Coach Jay argues that affirmations don't work because they skip the real work: changing your identity first. He uses a 12-dimension model to diagnose what's actually broken, then walks through his three-layer process of rewiring your neurology before you change behavior or get results.
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It's working, it's working. Okay, that's good. Drag that down. All right, I think I'm live. I don't even know. We gonna see, we gonna see, we gonna see, we gonna see. All right, let me get to y'all. I'm coming back over here now. All right, what's good, what's good, what's good? How y'all doing, man? Welcome to the live, welcome to the live, welcome to the live. What's up, Jay? We're gonna be talking about what we always talk about: the fact that you could be doing have anything you desire, the fact that nothing can stop you except for you. Your only limit in life is your own imagination. If you could think it, you could do it. If you can't think it, why would you be able to do it? Great day. Good morning. How y'all doing? It's live. Yes, live on here. We pushing out. We all over the place this morning. We on TT. We on YT. We on IG. I'm pushing everywhere. I'm pushing out everywhere. Might as well. I'm already sitting here. I'm already on here. Yeah, you good at sensing me for sure. Get y'all daily heartbeats. Yeah, get y'all daily heartbeats. Why not? You know, why not? Why not? Why not? There's only 4 ways to grow business. Way number 1 is lead generation. Why not take a morning live that I already do every morning? It's already dope. It's already fire. It's what, another 4 clicks of the mouse? Why not? Would be insane not to. Would be insane not to. I'm gonna have to, uh, plug up the other monitor because this is a lot to handle on one screen. This is a lot to handle on one screen. Yeah, throw us on IG. We're gonna start— IG is— I'm gonna be honest, it's my least favorite platform, but I could definitely see the value in it with the way they let you do calls to action and different things on there. They, they very like link friendly, so I'm gonna have to, uh, I'm gonna have to adapt and start going over there and hanging out. I'm gonna have to. What y'all got going this morning though? How y'all feeling, man? Y'all ready for the weekend? I thought I was Live with it. I don't believe I am. Thought I was, but it don't look like I am. They keep, uh, changing the screen key on me. But I don't know. We'll we'll figure that part out tomorrow or another time. Ain't gonna let that slow everything else down. You already follow me there? You follow the I coach bosses one. So hey, if it's your first time in here, I'm Coach Jay. I'm a clinically trained hypnotherapist. I'm the founder of Identity 2.0. We work with athletes, entrepreneurs, executives, founders, day traders, MMA fighters, actors, people who sell things but they want to sell more stuff, people who are maybe afraid of public speaking, they want to present more confident— confidently. We hypnotize the hell out of them and we push them back into the world. But that's what we do, man. People come over here when they've tried the affirmations, they've tried the vision boards, the incantations, the affirmations, the medication, the therapy, they've done all of that stuff, but their confidence still not where they want wanted to be. They still not moving through life that they wanted to be the way that they want to be. And, um, they're struggling to what most people call manifest. I don't call it manifest, I call it living on purpose. But they're struggling to live on purpose. We get them out of their own way. So if you're a procrastinator, a person who's like feeling like an imposter, second-guessing yourself, you're afraid of public speaking, any of that stuff, man, hang out in here. Come pick my brain. Come in here and learn. Take you some notes, and let's remind you who you are. Hey, for sure, daily. Thanks for pulling up. How y'all doing this morning? Guys, let's all let's go crazy on these taps. Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Share, share, share, share, share. Let's blow it up. Let's blow it up. Let's run it up to ten thousand taps real quick. What's going on, Queen Diva? Thanks for getting your daily heart meat. Thanks for getting your daily heart meat. Let me pull up these other parts of the chat so we can keep everybody in the loop, so that we can keep everybody in the loop. Let's see. All right, put that over there. There we go. Happy Friday, and I'm great. Hope you also— I'm doing amazing. I'm doing amazing. I need to look at this schedule, see what I'm, um, stepping into today. Let's see what we stepping into today. I think it's just typical though. Let's see. Yep, yep. Okay, so I'm all recurring clients today. No new people coming in. We good. What's going on, Von? How you doing? Welcome to the live. Welcome to the live. Welcome, welcome, welcome, guys. You could be doing to have anything you desire. Everything that we talk about, that's the foundation of it. You could be, do, and have anything you desire. There's nothing you can't be. There's nothing you can't do. There's nothing you can't have. But you gotta respect the order. I didn't say you could do anything, you could be anything, you can have anything. I didn't say you could have anything, you could be anything, you could do anything. I said you can be anything, you can do anything, you can have anything. And that order is on purpose. That order is not an accident. Before you could do it, you gotta be it. Okay, if you're trying to do entrepreneurship while being an employee, I feel sorry for you. If you're trying to do rich things while being poor, I feel sorry for you. You gotta be it first. Now what you gotta understand about being is that being happens inside of you. When we talk about those 5 C's, when we talk about clarity, calibration, confidence, competence, consistency, those first 3 C's are what I call the being. Those are what I call the being. Clarity happens inside of you. Calibration happens inside of you. Confidence happens inside of you. And when you try to make confidence happen outside of you, you barking up the wrong tree. And I'm not surprised that it doesn't work. Clarity is about figuring out what you want. What do I really want? Not what other people are trying to sell me. Not what society says that I should want. Uh, let's chat. ChatGPT. Not, not which, not what are they trying to sell me, not what are they saying I should be doing. What do I, what do I want? And you gotta understand, don't confuse what you want with the things that you have to do to get it. Don't confuse what you want with the things that you have to do to get it. Okay, Jay, I want to stop eating carbs. No, you don't. That's something that you're willing to do to get what you want, but that's not what you want. Jay, I want to go back to school. No, you don't. You will go back to school to get what you want, but that's not what you want. So when I talk about clarity, I'm talking about what do you actually want? Not, not what are you— not what are the things you're willing to do. Now, what are the things you're willing to sacrifice? What do you want? Okay, so you get clear about that. After you get clear about that, then you start to calibrate to that. Coach Jay, what is calibration? What you got to understand about calibration is that you're already doing it. You're already calibrating. When something happened at work at 1 PM and you at home at 7 PM thinking about it, replaying it in your mind, pissed off, on the phone talking about it, in your journal writing about it, you're calibrating, friend. You're calibrating, friend. And deeper than financial stability, Queen. So Queen D, if you got a conscious mind and you got a subconscious mind, y'all ever see that picture of like an iceberg and on the top of the iceberg It looks huge. But then if you zoom out, you can see what's under that iceberg. You realize that 80% of the iceberg is underwater. Put a 1 in the chat if you know what I'm talking about. If you've ever just— if you've ever seen an iceberg, put a 1 in the chat. We got to get us a graphic of an iceberg. Yeah. So when you look at that iceberg on top of the water, you're looking at the conscious mind. That's the logic, the reasoning, the analysis, the willpower, the decision-making. Okay, that's the part of you saying I want financial freedom, what's on top of the water. But that bottom 90%, that the, the bulk of the iceberg, it doesn't care about financial freedom. It cares about the feelings and emotions related to financial stability. So we don't even start out with going to get the financial stability because the financial stability is out here. I mean, it's out there. Y'all tracking with me? The financial stability is out there. We can't start out there. Everything is built from the inside out. So if you try to start with financial stability, you're going to set yourself up for failure. You're going to set yourself up for failure. So what you got to ask yourself is, how would I feel? How would I emote if I already had financial stability? And that's what you start calibrating to. You start calibrating to the feelings that you would have if you already had financial stability. Oh, Jay, if I woke up tomorrow and I was already financially stable, How would I feel? I feel comfortable. I feel at ease. I feel secure. I feel successful. I feel like I like I figured it out. I feel like I understand how money works. Okay, I'm not going to hypnotize you to be financially financially stable. I'm gonna hypnotize you to feel that way. If you understand this, it will really set you free. I'm not going to hypnotize you to be financially stable. I'm going to hypnotize you to feel how. you would feel if you were already financially stable. Because guess what? When we get you feeling that way, you're gonna accidentally start reading books that people who feel that way read. When we get you feeling that way, you're gonna accidentally start listening to podcasts that people who feel that way listen to. When we get you feeling that way, you're gonna accidentally start handling your money like