Overcoming Task Initiation: Stop Feeling Stuck!

Welcome to the Overgivers Anonymous podcast. My name is Angela Mondor, also known as the Geeky Girl. In this podcast, we're gonna be talking about some amazing things to help you get over overgiving. Hi and welcome to this episode of the Overgivers Anonymous podcast. My name is Angela Mondor and I'm also known as the Geeky Girl. As you can tell, it's still summer here, just in case you happen to be watching this later, 'cause if you're on YouTube, you can see me. If you're listening to this on a podcast, of course you can't see me, but that's okay. Just know, That it's warm out and I am dressed for summer. I want to talk to you today about overcoming task initiation challenges. Some of us have a fantastic neurodivergent brain, which doesn't allow us to get started once we get, once we get an idea. Okay, so there are lots of different layers to this. Sometimes we have a hard time coming up with an idea. Sometimes we get started after we get the idea, and sometimes we just don't have a hard time Okay, there's lots of different reasons why any number of those things could possibly be happening to you. And let's be honest, if you are neurodivergent, they probably happen to you regularly, often, and not always in the same way. I find that sometimes it can be very difficult to get started on something if I don't know exactly what I'm trying to accomplish. So I often say to people, if you are having trouble with a task, for example, and you're like, I just can't get moving with this task, chances are that when you see that task in your mind or you've written it down or you're in ClickUp and you've looked at a task, if it doesn't have an actionable item, then it stalls your brain because now you're thinking, well, what, what do I have to do next? Or what, how do I get that done? So let's say, for example, and this is different for everybody. Okay, so everybody will need a different layer. I often talk about it's difficult to— some people need a more micro version and some people need more macro and some people need a broad view. So for some people, I could say, hey, go write a blog post and they'd be totally awesome and capable of going off to write a blog post. Then you have other people who you can say, I need you to go and I need you to write out the outline of the blog post, then I need you to do the research for the blog post, and I need you to write an outline with the research, filling in the details, and then I need you to go and write the draft, and then I need you to go write— like, there's all these steps that you have to do in order to write the blog post. Not even talking about how we post it on the internet and how we do all those kinds of things. I mean, that's not— that's after. So depending on who you are, you have a different way of seeing your own, your own way of seeing it. And sometimes we need more help than other times, and that can be due to some of the things I want to talk to you about today. So here's some things that happen, maybe some challenges that you've come across. And like I said, these might be impacting you today. Maybe you've— they don't impact you ever, or maybe it's like, oh, I didn't realize that that was something that impacted me. Or it's new. It's like, that never impacted me before, and now all of a sudden it's happening. This, I find, is the hardest part. I don't know what the right word is for it. It is certainly the most unique thing, is that we can get used to a thing and then all of a sudden it breaks, like our habits or the way we do things. Sometimes as a neurodiverse human being, you're like, you do something, you do something, do something, you take one day off and then it's broken. So you'll find that some of these pieces that I'm going to talk about will come up and down, and you need to figure out for yourself what works best for you. So one of the things is time management. Some people are really good at time management, but a neurodivergent brain sometimes isn't really good at managing time or understanding what time actually means. And so when we're planning in business or we're planning getting things done for our day, it's really important to understand how much time you have and how long things take in order to get them done. It's a double-edged sword. And if you're not tracking it, if you're not paying attention to it, then you may not understand. You may be the person who writes down a list of 50 things and say, I'm going to get these done today, and you get 3 done. But at the end of the day, you feel like crap when really what's happened is you did 3 really big things that took a lot of time. So sometimes the checklist can be a bit of a misnomer in terms of what you can get done, because maybe yesterday you got 50 small things done and that was a fantastic day in your brain. So understanding your time is really important. It is valuable for you to understand, like I said, not just how much time you have to work that particular day/month/year, whatever the case may be, but also how long the things take that you need to get done. Because one day you may be able to get 3 big things done, and the next you can get 50 little things done. But it's understanding that, you know, the number may not be what you need to track. For me, for me, it's 4 hours of timed work every day. Okay, so I know that once I hit that four-hour mark, that I'm starting to really go downhill. And that could be four hours worth of calls with either clients or team members. Like that could be four hours worth of that, or it could be mixture of four hours of that, and it could be also other things that I'm doing that are task related. So you have to find what works for you. That one is my personal marker, and when I feel like I'm fading during the day, I go back into my ClickUp and see what have I been doing today. Oh geez! I'm at. 4 and a half hours. No wonder I'm exhausted. So that's what works for me. And so you need to think about what works for you and how can you track that to get that information. Now procrastination is a weird thing. A lot of times we think we're procrastinating when we're really not procrastinating. We are simply overwhelmed. Maybe you're anxious or again you're unable to decide where to start. If you are consistently writing down or in your ClickUp