, those things were. They sounded amazing. I never heard those drums sound as good as he did when he got on there. So then he stepped aside, he had me get behind them again, and he showed me, okay, here's what you need to do. Focus on this. And I started doing what he asked me to do. And you know what? They may not have sounded as great as they did when he was playing them, but they sound pretty darn close. And it's. That's what I thought of when I was kind of thinking through this idea of, you know, you bring the raw material to the table, and a coach works with you to really elevate that and to take these. This raw material to the next level, to work with what you have and to make it sing, just like. Like my instructor did. I also wanted to share another metaphor here. Many of you know that I'm a cook, and I am very much into wine. And one of the things I've learned about wine making and growing grapes is that the best grapevines are the ones. I'm talking about the greatest vines. So the ones that make the best wine are actually stressed vines, and specifically vines that are given very, very little to work with. So they have poor soil, they're planted in rocky ground, they're given very little water, and you would never think that. You think that in order to make great wine, you'd need to tend these grapes and give them all the water they need, take care of these little plants. But the fact is you want them to work, you want them to work hard, and you can't give them what they would normally want. Because what happens is in these very difficult, challenging conditions, the vine has to struggle. And as a result, it has to work hard to grow its roots deep, deep into the ground. And a good vineyard manager knows this. So rather than helping the vines by giving them more water or better growing conditions, she'll just instead help the vine and just enough to stretch itself in that demanding environment. As a result, it delivers amazing fruit. So it's the same thing with a coaching relationship. There comes a point where you're best served by having your coach not spoon feed you, but give you enough to stretch you and to continue to challenge you in a different direction maybe, but in a controlled way that will help you achieve amazing results that would have been much harder to do on your own. So that's, that's the first big lesson. It's a great coaching is less about getting information, being, being spoon fed information or training than it is about helping you grow personally and professionally by being challenged and by using what you have inside you already. The second big lesson for me has been that great coaching only happens when you know what you want to accomplish. You have to be clear about what kind of outcome you want to create through the coaching relationship, either during or after that coaching relationship. And until you're clear, I would just suggest that you not hire a coach. I think it's important for you to be clear about this first. I also think that you have to be at a point in your life and in your business that matches up well with the type of coaching or mentoring that you're seeking. So in my case, I wouldn't have been a good fit for Peleg, for instance, back in 2007 or 2008. I just wasn't at a point in my business or my career where that kind of coaching would have benefited me, where I was ready for that. At the same time, I would probably be a good fit for a mentor in an area that I'm just now beginning to learn about. So, for example, running my own online business. So there's some things where I'm just now really starting to grow and to better understand, but I'm kind of at an elementary school level and for those sorts of things, maybe a different type of person would be best. Suited so more of a mentor than a deep level coach such as Peleg. So that leads me to an important point regarding what you want to get out of the coaching relationship, and that is know where you are in your journey journey and seek the type of relationship that best matches where you are. So again, and I've kind of been leading to this, this point, but I want to kind of explain it a little differently now. So my definition of coaching, because I've been using coaching, I've been using mentoring, so what's the difference? So I think real pure coaching in terms of business coaching is more of a collaborative relationship where you work together with your coach in a more fluid way to find answers, to find solutions and breakthroughs, to get breakthroughs. Mentoring, on the other hand, it tends to be more structured and it involves more teaching on the coach's part. It shouldn't just be teaching because then at that point is not even mentoring. It's just training. But there's back and forth for sure, but there's more teaching on the coach's part than in the more traditional business coaching model that I just described. Now, of course they're all different flavors in between these two categories that I just described. But if you kind of go at both extremes, what I have found is that that's what you see. Coaching is one thing, mentoring is another. And then there's, there's training. So you need to know where you are right now in the particular area where you want to improve to determine what would be the right solution for you, what type of assistance you would want, what type of relationship you're seeking. The third big lesson that, that I've learned over the last few years is that great coaching happens only when you're willing to take full responsibility for yourself and for your results. Great coaches are not there so you can outsource your problems to them. And I see this a lot, and I know it might sound obvious that of course