About My Dream Home & Behind The Scenes [Client Question]

Welcome to Million Dollar Grit, the podcast that dives deep into the world of entrepreneurship, where tenacity meets strategy and dreams meet reality. My name is Julie, and I explore the raw, often overlooked truths of what it takes to succeed in business and in life. It's not just about the glossy success stories, it's about the grit it takes to get there. Hey everyone, this is Julie. I'm back with another episode of Million Dollar Grit. Today I'm answering one of my private clients' questions that she texted me, and I asked her if it was cool if I went ahead and answered it in podcast form because I think that this will be really helpful for a lot of aspiring wealth builders out there. So this is what she asked me. She said, "Can I ask you some personal questions? When did you buy the home and land that you are on now? Would you actually consider it your dream home? And what stage of success in business was your life when you decided to purchase?" What was it like 5 years prior to that, and how did you make the transition from a picture I've seen you share with your little kids with the Dave Ramsey envelopes to being at a place in life where you made an offer on a slice of heaven? Did you, with the little kids in that envelope, think you were capable of being where you are today in terms of financial freedom? Did you dream of it and think it could be a reality for you, or think that that was a life you would never know? So there are a lot of questions, and I'm going to try to answer them as best I can. The short sort of where we are today snapshot is that in 2021, I purchased a beautiful farmhouse in Connecticut on 15 acres, about a mile from the ocean. So for all intents and purposes, it is a dream home in terms of the size, the location, the property, It was a very expensive house for me. I did not think that I was gonna purchase a home this expensive. It was a $2 million home. And so that meant that I had to put down about $500,000 in cash if I wanted a 20% deposit so that I could avoid PMI, which is primary mortgage insurance. So it was a big stretch. I did have the cash. And when I was originally looking for a home in Guilford, 'cause it's a beautiful town, always makes the, you know, the top 30 towns in America list because of how gorgeous it is. It was my hometown growing up. It's always been somewhere where I've wanted to live. So that is something that I've had in me forever, in part because I grew up in Guilford. And when I got married and I left, I couldn't afford Guilford. And so I spent, you know, basically 20 years living close to Guilford but not in Guilford. So The town was always a dream, but I didn't have any idea that I was going to purchase a home of this size. So the actual process of finding a home was kind of interesting. We were living in Cheshire at the time, which is a great little town, but it's not close to the water. It was at that tail end of COVID and all of my children were being homeschooled or in remote schooling due to the pandemic. So it felt like there was an opportunity I had that if I was going to make a move, this was the moment because they were already sort of detached from their schools. And I was sensitive to the transition, but I knew that they were gonna finish out, you know, the 2020, 2021 school year at home, and then they could start fresh in a new town. So that was sort of the impetus. I think also subconsciously, I was looking to go back to my hometown because I was feeling really unsteady and uncertain in my marriage and in my life. And I think just subconsciously, I felt like that was a safer place for me to be. And so when we started looking in Guilford, I had in my head a budget of $1 million because I had $500,000 saved up and I thought this would be great. I'll get a $500,000 mortgage. I'll put down $500,000. It'll be, you know, not too expensive of a mortgage because I've put 50% down and everything will be great. And I looked at a bunch of houses and there were houses that looked nice. But when I went to go get preapproval for the mortgage, the mortgage lender or whoever that is that does that came back and said, you are approved for $4 million house. And for me, I think that was a moment where I realized what my earning potential had actually done. So I don't think I really recognized just how much wealth I had built until someone else came and shared it with me. And this is a common pattern. As I've been working on my personal story in book form, I recognize that I don't seem to realize when I've arrived somewhere because I'm so busy looking at what is still missing, right? This is a pretty common problem with entrepreneurs. There's stuff missing, and so they look at that stuff and then they don't stop and acknowledge where they have arrived. And so I think that was what was happening with the house. I I knew that I was able to afford a million-dollar house, and I thought, wow, you know, I was already so amazed and impressed with the fact that I had done that, but I didn't see much past that until he said, no, you, the banks will give you