saying what it is that you need to get done and every time you look at that you stall because you're don't know where to start, think about how to change the verbiage of it. Instead of, if you get stalled at write the blog, maybe you need to say, you know, start with the title or whatever the case may be. What is it that's stopping you? You have to take a minute. Now, this takes time, okay? So it's important for you to understand that whole time management piece. If you have something that's stopping you and you feel like you're procrastinating it and you are simply not knowing where to start, taking the time to understand it now will actually help you save time later. So it feels like maybe you're wasting time, but Really, if you can break it down further that your brain's happy with it, next time that task comes up, it's going to be so much easier for you. So I hate the word procrastination, although we use it a bunch. For me, I don't think that most neurodivergent people aren't procrastinating, and business owners, we're not necessarily procrastinating, but we are overwhelmed. There's a whole bunch of things to do. Maybe there's things you need to do. You're tracking things that your team's doing. You're waiting for this invoice. You're waiting for that payment. You're waiting for There's so many things going on and your brain's firing in all those places. It can be a very overwhelming place to live. And so a lot of times it isn't about procrastinating. To me, procrastination is like, oh, I, you know, you want to, you need to do something, but you don't want to do it. And so you're going to sit back and wait because you're hoping somebody else gets it done. That's not typically our problem. Our problem is typically because of the overwhelm, maybe some anxiety about showing up. Maybe you're— You say you procrastinate recording content. Maybe you have anxiety about showing up on camera. There's usually some underlying reason why you are procrastinating, and that's why I use those air quotes, because I don't think it's procrastination. I really think it's something else. It's just that it's easy to label as procrastination, and perhaps maybe you've been labeled that way in the school system or with people or those kinds of concepts about maybe why you think you're procrastinating. Our focus and attention is crazy. It can be very difficult to focus on things, and it could be very difficult to bring our attention to the things that we need to, to have to get completed. I know right now in my business, I've got some really cool things I'm building with the team, and I really want to spend a bunch of time on that. But I know that I need to spend time on some other things inside my business, and I've had to give over some of those really fun brain floss things that I would love to do to my team because they can do those things, because I have other things that I have to do that only I can accomplish. So sometimes not being able to focus on what we have to do because there's this really cool shiny orb over here that we really want to spend time with, it is important for us to understand that. And I find that when I can label it and say, oh, I know I'm not focused because I'm focused on that thing over there, then it makes it easier for me to say, okay, I know I'm going to get to that, but in order to get there, I need this. It's almost like a reward system for me. I'm not the kind of person who says I'm going to go and buy a new outfit or I'm going to take myself out for a treat if I accomplish things. Most of the times I want to get to those brain flossy things. I want to get to the exciting creation mode. And so for me, that's kind of like how I keep myself in that— try to be back in that focus mode. Initiating a task in all of the— in all of this can be really difficult if it's not something that's really giving you that dopamine fix or you're not getting what you want out of the situation. It can be very difficult when you are living in an unstructured world, for lack of a better— when we are more structured and we say, this is the things that need to get done, it can be much easier. And again, you have to have some control over what it is you're trying to get done, because if you let somebody else dictate it, you might not like it very much depending on who you are as a human being. Most of us like to be in control. Now organization is a thing. It is really a big deal. There are some very serious problems if you don't have a really clear way of— what's the right word I'm trying to find right now? Control is the wrong word. But if you're thinking about how can I keep all of these things in one place, for me ClickUp is a great place. It can be very crazy if you don't have organization inside ClickUp, like if you're just dropping stuff everywhere. A lot of people find that they duplicate things, they're creating things they weren't looking before. And so it's really important to use the search feature in there to make sure you haven't already created something like it somewhere else so that you can find those other pieces and put it back together. But overall, knowing where— what your tasks are, what your deadlines are, and what you need to accomplish in order to hit those deadlines can be very difficult for our brains because specifically for the ADHD brain, if you suffer from that whole concept of if I don't see it, it doesn't exist, right? That whole concept of, well, if I don't see it, it doesn't happen and you're not used to logging into ClickUp all the time to go look for it, it might disappear, which is why a lot of ADHD people like to have written out notes or why we like sticky notes so much or having a daily journal where we can write those things. I use a twofer, so I keep things in ClickUp because if I don't keep things in ClickUp, then my brain's like, I got to remember, I got to remember. And I lose some really great energy and creativity by keeping those things there. I know I can always find them in ClickUp. So I think, oh, this is a really cool idea. dump it to ClickUp, and then I know that ClickUp's my brain for that, and I can just go and search for what I need over there. But then I also use ClickUp to organize my day. I drag those tasks over to my calendar every single day to organize what's going to accomplish that day. And