the people who feel that way handle their money. You're going to start investing like the people who feel that way invest. You're going to ask questions when you feel that way that you would never ask when you feel that way. You're going to come out of fight or flight. You're going to get back in your parasympathetic nervous system. You're going to start using your mammalian brain, that frontal lobe that God gifted us humans with, and you're going to start accidentally moving through life different. Do y'all— do y'all see what just happened here? We never start with the behavior. We never start with the behavior. It blows people's mind when I tell them I don't care about behavior. They say, Coach, I'm hiring you to change my behavior. I don't care about your behavior. Behavior does not come out of thin air. Your identity gives birth to your behavior. Your identity gives birth to your behavior. So I look at identity like a recipe. The dope thing about a recipe— nope, you don't got to repair the nervous system. You got to fix the focus. And as you fix the focus, the nervous system is going to repair itself. It's not your job to repair the nervous system. The nervous system is going to repair itself. Your job is to quit knocking it out of regulation. Anytime you try to use the conscious mind to do subconscious activity, you run into what we call the law of reverse action. And the law of reverse action states the harder you try, the harder you fail. It's kind of like trying to fall asleep. The harder you try to fall asleep, the more awake you become. You don't make yourself go to sleep. You surrender to sleep. You let go to sleep. You let the conscious mind wander off so that the subconscious mind can take over. You don't make it happen. You surrender to it. So now you don't repair the nervous system. You ask yourself, what would I be focusing on? What would I be thinking about? What would I be expecting if I was already financially secure? As you start to use your mind like a financially secure person, you're gonna accidentally— you're gonna, you're gonna slip and fall out of fight or flight. You're gonna slip and fall into a healthy nervous system. Does that make sense? Now, if you're trying to repair your nervous system, you can't because it's not your job. God put that system on autopilot. Don't— I don't, I don't want you to surrender to the result nearly as much as I want you to surrender to the feelings and the emotions. You got to learn how to let the feelings and emotions Emotions do the work. When I'm angry, I don't need willpower to stomp my feet. I'm gonna accidentally stomp my feet because I'm angry. When I'm angry, I don't need willpower to raise my voice. I'm gonna accidentally raise my voice because I'm angry. I'm gonna accidentally slam the door. You see how my behavior follows my feelings? I don't gotta make myself slam the door. Hell, I need willpower to not slam the door when I'm angry. So if I'm being financially secure, if I'm being comfortable, If I'm being at ease, if I'm being relaxed, if I'm being the type of person to know these money things always work out for me, I'm gonna accidentally start reading books that align with that. I'm gonna accidentally start listening to podcasts that align with that. I'm gonna accidentally— my TikTok algorithm is gonna start to reflect that. My YouTube algorithm is going to start to reflect that. The way that I handle my money is going to start to reflect that. So the next thing you know, I'm on ChatGPT, and I'm not using ChatGPT to make characters and all this other stuff. No, I'm using ChatGPT. So if I wanted to start investing, where should I start? Okay, what if I only have $100 a month that I could start with? Okay, so okay, now this $100 a month that I would have spent on coffee and BS, now I'm accidentally— because of what I'm focusing on. Because of what I'm paying attention to, because of what I'm believing, because of what I'm expecting, because of the conversations that's happening inside of my head, I'mma change my behavior on accident. Most people, when they look around, it's an accident. The person they lay beside every night, accident. It was the best looking person that was attracted to you at the time. You went for the job you got right now. You filled out 20 applications. They called back first at work, accident. The car you drive, that's the one they would approve you for, accident. Accident, accident. Not everybody, but most people, as we look through life, accident. The house they live in, yo, this is the one I got approved for. I'm an accident, accident, accident, accident. You are a creator, and what you got to understand is because you are a creator, you creating whether you do it on purpose or not. But when you start creating on purpose, you realize you got way more say-so than you thought you had. But that say-so starts from the inside. Like I always explain to my clients, that the work that we do happens in layers. It happens in 3 layers. Y'all put 3 in the chat. I ain't gonna lie, Y'all a little lazy for a Friday. Y'all a little lazy for a Friday. I'm so glad I'm not relying on y'all for my energy because it'll be dead in here. Y'all gotta catch up, muster. Let's go tap the down screen. Bring some energy here. Share the live. All those little buttons that TikTok put down there. All those little buttons that YouTube put down there. Use them. Y'all awake? Hello? All right. So it happens in layers. Okay. So I tell my clients first it's gonna work inside of you. Coach Jay, will you hypnotize me? Yeah, I'm gonna hypnotize the hell out of you. But let me, let me explain how these changes are going to unfold. First, it's going to work inside of you, okay? Then it's going to work on you, okay? Then it's going to work for you. It works in layers: in me, on me, for me. Y'all say that in the chat. In me, on me, for me. It's gonna change your whole manifestation process. This gonna change your whole manifestation process. First, it's gonna work in you. Coach, what does it look like when it's working in me? That's when it's changing the neural structure of your brain. That's when it's changing your nervous system. That's when it's changing the chemicals that your endocrine system releases. That's when it's changing how your reticular activations work. Your reticular activation system works. So first, it's gonna work on you. It's gonna change what's going on inside of your neurology. And guess what? You're not gonna see it changing what's going on inside of your neurology. Okay, so it's going to change your neurology, and when it's done changing your neurology, then it's going to start working on you. So first it's going to work in you, it's going to start working on you. Coach, what does it look like when it's working on me? It's going to change your facial expression, it's going to change your body language, it's going to change the tone of your voice, it's going to change the way you respond when people ask you what do you do, it's going to change what you focus on, it's going to change what you pay attention to. That's what it looks like when it's working on you. So in me, on me, then it's going to work for you. Coach, what does it look like when it's working for me? Oh, this is the part you've been waiting on. That's when the bank account starts to respond. That's when the relationships start to shift. That's when the opportunities start to show up. Does that make sense? But what happened a lot of the times, and by a lot of the times I mean most of the time, is something will be working in a person, they looking at the bank account and saying it's not working. Oh, it's working, but it got to work in you and on you before it starts to work for you. And you skipping in me and on me and jumping right to for me, and you saying it's not working. No, we gotta change your mind before it change your bank account. They gotta change what your endocrine system is doing before it changes your bank account. They gotta change what you expect before it change your bank account. They gotta change the way that you talk to you before it change the way that other people talk to you. It gotta change the way that you feel about you before it change the way that other people feel about you. Coach J, nobody respects me. I wouldn't respect— look how you walk in the room. You looking at the floor. Look at that handshake. I can tell that you talking down to yourself. And a lot of times we be trying to get people to believe in things that we don't even believe in yet. We be trying to get people to support a business that we one foot out and one foot in on. We expect somebody to love us unconditionally and we got conditions in our mind that we put. We don't even love us unconditionally. Like no, inside out, inside out, inside out. You gotta understand it. Out there is a mirror. Always has been, always will be. It is a mirror. It is a reflection. And you gotta stop wiping in reflection and thinking that you wiping your face. Let me show you what that looks like. Imagine if one of y'all say, "Hey Coach Jay, you got something on your face," and instead of wiping my face, I start wiping my camera. I'm gonna say, "What's wrong with this man? He was he was going in a second ago. We thought Coach was smart." Why? Hold on, y'all. I gotta get this. Hold on, y'all. Let me go get a spray bottle. That that's not my face. That's a reflection of my face. The bank account is not your worth. It's a reflection of your worth. The relationship is not your value. It's your value being reflected back to you. You gotta start treating reality like the mirror that it is. Gotta understand that nothing in reality is sitting still. We live in an ocean of motion. Everything is moving. You gotta stop calibrating to this thing that refuses to sit still. Nothing sits still. This ink pen looks like it's sitting still. I promise you it's not. This hat on my head looks like it's sitting still. I promise you it's not. We live in an ocean of motion. Even like non-tangible things— your, your marriage, your money, your health, your fitness. Right now, your marriage is get— it's getting weaker or it's getting stronger. It doesn't sit