Jennifer Phillips explains NVC's two core metaphors: the jackal is our reactive, blaming mind that criticizes and defends; the giraffe is our compassionate heart that sees from a needs-based perspective. The giraffe's long neck lets it rise above conflict to understand what everyone actually needs.
There's 2 metaphors in NVC, the jackal and the giraffe. The first is the jackal, who is our thinking brain. It's our part of ourselves that criticizes, blames, shames, judges, and often reacts from an emotional perspective. It's either towards others, towards ourselves, And the metaphor is kind of, you know, the snippy, the barky, they can bite, they tend to kind of fend for themselves and be loners and, you know, maybe just mostly be interested in getting their needs met. Where the giraffe, on the other hand, represents our compassionate brain, our heart language. And it is the metaphor because out of all the land animals, It has the largest heart, and obviously with its long neck, it can see things from a higher perspective as the observer, whereas the jackal is a little more in the subjective mind. The giraffe can also digest thistles, right? So anything that it ingests, it can digest and metabolize. So it can take criticism and convert it into compassion and have understanding about what's really going on. From the other person. So rather, where the jackal is emotionally reactive, the giraffe is more needs-based and responsive. So it's going to have a gentler response. The jackal's going to have some energy. And again, both of them are how we hear and speak to others and ourselves. So our internal jackal can be self-judging, self-loathing, and then our outward jackal can be critical and judging and blaming of others, whereas our giraffe is going to have more compassion for the needs that are alive inside of us in any given moment and also inside of others. And we're gonna do our best to create circumstances that can support the needs of both people.
