#278: THIS Is How You Set Yourself Up For Success in 2023, With Heather!

Come on this journey with me each week when you join me, we are going to chase down our goals, overcome adversity, and set you up for a better tomorrow. Fasten your seatbelt. I'm ready for my close up. Hi, and welcome back. I'm so glad you're back here with me this week. Okay. I love getting DMs and messages from people who have read my books. It makes me feel so happy and it just encourages me that I'm on the right path. It tells me, okay, you're doing, you're doing the right thing. And I always try to lower expectations on myself because I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself. I'm sure you may be the same way. And I'll say if. If my work just helps one person and makes a difference in one person's life, that's enough. That to me, that's everything.

Right?

That's amazing. Incredible. And so I received this DM. I'm actually going to share two different DMs with you because I think it's important to note that no matter how bleak your situation can be, it can change. And it's up to you to be the person that changes it. Right? So, okay. I received this on Facebook, actually a Facebook dm. Hey, Heather, your last post prompted me to finally share something with you. Please share things with me, guys. I love hearing it. It makes me so proud of you and happy and excited. Okay, so six months ago, I was in a very dark time in my life. I found myself in an emotionally abusive marriage. I started to use the strategy of leaving the room whenever we would have an argument. And when I would leave the room, I would go somewhere quiet and I would read Confidence Creator. That's my first book. This book is a game changer, by the way. I love it. I'm so proud that people love it and it's changed so many people's lives. Super proud of that. Okay. Maybe because I could hear your voice when I was reading the book. Your message called to me from the grave of my foreign, more confident self. I was reminded of what I deserve and how my actions will either make that possible or make it impossible. That's so true. In February, I finally left, which in this case meant packing my bags and flying from one continent to another to go home. In June, I finalized my divorce. While there's much to be learned, there are also very few people who have walked in my shoes that I know. In short, when I cheer for you, it comes from the heart. Keep up your work. It's truly inspiring and life changing, and I'm so grateful for that message. And what I want to share about that is this is somebody who had lost their confidence. They had known at one point in their life what confidence looked like, and they had lost it. And that happened to so many of us. That happened to me when I was working side by side with a woman that despised me. It happened so slowly and quietly, which I think is probably similar to what this woman's writing. She didn't marry this person knowing it was gonna be an abusive marriage. Right. She didn't sign up for that. I would imagine. I would imagine she signed up for the fairytale and, you know, the happy relationship and what you're hoping for, however slowly. Usually it happens slowly over time. You start noticing things that are. Wait a minute. That's weird. This is what it was like for me in corporate America. I started noticing, you know, at first, this woman was smiling when I met her. And then slowly, it was, oh, you knew she was talking behind your back. You knew she was stabbing you in the back. You knew she was setting you up. You knew she was creating obstacles for you. I'd address it, she wouldn't respond. It just got worse and worse and worse. But it happens really quietly and slowly. Do you feel me on that? So it wasn't like one of those moments you just jump out and you're gonna knock somebody out because they spit in your face. Right? I'm sure that was the same with this woman in this abusive marriage. So it can almost seem more challenging, right? When things are happening quietly, you start questioning yourself. You're like, is this me? Is this normal?

Wait a minute.

