The Chanukah Episode

Hey there, my name is Rabbi Jen Gubitz and I'm pumped to be joined by Rabbi Jodi Gordon as we welcome you to the OMFG podcast, Jewish wisdom for unprecedented times. Hey, Jodi.

Hey, friend. OMFG, what a fabulous four-letter word. Those four letters really do the trick from OMFG, Hanukkah starts Thanksgiving weekend? To OMFG, gelt is the Twinkies of Jewish junk food. To OMFG, applesauce and sour cream, but also what about cinnamon applesauce? As rabbis, we have come to know that when the stories of our lives meet the stories of Jewish tradition, transformation, growth, something awesome happens.

Jodi and I are experts on the letters J and G. Sending surprise gifts. FYI, her birthday is Thanksgiving, comfy pants, and eating breakfast for dinner because waffles. And we want to bring you to our conversations that express our love for Judaism and make it relevant in the world, as we mine Jewish wisdom for strength and resilience in these unprecedented times, with a dose of humor, because let's face it, not every rabbi is funny. And frankly, we feel we've proven ourselves by now.

Jen, can you believe it's almost Hanukkah? OMG!

I know. So to warm us up, how about a quick round of favorite things you've eaten fried? Ready?

Okay, first up for me, I studied abroad in Edinburgh, Scotland, where I learned about a fried Mars bar. And I'll tell you, a fried Mars bar is a delicious thing. You can eat some of and not feel ill. If you eat all of it, it might not go that well. What about you?

So my initial thought was pakoras and dosa because I'm on an Indian food kick, missing Indian buffet so hard. And in fact, I miss it all so much that when we recently had Indian takeout, I licked the chicken tikka masala takeout container as a fond farewell. So other fried foods you like, Jody, that maybe you lick the container?

Well, so last year, you know, I think there's— speaking of memes, there's the meme that's like, if you didn't have a baby, get a puppy, or an air fryer during the pandemic, like, did you even live through COVID? And I did get an air fryer. And so last year for Hanukkah, we experimented with different things you could air fry. And my most successful experiment was air fried dessert egg rolls. So I bought the like supermarket wonton or egg roll wrappers and then like Nutella and strawberries and bananas, like things that you would otherwise maybe put in like crepes, I guess. And then we wrapped them up and sealed them with like a little bit of butter or egg wash and put them in the air fryer and they were delicious. So highly recommend.

That's amazing. I just got us an air fryer lid for our Instant Pot. I'm the procurer in the home, so I'm excited to see what Matan does with this new air frying contraption. You know, when you mentioned study abroad, it reminded me of the ultimate fried food, which I studied abroad in Prague, and that food is called smažený sýr, which is fried cheese. Yeah, and they basically bring you a massive mozzarella stick, but it's like the size of a fillet. And so this is early on in my study abroad experience, and my roommate and now still very dear friend Tamar, she choked on smažený sýr. Oh no. And because it was mozzarella, she literally— and it was like stringy— she had to pull it out of her body. So she's alive and well, married our friend down the hall from that semester. But I want to dedicate this fried food episode to Tamar Glassner-Walsh. So this year, Hanukkah is early, or rather it's not because it's always on the 25th of Kislev, but it's basically Thanksgiving-ica because it's right after Thanksgiving. Before I continue, I want you to know that Microsoft Word/Google Docs autocorrected my spelling of Thanksgiving, and I feel like Jews have finally arrived.

Anachnu Po. Yeah, the last time they filled this book together was 2013. The last time that happened before that was 1888 and 1899, so it was basically historic. But what's interesting about the idea of the history and folklore of Hanukkah is that the story we usually tell about Hanukkah is the story of the Maccabees, which is not in the Torah, reminding us that this is a rabbinic holiday. But there is a lot more to the story that we don't often hear about because it involved— shocker— women.

Ah yes, that sounds familiar. But before we hit the untold stories, let's talk a bit about some critical basics to the story. As Jodi mentioned, the Hanukkah story is unremarked in the Hebrew Bible and barely referenced in the Talmud. Instead, it appears in the Book of Maccabees in the Apocrypha, and we cannot talk about the Apocrypha and Second Temple literature without referencing our teacher Rabbi Aaron Pinken, of blessed memory, a fabulous scholar and noteworthy fabulous foosball player. So the Book of Maccabees was banished from the biblical canon by 3rd-century rabbinic authorities and exiled to the Apocrypha.

So we should pause here to say that the Apocrypha, which takes its name from the Greek meaning "hidden away" or "secret," is actually mostly made up of Jewish writings in Greek—novels, sermons, histories, prophecies. So the original story of Hanukkah, then, is this literary expression of a people that had deeply absorbed the language and the thought and the values of Hellenistic civilization. This makes sense because it's both a story of religious preservation and powerful revolt and assimilation because of the time frame of Hellenism. The latkes come a lot later. And as the story goes, the Maccabees, led by Judah Maccabee, outsmart the Seleucid Greeks to preserve their religious practices and to restore the Temple.