you wouldn't want to do that, but I see this a lot and I come across people who are expecting that they, they have tried everything, they or they feel they've tried everything and they've basically given up. And what they want is to basically pay someone to take over their problems and tell them what to do or do it for them. And that is not what coaching is about. In fact, that's not even what mentoring is about. You have to do the work, you have to dig deep, you have to do the thinking, the mindset shift. You know, it's almost like and peleg has used this analogy with me. It's almost like going to the grocery store because you want to make a chocolate cake, getting the ingredients, getting home, and then a few hours later you're sitting on a couch watching tv and then you're upset because the cake is not done. Well, wait a minute, have you even started making the cake? Now you haven't made the cake, but you assumed that the cake would make itself. And as silly as that sounds, that's really what's. What's happening here. A lot of people feel that, well, if I go there, give me the ingredients and, you know, this will happen on its own and it's not. Similarly, I urge you not to get coaching or seek coaching if you're approaching the whole idea with a mindset of disbelief. And this is something I see quite a bit. And by that I mean the kind of thinking that goes, well, I don't believe he can help me. But you know what? Nothing else has worked so far, so I'm going to give this a try just so I can check it off my tried that list. You know, that kind of thinking, and that is absolutely not the right kind of mindset and the right kind of thinking that you need in order to make the success. The fourth big lesson has been that great coaching happens when you click with a coach and when that coach clicks with you. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want to open up to someone that I didn't like or trust or someone who didn't share or at least fully respect my values. The fact is that in this kind of relationship, you both have to click. There has to be trust, and it really helps if you like that person as well. So how can you tell if you're going come to click? Well, see if you can schedule a trial session or discovery call with your prospective coach, coaches or mentors. I think that's really important. So if you already don't, if you don't already know this person, you need to try to get to know them. So subscribe to the newsletter, they have a podcast. Listen to that. Get to know the person before you even contact them. And then once you contact them, make sure you can have some sort of conversation before you hire him or her. And finally, the fifth big lesson that I've learned from my coaching experiences is that great coaching happens when you truly think of it as an investment in yourself and in your business and not as a cost. Because I will tell you, good coaching or mentoring is not cheap. So it's very easy to Freak out and think of it as a cost. But I got to tell you, you, it's one of the best investments you can make in yourself. And I can honestly say that based on everything that I've spent in coaching and mentoring over the years, there is absolutely no way that I would be where I am today in my business, personally, professionally, spiritually, in every aspect of my life if it weren't for the, the coaching and the mentoring that I've received over the years. The problem with freelancing is the barriers to entry. And when I say barriers, I'm mostly talking about the costs. So the cost to become a freelancer are so low that it gives the false impression that there's no investment required. And the fact is that this is not like, this is not unlike other businesses. There is a cost to succeed here. Every business requires continual investment and this is no exception. Coaching is the R and D, the research and development, the education and the employee development side of your business. Just because you're a business of one doesn't mean that these things don't apply in real and out there in traditional businesses. The ones that don't invest in those areas end up with a very poor talent pool. So why would it be different for you? Why would you not invest in yourself? Look at the cost to become a freelancer and the fact that they're so low is a blessing. And then rather than saying, well, that's, you know, that's money I didn't have to spend, say, you know what, there's still a cost for entry and for success. And look at that as well. I didn't have to spend it up front, but I know that in order to continually grow, make that investment in yourself. I'm telling you, it's going to pay off in a big way as long as you come into these relationships with the right mindset, with the right expectations, with the right attitudes and the willingness to do the work. Not everyone is coachable. Not everyone understands, accepts or believes what I just shared. And that's okay. But if this resonated with you, I hope that you at least consider coaching or mentoring and listen, it doesn't have to be me. This is not a commercial for what I do. There are many wonderful coaches and mentors out there. Just look for one whose message resonates with you and reach out to them and see what they have to offer. And then see if you can schedule again a discovery call, a trial session so you can better determine if you are fit for each other other. Now, if you'd like to explore Coaching or mentoring with me? The page to visit is b2b launcher.com coaching. I offer both coaching and mentoring and different flavors in between depending on where you are in your business and what you want to accomplish. And my offerings and options are constantly evolving. So