Someone describes living chaotically: hungover mornings, a lost wallet, nearly losing their car, missed shifts. They realized they stayed in the past because the predictable future it created felt comforting, even when that future was bad.
When you say, hey, I ended up being what I didn't want to be, what was that? What was happening in your life that you realized this is horrible?
Yeah, well, I mean, I think I woke up and I was pretty hungover, so. So that wasn't the best start to my day. I couldn't find my wallet. When I did find my wallet, it was empty. I was on the verge of having my car repoed. My job wasn't consistent. I'd missed a lot of work. It's just what I had done is basically adopted this lifestyle of chaos. And so what I was realizing is that although I sat said that I hated it, it's what I was used to. And so in that space, I felt comfort. And that sounds really odd to say, but I felt comfort because if we live in the past, the future is predictable. Right? And so because I was just living in my past, I could predict what was going to happen. And that was comforting to me, to know what to anticipate, even if it was bad.