Why is this happening? And as you start questioning yourself, especially if you're keeping it to yourself and you're the only one that's observing this, you might start diminishing yourself. And that's definitely what I found was happening to me. I thought if I just shrink back for a little bit, maybe this lady will go away. Maybe she'll leave me alone. Maybe this craziness will end. And it sounds like that's what happened to this woman too, is that over time, she allowed it to chip away at her confidence. So you're not alone. Whether you're in a work environment, a personal relationship, maybe it's a relationship with a relative, right? And you're having to deal with this at the holidays. You are not alone. It happens to so many people. The key is you have the power to change it. Information, application, transformation. I've been talking about This a lot lately. You've gotta expose yourself to new information at frequency, which means often, not just once. Don't just, you know, listen to an uplifting podcast or audible book once. Right? You need to surround yourself with that encouragement so it keeps you focused on your goal, focused on that, you know you're going in the right direction. For a long time when I was in corporate America and I was in that negative environment and culture, right, and it was a toxic culture, it wasn't. It permeated beyond this woman treating me badly. I mean, it was happening all across the company. Again, I wasn't. I had blinders on back then. I just wasn't seeing it. Part of the reason is because I thought I had to be there. I thought I was successful because of the company. I wasn't giving myself credit. Which is a whole other issue around lacking confidence and not stepping into your power, right? So don't give your power away. If you're successful in something, it's because of you, not because of who you work side by side with or what products you're selling. It's because of you. And I know that for a fact because I felt that way at one point in time and I'm so far removed from it now. And I know that is not a truth, although some people might want you to believe it. So keep surrounding yourself with the right people that encourage you, that want to lift you up, that want to challenge you to get to the next level, that want to cheer you on and will call you out when you need to be called out and appreciate constructive criticism. Even though in some moments it can be tough to take, as long as people have a good heart and have your interest at heart, all of that's going to help you. It's a problem when the people don't and you know the difference. Look within. You can see pretty quickly. Hey, hey, wait a minute. This has happened slowly over time, but this stinks and this person does. I don't get good energy from them and they're not treating me respectfully. I recently had a really good friend of mine contact me who I hadn't talked to in a little while and explain a situation that was going on in his marriage. And I just. I was shocked to hear the last time I'd spent time with this couple. They were both really confident and positive and they seemed like they're going through a really tough time, but doing so in a silo where they weren't sharing what was going on with other people, they started thinking it was normal and it was so surreal to me to just see how over a finite period of time, when you put yourself in a silo and you hold onto these thoughts and you don't expose yourself to uplifting people and people helping you to grow and giving you perspective, you can start thinking in unhealthy ways. I've certainly been there. You know, I'm reading these DMs, and I see other people have been there. You're not alone. Please seek out people to encourage you. And if you don't have those people in your life, you seek out the podcast, seek out the books, right? There's so many of them out there. The TED Talks. There's so much content out there. Get the information that's gonna support you and uplift you. Then apply it to your life and watch transformation occur. Information, application, transformation. Set yourself up for the best year you can. For 2023, that means getting rid of the negative people in your life. Now. Overcome your villains, right? You gotta fire those villains, Surround yourself with the right people. And you do that by creating space. When you get rid of the negative people, you create space for the positive people to show up and arrive. They will not arrive as long as you have these negative people blocking you and you're dimming your light, right? You're not gonna find your team and your crew. Okay, so then that was one DM that I wanted to share with you. That was the result of my first book, Confidence Creator, which, again, as I mentioned, I mean, it's incredible to me, the messages I've gotten about that book. I'm super, super proud. Okay, then today on ig, I hope you feel proud of you too, by the way. You know, take a look at the feedback you get from people and the good that you're doing. And if you're not feeling that way, see who you can help around the holidays, you know, see if you can drop toys off to a toy drive. See if you can go volunteer somewhere, you know, and aid in any small way you can. That is a surefire way to feel amazing about yourself. Anytime I do something to help others, it makes me feel so proud of who I am and so grateful, you know, for that opportunity. And it helps you kind of forget about the small things that you might be obsessing over or thinking about, and instead put the focus on the right things, which is doing good in the world, bringing joy to the world, seeking joy, being a light in a dark time. And as you move forward and do that, you will feel more proud of yourself. You will Feel more uplifted and you'll vibrate at a higher level and start attracting higher level people to you. That I know is fact. Okay, so I got a DM today that said, hey, just wanted to say thank you for the reminder that it's okay to dial up my look even if it makes others uncomfortable. I realized this morning I keep toning down my look because I can't be, quote unquote, too much. And that's just not true. Here's to turning over a new leaf and enhancing a style that will fuel my confidence.

Fact.

I love that. So here's the thing. You can never be too much for the right people. When you're around the right people, they're gonna challenge you to go bigger, go for more, dial up your look, but get you to step into uncomfortable to challenge you to go for more. They're not gonna be the ones saying, you're gonna wear that to work. That's not a good idea, right? That was the voice of the woman that I used to work side by side with. You know, you're gonna wear a dress and your hair in a ponytail. Oh my gosh. You know, I was rocking like this adorable look and I was super proud of it. And she was just trying to get me to second guess myself. And it worked, right? I did. Because my confidence was diminished. I would let those negative remarks hit me hard. And for a while, I started showing up in pants, suits only, and, you know, with my hair in a bun and trying to be someone I wasn't. And I can promise you this. The more you try to show up as someone that you are not, the more you are an imposter. The only way you will ever truly be an imposter in your life is by trying to show up as someone other than you. Show up as you. Rock that look, rock your confidence, whatever that looks like for you, but be the best version of you so that you attract the right like minded people back to you. As I was showing up as a watered down version of myself, I was attracting the wrong people towards me. Wrong personal relationships, wrong business relationships. Because I wasn't being the real me. I was trying to be someone else. Cause I thought that would make someone else comfortable. That is an epic fail. And that is denying the world of your unique traits and gifts and blessings that you have. Don't hide those from the world. Shine them and shine them bright. Because we live in a world that needs some light, that needs some goodness. And it's all within you. You, you've just got to be willing to step into the confidence that you got inside and start rocking that look, rocking your vibe, rocking your words and knowing you can never be too much for the right people. That is a straight up fact.

