Identifying Values and Whole Foods Led to Overall Wellness and Balance: 70

Hey everyone, welcome to the Heal, Nourish, Grow podcast. I'm Cheryl McColgan, the founder of Heal, Nourish, Grow, and today I am here with my lovely friend Stephanie, who I met through her podcast, and she does such amazing work in the world of branding, which is a little bit unusual for this podcast, and we are going to talk about that at the end. But what is not unusual is the fact that Stephanie has really had quite a bit of a health journey that she's going to share with us today, and I think it's really relevant to this audience because Many of us are entrepreneurs or just work in a very busy job, very busy lifestyle. And I think Stephanie is going to have some great information and takeaways for us about how to better balance your life, if that's possible. Um, but anyway, Stephanie, I'll let you kind of introduce yourself and share a little bit how you got to this place where you started to really focus on your health again. Yeah.

Thank you. Thank you for the great introduction. I'm Steph Hilfer. I do go by Steph. It's not offensive to call me Stephanie. My mom birthed me Stephanie, but I love the informality of being Steph. I love that we're just already friends when you call me Steph. So I am the owner, founder, and creative director at Vim, as you said, a branding agency. And I will say Vim has been a catalyst for me to continue to focus on my own, not just health journey, but on myself. Um, so as far as like what we, what we talked about at one point was in 2018, no, excuse me, 2017, prior to starting my own business, I was at this point where I was in full-blown tears pretty much daily around eating, around using the restroom, just constant feeling gross and icky. And I know we're diving deep into some like super TMI probably stuff, but I know that your audience is probably gonna, gonna resonate with some of this. And I was just to this point of there's nowhere else to go, I have to do something. And luckily, I had my best friend since first grade and my sister-in-law, who had worked with a holistic nutritionalist coach to kind of work through all of that. Wasn't necessarily for weight loss. But obviously, I think there's always when you start to look internally at your health, I think that I definitely saw a benefit in that area as well. But I worked with this particular coach to really diagnose what was going on in my gut. We did a kind of handful of blood tests, um, stool tests, and we determined that there was some foods that were really not serving me well. And so I spent the better part of 2017, so 250 days of 2017, I essentially went whole food. Like just truly if the ingredient listing says banana, then you can eat it. But if it says flour enriched such and such oils, right? Not a single ingredient food. And, um, my nutritionalist, her, or nutritionist, her program for me was not to just go 250 days eating this clean, but I'm not a good rule follower apparently. And I, I started feeling so good. Essentially, I cut out caffeine, I cut out sugar, I cut out dairy, and I cut out gluten. And then on top of those cutouts, I just ate whole foods. And I spent that whole year feeling the most— the word I would use for it was optimized. I felt so optimized and healthy. And I know that, I know that if I hadn't been in that really healthy, beautiful place, that Vim would have never came to be. Now, VIM actually happened in 2018 after I had slowly started introducing more foods back into my world. And eventually, as probably a lot of us, I went back to like full-blown eating whatever I want to eat. And, uh, it was probably, I mean, I'm sure I had some not comfortable days in 2018, but it was definitely the early part of 2019 where I was like, I am back to that really unhealthy, you know, eating things that I know doesn't serve my body well, drinking like coffee every morning, which was the trifecta or the quadfecta bad for me. Caffeine is bad for me, my body particularly. Dairy is bad for my body particularly. Sugar is bad for my body particularly. And coffee bean in particular, the actual bean itself was an inflammatory food for me. So I was drinking this like quadfecta every single morning drink that was just setting the tone for, for my day to be not optimal. And so through feeling just like that, I finally started realizing what I didn't like about that journey was that I did lose so much weight. I lost so much weight that I lost any of the like curvature or shape that I happen to enjoy about myself. And so I set out to start working out with the intention of getting back to that diet. So that's a really long answer, but that's like in a snapshot where I'm— and where I'm at today is I'm still focusing really hard on that physical part. And I've layered in a really beautiful mental part. And so that's where I'm at today, but we could dive deeper into whatever you think would serve your audience best.