it all depends on when you're listening to this. But I do have an application process because again, I want to make sure that there's a very good fit first. I don't just take people off the street sight unseen. I want to make sure that this is the right thing, the right thing for you, the right relationship that we click with each other and I have several filters or kind of a more involved screening process just to make sure that if I do engage with someone and we do start a relationship that it's going to work and that everyone is going to win. Win. I don't do a ton of one on one coaching or mentoring and I'm often book solid for months at a time. But I am taking applications now and on and off throughout the year. So if this is something you want to explore with me and if the information on my coaching page resonates strongly with you, I invite you to submit an application. All right, so moving on to the next topic, which is gratitude. We're not going to spend a ton of time on this, but you know what, it's Thanksgiving week and this is a very, very appropriate topic and it's something that I've talked about on and off for a while. I think many of you understand the importance that I place on gratitude, but here again, just putting together the notes for this show has been extremely helpful for me and a good reminder of the fact that I need to continue practicing gratitude and in really expanding the way that I do this. So gratitude is something that I really started formalizing about 15 years ago as part of my morning routine and I varied the way that I practiced that. And again, I try to be mindful of the many blessings in my life throughout the day. But by formalizing it, by that I mean by taking specific time out of my day to formally give thanks and recognize all the amazing things, people, circumstances in my life. It forces me to really think of that and to appreciate these things and circumstances. I've been blessed with a high degree of contrast throughout my life. And these things are all relative, of course, but what I mean by contrast is that, you know, I didn't come from money. My my family was not wealthy and there were six of us, actually four brothers and sisters. And then my parents remarried so there was. I had. I actually have four stepbrothers and sisters, so usually there were six of us at any given time. I shared rooms throughout my life with my brothers and sisters. And so my parents didn't just give me things. For instance, my parents always said, we'll never buy you guys cars. If you ever want a car when you're old enough, you have to go buy your own car. And you know, being in that situation as a kid would stink sometimes. But I'm very grateful for it now because it's given me contrast. I can better appreciate the things and the circumstances in my life today because they haven't always been this way and things didn't always come easy. So I think there's been some good balance. And again, I know these things are completely relative. We were still very rich in many, many different ways growing up. So when I started formalizing my gratitude ritual, rather than focusing on the things I didn't have, what I did is I began to focus on what I did have. I have a loving family, good health, freedom, liberty, a beautiful home, wealth of opportunity, and so many other things. And what I noticed is that when I began doing this, interesting things started to happen. So not long after I began this practice, my career took off and things began falling into place. A few years later, I launched a freelance business and then I was able to leave my full time job without missing it a beat. And you know, you could easily dismiss these things as well. That was based on hard work and determination. And all those things are important, no doubt, But I really do believe that much of that came from my gratitude practice and habit. I'm not the only one who believes in the power of gratitude, and I know many of you are on board with this. As I looked more into this gratitude thing and practicing gratitude in a very mindful way, I found that all the great thinkers throughout history, all the philosophers and prophets, really made gratitude one of the cornerstones of their teachings. So I realized, you know what, there's something to this. I need to keep practicing this. And I've fallen off the wagon. And sometimes I'll get out of that habit. But I've been back on it for a while now, and I'm so glad. I try not to miss it because it's extremely important. And it's interesting when you make this into a daily ritual, part of your daily ritual, what happens is throughout the day you become more aware of all the gifts and all the blessings in your life. So it has the power of really expanding your view throughout the day, which is something that I many times haven't had, is I don't pay attention to all these amazing things and circumstances in my life. So here's how I practice it again. I do this every morning. It's part of my morning routine and I basically write it out. I write out a full page in my journal of sentences that start with I am grateful for blank. And this is a stream of consciousness exercise. I just kind of run with it. I don't stop to think too much about it. I just go with whatever I think of at the time. I mean, it could be the pen in my hand, it could be my computer, my desk, the fact that I feel great, the cost sitting next to me, whatever and whomever, I just go ahead and run with it. And I many times I repeat the same items day by day. It doesn't really matter. It's. It's all about just not stopping to, to get distracted and think about other things. You just keep that flow and that momentum. I also try to feel these