James Laughlin argues that success and struggle are inseparable. He shares a personal story about fertility struggles and miscarriage before his son Finn was born, which changed how he sees hardship and the privilege of having children.
Success and struggle go hand in hand. Highs and lows are part of life. And when you think about it, often our highs are followed by lows and our lows are followed by highs. And it's a cycle. It's kind of like the weather right behind me. You can see it's dark and stormy, but I know the sun's going to come after that. And followed by day is night and vice versa. So I think it's really important to know that success and struggle really do go hand in hand. It's human behavior to avoid pain and seek pleasure, right? That's what we do. Every decision we make is to do one of those two things. To move away from pain or to move towards pleasure. It doesn't matter whether it's eating a food, let's say pineapple, you're moving towards pleasure, right? That's why you choose to do it. Let's say the gin. You're not going to the gym. Why? Well, you're avoiding the pain of going to the gym and you're getting the pleasure of sitting on the couch and watching Netflix, right? Every decision you make, you're either doing one of those two things. Moving away from the pain or moving towards the pleasure, moving away from the struggle, moving towards the success, right? But to experience success fully, we must endure the struggle, right? You must embrace that struggle and endure it, get through it, learn from it, and come out the other end. Right? Can you remember the last time you did something epic, some massive achievement in your life? Think about the months or the years leading up to that moment. Was there some sacrifice? Were there some struggles? Or did that point magically come along? After many, many, many successes, you had another success. I imagine you'll be able to reflect back and go, ah, wow. I achieved that gold medal because I put in all the hard yards and I broke a muscle and I did this. And X, Y and Z I had to struggle through to get to the success.
My own story is something I haven't shared a lot of, but one of my greatest struggles was to become a dad. And it's one of my greatest privileges to be a dad. But I remember before I've got Finn. So Finn's four years old. He. He's an amazing little boy. He's full of life. But before that, there were some struggles. And Finn's mom and I, we had a bumpy road in getting there. And in fact, we. We lost a baby to miscarriage.
Before we had Finn. And for me, that really put a lot, a lot of stuff in perspective. Put life in perspective.
Made me think about what's really important. Made me also question, why is life so damn hard? Why is it so damn cruel at times? And it is. And it has taken me time to come to terms with that and realize that life isn't easy. Life is a struggle. But we've got to embrace that struggle. We've got to know that after the struggles come success. And after I picked myself up and I sat in that despair, the muddy waters of despair, for some time. But when I eventually picked myself up, I made a decision that I needed to move forward. I made a decision that intentionally, I had to take the next step to continue living life and to continue being there for the people I loved. And so when the day came that Finn joined the world, I looked in his little beautiful brown eyes and I told him I loved him. And it was one of the most emotional experiences of my life. And I'll never forget that moment. And that changed everything, you know, that pivotal moment. Every time I look at his eyes, every day, I'm grateful. It reminds me of the struggle. When I look in his eyes, I remember the struggle. But I also am incredibly grateful for the joy that he has brought. And I look at that as one of my greatest successes. Becoming a father. Becoming a father who is given the opportunity to help guide this little being. What an opportunity. And if there's one tiny piece of advice I can give you that is to be relentless in a pursuit of joy. Don't give up. Keep getting back up. Keep fighting. While whether you're pushing through something emotional or a relationship, whether you're pushing through a career transition or someone passing in your family, keep fighting relentlessly in the pursuit of joy. It's worth it. Life is worth it. And when your next struggles appear, get excited. Why? Because they are the precursor to the next big success that comes up. Never forget that when stuff gets tough, which it will, just remember that that is a sign that something good is around the corner. Push through, fight. Get the resources you need, seek the mentorship, the coaching, the advice that you need, or just hunker down and get to work, whatever it might be. And know that your struggles are letting you know that just around the corner are some major successes. And whatever you do, be hopeful, be grateful, and never, ever give up on yourself. Hey, guys, if you enjoyed the content today, please smash that subscribe button below. And if you want to become part of my community, I've got an amazing free Facebook group. Please come and join us. The link is in the description below. And Also, if you've got any questions about today's session, I'd love to know. Just comment below and I'll be sure to get back to you guys. Have the most amazing day.