Yeah, no, you highlighted so many things there that I think are so important because part of the, the power in sharing, I think, is that you realize that you're not alone. And I think for so many people, it's, for so many of us, it's like this lifelong journey of health, right? That includes sometimes where we're quote unquote super good. Like, I'm putting that in air quotes if you're not watching on YouTube, because you're, you're being, you know, on point with your diet and whatever. But then, you know, things happen. And I'm going to guess you didn't share this and that this is just, again, pure guess. But then, you know, when you started your business, starting a business is very stressful and very demanding. And so I'm sure for a time your focus shifted much more to your business and kind of away from your health journey. But the point of that all is to say is that it is a journey and that we just keep coming back to it. Like I shared recently, I think I'm going to be on my maybe 7th weightlifting session since I started up again. And it's something that I probably started 5,762 times in my life for whatever, for whatever reason, weightlifting and strength training has just never been something I've been able to get to stick because I love being outside and I'd rather just like, I love going, I'd rather go on a 10-mile hike than be in the gym for half an hour. It's just the way I am, but I realized the importance of it. So it's just. Kind of keep coming back to that. But anyway, I think one of the things that you highlighted there as well, and maybe you could share a little bit more about this, is that wheat in particular can be so inflammatory for people and damage the gut lining. And so once you started to, you know, make some of these changes, you figured out what you had sensitivities to. Can you share kind of the effects physically and mentally when you shifted away from those? Like, were you really able to tell? A huge difference in your body?

Yeah. So the first week I was prepared by my nutritionist. She was, you know, she really explained to me this first week is gonna be a bit of a detox. So I was prepared to be frustrated and maybe discouraged. And it was a challenging first week, but I will say within the first 24 hours I immediately started seeing changes in my gut. And then within the first 3 days I started to change, feeling better just just kind of lighter. And then within a week, my mood started shifting. I felt clearer. I felt once again, optimal. And I also got to this point where, I mean, I did get to this point to be transparent that I wasn't eating enough. And so we did work through, you know, how to, how to do something that's that strict, but still get enough calories in. And I did lose 30 pounds. So everyone I talked to is like, "Well, clearly you were in a calorie deficit." But I was eating so much food. My plates were so filled that my husband was like, "Are you going to eat all of that?" And I was like, "Yes, I am. I know I'm going to eat it." I have pictures of like these full plates, like lobster tails, steak, like basically a whole head of broccoli, a sweet potato, and I would eat every ounce of it. And I felt, I felt full and I felt fulfilled. And I know that I was eating enough calories, but my body was just using every single thing that was in me. So when I said earlier that I know that Vim wouldn't have became, you know, it wouldn't have happened was because when it started, it wasn't me alone. I had a friend who approached me about starting a business. And like I said, I was about, maybe 6 months off of get kind of reintroducing foods. And I still felt so optimal. I still felt energetic. I had clarity. My mental space was just in such a good spot that I would've never said yes to that if she had asked me today. Well, maybe today, but like that prior, right? When I said I was in full-blown tears, it was April 17th, 2017. I will never forget that day. I finally made that. That was the day I made the commitment. If you had asked me a day prior to that about starting a business, I would have said absolutely no. I'm in no place. I don't have energy. I don't have my spark, my creativity. So I feel like it's a kind of a roundabout way of answering your question. But the answer is like, I absolutely within 24, 3, and 7 days or 24 hours, 3 days and 7 days, felt big shifts and those were big enough to push me into sticking with it.

Mm-hmm. And then, you know, life intervenes, like we talked about, it's a journey. So what really brought you back to, okay, I need to do this again. Was there a particular event or was there a certain way you were feeling or something that happened in your business where you just had this shift again? Like, hey, I need to get this focus back on my health again.