And that's when the whole "oil is miraculous" theme comes into play. Because they go to clean up the destroyed and defiled Temple, and the oil lasts, as you might know, not for one day but for 8 full days. Hello, Hanukkah, which means dedication, because with light each year we rededicate ourselves to Jewish practice and hope.

Chanukkah, oh Chanukkah, come light the menorah. Let's have a party, we'll all dance the hora.

Exactly, we're dancing the hora because there are some other exciting aspects to the Hanukkah story. That, if I'm honest, are way cooler. And that is the story of Judith. Judith's story is written in the Book of Judith, which is codified as the fourth book of the Apocrypha. Although the story is set in the Babylonian period, the Book of Judith is thought to have originated at the time of the Maccabees. Medieval Hebrew versions understood the story in the context of the Hasmonean Revolt. So, Jodi, tell us, what happens in the Judith story?

I love the Judith story, and here I want to shout out our friends at Moving Traditions and their Rosh Chodesh: It's a Girl Thing curriculum, because they have published an incredible paraphrased and excerpted story of Judith that we offer to you now. So basically, there's this woman named Judith. She was a pious widow, and her city was besieged by a king who brought 40,000 warriors, and the Israelites were suffering tremendously. So Judith, being a very smart, pious widow, devised a plan.

Yeah, Judith removes her mourning clothing and instead dresses in beautiful clothing and jewels and goes out to the city gates. "Open the gates!" she says, "for perhaps God will perform a wonder for us." But the guards won't open the gates because they fear she will plot against them. "But heaven forbid!" she proclaims and takes an oath before them.

So they let her in. If Disney had made this into a movie, they would have made it a lot harder to get into the city, including numerous songs to disrupt her efforts. But Judith is exceedingly beautiful, and when the king, Holofernes, sees her, he's intrigued and wants to take her as a wife. And Judith agrees. Oh my gosh.

Well, no, really, OMFG. I love how much agency Judith has. I imagine her singing, "Open the gates and seize the day." So that night they are having an engagement feast, and Holofernes the king has a lot to drink. I would guess some mead, some grog, some fermented hops, maybe some Manischewitz, and who knows what else. And then, because that's a lot of alcohol, he falls asleep.

So when everyone leaves for the night and only Judith and her maidservant remain— well, you might see where this is going— Judith lifts her sword and cuts off the king's head.

And then Judith takes his head with her to the gates of Jerusalem to tell everyone what she had done. At first, no one believed her, but eventually they're like, damn girl, that was serious. And they start yelling the Shema because in their minds their God has prevailed. Adonai, you definitely have Judith to thank.

So I will pause here to say there are many reasons I love the Judah story. Uh, not only because her name in Hebrew is Yehudit, which we'll say something about later, and that's my Hebrew name, but also because as part of her seduction, some people say she also seduced him with salty cheese, which would have made him thirsty, which, because he would have needed to quench his thirst, that's how he gets so drunk. And because of that, Sephardic, Mizrahi, and North African communities observe the 6th or 7th night of Hanukkah which is also Rosh Chodesh, the first night of the new moon of Tevet, as Chag HaBanot. So literally, they call this 6th or 7th night of Hanukkah Chag HaBanot, the Festival of the Daughters, and they celebrate with sweet foods and gift-giving and salty cheese and rejoicing in the power of women in ancient and modern times.

I feel like my version of this celebration is when I go to Trader Joe's and they have the Israeli feta. And it's usually on the top shelf, which I can't reach. But when it's right at the front, I grab it and I rejoice. And it's like, Judith, Judith, you're my traitor Judith, you're my girl. So speaking, maybe that's going to be a new brand for, for, uh, Trader Joe's, like a feminist.

And that's what they'll sell all their like vaguely Jewish food under. Although my friend say that Trader Joe's frozen latkes are excellent. They are good.

They have gluten in them. Whatevs. My friend Jonathan Horowitz has a Trader Joe's idea called Trader Joe Degas, which is a corner store like a bodega, but it's Trader Joe's products. Like a best of, like a greatest hits. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like pesto and salty cheese, basically all you need. So Speaking of Judith, Professor Judith Cates, who is a professor of Jewish Women's Studies at Hebrew College— she's now retired— she talks about the Judith story in this way: Judith, she says, is a story of expectations transformed. The use of a female character as both symbol and literal, literal embodiment of the community of Israel has a long history in Jewish texts by the time of the Book of Judith. But the transformation of that female body from victim to rescuer sends a more radical message. The female body, for centuries the symbol of the community as victim of oppression, becomes the means of rescue. Judith prays that God's power— literally, God's strong hand— manifests itself through a woman's hand. So when she's standing outside holding the enemy's head in her distinctively female hand, she symbolizes a human community which can mold its vulnerability and apparent powerlessness. Femininity becomes a source of strength. Her presence, startling us into awareness of God as God of surprises, brightens the Hanukkah lamp we place in our homes at the meeting point of inside and outside. So that's like a double Judith badass moment. Judith Cates, thank you for your teaching on Judith, the salty cheese and wine. Hero.

