You’re Building Rapport All Wrong (Do This Instead!)
Jeremy Miner teaches salespeople that rapport comes from trust, not likability. He breaks down three practices: use intentional tonality and body language to show empathy, ask unexpected questions that break prospects' mental patterns, and speak in neutral language without assumptions early on.
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Quit the small talk. Because rapport is not built by being liked. It's built by being trusted. There's a big difference, because people do not buy from people they like. People buy from people who they trust can get them the best result. If they like you, that's just a bonus. But they don't buy from you just because they like you only. Now, I'm going to show you three things that you've got to master if you want to be a top 1% salesperson at and build rapport. Okay, number one, most rapport building is actually built by your tonality. So write this down. This is a writer downer. Your tone is how your prospect interprets your intention behind everything you say and everything you ask. Okay, so I'll give you an example. Let's say if you sold life insurance as an example, and the prospect says, oh, you know, I just, you know, I'm looking at life insurance because, you know, my brother died about two months ago. What would most salespeople do in that space? They say something like, oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Now let me ask you. And then they just go into the next question. How much rapport did you build there? Zero. In fact, you've probably lost the deal because they feel like you don't freaking care. But if I just leaned in when they said something like that and I said, oh, what.
What actually happened?
You sound so young. Your brother must have been young.
What actually happened?
Oh, he had this problem. He had this problem. Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Did now, how much. How much life insurance did he leave his wife? Okay, and I'm See that tone. That's a concern tone.
Oh, what actually happened? You.
You sound so young.
What actually happened to him?
Now notice I'm saying that in a concerned tone, a tone that shows empathy. What if I said it like this? Oh, what.
What actually happened?
That tone doesn't do anything. They're like, well, this is kind of private. I, you know, but if I'm like, oh, what.
What actually happened?
Now notice what I did. I put my hand on my chest. That's a body language signal that shows what? That your concern for them. Even if you're selling on the phone. That right there. Right. Your body language affects your tonality. Okay, so right here, you kind of go into like, I'm concerned. So you go into that. Your tone shifts and sometimes you can lean.
Oh, what actually happened?
That's just a little example about how to build rapport. Okay, Remember your tone is how the prospect interprets your intention. Bind everything you say and you ask. So in another example, let's say if I sold some type of SaaS product that automates something for a company, instead of having to manually do it taking up hours at a time that other projects don't get done that make them revenue, I might come in and say, after I found out that they're doing something, I'm like, oh, how. How long have they been forcing you to do it manually for? See how my tone shifts there? How long have they been forcing you to have to do it manually though? Notice it said forcing you. Nobody likes to be forced. But notice how I say it in a concerned tone, a tone that shows empathy. Now, does that mean I'm going to ask every question in a concerned tone? No, it wouldn't make any sense. There's other questions I need to ask more of a curious tone. Oh, how? Walk me through. How do you guys generate new leads and cl Do I understand if I sold for a marketing agency? That's a curious tone. I'm genuinely curious. Okay, the point is, your tone is most of the sale, how you come across, how you ask the questions. Reason number two leads into what I just said. Don't ask predictable questions that every salesperson asks. Okay, so if you ask questions where the prospect knows where that question leads. Like if you're trying to find problems and you say, can you tell me two problems that keep you awake at night? Or can you tell me some challenges you're having or can tell me some issues that's going on? That is such a predictable question. Every salesperson is asking that that sells anything. And because it's such a predictable question, your prospect, do they know where that question probably leads? Yes. And that's why you notice if they're a lay down sale, they open up. If they're not, you notice they kind of give you vague generalized surface level answers. Are you with me? So I got to reframe the questions. Okay, so let's say if I sell for a marketing agency as an example and I find out the prospect already using a different marketing agency, I might say so. And this is not my first question, but probably, I don't know, eight, ten minutes in, I might say so you've already been using XYZ Agency the last five years. I mean, they're fairly decent. I mean, what's caused you to feel like you might want to look at someone else or what's caused you to feel like they're not really going to be able to scale you, if that's what they said they wanted. Okay, notice how I reframed the question, not what are some problems you don't like about the marketing agency? Because they know where that leads. Now I'm getting them to push back and defend themselves on why they don't like the other marketing agency, which of course is what you want. That helps them. I mean, you're already with xyz. You've already been doing this internally the last two years. I mean, what's causing you to feel like your internal people might not be able to really grow the business where you want? Well, we like them, but. And then they start telling you what they don't like, what they want to change. Okay, that's just an example of reframing the question. I'm interrupting the pattern the prospect brain does not understand. And I'm getting them to focus and defend themselves on why they want to change, which is probably what you want, right? Hey, guys, Jeremy Miner here. Look, a lot of you leave comments wanting me to help you somewhere. So the easiest way to get a hold of me, the quickest way is to text me. So text me right now. It's 480-637-2944. So 480-637-2944. Listen, I started this company to help you learn how to close more deals. But do it the right way. Text me right now. Let's get back to the training video. And number three, you've got to use more neutral language, especially in the beginning parts of the conversation. Most salespeople try to assume the sale way too early in the conversation. And because you try to assume it way too early, especially if they're an A type, you're going to notice what they do. I didn't say I was ready to buy yet, but we're still looking around. Oh yeah, John, I just called. I saw your inquiry about, you know, being interested in our XYZ product. Well, I'm just kind of looking at my different options, see how you assume that. But if I simply made it more neutral. John, I got your inquiry. You asked us to give you a call back about possibly looking at ways to grow your business. Right. Possibly looking at ways. Notice possibly is a neutral word. I'm not assumptive there. Now, do I know I can help them? Yes. Does the prospect know I can help them? In the first 30 seconds to a few minutes of a call? No. Or a conversation? No. Okay. Because I don't. How much trust and credibility do I have? Not much. I have to build that, but by building the gap. Okay, so I'm gonna use more neutral language, like what would you possibly be looking for? What would you might want to look at? Or what would you maybe want to go through if I did have time? See, I'm using that. Maybe, possibly. Might be we might be able to help you. We just have to look, you know, we might be able to do something for you, But I need to know a little bit more. I'm neutral. I'm unbiased. Which causes the prospect to let their guard debt. Are you with me? Okay. Now, I know you have questions, so I'm gonna give you my number to text me. 480-637-2944 e. Or one of our sales trainers will respond to you. Give us sometimes one to two business days before we get back to you. You probably have questions about how to do that for your industry, so you're welcome to text me. And what can you do to commit to mastery? First thing you gotta do is you gotta learn more. Because you're smart. Look, you're smart. I know you wouldn't be watching me if you weren't a smart sales pro. And because you're smart, you know that the number one thing that determines how much your company is gonna be forced to pay you is what, your skill level, right? So because it's your skill level, hit the subscribe button and watch these videos. I will help you do that. And look, the only thing you should not do is don't give this channel to your competitors. You do not want them to learn what I'm going to show you here. I can assure you, until the next video hit subscribe button, text us. I'll see you soon.
