In this personal monologue, the speaker recounts a nine‑month period of strict raw veganism and prolonged fasting, describing the initial euphoric, almost psychedelic state of living on fruit alone and the sense of spiritual elevation it brought. Over time, the extreme regimen led to serious health imbalances—amenorrhea, digestive distress, and a weakened ability to process solid foods. The speaker identifies a deeper psychological driver: a compulsive need for control that manifested as an extremist diet, causing shame and fear when publicly renouncing previously vowed‑off foods. Reflecting on the experience, she emphasizes that for women especially, detoxification must be gentle, and re‑introducing foods should be gradual to avoid bloating, fatigue, and further health setbacks. The narrative concludes with a cautionary message discouraging others from pursuing such extreme diets unless medically necessary, and offers practical advice for a balanced, nourishing approach.
Chapters
It was a big journey, and that 2 months then turned into 9 months of being a raw vegan, actually. So it was a really beautiful journey that I'm so grateful that I had the time to have, because when you eat nothing but fruit, you can't really fit into the normal world. So luckily I wasn't working because you're so kind of in your upper chakras, so to speak. You're almost flying. Like a fairy. I would sit outside in the garden for hours just looking at the nature, and I just felt like I was the nature. You know, for people that have used psychedelics, it's kind of like a permanent psychedelic experience. So it was a beautiful journey. However, I went too far, if I'm honest with you, and I wouldn't recommend this for anyone now. To go that deep unless you were critically ill. So what happens when you do extended fasts, especially as a woman, is you can throw your body out of balance. So it's very important to detox in gentle ways unless you have a life-threatening illness, which back then I thought I had a life-threatening illness, but I didn't at all. Um, it was just my fears that were arising. I have to detox. Really intensely. And, and that's the same energy that we come from. You know, the world is like, I have to fix this. There's something wrong with me. I need to find out what's wrong and I'm going to do everything. And I was an extremist. You know, once I ate nothing but bananas for a month. So I used to try every single different diet because I was determined to learn and I was determined to fix myself. But trying to fix myself, I honestly made myself worse, which then I stopped getting my period and I threw my body out of balance. And I share this with you because a lot of people ask me about my journey and, oh my gosh, you, you were the fruit girl and you did this. And that's true. But I have to share with you my journey now and what I've learned and that for women, gentle, gentle, gentle, gentle is best. Very important. Well, I can tell you that when you go into such a strict, controlled way of eating, that there's a lot of shame in changing that, especially when you've shared it online, especially when you've said, I'll never eat this again, I'll never eat that again, you know, I'll never touch that. To start doing that, the body is also afraid And there's a lot of fear. And I noticed this with people that are attracted to this path. They all have a similar energy of control and needing to control everything. Some people, it manifests in an eating disorder where they don't eat anything. Other people, it's strict diets. And I can tell you, that's where I was. So the journey of unraveling that and going into a way of being like, I need to start eating food because Because this is hurting me, was a deep letting go, a deep kind of a part of me had to die, which took time and very slow because a lot of these foods, my body didn't know how to digest them anymore. So I slowly introduced things again, but at first I would get sick and I'd get bloated and tired. So that's the kind of hard part if you detox too long, that it will be difficult to eat foods again.