Yeah, um, I mean, I will say I have like clearly some body dysmorphia because I am the heaviest I've ever been in my life, and I feel wonderful about that. Uh, do I want to lose weight, and do I want to be a little healthier in that department? Yeah, but when I look at myself, I still feel really proud of, of me. But at the same time, I wasn't feeling good. I, I— there, it's so hard. I know you get it, and I'm sure your audience gets it, but this, like, just not feeling good in your own skin and knowing what you're putting in your body is not serving you, it was just this constant, like, reminder. And before, my body image pushed me so much to make these— some of these decisions in life. And maybe it was my age, um, You know, I'm sure there's lots of reasons why we use looking a certain way to fuel us to make healthy decisions. But I was at this point where I just knew that I wasn't showing up for myself in the best way. And I do want to, and I still do. It's still part of my journey, which I love that we're talking about this being a life— lifelong, long journey. I do still want to go back and prioritize my food intake and what I'm eating. In conjunction with lifting weights. But it was, I'll be honest, it was seeing a couple particular people on my feeds showing up and women in particular working with my trainer now showing up every day, recording themselves, putting it out there and being really transparent about, I don't know what I'm doing, or I'm just learning what an RDL is, or I, you know, this was a heavyweight for me, so I'm not going to do that next time, whatever. Just really transparent. And I reached out to her and I said, you know, who are you working with? Can I get their information? I'm really inspired. And I, I'm very low— I'm like you, super low impact, right? I want to hike, I want to do yoga, um, if I can stroll with my dog, swim, paddleboard, like You name a low-impact exercise or sport, that's my jam. Um, and I never— and I look at weight training and I always thought that's too tough for me, that's high impact, that's heavy. I never considered how much of a low impact— and, and I could be wrong, right? Somebody in the fitness world could tell me that's not true, but for me it fits within what I think is low impact. Um, you know, like circuit training or some of these boutiques that have you hooked up to a heart monitor and they're like, go, go, go, go, go. That to me, even if you're doing weights in that, to me, I consider that high impact. I've tried some of those. I've tried cycling. Um, too high. I love mountain biking, by the way, but cycling and those kind of boutique circuit, like heavy, heavy, like go, go, go, fast-paced environments, not for me. My heart races and my heart heart rate gets so elevated when I lift, I don't need a coach screaming at me, telling me to go, go, go, go, go. Now, I'm not knocking that because I know that there are a lot of men and women who thrive off of that, and that for them, for their mental space, for their body, for what they're looking to achieve, it's a beautiful fit. But for me, this scary, not-for-me thing of weightlifting seeing somebody else, and that's why I love your show, right? I love that you're giving people an opportunity to just be real and tell their story. Seeing somebody else doing something that to me felt so, uh, I'm gonna say not feminine. We don't see a lot of females out there lifting weights. Um, too, it seemed hard and heavy. Um, seeing her talking about, yeah, that was hard, so I'm gonna do this Next time, or that was, I didn't ever think I could do that, but look at me now comparing, seeing comparisons from her first January hip thrust to her July hip thrust and seeing her progression. It really was inspiring. And I just, I've learned. So when somebody very early on when I started Vim, somebody asked why, like, why are you starting your own company? And I know this is like the most backwards answer. People might think this, but I said, and I stick to it, is it's not my ultimate why, but reason for me starting it was I want to be self— we have such a negative connotation around the idea of being selfish. And for me, starting my own business was me allowing myself to be the priority, myself to be the priority to do the business how I want, to prioritize what I need as a human to show up for my people and run my business the way I want. I wanted to, you know, just be selfish in my own mental health and my physical health and put me first. And I think as a woman, right, we don't do that a lot. And then I think in society around careers and business, you don't hear a lot of people saying that, oh, I want to serve others and I want to help others succeed and Yes, I absolutely do. But I was at that point where I wasn't putting the mask on myself first, you know, and I knew I needed to do that. So yeah, once again, kind of a tangent roundabout way of all that, but no, but I love that.