a $4 million loan. And I thought, well, that's crazy. Why would you do such a thing? And, but it was outside perspective that opened my eyes One of the reasons why I think that having a coach, having mentors, being in communities where people are ahead of you is so valuable, because you don't start laying the groundwork for a path unless someone shows you that the path is possible. And it's really hard for us to see the path that's possible. Now, some of us naturally have that, but many of us can't see it. I know for myself, I can't see it. And so that changed how I started looking for a home. And now I started to branch out. I did not want a $4 million home. I did the math on the mortgage. I thought, that is crazy. I didn't have enough cash to put down for 20%. So it was enough to give me belief, but it wasn't enough to have me take what I would consider irresponsible action. I thought it was quite irresponsible of the banks to tell me that I was capable of borrowing $4 million. So this house, the one that I'm in now, I saw and it was listed at 2.2 or something like that, or maybe 1.9, I can't remember. And I said, you know, I'm gonna go look because I loved how close it was to the beach. It had a lot of acreage. And I remember Alex, who I was married to at the time, was like, what are you gonna do with all that land? And I was like, well, I'm not really looking for the land. I'm just looking 'cause it looks like a beautiful house. And so, When we drove up to see the house, I remember a sense of, oh my gosh, you know, just that feeling that comes over you. And it was quiet and there was land. And I went upstairs into the master bedroom and I, I went out onto the balcony and I looked over and there was just that, that feeling that I had that was really intense. But I was very, very scared to do it. Like, because it was double what I had been looking at. So I, we went through the house and I talked to the realtor. I brought my parents over to see it. I brought my uncle over to see, you know, I brought all these people over to see it. And so we decided to go ahead and put an offer in. And I wrote a personal letter to the owners and they immediately countered. We countered back and then they accepted our offer and they, told me later that my letter was the pivotal reason why they accepted my offer, and they actually countered $25,000 lower because of my letter. So I should find that letter and sell it as like a, you know, use this letter if you want to get $25,000 less for the home you're looking for. Anyway, that really was sort of the pathway, and I was afraid, but I felt this sort of small voice, which I think now was probably God's voice in me saying— because it was hard for me to admit that I could have something like this. But when I saw the land and I heard the story that the owners of the home had purchased the land, it didn't have a home on it, it was just land, it was just woods, it was going to become housing, like cluster B housing, and they bought it to preserve the forest, and they but they kept it as forest, and then they finally built a home on it. So I just felt a sense of like, Julie, steward the land, like take care of the land. And so that gave me a reason to like step over my fear and say yes. I think if it was just this idea of like a big home and, you know, my dream house, I don't know that I would've had like the gumption to be like, yeah, let me buy it. but that voice of like, take care of the land, take care of the animals, take care of the property. It's my land. Like if you can imagine God kind of like dropping that nugget in my heart, that was when I all of a sudden had a burst of courage. I was like, let's do it. So that is sort of the story of how the home came to be. I absolutely do consider it my dream home. I think that there were multiple times over the next couple of years where I would doubt my decision significantly. There were, well, first when my husband of the time and I got divorced, I felt a strong sense of overwhelm that this property was now mine to take care of. And I was alone. My dad stepped in and helped. I hired landscapers to help. It was a very expensive endeavor. I was spending, you know, $4,000 a month plus to have people help me care for the home. 'Cause I felt really strongly that it needed to be stewarded well. And then I think I started to regret it again, maybe at the end of 2022, 2023, because there was a lot of money going out the door and business was getting harder, and I started to have that fear. What if I can't manage this? What if this was a stupid decision? What if I need to be selling this house and hunkering down? And that lasted for a long time, and You know, in the meantime, I got divorced. I met AC, who is my husband now. He took over all of the outside, and as we've kind of settled in, I don't have those doubts anymore about the house. I think fear is kind of sneaky because number one, I'm remembering the voice that I heard, which was "steward of the land," and number two, I'm watching it happen in my life right now. I think that, you know, AC and I as a couple, we have a lot of shared