things as I I is, I write them. So I'm grateful for my kids school and I just picture their school and their loving teachers who care so much and work so hard. So it's important to also kind of have that feeling and elicit that feeling, those emotions. And then many times I will also go ahead and be thankful for something or a situation that, that I don't currently have, physically don't have or hasn't happened yet, but I go ahead and give thanks for it anyway. And this is a very important point because, and this goes back to the law of attraction and all these other wonderful things that we're going to be actually talking about here very soon in December in the podcast. But I find that by, by acting as if you already have it and being grateful for it already, whatever that circumstance might be, you actually begin to attract it into your life. So this is part of attracting wonderful things and situations into your life. So what's this doing for me? Well, I've already shared some ideas, but doing it first thing in the morning helps me kickstart my day the right way. It also attracts, as I mentioned, amazing things and situations into my life. And it's made me much more aware of life's gifts as I go about my day. So it makes me more mindful, more aware of all the amazing blessings and fortune in my life. So a few lessons learned from this practice. I didn't wait to start being grateful until I reach a certain point in my career, my business, and then Start practicing that. I really believe that every success that I've achieved in every area of my life has come from my deep feeling of gratitude before I achieve that success in the physical world. So in other words, I created that success in my mind and I injected a very heavy shot of emotion into that thought, into that image by being grateful for it before I had a to chance, achieved it. So I hope you don't dismiss this idea because you think, oh, well, you know, that's easy for you, Ed, because you know you've reached a certain level of success and you know it doesn't work that way. You have to be grateful for what you have today and you have to be grateful for what you don't have yet. But you need to be grateful for it because it will help you make that a reality. It will create a feeling that will start attracting that situation into your life. Life. However you decide to do it, whether you choose to use a gratitude journal or you choose to meditate, to pray, doesn't matter. I urge you to get into the habit and try to do this first thing in the morning. If you're not a morning person, you know it's fine to do it at the end of the day, late at night. The point is to do it at a moment where you're not distracted, where it's quiet and you can focus on this practice for at least a few minutes every day. The point is, don't make Thanksgiving the only day that you give thanks. Make every day a real Thanksgiving. So I want your feedback on this. I really do. I'd love for you to comment in the comments area on the show notes page, which again is b2b launcher.com episode 31 and I'd like to know how you practice gratitude. What works for you? Do you have a habit already? Do you have a routine? Let me know what works for you now. And for those of you who don't really do something right now, Totally. Okay. I urge you to practice some of these ideas and I'd love to hear back from you on what you found. How has it changed your outlook? How has it changed the things and circumstances you attract into your life? How has it changed your awareness? I'd love to hear back from you on this. I'd love to start a bit of a discussion here on this page page and just see how it's going for you and the impact that it's had. So that's it for today's episode, folks. Again, you can grab the detailed show notes@b2b. Launcher.com Episode 31 A couple of things I want to make sure you're aware of, and the first is that I've just opened early registration for my next B2B business launcher group and this is the group training program where I teach you step by step how to launch a successful and profitable B2B or commercial writing business in 10 weeks or less. The success stories that have been coming out of this program have really been amazing and I'm excited to offer an opportunity to get into the next group early and to secure a spot before it sells out and to save yourself $500 in the process. You can learn more about this early bird discount and opportunity by going to b2b launcher.comearlybird all together no spaces b2b launcher.comearlyBird if you enjoyed this episode I would be very grateful if you shared it with friends and the easiest way to do that is to use any of the social media sharing buttons buttons that you see on the page or to go to b2belauncher.com love it would also mean a lot to me if you gave the show a quick rating or review in itunes if you haven't already. And the easiest way to do that is go to b2b launcher.com iTunes in doing so, helps elevate the show in the rankings in itunes, which increases the chances of people noticing the show and in listening to some of the episodes, people who would have never come across it before. I want to give a big shout out to some of the most recent reviewers. Shelly K. Greg Hahnstein and I apologize if I just butchered your last name. Greg Hans Hauenstein and Wendy Slocks. I really appreciate the review and it was fantastic. Really. When I read these it just totally makes my day. So thank you watching for that. That's a wrap up for today folks. Again, my name is Ed Gandhia. I thank you so much for listening and I hope you have an awesome day.

The High Income Business Writing Podcast is a production of B2B business launcher. Learn more at B2B launcher dot com.