300: Celebrating 300 Episodes of Finding Brave

If you're in a whole chapter of growth and challenge. Even within that, it is possible to stop for two minutes and watch a cloud go over, or listen to a bird sing, or see a smile from a stranger, or take a few deep breaths and realize your own beauty. So choosing happiness isn't denying sadness and anger and challenges. It's it's saying, okay, I have all of that, but I am not going to give any more power to that than is absolutely necessary.

Hello everyone, this is Kathy Caprino and welcome to my podcast, Finding Brave. I've created this show for everyone who longs to create something bold and brave in their life. To rise up, speak up, and stand up for who they are and to reach their highest and biggest visions. Each week I'll be speaking with inspiring guests from all walks of business, leadership, entertainment, the creative arts and the entrepreneurial world. And they'll be sharing their intimate stories of Finding Brave and offer their best strategies for building your most rewarding, joyful and meaningful life, business and career. Hey friends. Kathy here and I'm so happy to share an exciting milestone today. My Finding Brave podcast celebrates its 300th episode.

Woohoo.

This podcast journey since we launched in 2018 has been nothing short of incredible for me and I'm so very grateful for all your help in making this journey so meaningful and enjoyable. I'm honored too that with over 574,000 downloads, the show is ranked in the top 100 Apple career podcasts and in the top 1.5% of over 3.5 million podcasts globally. It's also an award winning program featured on several important podcast lists. I couldn't be prouder of these achievements and I owe it all to two incredible groups of people. Number one, the deeply inspiring guests who've generously shared their wisdom and teachings. And number two, you, the amazing finding brave supporters, listeners, reviewers and YouTube viewers who've made this podcast a trusted recipe resource for personal and professional growth. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your support. To celebrate 300 episodes, I've created a special show today featuring 15 of the most powerful and impactful quotes from selected episodes. Moments that really moved me forward personally as well as our listeners. All my guests on this show have shared such important content and I'm grateful to each and every one of them. I hope you enjoy this special show. Thank you for being part of this wonderful Finding Brave community. It means the world. Enjoy Episode number 44 Gay Hendrix how to Live in youn Zone of Genius.

The important commitment starts with yourself Inside. So step number one is make a commitment to your genius. However that shows up. Step number two is make that practical in a very limited way to start, and we start around here with giving people a 10 minute assignment just for 10 minutes a day to devote to their genius. And Everybody can find 10 minutes. Many people spend 10 minutes a day just looking through channels. And so, you know, finding 10 minutes isn't that hard. And we actually have them put it in their calendar. And so, because it needs to be treated with respect, because your genius will show up to the extent that you woo it. I say woo in the book because it's like wooing a lover or wooing forth. You know, imagine sitting in the park and inviting a pigeon to come over and eat out of your hand. It's about that. Effortless, you know, you don't want to chase the pigeon around the park because that will freak out the pigeon. Same thing with creativity. You don't want to chase your creativity and get, get desperate about it because that will chase it away. Fear doesn't drive creativity. A lot of times fear drives our resistance to our creativity.

Episode number 91, Richie Norton. How to bake your dream life into your business model from day one.

It starts with a better question. I had a mentor that say, ask a better question, get a better answer. So most people have either or thinking, right? They're like, if I do this, then I have to do this. Dang it.

Right?

First of all, if you think that way, then it actually is that way.

Right?

Doesn't really have to be that way. It's just because you thought of it that way. So the better question would be, for example, for you, like, how can I reach a million people without having to do this thing? Then even if you don't know the answer yet, the mind over time solves the puzzle.

Yeah.

Or people start talking and you make it relevant to you and your mission and your project and all of a sudden it happens. So like, if I myself say, how do I make a million dollars? I could easily say, I'm gonna go start a McDonald's franchise and I'm gonna be in their everyday hustling, make a million dollars. But if I say I want a million dollars, but I want to travel with my family full time, then I'm gonna see I need to make a business that allows that to happen, in.

Other words, and I've got to heal the wounds that keep me from actually making that.

Like, right? There's software in your head, there's hardware in the body, strategies in the head tactics are in the hand. You know what I mean? Like, this is how it happens. I'm totally with you. But other words, you can instantly, you can. And I'm not saying this metaphorically or figuratively, you can literally have that far distant dream that you thought you wanted in the future that would take all these steps to do.