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Those are just a couple of quick notes I wanted to share with you that I want you to know. I love getting your messages. I love when you leave me reviews. I read them all. I'm super grateful. I love the feedback and I just wanna say thank you for taking the time to send me your notes. I love hearing about your stories and I love hearing about your accomplishments, your challenges. And again, it reaffirms that we're all in this together and we're all so much more alike than we are different. So know that you're not alone and I am here cheering you on. If you don't have anybody else in your life cheering you on right now, know that I am and I'm here for it. And I'm here for your big bold moves. And you can never be too much. So the other thing I wanted to get into today was I was reflecting on first thing in the morning. I have an intention every day, right? And I hope that you set your day up for success with intention. Every day. I have a few different papers that I have in a drawer that I pull out and I read them and it's to remind me, you know, what I'm grateful for. It's to remind me of what I'm going for, what I want to achieve, what I want to do with my life, who I am, who I want to show up and be every day, right? Just really reminding myself. And it's a discipline to have this intention and routine each morning. I mean, it literally takes me a couple of minutes. It does not take long at all. But it helps get my day off on the right foot and it helps me be really mindful about who I am and where I'm going and what my purpose is, right? And bring me back to, to this idea that we're here to make a difference. We're here to make the world a better place. Instead of we're just here to go through the motions. Because we're not here to go through the motions. We're here for so much more than that. And I hope you have this intentional practice in the morning. If you don't, oh, my gosh, try it for 30 days, you will totally keep it. Cause you will see changes happening in your life that really set you up for success. And you're gonna feel proud and you're gonna do more good, and it's. You're gonna build momentum on it. So I was reading through. I read through the same. For the most part. It's the same stuff every day. But occasionally I'll add some new things in, or I had someone send me a prayer that I really love. So I added that prayer, and I've added some things in along the way. I've been doing this for over a year now, and it's been so helpful and really set me up for a great mindset. It's a great routine and for more success. So give it a shot. Anyhow, when things happen in my life that are like big moments, I write them down. I encourage you to write them down. Because what happens is as we move far away from them, we forget the impact that they had. Right? So a good example. I'll give the analogy of I shared with you that I had fallen down Thanksgiving week and I had this bump on my head. Now, when it first happened, the bump was big, right? And over the next two weeks, it got a lot smaller. But I forget how big it was when it happened, because I look in the mirror every single day and I'm like, oh, there's still a bump there. That's so annoying. My son said to me today, he said, mom, there's barely any bump there. Don't you remember how big it was the day it happened? And I had forgotten, right? And that's so true of not only a bump on your head or, you know, a challenge you might be facing, but looking back in your life at big, challenging moments. And then as time passes, you forget, oh, my gosh, this was a huge deal that I overcame this. Or this was a huge revelation. I wanna remind myself of this. So it's really important in the moment when you're going through something to write something down so that you know what was really transpiring. Because your memory will not serve you to the degree that you think that it actually will. Memories, unfortunately, are not accurate, right? Because we get busy time passes, and we simply forget. So write these things down. Write these milestones down. So one of these milestones for me over the last year, this last year has been incredible for me. Truly one of the most transformational years of my life. And that's for so many reasons. A Big part of it is because of my faith and strengthening my relationship with God and finding my church and so many amazing things that have happened for me. But there's more to it than just that. That is a big, big part of it. And that was really driven by my son, who's incredible and. And I'm so proud of. But that was one aspect of it. As this journey's gone on for me this year and this transformation's happened for me, which I'm so grateful for, I have noticed different things. One of the things is the impact prayer has had on my life. One of these things is the impact intention has had on my life. There's all these different things that I've incorporated in a fierce way in 2022 into my life in a bold way, which had been in my life a little bit before, but not to the level and commitment that they are now. And I've recorded. Cause I write down everything. Cause I'm a maniac. But I've recorded examples for myself so that I don't forget. Right. If something's working, I don't wanna forget. And so I had written down this example. And it's one of the things that I read each morning and I'll share it with you. I might have shared this actually on a previous episode. I'm not sure if I have. Yeah, actually, I'm pretty sure I did. A while ago. I had wanted to sell my condo for years, and I just never thought I was going to be able to because I had bought my condo in 2005 when the market was at. Was the height of the market right before, you know, the 