And I wish that there was a better word, like not a better, but a different word than selfish because it's, it's not, I mean, I think you hit the nail on the head and I've quite often said this in the past, you really can't serve others when you're not taking care of yourself. So if you're not putting on. You know, the perfect analogy, like you said, is putting on your oxygen mask before you put the mask on your kids and whoever else. You're not going to be effective. So I just wish there was a different word. Maybe we can come up with a word for that together. I mean, between your branding brain and my marketing brain, you would think we could figure out a better word than selfish. Yeah. So to go back to one thing that you said, and I just want to— for one, you have inspired— this is one of the reasons I wanted to get you back on or to talk to you again is because you've inspired me when you post your workouts and I see that you're lifting again, I am like, Oh, I need to do— you know what it does? It's— sharing is so powerful. And so I just want to thank you for putting that out there because that woman that inspired you, you're passing that along now that you're sharing your stuff. So I really appreciate that.

Um, thank you.

But so let's talk about a little bit about, you know, you hit on a lot of things there with prioritizing yourself. Now, not everybody has their own business and maybe has the power to change that in this moment, but were there Any things that you learned along the way that could translate to, say, somebody in a corporate job or that does have a boss that don't run their own business? Were there things that you found that you could maybe incorporate that can still help people find more of that balance in their work versus their personal life?

Yeah, I know this is going to sound maybe like I'm trying to push an agenda here, but I, it's so powerful for me and I'm biased because my world is branding. But whether or not you are a corporate brand, a personal brand, or just a human, the work that we do to help personal brands, corporate brands understand their depth is, was one of the most fulfilling and powerful exercises that I did for myself that has continued to be my, my lens that I look through and my litmus test that I run through every single day. To make better decisions. And so let me explain what I mean by that. So one of the simple exercises that, um, we do with our clients is we help them establish values. So if you're watching on YouTube, this is like the most uncreative or well-designed thing ever, but this is a sticky note with my handwriting of my values: enthusiasm, positive, intention, visual, excellence, and peace. And so for me, This exercise of working through and establishing this for me was incredibly freeing. I'm a lot. Maybe today since we're talking about, you know, some things that aren't my like normal jam that I geek out about, even though they're totally me and I'm living them and I'm learning to love them. When you get to know me, I'm pretty enthusiastic. I'm a lot. I talk a lot. I'm a nerd. I talk about weird things that I think— like I geek out about the color of a straw at Jimmy John's. Like, I'm just a lot and I I used to get worried that that enthusiasm and this, I sometimes, and I used to with like a negative connotation, I used to call myself like a positive Polly, you know, like, oh, you're just so positive. Everything you talk about, just you turn it into a positive somehow. And I think I found that people, I worried people found those things negative of me or judged them to be fake. And those are just having them written down and being like, this is your permission slip that this is you. This is not only your brand. You, you fuel these words from a piece of you that is important to live authentically. So enthusiasm and positivity are two things that every time I'm making a decision, should I come on a podcast? Should I take on that client? Do I want to go for a hike or do I want to go do the circuit training my friend asked me to go to? I look at them and I look through— I literally, like, once again, if you're watching YouTube, I think like my words are on these glasses here. And now that I put them on, I look through them like they're their own individual layered lens. And I think if I'm not feeling enthusiastic or positive or all the rest of my words about this particular decision I have to make, then I need to stop and think about Does that truly serve me and what I set out for? When I said I want to be selfish, these words are selfish to me. These are important enough to me that I'm going to reserve saying no or reconsidering a situation if it doesn't align with these. I also have really high, um, atypical, A-type, high, uh, what's the word I want? Like very high high vibe— how come I can't think of the word I want? Um, really strong, pressured words of intention and excellence. And those are words that are very true for me. Um, they're not— I'm not saying that as a value system for me personally excellence means I'm perfect all the time. In my actual write-up with the, what these words mean to me, I have a cautionary about excellence being something that can actually get you out of alignment and can force you to think perfection over progress instead of progress over perfection. So, but then all of these really high energy, atypical, atype vibe, personality, you know, words. I've balanced with peace. Peace is that incredibly important value. It's not last because it's the least important. It's the one that after you read those, it's the reminder that, listen, you still need to be in peace with all of this. You need to feel good about being able to be— I, I felt like sometimes with enthusiasm and positive, if I came on and I was a little more subdued and a little bit more calm with even how I speak. I felt like it didn't, it wasn't authentic. All of a sudden I'm not being me. But I do have this side where I can just kind of chill and be quiet and be a little calmer. And I used to think someone's going to think I'm not being myself or I'm not being me. And by creating that balance word, um, into my own value systems, I can honor those times that I am peaceful, that I need to seek peace. Um, and I also think of peace as this, like, do I feel really good about the relationships, the things I'm doing? Am I at peace with them? So it was kind of a long answer, but if you're listening and you're not feeling good about your health, your fitness, your mental space, this introspective work that I do for brands, you can do for yourself. And it's incredibly freeing when you take the time to do it. Now, I know it's easy for me to say that because I do it professionally. But, you know, it's, it's really just sitting down and maybe even if you're a journaler, just writing a bunch of words that matter to you, and then maybe free write for 5, minutes. That's probably a long time to free write, but just free write, just words over words that pop into your mind. And then take a second to see where the commonalities are. Like if you say the word, you know, joy over and over again and you didn't even realize you wrote it 7 times, you know, look into that deeper and see if that matters to you. I don't know. Does that kind of hit the nail on the head on what you were looking for? Does that help?