still. Right now you making money or losing money. It doesn't sit still right now. You, you getting closer to living or closer to dying. It doesn't sit still. Nothing is at rest. And when you calibrate to this thing that refuses to rest, you can't rest. Put a 1 in the chat if this makes sense. When you're calibrating to this thing that refuses to rest, you can't rest. This is a conversation that I have with people when they thinking about getting entrepreneurship. Let me tell you something about entrepreneurship. It's a pendulum swing. I've been doing this entrepreneurship stuff over a decade, man. I've had a month where I made $30,000 followed by a month where I made $2,000, and I was doing the same exact thing. It's a pendulum. But if my worth is connected to what's coming in, and I mean I'm on top of the world on that $30,000 month, but then that $2,000 month I'm thinking about ending it all. My worth is not in my bank account. My bank account reflects my worth. And as I remember that over, over a stretch of time, the bank account always balances out to my worth. You gotta understand, the reality is a pendulum, and when it swings left, you don't go with it. You remain neutral and wait for the pendulum to swing back. What's going on, Debbie? What's going on, D-Ski? How y'all doing? What's up, Kai? How y'all doing, man? Welcome to the live. If it's your first time in here, I'm Coach Jay. I'm a clinically trained hypnotherapist. I'm the founder of Identity 2.0, and we coach bosses, man. Athletes, entrepreneurs, executives, founders, day traders, MMA fighters. You name it. Those are our people. My clients are people who've tried the affirmations. They've made the vision boards, did the incantations, the affirmations. They've read Joe Dispenza, Neville Goddard, Bob Proctor, Esther. They've read the books, but it's still something not clicking. So what do they do? They do the affirmations louder. They do the affirmations harder until they get over here. I say, shut up. Stop doing all those damn affirmations. And if you new here, you're gonna learn. Affirmations piss me off. They really piss me off. I ain't gonna say they piss me off. Most people misuse affirmations. Most people misuse affirmations, and it's not their fault. They were taught to misuse affirmations. The thing about affirmations is they sold y'all the receipt and told y'all it was the purchase. The receipt is not the purchase. It's proof of the purchase, but it's not the purchase. It's not the exchange of the value. I look at affirmations like a speedometer. Most people treat affirmations like the gas pedal. I look at affirmations like a speedometer. Coach, what do you mean? What do you mean? So if I'm in my car and I want to go 60, I'm not going to stare at the speedometer and say, 60, 60, 60. I want to go 60. No, I'm going to press the gas. As I press the gas, my car is going to start to accelerate. And if I keep pressing the gas, eventually that speedometer is going to reflect 60. Back to me. That's how I look at affirmations. I always tell my clients, I don't want you saying affirmations on purpose. I'm way more interested in affirmations you say on accident. I don't care about what you say on purpose. I care about what do you say when an opportunity presents itself? Do you say, man, they ain't gonna hire me, that ain't gonna work for me? Or do you say, hell yeah, man, I'm just as qualified as anybody else, let's do it? What, what do you say when things don't work out for you? What do you say on accident when things don't work out for you? Those are the affirmations I pay attention to. I never pay attention to the affirmations that you say on purpose. You know why? Nobody affirms anything they already believe in. People only affirm things that they don't believe in. Nobody affirms things that they believe in. They only affirm things that they don't believe in. You've never put a cup of water in the freezer and said, I'm so thankful and grateful that this water is frozen. I'm so thankful and grateful that this water is frozen. Now that the water is frozen, I'm living on my— No, you don't do that. You put the water in the freezer and you walk off. Why? Because you trust the freezer. You trust the environment that you put the water in to do its job. You would never put a pot of water on the stove and say, "I'm so thankful and grateful that the water is boiling." Now that the water is boil, hold on. Let me put some steam on my vision board. Hold on. Let me get my journal. Now that the water is frozen and I'm—you've never done that. If you saw somebody doing it, you would try to have them committed. Forget the affirmation. What is the identity? I look at identity like a recipe. If you put the recipe in the environment, the recipe doesn't have the choice but to produce what the recipe should produce. If I put confidence and consistency and a good message and energy on TikTok Live consistently, that number ain't got no choice but to grow. I don't gotta hope it grow. I don't gotta do no affirmations for it to grow. I don't gotta pray that it grow. I don't gotta stare at crystals for it to grow. I don't gotta wait on the moon to do a certain thing for it to grow. If I put the ingredients in the right environment, they gonna grow. I could walk off I don't gotta say it 8 billion times a day. Only question I need to ask myself is, did I put the water in the freezer? The answer is yes, I can go do something else. Did I put the water in the freezer? Yes. Okay. No, let me go put it in there. Think about it. When a woman is pregnant with the baby, she don't— you've never seen a pregnant woman walking around with a checklist. Okay, I gotta go get the lungs, I gotta go get the kidneys, I gotta go get the heart. Lord, this baby due in 7 months. I don't got none of the stuff. No, she don't gotta build the baby. She has to give the baby an environment to grow in. And if she just lets the baby borrow the environment, the baby will build itself. She don't gotta do no affirmations. I'm so thankful and grateful that the baby is growing. I'm so thankful and grateful that I'm pregnant. I'm so thankful and grateful that I'm— you know how many people that made it to 5, 6, 7 months without even knowing they pregnant? They don't, they don't gotta build the baby. They just have to give the baby an environment to grow in. You don't gotta build the business. You just gotta stop aborting it. You don't gotta build the relationship. You just gotta stop aborting the relationship. You just gotta put the ingredients in the environment. Coach, what's the ingredient? Let me pull out my recipe. Let me pull out my recipe. So I got 2 recipes that I'm always thinking about. I don't care what I'm doing. I don't care if I'm helping somebody quit smoking. I don't care if I'm helping somebody quit biting their nails. I don't care if I'm helping somebody to develop unshakable confidence. I got 2 recipes that are always front and center, and that's the 12 dimensions of identity and the 5 C's. Those two recipes are always in my mind. So we're gonna start with the twelve dimensions. Okay, so I'm never looking at behavior. I'm never looking at behavior. I'm always looking at these twelve things. So let's say somebody was coming to me because they wanted to manifest financial freedom. They wanted to manifest financial freedom. First thing I'm gonna do is have them take an identity diagnostic so I can see what's going on with their identity. I want to see which one of these 12 dimensions are already where they need to be. I want to see which one of these 12 dimensions are not where they need to be. And I want to see which dimensions are fighting with each other. I want to see, is there any complications within these 12 dimensions? But what I know from 20 years of doing this work, that if I start at number one, if I get you believing what rich people believe, you're going to accidentally start doing things that rich people do. If I get you expecting things that rich people expect, you're going to accidentally start behaving like rich people behave. If I get you paying attention to things that rich people pay attention to, if I get you to stop paying attention to things that poor people pay attention to, you're gonna accidentally start behaving like a rich person. If I get you emoting, if I get you sitting in the emotional state that rich people ain't got in, it's gonna be a lot easier for you to do the things that rich people do. If I get the inner voice, if I get your inner dialogue talking to yourself the way that rich people talk to themselves, if I get all 12 of these dimensions moving in the way that rich people move, if I get most of these dimensions— I ain't even got to get all 12 of them— if I get most of these dimensions, moving the way that rich people move, you're gonna accidentally start doing some rich shit. You're gonna accidentally start asking some rich questions. You're gonna accidentally start hanging out in some rich environments. You're gonna accidentally start— stuff that you used to say yes to, you guys still say, hell no, I'm not doing that. What the hell? Why would I do that? That's stupid. 