08 crash. So I had just decided that, I guess I was going to own that condo forever and I'd have to end up renting it out and, you know, buy something else, whatever. I just kind of gave up on it. But in my heart of hearts, I really wanted to sell that condo. Cut to. I really started, you know, praying about it. I started asking God to show me a way to show me signs. Anyways, the most incredible things started happening. And this is all back when, at the beginning of the year in 2022. First of all, I had fired a major villain from my life at the beginning of the year, which cleared space for opportunity and positive things to happen. I really recommitted to my faith. I started going to church every Sunday with my son, really diving in so much more to faith and God and my relationship with God, to prayer. And it had a huge impact as well as I'm always reading different personal development books and I'm always researching and you know, I wanna be the best version of myself that's possible out there. Right, Which I'm sure you do as well. And so information is really a cornerstone to that. Whether you're reading the Bible or you're reading Joe Dispenza's books, or you're reading my books, you know, it doesn't matter. There's what I'm finding the older I get and the more knowledge I've accessed. And I have read so many books over the last five years, it's incredible. I read almost a book a week because the podcast, I read so many books, but that started me down a journey of wanting to, you know, garner more information and access information. And what I'm starting to see is whether it be there's a through thread, whether I'm reading the Bible or I'm reading a book from the 1950s or I'm reading Ask and it's given. There's so much in common between all of these works which says to me, everyone operates on a different frequency, right? Some people connect with the way I say things and my examples, some people don't at all. And this is why it's important that there are multitudes of books out there and writings. For me, when a book connects with me, I start seeing, oh, I remember this from another book. Oh, this is a truth. Because I remember finding this from another successful person's book. And I start connecting the dots in ways that are so powerful and so impactful. So it really helps me to garner information from different sources and then put it together in a way that works for me in my life. And that's what I hope for, for you. You know, you might read a bunch of different books and say, well, part of this works for me, part of it doesn't. That's fine, right? Take the pieces that work for you, test and try them, apply them to your life so that you implement some change, hold yourself accountable and see what happens. And so as I moved through 2022 incredible life changing things happened in my life that, I mean, I can't even go into all the detail because there's not enough time and it's just insane. But that one example I'll use of wanting to sell my condo, praying about it, writing it down with intention, asking God for it, asking the universe for it, right? And then suddenly things started showing up in the most incredible, miraculous. There's no other way to say it, but it was a miracle and there were A number of miracles this year for me, and I'm so grateful for that. So what that shows me and why I'm so glad I write this stuff down is I'm gonna keep praying. I'm gonna keep going to church. I'm gonna keep strengthening my relationship with God. I'm gonna keep reading the Bible. I'm gonna keep reading these other works and figuring out more works that I can read that I feel like are in line with the same messaging right? Around ask and you shall receive, around energy and around removing negative people and negative situations and spending time in joy. And it's just. It's incredible to me that when we write things down and witness these miracles that happen in our life, when we write them down and revisit them daily, or at least weekly, we remind ourselves, hey, stay close to this. Stay close to your church. Stay close to your faith. Put your faith over your fear. Choose joy, right? It's reminding me on the daily to stay on this path so that I won't veer from it, which I had done before, and I veered from it because negative people came into my life, or I felt stuck, or I got afraid and I started leaning into fear, right? I made choices that were taking me off the path that I'm now on. So now I know that I have the potential to come off the path. I've gotta keep myself on it, right? I've gotta hold myself accountable. I've gotta remind myself. And that's what I want for you. When you write these things down. When you're living through a miracle and you might not know that you're about to be confronted with a miracle tomorrow, today. You don't know that yet. But it's important to take notes, journal, and really track your progress and notice what are the things that I'm doing right now? Am I making good decisions? Am I supporting myself? Am I making myself a priority? What is my relationship like with God? What is my relationship like with the people in my life? Are they supporting me? Am I supporting them? Am I making good choices? And as we notice and pay attention to all of these things and we're intentional around what we're doing, start noticing what's showing up for you. Start noticing what you're asking for. And if you're knocking on those doors and they're opening every morning, I say, God, please close the doors on that which is no longer meant for me. And please open the doors to that which is, whether it be personal relationships, business relationships, partnerships. Work, it doesn't matter. It's just something that I ask for on daily and I pay attention to