Episode 157Cheryl Porter Number one vocal coach on how to pivot your creative business and soar.

Because when you found. When you find your voice, you find your voice. When you find that voice, you find the voice. It's not just the singing voice, but it's your inner voice. And I love to see women, and I love to see people of all ages, but especially women, to find that voice to speak up and say, this is not how loud I can sing. This is how loud I can be. This is my power. My voice is my power. This is my strength. So when you find that singing voice, you find so much more, Kathleen. And I know you know what I'm talking about and that is what I teach. I teach the voice, I teach the spirit, and I most definitely teach the vocal technique. But you cannot get to that technique until you get down to the Nitty degritty and say, are you going to show up because I'm here? Because if you're not gonna show up, I'm not gonna show up. But you're gonna have to show up 100% or you save your money, save your time, and I'll see you when you're ready.

Episode number 172Mark Greene Healthy Masculinity and the Battle Against Man Box Culture we.

Wrongly gender them as masculine. So if you take this full range of human capacities, leadership, compassion, empathy, caregiving, strength, tenacity. If we taught all of our children the full range of what it means to be human, then there wouldn't be this false gender binary around what a man is and what a woman is in terms of the business context or communities or politics or education or anything. Instead, we take our children and we take half of their human capacities away from half of the connection and relationship capacities from boys, half of the leadership strength away from girls.

Episode 185 Christian Bush how to create good luck and expand your opportunities and influence.

That's what I find most interesting about serendipity. That if we see serendipity as smart luck, as something where we have to see something in the moment and then connect the dots. It's about productivity towards a random event versus blind luck is being born into A good family or something. It's the things we can't pick, right? It's passive. It's purely passive. And I think in the blind like situation, there's a lot of societal inequality, right? In terms of the ways I sit here in the West Village in New York, I have access to education, to networks. To me the potential level of serendipity is much higher than 2 Marlon in the Cape Flats, in Cape Town, where he doesn't have that. And so we have very different starting positions. And I think at the same time as we work on mindset, of course we have to work also on those societal inequalities. And to your point, what I found really fascinating is the question of for that smart luck, what is it about that smart luck? How can we build a muscle for that? And so, you know, broadly, I feel it's in two domains. The one is really what is the deeper psychological layers here around self limiting beliefs, right? If in the coffee shop, for example, you don't talk with that person because you think I'm not worthy, I'm not ready, I'm not xyz, or you sit in a meeting and you hold back your idea that just popped up because you're like, oh no, it's not mature yet. And so, and so, and then you walk outside and you think I should have talked about it, but I didn't. I'm a big fan of really doing a serendipity journal and saying what are the things that hold me back from acting on something even if I see it in the moment? And what is the pattern behind this, right? Is it xyz? And then really figuring this out and then working on this deeper psychological question.

Episode number 186, Joseph Grenny. How to have difficult but crucial conversations with friends and colleagues.

So there's some sort of perceived threat and usually we amplify it so we make this some psychic battle when in fact it's just a difference of opinion. So even if you were hardcore anti vaxxer and I was a hardcore pro vaxxer, even if there were, that, let's face it, how this conversation goes is not going to cost me my life or you your life, in the immediate circumstances you might have beliefs about how things get carried out, but it's not however our brain treats it like that. It treats it as though the fact that you're calling me some insane lunatic because I'm willing to inject my six year old child with this vaccine that that has some real significant psychic threat to me and it doesn't. So there's huge opportunity for us to de escalate our own emotions if we recognize that this is just perceived threat, not real threat. So one way we do that, one of the skills we found from observing people who are really good in these moments is a skill called start with heart. And start with heart essentially means learning to notice when your motives are off track. When under threat, our motives become short term. It's about things like saving face, about being right, about winning, about punishing. It's all about dealing with immediate emotional thoughts, threat, and so understanding that. What we found from those who can talk themselves off that ledge is they tend to use a really potent therapeutic intervention of a single sentence. They just ask themselves the question, what do I really want?

Episode number 188 Bronnie Ware the top regrets of the dying.