No, it's Such a powerful practice. And I'm so glad that you brought it up because it's something that I actually, um, on my website, Heal, Nourish, Grow, if you look up, if you just go to the website and type in what is ultimate wellness or type in ultimate wellness, it's kind of what it is, is what it's something, it means something different to everyone. But the way that I have people identify and get in touch with that is pretty much that exercise that you just mentioned. And it's, uh, kind of called like a 10-year Values and Goals worksheet or whatever, but it's, um, it starts with identifying those words that kind of identify your core values. And so if you're not, without giving away your secret sauce, because obviously this is what you do with them and for branding, but if somebody wanted to approach that, so you said kind of just sit down and pick words that resonate with them, because I just love to hear how your process is maybe a little bit different than what I do with people.

Yeah.

So you write down those words, you identify what's important to you, and then— so you, then you wrote them on your Post-it note. Can you say a little bit more about— because I think this is where it's a really powerful practice— how keeping in alignment with those words guides your daily decisions? Because it's getting you to your ultimate goal in the future, whatever those ultimate 10-year goals you identified, kind of, it makes day-to-day decisions easier. So I'd love for you to just maybe say a little bit more about that.

Yeah, the way we do it here, you know, for our clients is a little different than, you know, what I had shared that a listener could do. What we do is so much more in deep— in depth. So we actually spend a full day, 8 hours working through several different exercises. Um, not because it takes— well, it does take that long. It's because I help poke and prod and pull out of my clients deeper things than they usually share. I think society has made it— and I don't know who to blame. I don't know. Let's just not blame anyone. I think we just have a tendency to shortchange some of the amazing thoughts and feelings we have. I say that— I tell my clients, the goal of that day is to get the things out of your head, out of your heart, and out of your gut, and out to— out on a super messy platter. Just get it all out. We walk around with these beautiful thoughts and goals and dreams and ideas about how we approach the world, how we run our business. And I keep saying business because, guys, I understand, like, that's my world. But every single one of you, no matter what you do, you have a brand. Now, does brand— do we associate that with dollars? Yes. But that's not always the case. Personal brands is like the new buzzword for your resume. It is the reputation that you have, whether you control the narrative of that or not. What branding does on a monetary place is help use that to convert, you know, people who get into our world into a client. But as a personal brand or as a human just wanting to benefit from what you're hearing today, it's really about introspection and leaning in and making sure that you feel like you have the permission slip to be who you are. But how do we know what that is if we don't spend time diving deeper into it? So we spend a full 8-hour day. It's not a secret sauce. We work through several different exercises that I offer on my website. It's— I know I don't hold it. I don't hold it as a secret because I know that people don't spend the time to do this. I've had clients come to me and money was no issue. But the moment I told them they have to sit down with me for 8 hours, then became an issue. You know, the moment I told him, I'm going to ask you what your why is, we're going to talk about in depth, like, things you've never probably shared with others, then all of a sudden, they start to pull back. So, so yeah, it's really not— there's no wrong way to go about it. But the way we do it is we start with Simon Sinek's Golden Circle. So if you've ever read Simon Sinek's Start With Why, or if you've seen his TED Talk, Start With Why, we, we start there and we're not recreating the wheel. There's such a powerful exercise to dive deep into what it is we do, why we do it, or how we do it and why we do it. So that's the very first exercise. And in our 8-hour day with our clients, we tend to take about half that day on Exercise 1.