and I notice. So the example of the condo is I was tracking that. I was asking for these things, I was praying about it, I was writing it down with intention. I was asking the universe to show me a way to open a door to allow this condo to be sold for the divine right buyer to come at the divine right timing. And I believe it was three offers and accepted all three. And each one of them fell apart. And this was happening over, gosh, maybe a five month period. And the market climate was changing in Miami and I was freaking out and I was panicking and instead of letting go, you know, let go and let God. I was trying to hold on with desperation to why isn't this happening? Can't let's force it? Like, can't we make it? Can't we make the sale go through? What do you mean it fell apart? And I was moving back to my old ways, back to fear, back to control. And of course, when you move towards fear and trying to control everything, things are gonna fall apart. That's not a successful plan or strategy. I know that in theory, but I was so knee deep in it that it blew up in my face. The deals, I believe it was three deals fell apart. And so I started getting really discouraged. Well, during this time I decided, you know, one of the things that I've been reading a lot about is when you start fixating on the outcome that you want, not how it's gonna happen, but the outcome that you want, that's a good strategy. Which was something new for me. I hadn't done that previously. And so one of the things that I did that I thought maybe could help me was, Heather, go find a new place that you wanna live. And when you do that, you know, fixate on that location, fixate on, you know, moving in there, drive by it, whatever. So during this time where all these deals were falling apart and I was getting very discouraged, I tried to get myself to just fixate on where I wanted to go. So I would drive by this place that I fell in love with. I had gone in and seen it, I wanted to put an offer on it so bad, but I needed to wait for my condo to close and remember, you know, I was in the middle of this. Three different deals falling apart over a few month period. So I didn't feel confident that it was going to happen. Well, wouldn't you know, at the end of the summer it was looking really good for my condo deal to go Through. And so I immediately went back to see this other location that I had fallen in love with. To me, it was perfect. It was so beautiful. It was so amazing. It was a little more money than I wanted to spend. Shocker. But I was so excited. I couldn't wait to live there. Well, I get there, and they had just sold the location to somebody else. And it was under contract. It was a done deal, right? The ship had sailed. I went into total upset phase, you know? I mean, I think I even cried. I was just so heartbroken that in my mind, this was the most perfect place in the world. And what do you mean? Somebody else got it? No, it's gotta fall apart. And I started obsessing about that, right? This is meant for me. And even though every morning I was getting up and asking, God, please close the doors on that which is not meant for me. Please open the doors on that which is meant for me. But I wasn't really living it. I was saying it. Which is a great first step, right? Cause we wanna plant the seeds. We want to make these suggestions to our mind, to our subconscious, to our everyday life of what we want. And we wanna ask for what we want. But then we also have to get real with ourselves and say, am I really living this? Right? I'm asking for it, but am I living it? If I am gonna have a strong relationship with God, I have to have faith. I have to let go of this idea that I control everything. I don't control the majority of things in the world. I can control my choices and my actions, but that's about it. And so I had to let go. And that was a struggle for me. But what I've learned, and when I read the things that I've written during this time period, right? Cause I reflect on it every morning. Cause it was so powerful and so big in my life, and I don't wanna forget it. What I realized is this. The longer I was holding onto it, driving over to that house, getting upset, crying, feeling so bad for myself, wanting to find a way to unwind the new buyer and get them out of there so I could get into my house. I was calling it that, by the way. I had to let go of that. I had to let go and let God. I had to say, wait a minute. I've been asking for God to close the doors on that which is not meant for me. Maybe this was not meant for me. Maybe I need to have faith right now to just let go. And if it is meant for me, it will show up somehow, and it will be for me. And that was the hardest part for me. And this is why I wrote it all down. It was really, really challenging for me. I've had control issues my entire life, right, That I wanna control everything and I wanna force the outcomes. What I've learned is that's wrong. And so I've learned so much of that through my relationship with my faith and through so much of the. So much through the books that I've read over the past year has really brought me to this, and now I'm finally starting to live it. I'm not perfect at it, by the way, because, you know, I'm 48 years old. We've got a lot of years under our belt of doing it one way, which didn't work. But this new way does work. And that's why I write down these examples and I read them and reread them all the time to remind myself, hey, stay on this path. This is the proof that you need. So when you have these moments, write them down, read them with intention on the daily to remind yourself of the path that you do want to stay on. And this is the proof as to why you should do it. It's that time of year again.