We have to realize we're allowed to be happy and that we're worthy of happiness. That's a really big thing for a lot of. But also understanding that contrast is a part of life. We're not going to be happy all the time. We can't realize our potential without the challenges and the struggle to realize our strength and to break through all of the conditioning that's actually holding us back and to break through the resistance to our potential, the fear of our potential. And so we have to have those struggles and the contrast and the challenges because we, they are the things that make us step into our best self to really step up and own who we can be. So it's not about not being, not accepting those times. It is about choosing how long you're going to stay in those times. And so even within, if you're in a whole chapter of growth and challenge, even within that, it is possible to stop for two minutes and watch a cloud go over or listen to a bird sing, or see a smile from a stranger, or take a few deep breaths and realize your own beauty. So choosing happiness isn't denying sadness and anger and challenges. It's saying, okay, I have all of that, but I am not going to give any more power to that than is absolutely necessary.

Episode number 205 Katherine Morgan how to build financial well being into the heart of your life and work.

It's like holding a mirror up to how we feel about money as a reflection on how we feel about ourselves. So we give a lot of our power away by defining our sense of self worth directly to money. And yet when you think about it, money is just a thing. It's a tool, it's something that the economy can print more of when it needs to. You know, it's quantitative, easy, it will print more money when it needs more of it. But yet we seem to give a lot of our power away. A lot of our confidence, a lot of our control. You know, we say things like I need to be in control of money. Well, we don't really want to be in control of anything, like in control of money. Because having control over something is quite masculine, it's quite powerful. You know, it's not actually a good relationship to have with anything or anybody. And the relationship we have with money is probably the longest relationship we have in our entire lives. And yet we don't treat it very well. So I think wellbeing is going back to we've got to separate our sense of self away from Money.

Episode number 212. Nate Sinser. How confidence is key and how you can get it and keep it.

These are the seven deadly sins. Remember your failures and mistakes because those memories motivate you to improve. Deadly sin number two, Always be your own harshest critic who wasn't encouraged to take oneself seriously in the pursuit of their personal success. You know, deadly sin number three goes right along with it. Always be logical and think carefully about what you're doing. Okay? Now a certain degree of self awareness is crucial. But to be locked into logic, if this, then that, if this, then that, that can be tremendously self limiting. Here's deadly sin number four. Always be on the lookout for more knowledge and more information and more practice opportunities. The idea that you can never have enough. If there's one thing that's important for confidence at the moment of truth, it's your willingness to look at what you have in your tank, in your reservoir, in your, as I put it, mental bank account and say, okay, I'm enough. I may not be complete, I'm still a work in progress, but right now I'm enough. As opposed to constantly thinking, oh, I wish I had more, oh, I wish I had more. I wish I had studied this, et cetera, et cetera.

Oh my gosh, that one brings tears to my eyes. So obviously I needed to hear that one.

Okay, well, we got a solution for that one.

Okay, good, keep going.

Here, here's deadly sin number five. You better be really good at something before you become confident about it.

Oh boy.

Number six. Worship the gods. The experts know what's best and the winners have earned your respect, you know, and that always puts you in a place of, you know, second best. Wow, I've always gotten the kick out of the phrase, if you have a hero, the best you can ever be is second place. And a lot of people put themselves.

What a downer of a statement. Yeah, but why try if I'm always just going to be looking at. Up at, you know, from the feet of the hero.

That's right. Okay, but you think about how powerful a message that often is. And here's number seven. Above all else, thou shalt not screw up. Also known as the team or the individual that makes the fewest mistakes wins.

Episode number 229, Bruce Gelfand how writing your Story Transforms yous Life.

It's a miracle what happens when people are invited into a safe space and invited to speak their heart, speak their mind, and there's no wrong way to do it. You just drop onto the page and you go. And what happens in those hours? I mean, it's very interesting. I'm always bugging people I work with about writing in present tense because I believe in present tense. I believe that the more we write in present tense, the more we live in present tense, the more present and the less tense we are. So there is something about writing in present tense, in the moment, in a group, that creates a kind of timeless zone around the work. And writing in present tense, to me, is the way of getting to the zone, waiting to getting to timeless. And as any writer knows, it's when you disappear onto the page or onto the computer screen and you look up and it's five hours later and you don't know how it happened that all that time went away. But Here you have 20 pages worth of manuscript, whatever. I mean, that's what we're all looking for. We're looking for that zone where one disappears and this other thing comes through that's sort of bigger and smarter and wiser than you are, you know, and one becomes kind of an instrument. This is why talking about past lives, I mean, when we started working with you and your story and you wanted to sort of go back into these other lives or go forward into these other lives. It's very useful because there is something timeless about the act of writing. It's also something that's completely original. You're not in therapy often. In bad therapy, I would say you're always recycling the same story, and you're just. You're like rearranging the chairs on the Titanic. You know, it's all the same box you're living in. The great thing about a blank page and a blank computer screen is it compels something brand New, completely original from you.