Wow.

That's how much depth we go through. And if you are a mom listening to this, if you are a business owner listening to this, if you're anyone listening to this, taking that time, even if you're not a business owner, it's, it's truly the words I've had for clients. I always ask after that discovery, I always ask for feedback then because I want to know, how was that for you? We have a lot more to go through, but how was just that for you? And the words I've heard were transformative, um, uh, cathartic, right? Um, and completely life-changing. And so I hold that really dear, right? I started earlier saying I want to be selfish. And by being selfish, I've been able to help others put themselves first and give them the permission slip that it's okay. So I was, once again, I feel like all my answers are long.

Hey, that's the format of a podcast, right? They're meant to be long. Otherwise, okay, good. We wouldn't have a show.

Yeah, we're not on TikTok.

Right. So, oh gosh. Yeah. I, you know, I'm, I'm starting to, I don't know about you, but I'm starting to appreciate this long form. Content a little bit more here lately. Um, I've had this kind of interesting struggle with Instagram and the content there, and I'm just finding a lot more personal growth and appreciation for these conversations that I get to have with people like you and talk about, you know, their business and their health and just the things that have transformed their lives. And then, you know, producing longer content for myself, like on— we're doing more stuff on YouTube, which is a very, very scary place. I've talked about that before. Um, but you know, it's putting yourself out there. And I think, uh, to your point, when you do this inner work and you have these kind of goals for ways to take care of yourself, and then in turn being able to help others through doing that, that you become slightly more insulated from the opinions or Yes. Thoughts of others. And it allows you to just, you know, do your good work in the world and be less affected by the outside noise or by what other people think you should be doing or, or their commentary or their criticism. Usually, let's be real, online.

Yes. Yeah. Everyone has an opinion for sure.

Yes. So Steph, before we wrap it up for today, can you please share with people where they can find you online, the name of your business and the website, of course.. And then if they want to connect with you just more personally after hearing, you know, your health story or follow along with you as you work out.

Yes. Yes. Well, thank you for telling me that those videos inspire you. I actually, in the beginning of this year, decided I would switch that content to my personal page because I felt I, even with my own, right, as a branding person, I guess all of a sudden questioned, you know, is this actually valuable for people? Do they want to see this? And so that's really validating to have that reminder that it's good. And I have shifted back, I have shifted back to posting that there. But yes, so there is @getvim. So if you want to get a hold of VIM, you can find me on all the socials, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Facebook at @getvim. Now VIM stands for Visual Intentional Integrated Marketing. So VIM is spelled with two I's. It's very similar to the English word vim, which means enthusiastic, high spirited, energetic, but it is spelled with two I's. So make sure you check that out. We are also at Get Vim, or excuse me, we're also online, www.getvim.com. And yeah, I am still very immersed in my brand. So when you see things, that's me. So interact, DM, shoot me an email, all the things, you will actually get me. I had one person show up, for a consult, and they were taken aback that it was me on the other line. And I was like, I, and I realized right then I need to show my face way more because we're, we are a beautiful team over here. We have several people who help make things run around here, but, um, you're gonna see me. You're gonna show up and I'm gonna be on the other end. So I'm excited to get to chat to your listeners.

Yeah. And if, if people didn't quite catch just how good of a branding person that Stephanie is, like her whole thing about the name of the company and the matching. Like, if you didn't get all that, pay attention because she's very, very good. And also you do share a lot of really fun, uh, behind the scenes content sometimes with your clients and stuff. I'll catch that you're doing a photo shoot for the day with their brand and working on colors and stuff, and it's just all very interesting. So highly encourage you to go follow Steph over at Get Them Everywhere. And, uh, thank you again so much for coming on today and sharing more about your story.

Yes, thank you for having me.