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I end up deciding all right, I'm going to have to let go and let God. And even though it was so hard for me to say oh my gosh, it was so awful and it reminds me of relationships, too. I have so many of these in my life where, why did my boyfriend cheat on me? And why did this happen? We were supposed to get married, and this is how it was supposed to be. And I would go through, oh, my gosh, I can't tell you, a number of times have I gone through those emotions where, no, I want to hang on and strangle the life out of everything to make it work and make it happen instead of just saying, you know what? This doesn't feel right and this isn't right for me, and I can let go and let God and have faith that this door is meant to be closed for now for me. If it's meant to open in the future, it will. And if it's not, something else better will be there and have that faith. I did not live like that before, and it's caused me so many problems in my life, problems I don't want for you. So this idea of letting go, letting God or letting the universe, however you wanna say it, and having this faith that if the door closes, it wasn't meant for you. You don't need to be smashing on the door and taking an ax out and trying to knock the door down the way that I've lived my life. But instead, you can gracefully walk away in faith, knowing that that right door will open for you whichever one is meant to. Okay, so this was all happening, and I slowly started releasing my chokehold on that place that I wanted so badly that I called my house that I was crying over, and I started opening my mind to, okay, this door has been closed because it's not meant for me, which means there is a door out there that is meant for me, and it's got to be something better. And so I called my realtor and I said, we need to start looking at other places. I want to open my mind to other possibility out there. I need to move on from this one location since it's gone emotionally, mentally, like, I gotta take some action here and get myself moving in a different direction. And wouldn't you know, we went and saw a place and I thought, you know what? This is fine. I'm gonna make an offer. And I made an offer on this location. I wasn't in love with the place, but I thought, you know what? This is fine. It's fine. Let's just get it. And so I was negotiating with the realtor, and the realtor was awful and treating me in a way that I was not happy about. And my son was watching me on tech and he said. He grabbed my hand and he said, mom, you look very upset right now and very annoyed. If this home was meant for us, it would be going through easily and with ease and grace, and it wouldn't be this upset and challenge and fighting. He said, I don't think God's hand is on this. Which means I don't think our hand should be on it. I think you should let it go. And I remember thinking to myself, he's so profound. He's so smart, and he is an old soul, and he's right. I was fighting with the realtor, you know, on text, and I decided to put the phone down to let go and let God. And I went to bed that night, and I felt at peace with what I had decided. And I thought, I'll pick this up in the morning. In the morning. I picked the phone and somebody else had got that location right. And I just decided to say, okay, then that one wasn't meant for us. Please close the doors on that which is not meant for us. So I let go and I let go, and I did not get all upset and angry, which is the way that I would have handled it in the past. I just said, I'm going to let go and another, better door will open for me. So the next day, I went to look at condos with my realtor, and we went in and saw this beautiful place. It was really expensive. So I start trying to negotiate with the guy on site. It was a gorgeous place. I had never been in the building, and it was really, really beautiful. And I start trying to negotiate with him while we're there, face to face, because I just want to get a deal done. And I loved the place. It was really beautiful. Bigger than what I needed, but I loved it. And the guy gave me this cold stare and said, you're out of your mind if you think we're going to negotiate at all. This will be done full asking price or not done at all. And I remember thinking, what? Not negotiate? You're crazy. And I looked him right back in the eyes. I said, well, then, I'm not your buyer. And I looked at my realtor and I said, let's go. And we left. And I was so clear, and I just knew. And it was so freeing in this idea of close the door on that which is not meant for me. The way the man addressed me and the fact that he wouldn't even entertain any type of negotiation, just said to me, like, this is not my deal at all. And so it just became clear, okay, this door is closing, too. Something better is out there. And so my realtor said, okay, we have one place left to see today, Heather. And then I'm gonna have to go back to the drawing board. And I said, okay, it's fine. I know that the right door is out there somewhere. We just haven't found it yet. And I'm going to move forward in this faith that I don't control everything. But there is something better out there when I let go and let it unfold. And so we arrived at the final place, and I had never been at the building before. And we got up to the unit, and I knew instantaneously that this was my home. It was so crazy, and it was so gorgeous, and it was