Life is all about fitting in

Life is all about fitting in, right? You want to fit in with everyone else around you, drive the same cars, talk the same way, wear the same clothes, have similar relationships, travel to similar destinations. I think it's definitely the way forward if we want to have a life of comparison, life of disappointment, a life of misery. And guys, how often do we set ourselves up to follow everyone else's footsteps, to do what we were told we should do in life, and that is go to school, sit down, listen for eight hours, put your hand up when you want to speak, go to university, get a degree, go into a job that you kind of like, but it pays the bills, live in a neighborhood that's a cookie cutter neighbourhood and do as your neighbors do and trim your grass the same way they do. Travel to your island resort once a year, take your two weeks holidays, save up until you're 65 and Bob's your uncle, you can retire and spend the money right? Well, life is yours to be lived. And fitting in with everyone else, that's damn hard. You know, I was speaking with a mum the other day and she was saying, you know what, I just don't fit in with all the other mums. I feel like, you know, Buddy the Elf, you know, I just feel like the one that's just not fitting in. I don't think like them, I don't talk like them, I don't have the MLM schemes going that they do, the pyramid schemes. I'm just different. I think, great, high five, embrace that. And I know that's hard to say, but sometimes, you know, when you think about life, fitting in is easier because you don't stand out, people don't talk about you, they talk to you and you fit in and you don't challenge them. Well, guys, life, life is a one shot deal. And it's so, so important to live life on your terms. Your terms are nobody else's. Here's a few examples that some of you might be able to relate to in terms of trying to fit in. It could be at your local church. If you go to church, you might want to try and fit in and wear similar clothes, talk in a similar way, force the smile if you need to do that in a certain way. So say certain things to keep everyone happy and think that you're, you know, a certain fit. Now is that fun? Is that authentic? I don't think so. Now I've caught myself at times being in positions and situations and places of work where I'm like, I better try and fit in. I Better walk their walk if people are going to like me, if people are going to accept me, right? But I started to realize that if I can love, acceptance and like myself, then I don't need to fit in. I can just be myself. Instead of wearing the shirt and suit and tie, I can wear a T shirt or a polo shirt, or I can wear shorts and flip flops, right? It's about knowing who you are. Let's take another example. Maybe at school. Remember at school trying to fit in, trying to make sure the bullies didn't target you so you would kind of just try and wear similar clothes or walk a similar way or join a team that would give you some protection and acceptance. School was damn hard to navigate. We were constantly trying to navigate, should I be who I am or should I survive? And often survival is so much more powerful than being ourselves because it's a human instinct to survive. And when we go back thousands of years to survive, we had to be part of a tribe and we had to fit in and we had to be accepted and we had to know how to talk and the behaviors that were acceptable or not. Nowadays, it's a bit different. We're not in a constant state of survival, yet we act like we are. And often that means that we will say certain things and embellish stories and, you know, get a car that we can't afford because we want to look like we fit into the community that we're living in. Now, guys, that's just setting yourself up for lots of misery, lots of debt probably as well. And that's really just not aligning with who you truly are. And, you know, let's take the car example, because many of you guys probably drive a car now when you were maybe trying to fit in to a community that was maybe, you know, a few hundred thousand dollars earning more, you know, up the pay scale than you. Maybe you wanted to get the nicer car. You wanted to get the Volkswagen Golf or you wanted to get the BMW, whatever it might be to fit in. But then let's say all of a sudden you start to earn more and you're providing more value, and you're associating in circles that were similar to the ones you were brought up in. Maybe they don't have the money. Well, maybe you're going to be thinking, I'd love to buy the Ferrari or the Tesla because it's cool and I love cars and it feels good. But maybe you're thinking, I might not fit in if I do that, so I better A different car where I can just not look like I'm out earning or outdoing or trying to show off. And so I'll get a different car that I don't really like, but I'll fit it. Both ways are equally disastrous, right? You want to live by your terms. Nobody else's. Not your teachers, not your ministers, not your leaders, your terms, right? That's what life's about. There's only one. You go out and be the best version of you. Here's three tips to live life on your terms and to not worry about fitting in. Number one is identify your core values. What are your values? Have you ever done that work before? You know, who am I? What do I stand for? Right? You've got to stand for something, otherwise you stand for nothing. So take your time and identify your core values. It could be two or three that just are really strong, you know, for me, I'll share mine. Mine are simple. It's love, grow, serve. I want to love more fully each day. I want to grow exponentially, and I want to serve unconditionally. Those are three simple core values. And what I try to do each day before I go to sleep is ask myself, did I love a bit more fully? Did I serve more? Did I grow more? And some days I get green lights for all three. Some days I get red lights for all three. So it's about thinking, okay, how do I just keep myself accountable to two or three core values that keep me on the straight and narrow? So the choice is yours. Just sit for two minutes, maybe 20 minutes, maybe a couple of hours, maybe a couple of weeks. You'll take, but identify what your key values are. Could be honor, it could be loyalty, it could be growth, it could be service, it could be wealth, it could be knowledge, it could be connection, love. Whatever it might be, you'll know what it is. Number two, draft your own legacy statement. What's a legacy statement, you might ask, simply a paragraph or maybe two that defines who you are. And maybe it's the kind of statement that you'll maybe think that a child might read after you're dead and gone about you. Like, mom was a loving human who had the most beautiful smile and served those around her with beauty, with unconditional love and service. She was so committed to her hobby, her family, her own growth. Think about what that legacy statement might be like. And essentially it's, you know, getting towards the end of your life. Looking back, what would you be proud of? What would make you proud? And it doesn't need to be all about money and status and achievement. Far from it. Some of you might choose that, and that's cool. But you know, part of becoming a billionaire, I would say, is about being philanthropic. It's about being fulfilled, about having great love and connection. I've been very fortunate to sit down with some billionaires and chat to them about life and what life means. And they're all about connection. They're all about impact. It's not about the money. The money has simply helped them to create a greater impact. So I want you to think about what your legacy statement is all about and write it down. And just before I tell you the third tip to really living life on your terms, please smash the subscribe button below and also check in the description because I've got a free gift for you, a free book. Please go and grab that book now. The third tip to really live in life on your terms and to ditch the whole trying to fit in thing, is discover your true north. Discover where you're headed. And on that train journey, north, when you're heading towards what you know is right, when there's any passengers trying to slow you down and they're on the wrong train and they're criticizing and they're gossiping and they're holding you back and they're challenging your dreams, gently let them off at the next station as your train journey heads north to your true north, that North Star. You've got to let some people go. If they're not lifting you up. People are either doing one of two things. They're lifting you up or they're dragging you down. Doesn't mean you need to ditch everybody in your life, but it maybe means you need to spend a little bit less time with certain individuals and spend more time with people who lift you up. So identify what your true North Star is and then head there and know that along the way, you're going to have to shed some weight. I wish you nothing but the best. Live your life on purpose and get out there, Love more fully, grow exponentially, and serve unconditionally. Hey guys, if you enjoyed the content today, please smash that subscribe button below. And if you want to become part of my community, I've got an amazing free Facebook group. Please come and join us. The link is in the description below. And also, if you've got any questions about today's session, I'd love to know. Just comment below and I'll be sure to get back to you guys. Have the most amazing day.