So Jen, before we go to our next story, I am wondering what is your preferred and favorite spelling of Hanukkah?

Jodi, are you trying to start a fight? Okay, but really, I prefer the spelling that goes like this: Chet Nun Vav Kof Heh. Rabbi jokes. Anyways, back to righteous women, because there's another woman to celebrate on this occasion, and that is Hannah. Not the Hannah from Rosh Hashanah, but one from the Hellenistic period as well. Antiochus was super focused on destroying Jewish culture by outlawing Torah and did not expect anyone to fight back. Sadly, most Jews who refused to give up their culture, refused to eat pork— bacon lovers, now is not the moment— sadly, those people were tortured or killed. But then came forth Hannah and her 7 sons.

So before we tell the story of Hannah and her 7 sons, let's just say that this story is complicated. Right? It doesn't feel like the easy cheer on the way we just had with Judith, but it's interesting. So the story goes that her first son, Hannah's first son, comes forward to Antiochus and asked, "What do you wish from us? We are ready to die rather than transgress the laws of our fathers." Unsurprisingly, Antiochus tortured that son and simultaneously demanded that her next son worship an idol. That son also refused and was similarly tortured.

So Antiochus continues down the line of Hannah's sons, and each son holds fast to his faithfulness and then, sadly, loses his life, until only Hannah and her youngest son remain. Meanwhile, Antiochus is a bit concerned about how things are going. So much killing is becoming a public relations disaster. So he calls her youngest son forward and begs him to do what he says. "Don't become a martyr," he begs. "Just do what I say and I'll give you more wealth." than you can imagine.

But this child is also not going to listen to Antiochus's pleas, and so he calls forth his mother, Hannah, to intercede. And Hannah supposedly does just that. She takes her son aside and pretends to beg him for his life, but instead she says this: My son, I carried you for 9 months, nourished you for 2 years, and have provided you with everything until now. Look upon the heaven and the earth. God is the creator of it all. Do not fear this tormentor, but be worthy of being with your brothers.

And so, like his brothers, he refuses Antiochus' demands and is also put to death. And in this moment, Hannah prays to God, recalling the story of Abraham agreeing to sacrifice his son Isaac in loyalty to God. And she weeps and she wails and she weeps and she wails. And then Hannah also falls to the floor. And dies brokenhearted.

Oof. The story does not sit so easily. It also doesn't necessarily help us understand why we give our kids gifts for Eight Nights of Hanukkah. There's no festival to celebrate Hannah's piety, but it does help me understand why Hanukkah is about recommitting to the light of Judaism. In our day, not many of us can think of a time when we've been forced to choose between pursuing our religious identities or obeying people who have power over us. Yes, there is a rise of antisemitism, i.e., the modern Antiochus among us, but most of us are physically safe in body. Most of us get to enjoy the festive lights of Christmas while safely lighting our Hanukkah menorahs in our own homes.

I feel like these stories give us a charge, though, which is the power of pirsûm hanês, proclaiming, illuminating the miracle. The word in modern Hebrew, thank you, husband, matan, means advertisement. Literally advertise to your neighbors that you are Jewish by putting your Chanukiah in the window. Only house on the block without Santa lights? You have lights to be proud of. And even more worthy of pride, each day we increase in light, and frankly, your electricity bill isn't really impacted by it.

Yeah, totally. On Hanukkah, which takes place during these darkest days in our year, we increase in light We increase in holiness, and we pray we increase in joy.

There are sadly people today whose lives do look like that of Judith or Hannah. They are required to hide or fight for their religious freedom. In honor of their courage, bring your Hanukkah menorah to your window. Spread the light, the light of courage, justice, and freedom to all your neighbors.

So on this upcoming Hanukkah, and any other holidays you may celebrate this season, We bless you with fried foods, maybe with your air fryer, with joy and festivity, and with gratitude too.

The name Judith, or Yehudit, Jodi's Hebrew name, is also connected to the name of Judah, which shares the root with todah and is the source of the name Judaism, all of which mean thank you, gratitude. So whether you are grateful not to be a turkey on this Thanksgiving Day, or for the freedom to practice your religious or cultural identity in public spaces, As the days become darker and darker, may you increase the joy and light. Don't worry, you can address your sebaceous glands in the new year. Wishing you a happy, bright, and joyful Hanukkah. Chanukkah, oh Chanukkah, come light the menorah. Let's have a party, we'll all dance the hora.

This episode of the OMFG podcast was brought to you by rabbis Jen Gubitz and Jodi Gordon. Editing by Jesse Ulrich. And snark straight from Adonai.