sometimes I will actually duplicate that and write it down depending on how much trouble I'm having with the organization or the focus for the day. Now, executive function falls into that same place where we're thinking about, you know, the planning and organizing and strategizing. I think that, you know, your executive function, if you struggle with it, you're probably good with executive function in some ways at some time. And so it's really important to think about when do I work best with my executive function? Is it first thing in the morning, later in the evening, on Tuesdays? I don't know. When can you find time to organize things so that you can plan out better? So for example, every week, usually Monday mornings, I sit down with my calendar and I block out everything that needs to be blocked out in terms of appointments and that kind of thing. And then I can see how much time I have to work that day. And then I can plan out what are the things I want to get done this week. I do that on Monday so that as I'm moving through the week, I don't have to rely on that organizing and planning piece as much because I've done it already. I also plan monthly, quarterly, and yearly inside my business and taking the time to do that is very valuable in order to make that happen. Our working memory— sometimes we have challenges holding or manipulating information in our brain. You need to figure out what works best for you. If you're having a hard time with those kinds of things, and let's say you're writing sticky notes and they're all over the place, is that working for you or not? If it's not, how can you do things differently? There are so many different ways that we can use the tools we have today It is. I am so grateful for AI, for software. It's brilliant what, what we can use. Let it hold our memory pieces so that we don't have to hold those memory pieces. And also working with other people. If you have people that you can bounce ideas off of, Pomodoro sessions are amazing, which is like body doubling for us people with our neurodivergent brains. Emotions can also come into this. Now, emotions can come in from overwhelm, obviously, or being anxiety and, you know, in a state of anxiety and that kind of thing. But it could also be from outside sources. Maybe somebody's sick in your household. Maybe there's something going on even in the world. I know that it can be very impactful depending on what those things are, and they will impact your day. So part of it is understanding what that is. And I know there's a lot of frustration and perfectionism that comes through when we're trying to regulate these emotions. But be understanding to yourself, give yourself some grace, and make sure that you're able to plan so that you can be flexible with your time, right? Sensory overload is a huge thing. I am very, very, very sensitive to sound. Right now, I can hear somebody's in the kitchen and they're eating something or they're doing something with dishes. Somebody just walked by my door. I am very, very easily swayed by sounds. And so, I have set my life up in my business so that I can mitigate those things. I have these fantastic things called loop earbuds. They go in my ears and they help me to take the decibels down in the sound and make it not so loud. If I'm working on something that doesn't require me to type words, I can either watch a TV show or listen to a podcast or listen to music. If I'm having to type words and I need to drown out sounds that are from outside of my own head, then I need to listen to something that is instrumental only because the words are very distracting. So understanding what your sensory overload is, what is it that causes you this overload. Like, I can't work in a coffee shop. There's just too much for me. The people, the movement, it's all very, very distracting for me. I can work in a place that's smaller— not smaller, but like less busy, or a place where I can find a corner. But I also don't like to sit with my back to the door, right? So what is it that works for you? And then you find the venues, places, and tools in order to make that better for you. We have a lot of rejection sensitivity that comes up for us too. The criticism and rejection that we feel if we don't feel like we're living up to somebody else's standards, that's a really big deal. I would encourage you to try to learn not to think about what other people think of you and be more mindful about what you think about yourself. Because at the end of the day, we have to go to bed with our own brains and we talk to ourselves way more than anybody else does. And you might look at someone and think, oh my gosh, they have it all together. Maybe you think I have it all together. Truth, do not. Nobody has it all together. Everybody's struggling with something. And so when you're thinking about, you know, if you're looking at some of the big names out there like Gary Vee and you think, oh God, why can't I create as much content as him? I don't know. Do you have a team of X amount of people who are constantly following you around recording your every thought and movement? Probably not. His ability to create the content he creates is simply because he's created an environment. That allows him to be recorded for hours and hours every day. He has a team of technicians who are constantly editing and posting his content. He's a very, very hard act to follow in terms of the amount of content he creates. But when we compare ourselves with other people, we don't actually know the whole story. We don't know all the things that are happening behind the scenes. He probably has somebody that has a list of questions that says, okay, Gary, what's the answer to this question? And then he goes off on a tangent. Okay, Gary, what's the answer to this question? Maybe you need that person in your life and you could find a body double or a Pomodoro session with somebody who they can help you with that. Let's be honest, thinking about not having that rejection sensitivity isn't going to help, but building yourself up to think about who you're comparing yourself to, compare yourself to yourself. It's tough. That rejection sensitivity comes up and smacks you in the side of the head sometimes and you don't know what's coming. But at the end of the day, working on it, giving yourself