6 months ago it wasn't. Hell, 6 days ago it wasn't. But as you start believing different and expecting different and paying attention to different things and emoting different and talking to yourself different Things that used to make sense ain't all of a sudden don't make sense no more. Things that used to feel like a good investment of your time all of a sudden feel like a waste of your time. And if you hang out in that environment, the bank account has no choice but to respond. If you hang out in that environment. Now what happens if you put a cup of water in the freezer for 30 seconds and you take it out? Nothing. Well, I ain't gonna say nothing. It might've got a few degrees colder, but cooler. But you understand that 30 seconds is not enough to freeze the water. Cause somebody right now saying, Coach Jay, I tried that and it didn't work. You right. You tried it. The word try implies failure. If I say, hey, I'm moving Saturday, you think you can help? And my homeboy said, man, I'm gonna try. I gotta see what wife he talking about. He not coming. I gotta find somebody else. He not coming. If you paid me, imagine what, imagine how you would feel. I want you to use your imagination. Imagine this. Imagine you paid me for a session and I tried to show up. Imagine you paid me for a session yesterday and I'm supposed to be in a session with you right now and I'm on TikTok and you come in the comments, you say, coach, we supposed to be in the session. I said, oh man, I tried. I forgot. I go live at this time. I tried, man. I forgot I go live every day. I can't do it right now. You gonna say, well, tell you what, man, just, just give me my money back. Imagine this, imagine this, imagine I said, okay, hey, I'm gonna try to give you your money back. You gonna say, what the hell? What you mean you gonna try? You don't want me to try to give you your money back. You want me to give you your money back. You want me to go in Stripe, go into my dashboard and give you your— you don't want me to try to give your money back. You want me to give your money back. So why are you trying to quit smoking? Why are you trying to lose weight? Why are you trying to start a business? You don't want me trying when it comes to your money. You don't want me trying when it comes to your time. You don't want me trying when it comes to your feelings. Why are you trying to get the thing? No, get it. I'm getting it. I don't know how. I don't know exactly how, but I— that's mine. Have it. Don't try. Have it. Put a 1 in the chat if this stuff making sense. Ain't nothing you can't be. Ain't nothing you can't do. Ain't nothing you can't have. Your only limit in your life is your identity. And if you start building your identity on purpose and living your life on accident, you'll be surprised what you accidentally accomplish. Start building the identity on purpose, and I promise you, you're gonna accidentally start doing some really amazing things. Start believing on purpose. Stop letting your beliefs be random. Like we live in a time where people drive designer cars, wear designer clothes and belts and sunglasses and purses, but your identity is an accident. Your identity is an accident. You're not still dressing like the people who raised you, but you're thinking like the people who raised you. You moved out of the house, but you didn't move out of the identity. You didn't move out of the patterns. You didn't move out of the belief systems and the attentional focus. Do you— not gonna do it on purpose. I mean, you're not gonna do it on accident. You're going to— like, you don't build an amazing life on accident. You don't build an amazing life on accident. Building an amazing life is going to require— listen to me— it's going to require you to stop chasing things and start becoming who you would be if you already had the things. Even the scriptures say, seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all of these things will be added unto you. Where did Jesus say that the kingdom of heaven was? Let me give you a hint. He didn't say it was up there. He didn't say it was over there. He didn't say it was under that rock. He said it was in you. Seek first in you. Seek first the kingdom of God in you. Go first within. Get that right. Get that aligned. Get that righteous, and all of the things will be added unto you. Stop chasing things. Stop chasing things. As long as you chasing things, things will run from you. You don't chase things; you be the version of you that has the thing. You don't chase money; you be the version of you that money is attracted to. You slow down and say, "What do people money chase? The the people who money is literally chasing them. I wonder what they believe. Okay, I'm gonna start believing that. I wonder what they expect. Okay, I'm gonna start expecting that." I wonder what they pay attention to. I'm gonna start paying attention to that. I wonder what they ignore. I'm about to start ignoring that. I wonder how they feel most of the time. I'm gonna start doing my best to feel that way most of the time. I wonder what their inner voice is. I wonder how do they talk to theyself. I'm gonna start talking to myself that way. I wonder what their perspective as they look out into the world is. Are they seeing problems or are they seeing solutions? Hmm, okay. I'm gonna start seeing the world through those lens. I wonder what their values hierarchy is. I wonder what's priority one, what's priority two, what's priority three. Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna do my best to make my values hierarchy align with that. I wonder what their behavior response is. I wonder how how do how how do they go about turning their thoughts into into behavior? Forget things. They talk about thoughts become things. No, thoughts become behaviors, and those behaviors are the are the the midwife to the thing. You skip the step. Thoughts thoughts become things, but yeah, there's a behavior in the midst of that thing. Sometimes behavior is on your part, sometimes it's on other people's part, but there is a behavior. Okay, don't skip the behavior. Somatic identity. I wonder what people who have that result, I wonder how they feel. Like, um, I was in a session recently with a guy and he was talking about how he really admires how President Obama speaks. He loves his cadence, he loves his, his confidence, he loves how he can constantly break one of the fundamental rules of speaking and still be an amazing orator. So he was coming to get hypnotized so I could hypnotize him to speak like Barack Obama. And he thought I was gonna say, okay, take a deep breath in, close your eyes. From now on, when you walk on stage, you put your shoulders back, you put your chest out, and you put your chin up. Nod your head if you understand. In a second, I will snap my fingers and you will open your eyes and you will start to accidentally speak like— that's not what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna hypnotize you, but I'm gonna hypnotize you to believe the type of things that a speaker like that likely believes in. To expect the outcomes that a person who speaks like that likely expects. I'm finna hypnotize you to pay attention to the people who nod in their head, to the people who get it, to the people who leaning in, and to ignore the people who are rolling their eyes. I'm finna make the people who not your target audience invisible. I'm finna amplify the people that are your target audience. I'm finna change how you feel. As you step on the stage to give a speech, I'm gonna change the way that you talk to yourself as you prepare for the speech and as you go. As I change all twelve of those things to align with that of an amazing orator, oh man, you're gonna accidentally get up there and be an amazing orator. Forget the thing. What's the recipe to the thing? Forget the thing. What's the recipe to the thing? The question I've been asking in the live this last week is: Let's say you come over to my house. And I give you the best slice of cake you've ever had. You've never had a piece of cake that tastes this good. You say, "Ooh, Jay, can I get one more piece of cake?" I say, "Tell you what, I give you one more piece of cake or I give you the recipe. Which one you want? If you want the cake, say cake. If you want the recipe, say recipe. If you want the cake, say cake. If you want the recipe, say recipe." Gotta make sure I'm in the room with the right people. If you want the cake, I'm gonna be honest with you. This ain't even the room for you. You can just go ahead and dismiss yourself. This is a room for people who understand the importance of the recipe. My grandmother died back in October, and I'm gonna miss my grandmother, true enough. But you know what else I'm gonna miss? My grandmother's banana pudding. I remember my grandmother had been dead for for about a month, month and a half, and one day it hit me. I'm like, wow! Hold on, wait. I'm never gonna taste that banana pudding again. Like, I've had other people's banana pudding. I've never had another banana pudding that tastes like my grandmother's banana pudding. And I, I'm not gonna lie, I had to— I had already mourned my grandmother, then I had to mourn the banana pudding. So I went down just scrolling through my text messages, looking at some old text messages between me and my grandmother, and I ended up far back in our messages. I'm like in 2020. Shout out to the iCloud. I'm far back in our messages, and I come over a sticky note with Granny's recipe for the banana pudding. Understand that I don't cook. I'm not— I could grill, I can cook some breakfast food, but I don't cook. But I looked at the recipe. I'm like, I could do that. I could do that. I could do that. Ask me why 3 or 4 hours later I was tasting that same pudding. I put some in a cup and I took it to my sister's house. I said, taste this. She said, what's this? I said, just taste it. She said, where you get this from? I said, I made it. She said, quit lying. I said, I made it. I showed her the text message. I said, I found Granny's recipe in our text message. She sent it to me years ago. Because I had the recipe, Granny is gone, but I could still get the banana pudding. When you come kick it with Coach J, I want you to feel good. I want you to vibe while you're here. I want you to have a good time. I want you to tap the screen. Y'all should. But I want you to leave with the understanding Of this recipe, Coach J not going home with you, but you got access to that recipe 24/7. If you call Coach J at 4 a.m., he's gonna curse you out, but you got that. You got access to that recipe 24/7. If you come knock on Coach J's front door, he's gonna curse you out, but you got access to that recipe 24/7. Get the recipe. When you see people who have things that you want, instead of going, man, how did they get it? I would love it for you if you became the type of person say, man, I wonder what's the recipe. If you see somebody who got the body that you want, if you see somebody who has a lifestyle that you want, if you see somebody who has certain patterns, certain behaviors that you like, stop trying to go directly for the behavior and saying, man, I wonder, I wonder what's the recipe behind that baby. If you get the recipe and just follow the recipe, you're going to accidentally, accidentally start to emulate the behavior. Does this make sense? Does this make sense? Identity, identity, identity. I love identity so much that the name of my practice is literally Identity 2.0. 