so much less money than the place we had just seen that I was making an offer on. And it all came together with such ease and grace. And the other realtor was so nice and kind, and I told her immediately I wanted it, and she told me immediately she wanted me to get it. And it all worked. And it was seamless. And there was no fighting and there was no drama. And I would have never found this place where I live now if I hadn't let go of that first place. Remember the one that I told you I was so obsessed with? I used to drive over and look at it all the time. Where I live now is so much of a better fit for me. Location wise, size wise, price wise, everything. And I like it better. But I would have never found where I am today if I hadn't let go of this idea of something else being meant for me. So it's this big life lesson for me. And there's so many examples of this in my life. I can't even. I look back so many times, did I try to strangle something to death to try to make it work? Because I thought it had to be this way. That as you learn, there is proof. And for me, that one story I just shared with you is just an example that there is proof. When you let go of mediocre, you open the door to grab. Great, right? You gotta be willing to let go of that which is not meant for you in order to grab that which is. And the best is yet to come. That next thing that next door holds so much more, but you have to be willing to let go of the other one. And for so long in my life, I was holding on and strangling things to try to control them even when they weren't the best. Because out of fear, out of the fear of the unknown out of fear of the future, out of fear of what's behind door number three, when now I'm living in door three. And it's the best. I couldn't be happier. I'm so grateful every day. And I love reading through that story every morning. For me, for sure. That's going in my next book, by the way. But I love reading through that story, which is all about letting go of that which is not meant for us so that we can open the doors to that which is. And that which is ahead of us is so much better than you can ever imagine. But you won't find it until you let go. So I don't know what it is that you're holding onto in your life. If it's a person, if it's people, if it's a profession, a company, a bad habit. If it's, you know, the home you wanted to buy and you can't get over, you're not getting it. AKA that was me a couple of months ago. But I'm here today with proof to tell you when you let go of the doors that are closing on you and they're closing for a reason, you actually open up the door to something so much better. And that was the same way with my job when I got fired. That was the same way with relationships in my life that I was so afraid to let go of. Cause what if there wasn't something better on the other side, but instead moving forward, knowing what you're worth, knowing your value, and knowing when something isn't the right fit for you. Like my son said when that realtor was treating me in a rude manner, that's not our deal. These aren't our people. We don't need to be treated that way. That right door will open, and when it does, it will happen with ease and grace. Because that's what we're asking for, that's what we're praying for, and that's the energy we're putting out there. So I hope that that story helps you in some way to let go of something that you're trying to hold onto that isn't meant for you. And if you're having those moments, be sure to ask, please close the doors on that which is not meant for me, and please open the doors to that which is the best is yet to come. And that is for sure. I am positive about that. Okay, so we're getting close to the holiday right now. If you haven't Ordered Confidence Creator or Overcome youe Villains for someone that you Love. Oh my gosh. Get it now. Both are on sale right now. It's crazy. Overcome youm Villains. The hardcover is like $16, which is 40% off. It's incredible. And you can still get it in time for the holiday. Please set somebody up for success for 2023. Give them the information they need so they can then in turn apply it and start to transform in ways that you know, are possible. I also just launched my new product, Sole Sayings. Oh my gosh. Go to my link in my Instagram account. You will see it. I have these incredible. I'm so proud of these. I partnered with a friend of mine who has an incredible shoe company and we put together sayings. Basically, everybody needs to be able to pick themselves up once in a while. Well, on the days when you're struggling to. We did the hard work for you. We put notes on the bottom of your shoes. You can order these online. They're only $10. They're such a great stocking stuff or such a great gift to uplift somebody else. We all need encouragement once in a while and I hope that I get to be there to encourage you through this show, through my books, through the podcast, through my soul sayings. Now I'm super excited to hear what you think. As always, drop me a dm. Please leave a review. If you like the show, share it with someone that you love. Until next week. Keep creating your confidence. You know I will be. I decided to change that dynamic. I couldn't be more excited for what you're going to hear. Start learning and growing. Inevitably something will happen. No one succeeds alone. You don't stop and look around once in a while. You could miss it. Come on this journey with me.