that grace, giving yourself the ability to say, you know what, I am going to get better at this. That kind of stuff is going to be easier for you as you move on. It's a slow process. It's not something that's going to happen overnight because you've been struggling with it for a long time. Our motivation is generally not under question. We are motivated to do good things. We are motivated to help other people. We want to help people, but We definitely feel like sometimes there's an inconsistent effort or an inconsistent process, progress to our motivation. And at the, when we're talking about, you know, having an inconsistent effort, it could be that, you know, you see it as inconsistent, but really you just need to realize what your patterns are. What is your flow? It's like the moon and the ocean, right? When we think about the tides that are coming in and leaving our planet, not that they're leaving our planet, but you get what I mean. They're ebbs and Flows off of the beaches, that can be considered the same as what we go through. There's, there is a cycle of energy inside you, and it could be that you feel like, you know, you have more ebbs than flows. But if you were to spend time and actually spend some time like tracking it or looking at it, you may find that, oh, during those ebb times, I'm better at doing these tasks, but during the flow times, I'm better at doing these tasks. And you can become more, more successful, more productive, for lack of a better, if you are using those times in the best way possible. So it can be difficult with us because there's a perfectionism piece that comes about. My favorite saying is better done than perfect. I literally use this as much as possible. I say it as much as possible because I'm instilling it in myself. I'm the kind of gardener who literally will tell you how many seeds per square inch should be in the garden based on how many, you know, carrots or beets or whatever it is you're trying to grow. And this year I literally scratched the soil and went, better done than perfect. And I sprinkled all the seeds and I covered them all up because I learned a new way to take out the bits and pieces that aren't supposed to be there. Thinning. See, it's all good. Better done than perfect. Before, when I would thin, I would— I'd be— it'd be difficult to thin because when you'd pull it, more came out. And it was really frustrating for me. But then somebody's like, just snip off the top of the ones you don't want. I'm like, Brilliant. So for me, it was able to— I was able to let go of the perfectionism of how I plant. And it turns out the damn squirrels are digging in there anyway, and they're moving all the seeds around. That's an entirely different situation. But thankfully, I'm not in a perfectionism mode over that. But moving past perfectionism is important because it'll hold you stuck. There is nothing perfect about anything that happens on this planet. There's not one book that's been released that's perfect. There's not one product that's out on the market that's perfect. There's nothing perfect about anything. And when you let go the perfectionism. It allows you to be much more creative and allows you to have more iterations of the, you know, amazing things that you can create on this planet. Being flexible goes with that whole, you know, perfectionism piece. Sometimes we can be too flexible and sometimes we're not flexible enough, but finding that for yourself is really important. Spend some time thinking about, am I flexible enough? Am I giving myself too much room? You don't want to give yourself so much rope that you hang yourself, right? We want to give ourselves just enough room so that, oh, when something happens, we can shuffle a few things, right? If you are supposed to be on a video call with a client and, you know, 10 minutes before the video call happens, you lose power and internet. What's happening next? What's the next thing that you can do? You need to be flexible in those moments. But if you're like, ah, you know, mamby-pamby, yeah, that due date's coming and I don't want to get to it. And it's like 2 days after the deadline and you promised something to a client. You're being too flexible on yourself. Most of us don't have that problem. Most of us are being way more perfectionism-based. And of course, with our self-doubt and also the rejection sensitivity, we typically are trying to be people pleasers. So take these ideas, these thoughts about how perhaps you might have issues with your initiation of tasks or completions of things, and look at how these things impact your life. And really, you can do some amazing things with using your own brain. And just because you don't work the same way as somebody else doesn't mean to say your way isn't amazing and brilliant. I guarantee you will never find me writing something other than first thing in the morning. If I'm not writing first thing in the morning, I'm writing garbage because my brain just doesn't work really well that way. I can't find the words and my fingers can't move right to go with the words, and it just doesn't make for a very good cohesive grouping of, of words. But I'm better at doing it first thing in the morning. I can bang stuff off like nobody's business first thing. So use your ebbs and flows to your advantage. Figure out some of those challenges you might have and see how you can mitigate these challenges for yourself. And as always, if you're interested in learning more about the Rockstar Success Circle, which is where we do a lot of strategic planning and making sure that you're building a business that you absolutely love, that works with your brain, You can always reach out to us at clientcare@geekygirl.ca, and we'll drop more information down below the YouTube video. I hope you have a fantastic day, and I look forward to talking to you next week. Bye now. Thank you so much for listening to the Overgivers Anonymous podcast. Your support means the world to me. You can find show notes for this episode and other goodies at overgiversanonymous.ca. And if you enjoyed this episode or you enjoy the podcast in general, why not join us in the Overgivers Anonymous And don't forget to join Angela's Facebook group where you can connect with overgivers from all over the world. Head on over to geekygirl.ca/group. Thank you.