20 years of doing this work, 20 years of playing in other people's mind has taught me I don't got to change the behavior, change the identity. I don't got to make you quit smoking. I got to build you the identity of a nonsmoker. I don't got to make you be confident. I got to build you an identity that don't really give you another choice. Coach Jay, I struggle with consistency. No, you're being consistent to the identity that you've built. You, you, you are being consistent with people who believe what you believe. You're being very consistent with people who expect what you expect. You're being very consistent with people who pay attention to what you pay attention to. You're being very consistent with people who talk to theyself the way that you talk to yourself. I don't gotta make you be consistent. You already consistent. Does that make sense? Because Jay, I struggle with consistency. Bullshit. You doing something consistently. And as we start, like, it blows my mind. People tell me they struggle with consistency, and as I start talking to them, I find out you on season six of this show. How the hell you get on season six of a show when you struggle with consistency? No, you consistent. How you done seen Tyler Perry drop a new show every other day? You done seen everything that Tyler Perry ever wrote, but you struggle with consistency? No, you consistent. You eat the same 4 or 5 things over and over again. You go to the same 10 places over and over again. You drive the same path to work every, every— what you mean you struggle with consistency? No, what you struggle with is clarity. What you struggle with is a goal. What you struggle with is knowing where you headed. What you struggle with is focusing on what you don't want more than you focus on what You won't, but friend, I promise you, you consistent. Coach Jay, I struggle with confidence. Bullshit. You confident in something right now? It sounds like you confident in your failure. And if you new here, I'm Coach Jay. I coach bosses. So if you, if you need to be babied and you want to take six months to get your result, don't come over here. But if you want to get a result in sixty days or less and you can handle being spoken to this way, then pull up. We got you. We got room for you. This is not therapy. This this is coaching. This is not hypnotherapy. This is this is coaching. This is holding the mirror up to you so we can acknowledge the be the BS. Say ouch and fix it, man. Say ouch and fix it. There's nothing you can't be. There's nothing you can't do. There's nothing you can't have. Your only limit is your identity. Build the damn identity. Stop wishing for things and build the identity. You are a creator. You can have it. You can have it. You can have it. There's nothing you can't be. There's nothing you can't do. There's nothing you can't have. I say it over and over again because it's true. I say it over and over again because it's true. You could be, do, and have anything you desire, but you gotta start at the level of identity. There are lots of people online who want to teach you processes and techniques and give you the sell this product, sell this course, sell this, this thing. Listen, I'm not saying it's not a time and place, but I've been an entrepreneur for a long time. I love sales. I love funnels and value letters and writing sales. I love all of that stuff. But your funnel can only be as strong as the identity behind it. Your funnel can only be as strong as the identity behind it. Your CRM and the automations that run in your business can only be like a funnel is a delivery system. If the funnel is delivering you with a diminished identity, Good luck. Fix the identity. Identity is the one thing you can work on and enhance every area of your life. You work on your, your identity, your marriage gonna accidentally get better. You work on your identity, you gonna accidentally get more concerned with your fitness. You work on your identity, you gonna accidentally start eating different. You accidentally start parenting. But identity is the one thing that you work on that's gonna simultaneously fix every other area of your life. Everything flows through your identity. Everything flows through the way that you see yourself as being. Fix the identity. Like a lot of times people show up, they think they got 17 problems. No, you got a broken identity, and those all 17 of those problems are a reflection of this broken identity. Fix the identity, Fred. Fix the identity for Coach J. How do I fix the identity? The five C's. We're gonna get clear about what you want. We're gonna get crystal clear about what you want. Most people don't know what they want. They know what they don't want, and it's their favorite subject. Most people, you get 'em talking about what they don't want, you can't get 'em to shut up. Jay, I've been working at this company for 5 years. Keep in mind, I got a master's degree and they only pay me $50,000 a year. What am I supposed to do with $50,000 in this economy? I got a friend that don't even have a degree, Jay, and he makes $83,000 a year. How does a woman without a degree make more money than a woman with a degree? And when I first started working here, it was a remote position. I never had to come into the office. Now they got me coming into the office 3 days a week, Jay. 3 days a week. Keep in mind, I live 45 minutes away from the office and they got me working every other weekend. Jay, my son plays soccer. How am I supposed to be at this game every of the weekend and be— and then my husband, Jay, don't even get me started on him. He not doing— I said, oh yeah, hey, let me, let me, let me ask you something. What do you want? Well, Jay, I'm just tired of people who don't— That's not what I asked you, sis. Listen, what do you want? Well, Jay, I just feel like nobody understands. Hey, right, 1, 2, 3, wide awake. Because right now you're literally hypnotized by what you don't want. You so wrapped up in what you don't want That I've asked you what you want twice, and you proceeded to tell me more about what you don't want. We only got an hour together. If I let you spend the whole hour talking about what you don't want, you're gonna show up feel you're gonna leave feeling exactly how you was feeling when you showed up. I need you to take a deep breath, and I need you to join me in this room. I need you to put I need you to get you a handful of work and throw it as far as you can throw it. No, no. And I'm not just saying imagine. I want you to grab a handful of work and I want you to throw it as far as you could throw it. Okay? I want you to grab your home line. I want you to throw it as far as you could throw it. Now I want you to literally pick up this room, pick up this environment. I want you to sit it in front of you. All right. I'm gonna ask you again. What do you want? Then she's gonna say, well, Jay, I just want peace. And that's your problem. That right there is your problem. The thing that you gotta understand about your nervous system. Is it responds to energy? It responds to emotion. Okay. When you talk about what you don't want, you got a whole bunch of energy. You got a whole bunch of emotion. You got stories. You got hand gestures. You got facial expressions. You got evidence. You got proof. You got data. You got other people who get it. You got all of this energy behind what you don't want. When I finally get you to talk about what you want, you want peace. Oh, if you really want to piss Coach J off, you gonna say something like, "See, I just want to live on my highest timeline." Jay, I just want to open my third eye. Jay, I just want to quantum leap. You weren't talking about metaphysics and chakras and timelines when you were talking about what you don't want. When you were talking about what you don't want, you were telling me real stories with real characters, and it was, it was causing real feelings in your body, and, and it was changing, it was changing how your real endocrine system behaves. It was changing how your real reticular activation system behaves. And it was creating these feelings in your body. My first step is always, I want you to be able to define what you want with the same level of clarity, with the same level of energy, with the same level of enthusiasm that you can currently describe what you don't want. Because when you look up the word manifest, when you look up the word manifest, it means to make obvious to the mind. That's all it means. It doesn't mean to hope for it. It doesn't mean to wish for it. It doesn't mean to stare at a vision board till the veins pop out of your freaking forehead. It doesn't mean to say 8 billion freaking affirmations a day. It means to make obvious to the mind. Now, if you've made it obvious to your mind that the gas costs too much and the eggs cost too much and nobody can thrive under this administration and the rich people have too much money and that's why I don't have enough and the TikTok algorithm is hurting me and things, if that's what you're making obvious to your mind, that's what you're manifesting. Pay attention. If that's what you're believing, the first dimension, that's what you're manifesting. If that's what you're expecting, the second dimension, that's what you're manifesting. If that's what you're paying attention to, the third dimension, that's what you're manifesting. If that's what's controlling how you feel, the fourth dimension, that's, that's what you're manifesting. If the inner voice inside of you, if that's all it talks about, that's all it thinks about on repeat, that's what you're— That's what you're manifesting. Manifesting. If you don't like it, you got to put that down so you can pick this up. So no, you don't want peace. What, what, what do you want? I'm not gonna say you don't want peace, but if you woke up tomorrow and you had peace, how would you know? And