values around nature, around animals, and so he has taken it upon himself to, you know, build out the gardens and watch, you know, take care of all the property, and I am watching the property come to life in a way that I was not able to do on my own, and I wasn't able to do in my old relationship and marriage. So I think it was one of those things where I had to trust that what I was hearing was right, but there was a delay in the fulfillment. I mean, it's 2025 and it's been 4 years that I've been in the house and now I'm just starting to see. And I, you know, despite the fact that my escrow and my is never enough and my taxes are never enough and my home insurance is going up, I think my mortgage has gone up Uh, you know, my payment has gone up over $2,000 in the last 2 years, so it's— this is an expensive home. Like, don't, don't, don't mistake what I'm saying, but I still feel a strong sort of sense that this home is something that God has given me. And I've used this home to host events and have people here. I also, for the past 2 years, have been using the downstairs part of my house to host ACs brother and sister-in-law who are currently immigrating to the United States, and I've been able to share that because of this home, right? And so now the next phase of this is gardening and chickens and eggs, and maybe we will be able to put a little farm stand at the end of our driveway and gift our neighbors with food. And so I just keep leaning into what I heard because I believe that was God. And sometimes it's hard to know what is just like a newfangled idea versus what is something that you should pay attention to. And I always ask myself this question: is this a natural thing I would think? And so for my personality, the answer is no. I don't naturally think bigger. I don't naturally think risk. I naturally think smaller, and conservative. So when I get nudges or intuitions that push me out of that comfort zone, I tend to pay attention because I think, you know, that's not really me. So I realize that this can be kind of— if you're listening to this and you're not that person, you're the person who has no trouble thinking big, you have no trouble having vision, it's going to be a little harder for you to discern, is this just a good idea or is this something that's actually like my intuition, or God, depending on how you believe, like, is that pushing me? And so I don't really know how to answer that question. I think having a coach or a mentor that can like, um, help like weigh that out and sift that idea out, I think, um, that's probably the best you can do. And also intuition-wise, like energetically, when you get something like that, if it creates a sense of nervousness or agitation or urgency, like a sense of like, I gotta do this right, right this second, I don't tend to associate those feelings with God or my intuition. When I feel a sense of groundedness, when I feel a sense of peace, when I feel a sense of like, yes, that's what I should do, that's more when I'm paying attention. So that, that may help or not. Okay, so I wanted to go to the question that she said, "What stage of success in business was your life when you decided to do this?" And I think that's a great question because what do you need to be making financially in order to really afford a dream home? I would say in 2017 when I purchased my home in Cheshire, I had made $1 million and I purchased a $350,000 home. So just 30% basically of my revenue was what I had spent. So if we fast forward to 2021, in those years, '18, '19, '20, and '21, I made significantly more than $1 million in top line revenue. I'm not talking about income, right? But my business was making $2 million, $3 million, $4 million. You know, it was big numbers. And so my income was growing significantly to the point where I was taking home approaching $1 million. Like, that was my actual income. And so that was like a big climb. And the entire 4 years that that was climbing, I wasn't spending. I was in a smaller home. COVID was happening. Aside from, I mean, yeah, I'm trying to think, did I make any big purchases? I guess I did purchase Club 33 with Disney. So that was big. But then we didn't go to Disney because of COVID So I didn't, I was saving a lot of money in those years, like significant amounts of money. So by the time 2021 came around and this home appeared, I had $500,000 in cash to put down. And that wasn't all of my cash. Like it wouldn't have made me cash poor. And thank goodness because moving into a new home is so expensive. I don't know if you've done it recently, but the amount of money that I had to spend to actually move, and then the furniture— I didn't have furniture for a 5,000-square-foot house. I had furniture for a 2,000-square-foot house. So it was almost $100,000 by the time I was done in just furniture and moving costs and inspection. It's just like all of those things, you know, that come up. So I had plenty of money, and I knew that the expenses would be higher, but then actually living it out, like I said, I had several years of doubt, especially as business started to get harder in 2022, 