I want you to be able to give me that story with the same emphasis, with the same level of detail that you could tell me what you don't want. Because we got to be able to— like, it, it really blows my mind when people think they could tell Source what to do when they can't even tell theyself what to do. This is a conversation that I have with younger hypnotists all the time, sometimes not so young hypnotists. If you can't control your endocrine system from inside of you, if you can't talk yourself out of a funk, if you can't talk yourself out of a bad mood, if you can't change your state, how in the hell you finna make somebody else quit smoking? If you can't tell you what to do from inside of you, how are you gonna tell somebody else what to do from outside of them? Before you could tell Source what to do, you got to learn how to tell you what to do. Before you can tell a bank account what to do, you got to learn how to tell your thoughts what to think, tell your feelings what to feel, and tell your focus where to focus. Damn, right? Right? Like, it blows my mind. Jay, my wife, she won't submit. Why would she? Your own cells won't even submit to you. Your own endocrine system hasn't even submitted to you. Why would another person's cells— why would another person's endocrine system submit to a person that their own nervous system hasn't submitted? What are you— what are you saying? What's she supposed to do, follow you off the edge of a freaking cliff? Does that make sense? You got to take control over you. So for those of you who are new here, I'm Coach Jay. I've been a hypnotist for 20 freaking years. One thing that playing in other people's minds for 20 years has taught me is that I have control over one person. I have control over one person. Guess who that one person is? Let me give you a hint. It's not my son. It's not my wife. It's not my daughter. It's not my other son. It's not my kids. It's not my wife. I don't have control over them. I have control over me. Let me tell you where it gets cold and what being a hypnotist has taught me. Through my ability to control me, I can influence anybody. Through my ability to control me, I can influence anybody. Like when people say I'm a hypnotist, when people find out I'm a hypnotist and they say, oh, don't, don't hypnotize me. I'm confused. Hypnotize you for what? Why do I need to hypnotize you when I know how to hypnotize me? I know how to make me focus. I know how to make me lock in. I know how to make me sit down at my desk and say, hey, I'm not getting up till I understand this subject. I know how to make me go live consistent. I know how to make me lock in and do what I need. I don't need it because I know how to hypnotize me. I can live where I want to live, drive where I want to What I want to drive, vacation. I can make the money. I don't need anything for you. I know how to hypnotize me. I really wish you would learn how to hypnotize you. I don't need anything from you. I get what I want because I know how to influence me. I know how to tell my thoughts what to do. I know how to tell my feelings how to feel. I know how to tell my focus where to go. I know how to control my expected. I don't need nothing from you. And plus, if I was going to hypnotize you, you would have a fat ass invoice in your inbox right now. That's like walking up to a shelf and saying, "You better not cook me a steak." You're like, I wasn't planning on it. You know how many steaks I didn't cook today? You know, it's like, I really would love it for you if you learned how to influence you. Like when people find out I'm a hypnotist, they usually say one or two things. They either say the first thing, don't hypnotize me, or they say, ooh, can you teach me how to hypnotize other people? You don't need to know how to hypnotize other people. If you know how to hypnotize you, you can have anything you want. When you know how to hypnotize you, you can have anything you want. How did this a hypnosis ministry real change for sure? I don't know. I think that I think autocorrect might have got you alive, but yeah, man. If when you know, so what you gotta understand is you're already hypnotizing yourself. Like hypnosis is not nearly as mystic as TV makes it seem. What you gotta understand is hypnosis is a three-step process. We call it ABS capture the attention. Bypass the critical mind, stimulate the subconscious. Capture the attention, bypass the critical mind, stimulate the subconscious. Okay? When somebody comes into my office and they want to quit smoking, or they want to quit biting their nails, or they want to have unshakable confidence, or they want to walk in the room with their shoulders back, their chest out, and their chin up, they want to speak with confidence, they want to sell more stuff, they want to learn how to overcome objections, whatever the problem is, what I'm gonna do is I'm going to capture their attention. Now people always think about the pocket watch. The pocket watch is not special within its way. This pocket watch is about capturing attention. Look at this watch. Look at my hand. Take a deep breath in. Look at that spot on the pocket watch. There's nothing special. It's about capturing attention. Guess what? In order to fall into a TV show, you might have to look at it. If you a teacher and you need to teach the kids, you might got to get them looking at you. The pocket watch is nothing special. The pocket watch is attention. It's step one. No, I need your attention. If you talking to your kids and they looking somewhere else, what you gonna say? Hey, look at me. Put the phone down. Look at me. I'm talking to you. If you talking to your spouse and they looking away, you probably gonna feel like they're not— you're gonna say, baby, you listening? Baby, you hear me? They say, yeah, I hear you. But they still— you're like, no, hey, look at me. I need— I'm trying to influence you. I'm trying to take ideas out of my head and push them over to you. I'm trying. Can you— can you look at me, please? Does that make sense? So step one to hypnosis is attention. Step two is bypass the critical mind. Hey, prefrontal cortex, go for a walk. Hey, prefrontal cortex, take a stroll. Hey, prefrontal cortex, I need you to stop overanalyzing every little thing and just let me. I need you to stop taking everything so literal and just let me digest this information. So when you in a conversation with somebody, they say, okay, hold on, let's let's stick a pin in it. Let's take that idea. We're gonna sit it over here. We're gonna come back to that later. Logically, that makes no sense. You can't take an idea and put it over here and come back to it. It's an It's gone. Like, it's— you don't pick up an idea and sit. But when the prefrontal cortex is out of the way, you say, okay, I got it. We gonna take that idea, put it over there. Then from there, we start to stimulate the subconscious. We start to change how you feel. And you start to follow along. And as somebody is talking to you, if they, uh, describing a restaurant they ate at over the weekend, as they're talking to you, you seeing images, you feeling feelings, you remembering things that you've done that, that, that are similar. Their words are directing your focus. That's hypnosis. If you go to a comedy club, a good comedian is going to come out and he's going to hypnotize you. He's going to capture your attention. He's going to bypass your critical mind. He's going to stimulate your subconscious. You're not gonna laugh unless he do all three. If he just get your attention, but he don't bypass your critical mind and stimulate your subconscious, you're gonna be going, man, who is next? Like, where y'all get this man from? Makes sense. If somebody offends you, guess what they just did? They captured your attention. They bypassed your critical mind. They stimulated your subconscious. You wouldn't be offended unless they did all 3. If they just got your attention, you wouldn't be offended. If they just got your attention and bypassed your critical mind, but then didn't do anything with it, you wouldn't be offended. The fact that you are offended— let's pay attention to it— the fact that you are offended means that they either said or did something, you processed it, and after you processed this thing that they said or did, Your endocrine system is doing things that it wasn't doing before they said it. Your nervous system is doing things that it wasn't doing before they said it. You're seeing images that you weren't seeing before they did. You're hearing sounds, you're feeling feelings that you weren't feeling before. That's hypnosis. It's already happening. You just need to start doing it on purpose. You just need to start doing it on purpose. Sometimes we'll be out and about and I'll be watching a couple have a tense argument. And the hypnotist in me like, oh bro, you need to take a hypnosis course. She is— you got to work on your hypnosis. Hypnotists are really good listeners. Like, let's say I went to downtown Dallas and decided I was going to do some entertainment hypnosis. I was going to glue people to the ground, stick their hands to their head, make them forget their names. I was going to do all of this crazy stuff. Somebody might say, bro, I don't feel like that's going to work on me. As a hypnotist, my ears just perked up. He didn't say that don't look like it'll work on me. He didn't say I don't think that'll work on me. He didn't say I don't believe that'll work on me. He said I don't feel like that'll work on me. Come here, my kinesthetic friend. Stand right here because you're kinesthetic. If I can move your body, you, you attach with your body. I can move your body, your mind. I, I'm gonna easily move your, your mind. Stand right here. Shake my sleep all the way down. He's a filler. Now somebody say that don't look like that's gonna work on me. Come here, look at my hand. You're visual. Somebody say, man, that don't sound like it'll work on me. They're auditory. A hypnotist is a really good listener, and a hypnotist is really good at hearing what you're saying and also hearing what you're not saying and reading in between the lines. And if I start to