2023. I had a huge financial loss with the divorce. I thought, man, I don't know if I can do this. This might be silly, you know, this is foolish because I was having to pay so much. So The question that she asked about how did you make the transition from the picture of the little kids with the Dave Ramsey envelope to being at a place where you could make an offer, that's a big jump, right? I think the picture she's referring to, I've used in a couple of webinar presentations, and I would say that was probably around, you know, 2009, 2010, and it's now 15 years later. So there was a big jump, you know, and that would probably take too long to explain in a podcast, though I hope that my, my story and my book will explain it. But the version of Julie that was sitting there with the Dave Ramsey envelopes and the children had no idea that she was capable of this. Like, I— zero. It was not on my radar. It was not something I imagined for myself. It was so far out of the realm of possibility for me. Just to give you an idea, when I was growing up, because I grew up in Guilford, we were definitely on the lower end financially. So our homes were always small and modest, but all of my friends had these big, we called them the McMansions, right? These beautiful cul-de-sacs and these big houses and these lawns. And I would go over to these people's houses and I would think to myself, my goodness, What do you do in life that you can have a house this big? And I remember I had a boyfriend at the time, he had a huge house. He had the big room over the garage, and I was just in awe. And so that was always my final vision of like, if you were going to make it in life, you were going to be on one of those McMansions in a cul-de-sac. And the Julie that had the Dave Ramsey envelopes and the children, knew about these McMansions, but even that was nowhere in her radar. Nowhere. And the funny thing is, those homes that I'm discussing, like that I'm talking about right now, if I go on Zillow or wherever and I look them up 4 years ago, those homes— I mean, they're more now, but they were running about $600,000 to $700,000 a year. A really nice one, maybe $800,000 a year. So that was my ultimate vision for myself based on my childhood. And I did not ever see myself reaching that. And you want to know what's crazy is that my— even my instinct sometimes, it's not anymore, but several years ago when I would drive by homes in Guilford, I would look at those houses and I would be like, man, they must be so wealthy. And I'd be looking at a house that's a $700,000 house on, you know, a nice little half an acre, well-manicured plot. And I have that thought, and then I think to myself, Julie, what are you talking about? Because I'm living in a $2 million home on 15 acres a mile from the beach. Like, and I think that just goes to show that, like, it's really hard to dislodge beliefs that you you get as a child, because I'm still looking at them going, wow, they made it, not able to acknowledge that I didn't just make that, but I ended up double, triple what I thought was possible. You know, it's just— what— it's just wild to me. You know, we've had multiple offers on this land. I've had an investor reach out and ask about the land, and I've had a personal note from a resident around the area asking if we would partition a piece of the land. So it's very obvious there's no land that has this much acreage this close to the water in this town. So it's a very highly valuable piece of land. So it's just funny that I still even struggle to see it today. So I did not dream of it. I did not understand it. And I guess that's proof that you don't need to have the dream in order for you to walk towards something, right? You just need some immediate next step. It doesn't have to be the be-all end-all dream. And but you do need other people to be able to speak into your life and to show you it's possible if you're someone like me who can't visualize it. Because if it wasn't for all the different people along the way. And I just mentioned the mortgage broker who offered me the $4 million loan, but there were other people who kind of like opened my eyes. But to think that it was that conversation with him that even got me to look at this house, I would never have looked at this house had it not been that conversation. Just goes to show the power of who you talk to and the power of who you listen to. And yeah, so this is getting super long, so I'm going to wrap it up. But I hope that this helps. I hope this gives you some sort of insight in my story. I normally draw lessons and takeaways, but I didn't really today. But if you enjoyed it and it was helpful, please let me know. Hit me up on Instagram. I'll talk to you soon. And there you have it, folks, another dose of Million Dollar Grit. I hope today's episode has left you feeling inspired, equipped, and ready to face your own entrepreneurial journey with resolve. Remember, until Till next time, embrace the struggle, harness your grit, and keep pushing forward. You're stronger than any challenge you face. I'm Julie, and this has been Million Dollar Grit.