understand how you build a problem, it becomes very easy to knock the legs from under that table. If somebody come into my office and they say, Jay, man, everywhere I look that there's a problem, I can't see my way through this, man. I go home, there's a stack of bills sitting on the table. Everywhere I look is things that need to be fixed around, around the house, man. It's just not enough money to see me through the month. That is a visual person. Now, if I start talking to a visual person about kinesthetic solutions, we're going to lose that person. But if somebody else walks up and say, Jay, I just feel like life is weighing me down, man, I feel like an elephant is sitting on my shoulders. Every time I go to the office, I get this this pit in my stomach when it when it's time for me to make calls and follow up with my leads, man. It's like my stomach just drops to the floor. That's a kinesthetic person. His problem isn't what he's seeing. His problem isn't what he's hearing. His problem is what he is feeling. Hypnosis is not magic. It looks like magic when you're really good at it. Like a Harlem Globetrotter, they can do some things with a basketball to make it look. It's not magic. They just really they spent a lot of time with a down basketball. Now you put that same basketball in my hand, you're not gonna get the same result. But a hypnotist is a person who has learned how to do that with vocabulary, who has learned how to do that with silence and facial expressions and patience and quickly being able to reverse engineer patterns. That, that's what's at play when, when you're dealing with a, a good hypnotist. And some of the best hypnotists I know don't even know that they're hypnotists. Like one of my favorite hypnotists is Dave Chappelle, master hypnotist. Now if you tell Dave Chappelle he's a master hypnotist, he's gonna say, I'm a comedian, what are you talking about? I'm a comedian. Dave Chappelle is a master hypnotist. Things— the way that he paces and leads, things that he does with his tone and his pauses and his timing— master hypnotist, phenomenal hypnotist. But yeah, you already being hypnotized. You gotta get clear about what you want and start using that hypnosis to frame the 12 dimensions in a way that gives you no choice but to accomplish that thing. You gotta stop relying so heavily on willpower. Willpower is a scam. Willpower is a scam. Or the way that I explain it to my clients is willpower does have a place in the process, but most people misuse willpower. Most people think that willpower is supposed to follow them around like a babysitter. They say, don't touch that, don't touch this, don't eat that, don't say that, don't think that, don't feel it. No, that's not how willpower works. You don't use willpower to control your body. You use willpower to direct your mind. I'm gonna say that again. You might wanna write that one down. You do not use willpower to control your body. You use willpower to figure out what you want and align those 12 dimensions. Does that make sense? You don't use willpower to make— like, let's always use that example of Kobe Bryant. You got to understand, Kobe Bryant was not using willpower to get out of bed at 4 AM and go work out. Kobe Bryant had an identity to where staying in bed felt like suffocating. He didn't have to use willpower to get out of bed. He used the willpower to build a Mamba Mentality. He used the willpower to focus on what that Mamba Mentality required him to focus on. He used willpower to believe what the Mamba Mentality required him to. As you get to believe in that way, expecting that way, and paying attention to that way, man, you'll accidentally do the things. Could you please repeat that description again? Which one? I think you might be talking about what Lux just said for you. Hold on, let me pin it. That's not what I was trying to do. Give me a second, this other screen popped up. I gotta set up another— I gotta set up the other monitor. Let me see here. All right, pin comment. All right, is that what you wanted me to say again? That comment I just pinned? Lux got you. Lux got you, guys. Ain't nothing you can't be, ain't nothing you can't do, ain't nothing you can't have. If you new here, I know I done threw a whole lot at you. You got to get you the ebook so you could be able to, to study. Uh, I gotta see what's going on. My computer is free spinning. Okay, there we go. We caught up now. Um, but if you're new here, you gotta grab the ebook so that you can be able to keep up and study. If you want our ebook, it's free. It's gonna put you on my email list and you're gonna get some emails from us. If you don't want my emails, you can't have my book. Sorry. Not sorry, but it's really— it's a lot of really good stuff in the book, man. I'll let y'all take a peek at the table of contents. So still, first shot is what we was just talking about. You already hypnotized, and the people doing hypnosis, they they don't want you to know you. Like hypnosis is weird because it's a lot like explaining explaining water to a fish. The fish is saying, "What's this water?" And you saying, "It's right here." The fish is saying, "I don't see it." Well, you gonna have a hard time seeing something that you were literally born into. You gonna have a hard time seeing something that you've never stepped foot out of. You want the ebook? I'm gonna put it in the— I'm gonna put it in the comments. I could do it on YouTube. They don't like when I do it over here on TikTok. Give me a second. Boom, there you go. So you go there, grab the— grab the ebook, grab that. So that's what the first chapter is about. You already hypnotized. Second chapter is about fuck affirmations. You heard me correctly. Fuck affirmations. I hope you never do another one again. Stop topic. If you like doing arts and crafts, just because— like, if you're the type of person who likes scrapbooking and stuff, vision board your way out. But if you not a vision— if you're not like a crafts person that just enjoy doing arts and crafts, throw the damn vision board away. It's a waste of time. Uh, if you want— if you're on TikTok and you want the ebook, click that orange little box down there at the bottom left and just send me a message and say ebook. I'll send it to you when I get off the live. I'll send you the link to go get it when you— when I get off the live. They don't like when I just hand y'all the links. What's going on, Dr. Renee? All right, the next chapter is on something we call the neural bank, where you start paying yourself to become what we call Identity 2.0. Real cool concept. And if you in our portal, we actually got a system built into the portal that makes it really easy for you to do that every night. Uh, next chapter, 12 Dimensions of Identity. That's the belief architecture, expect— expectation patterns, attentional focus, emotional baseline. Those are the 12 things that I'm always I never touched behavior. I touched all 12 of those dimensions, and behavior responds to those 12 dimensions. Like the thing that people forget about behaviors—behavior doesn't show up out of thin air. You didn't just say, "Okay, you know what? I think it's time to procrastinate." No, you thought about something. You felt something. You remember something. You expected something. A feeling showed. Something hap something happened, and then you procrastinated. We don't got to stop the procrastination. We got to figure out what's happening that's causing the procrastination because most of the time. Procrastination is actually a healthy response to what's happening. Like procrastination is a healthy response if you are visualizing people throwing tomatoes at you when you go on the stage. Procrastination is a healthy response if your internal dialogue say you know it's not gonna work, you know they're not gonna believe in your own mama, don't even support you, nobody nobody ever believe. Procrastination is a healthy response if that's the conversation you're having, which is we don't got to stop the procrastination. I would be worried if you were having that. That, that type of internal dialogue and wasn't procrastinating. Does that make sense? Like, it's not about how do I stop this behavior, what's causing this behavior? Because most of the time the behavior is healthy in alignment with the dimension. It— the behavior is on brand for a dimension. Like, sometimes when I look at people's— I'm gonna show y'all like an identity diagnostic that I did this past week with a guy as he was describing what he was going through. I'm like, yeah, that makes— I'm looking at your identity diagnostic. That makes sense. I would be surprised if you wasn't doing that as I look at this. We don't gotta fix that. That's a healthy response to this. And this is— and I'm looking at it. This is not a willpower problem. This is not a la— he, he kept saying, I'm lazy. I'm lazy. I'm lazy. No, that's what your parents have been telling you. But this is a I don't believe in myself problem. This is not la— I, I, I'll, I'll show you an identity diagnostic that this, this lazy, this, this isn't lazy. This is a belief problem. This is a way. This is a way that I talk to myself isn't serving me problem. You got a body that's ready. Let me pull up this identity diagnostic. What time is it? Okay, it's ten thirty seven. I gotta get off here in a little bit. Y'all got an eleven o'clock. So we finna look at this. This is a guy I was working with about two weeks ago. I think time moves so quick. I don't. I don't know. I can't keep up. Okay. So this guy came in because he was quote unquote lazy and he was sleeping his his life. That at least that's what he thought. So as I'm looking at his identity diagnostic, I say, hey man, guess what? You're not lazy. I'm looking at this. You're not lazy. This is what's going on. The engine runs, but nothing is pulling on it. The engine runs, but nothing is pulling on it. So when I look at identity, I always start with what I call the core contradiction. When people need my help, there's always a contradiction at play. I think I can, but I don't feel like I can. Some days, Jay, some days I feel on top of the world. Other days I don't. Sometimes I got access to my confidence. Sometimes I know I'm always looking for what's the contradiction. So the contradiction that was screaming at me as I looked at his identity diagnostic is that his somatic identity was at 83%. That means he's connected in his body. He feels connected to the future. Things that he has a clear goal on, he will take action. Somatic identity is at 83%. He's not carrying guilt in his gut. He's not carrying stress in his shoulders. He's not getting weird tension headaches. Schematically, he's good to go. Behavior responses is at 77%. It's not perfect, but it's damn sure not lazy. Behavior responses, this is not a lazy person that I'm looking at. So that, that's good. That's solid. But the gap is his temporal orientation is at 23%. His temporal, the way that he exists in time. Anytime we talk about temporal, we're talking about how he exists in time, his story of the past and What he believes about himself to come in the future is at 23%. Okay, this is why you procrastinating. And your inner voice is at 40%. This is why you procrastinating. You could throw all the willpower in the world at this and it's going to mess with your confidence because what's going to happen is you're going to look at how much willpower and how much effort you've put into it and it's still not working when you working on the wrong piece of the puzzle. Does that make sense? You working on the part that's not broken. This is not a willpower problem. Your behavior responses are at 77%, but your behavior is being choked out by this temporal orientation and this inner voice. That's the work. That's the work. Okay? And that's what I'm— the bottom line, behavior's at 77%. It's not the problem. Nothing is pulling on it. So as we started talking, I'm like, man, what's your goals? Where you want to be 10 years from now? What you excited about? I don't, I don't really know. I don't really know. But as I dug back, because he, he in his early 20s, as I dug back in, in high school, he was the guy. Made good grades, played sports, did all the stuff. As long as he had other people setting a goal for him, he would show up and deliver. As long as he had somebody saying, hey, we got a test Friday, he would show up and deliver. Game Friday, he would show up and deliver. Hey guys, read chapters 3, read the first 3 chapters today, we're going to discuss them tomorrow. He'll deliver. For the first time in his life, he Yeah. And now he's having to set his own goals and his inner voice is at 40%. Inner voice had been at 40%, but he had somebody else setting the goals for him and he had a baby response that was at 77. So he was able to do it. But now he's at a point when parents are saying, I don't know, what do you wanna do? What do you think? What do you think? And it's hard to answer that question when your inner voice is at 40%. Hard to answer that question when temporal orientation is at 23%. So what I did purposely on our first meeting, I gave him a whole bunch of unnecessary homework. Not because I wanted him to do the homework, but because I knew he would, because it was a clear goal in front of him. Then when he showed up, I told him, hey man, you understand I gave you an unreasonable amount of homework? I gave you an amount of homework that you shouldn't have been able to complete. I had you doing things that really don't freaking matter, but because there was a clear goal in front of you, do you see how you You, you just did it. I say, was it hard? You say, no, I just, I just knocked it out, man. I looked at it, I knew it was like— I knew we had 7 days, so I did, uh, I did an hour that day after I met with you, and I just pretty much threw an hour at it every day. It wasn't— oh, oh, I say, man, we, we cooking. Do you, do you see the pattern? This is not a willpower problem. This is not a will— this is a I don't have goals problem. And even when I get goals, I gotta build a bridge to my goals, and I gotta stop talking to myself Like I'm an idiot because my mind bleed me when I talk to it. Then we look when we look through his um twelve dimensions, temporal orientation already talked about that. That's what it looks like at twenty-three percent. Inner voice, that's what it looks like at forty percent. This is what I'm just showing. I'm like, bro, you're not broken. You you got a broken system, but you're not broken. Your inner voice is at forty percent. Your emotional baseline is at forty-three percent. Your expectations is at forty-three percent. Belief architecture's at 40%. Intentional focus is 53%. We got 3 things in the solid dimension. And in high school, the, when you got other people setting the goals for you, these 3 things can get you through. But in this college life where you gotta set your own goals and you're not in the same house with mom and dad and you can go to class or not go to class, man, we gotta fix that inner voice. We gotta fix that inner voice. As we looked at the handwriting, it just reconfirmed a bunch of what I already saw. Lower zone barely develops. Lower— when we talk about lower zone, we're talking about that lowercase g, that lowercase y, those lower loops and how they extend. It tells me a lot of information about follow-through and drive and how effectively do you take ideas out of your mind and pass them into your body. So then we got into the session plan. Now, as you look at my session plan, you're gonna notice I don't mess with behavior. Behavior isn't broken. First session, I want to work on his attentional architecture. We got to fix his attention. We got to pay— we got to change what he noticed when he walks into a room. We got to check— turn him to the type of person that sees solutions where he used to see problems. Then we got to change his emotional floor. He's been— for the past few months, he's been witnessing a version of himself that hasn't been taking action, so he's starting to feel like the type of person who don't Take action. Now we got to wipe that feeling out. That's not true. That's not true. I got to get you feeling better. I got to get you feeling like the type of person that could do these things. Then we're going to work on his belief architecture because right now it's at 47%. We got to get him believing in himself. We got to get him believing in possibility. Then we're going to talk about his inner voice. We're going to change the way he talks to himself. Notice that I didn't do the way he talks to himself until I changed the way he felt and after I changed the way he paid attention to. Because if I change the way he talked to himself but I don't fix the attention first, The attention just gonna break the way that he talked to himself again. This is why I love identity diagnostic. It lets me look at things in a real— a lot of hypnotists, they just shoot from the freaking hip. Oh, you want to be confident? Sit back, close your eyes. You will walk in the rooms with your shoulders back and your chest out. Not if you don't take care of that belief architecture. Not if you don't take care of that inner dialogue. He might do it for a day or two, but I promise you, identity— what I call Identity 1.0— at the first sign of pressure, it's going to take back over. Then we're going to build a temporal bridge that connects him to this goal that he's now able to set because we've turned on the signal of his inner voice. Then we're going to build an expectation architecture to get him to become the type of young man that expects things to work out for him, that expects things to go well for him, that expects himself to be able to figure it out. Then we're going to make— build the identity resilience to make sure that our work holds, that he don't just feel great for a week. And go back to the old version of itself. Then we're gonna do a full future pace on all of it. This is what we do with the identity diagnostic. Anybody wants an identity diagnostic, they cost $99. You get to spend an hour with me and we break down your identity. And if you want to keep working with me on your identity, the $99 that you spend on the identity diagnostic goes towards the cost of your initial session. If you on TikTok and you want an identity diagnostic, Click that little orange box down there and just message me ID Diagnostic and I'll send you one. If you on, um, YouTube and you want one, just let me know and I'll give you the link. Well, I'm gonna just put the link on YouTube anyway so y'all can have it. And I see a few of y'all said ebook. I got y'all. Let me get off a few minutes before my session so I can have time to send all of y'all the ebook. But give me a second. That link that I just put over here on YT, that's where you guys go if you want an identity diagnostic. You take your identity diagnostic, you give me about 48 hours. So yeah, okay, so you, um, take the identity diagnostic and you, um, give me about 48 hours to compile your report. You and I, we jump on Zoom and we comb through your identity diagnostic. And I always love to see the look on people's faces when they realize, wait, that wasn't the— no, that was never the problem. That was always a symptom. The problem is this. All right guys, I'm finna get out here. It sound like you, D. I wasn't looking at these comments, guys. I, when I was looking at, when I, when I start talking about identity, I get, I get sucked in. So I'm looking back. How much for the ebook? The ebook is free. Um, The ebook is free. I know I throw a lot of information at y'all. The ebook, it's just 19 pages. It got a lot of my big ideas in it. But I love you guys. Anybody who wants that ebook, message me ebook. And anybody who wants an identity diagnostic, just message me identity diagnostic. I'll send you the links for both. And y'all, we got um. I ain't ready to flood it yet. I'll tell y'all about it here soon. We got some real cool stuff in the pipeline. Love y'all. Ain't nothing y'all can do about it. I will see y'all later. I'm gonna get ready to send y'all these messages and jump into session mode. All right, if you want it— oh no, send it to me in my inbox, um, Tana, so I can just be able to respond to your message with the link. So, um, DM me on here and I'll send it to you.