Episode number 252, Andre Solo. Being highly sensitive is a superpower. Embrace and leverage it.

When we hear the word sensitive, I think a lot of us think fragile, weak, or maybe someone who overreacts. And that is just not what sensitive means as a personality trait. Being sensitive means that you take in more information from the environment around you and you do more with it, right? So sensitive people are actually wired at a brain level to process all information more deeply. And that allows us to notice things that others miss and to make connections and find kind of new ideas that others might not make. And interestingly, so the information that the brain takes in, that includes sensory information, right? A sensitive person can notice the texture of a fabric or those subtle hints of apricot and a nice white wine. But information is also emotional, and that's oftentimes the most important information we have in our environment. So sensitive people are also better at noticing that little hint of a smile that flashed across someone's face just before they managed to hide it, which can be a really powerful thing to have that kind of radar. So tend to be both more physically and more emotionally sensitive. And those two things are so closely related that in studies we found that if you take a Tylenol to numb your physical pain, you'll actually score lower on an empathy test until that Tylenol wears off.

Episode number 256, Rob, how bringing your heart and spirit forward transforms lives.

Think, Kathy, of those moments, those times and seasons where in the depths of who you are, you don't have adequate words to describe how you feel. Some may call deep calls to deep. Some may call it your heart of hearts. There's different terms for it. But I really find in the deepest place of who we are, that's the spiritual place.

Can it also be the knowingness that you have that you have no business knowing? Like, absolutely. I know this is going badly. I know this person is hurting. I know. But it's not coming through your senses. It's coming through a knowingness.

Is it that knowing this, that intuition, Right. The intuitive nature of each one of us. And some could be listening. And like Rob, I'm not terribly intuitive person. This is kind of a foreign concept for me. I think people are a little bit more intuitive than they may even realize. And I think we can point to certain aspects and times in our life where, whether it was conscious or unconscious at the time, right. That there was a deep conviction of the heart, something deep within us that started to well up and we kind of went with our gut. A feeling that overtook us, for lack of a better term. And it just compelled us to act, to be kind to someone, to do something that Emmanuel or a book, you know, could never even scratch the surface to really telling it. But we just felt in that time we needed to do this. I don't know why exactly. I don't have all the answers, but I felt compelled to do it. That's a very spiritual place.

Episode number 271David Jurassic how to recognize and release the damaging shame you have hold. Let me ask you this. When you ask people in therapy or if you were to ask your friend, can you name the shame, do you know where it came from? Do most people immediately know?

No. They don't even know they have any shame.

Right, Right.

It's like they have the poison, but they talk about the symptoms. I doubt myself. I'm indecisive. I feel like an imposter. When they say should I should, I shouldn't. There's so many ways that it shows up that I just. It comes up like within a minute of talking to somebody new, I go, oh, there's a shame right there. Okay. And it's identifies in very unique ways, like, oh, this person is ashamed about their money situation. This person is ashamed about their physique. But it's the same beast. It's just for them. It's attached to that little label. Right. That's so painful. But it's so easy to notice once you smell it. It's like opening a fridge and smelling something's off. You go, oh, there, that cheese has gone moldy. Oh, gross. Let's get it out of there. It's that obvious once you start to notice it. It's just so common that we don't notice it.

Episode number 286, Finney and Kelly. Intentionality. How it heals and positively shifts our life experience.

I define intentionality as identifying the feelings you want to feel and taking incremental steps to making that a reality. So it's that combination of choice. But the key thing is, is you're choosing the feeling. And the feelings are more important than anything else because that's right now that's all we have. We're set of feelings and often we go, oh, yeah, I'm going to go on that career path or I'm going to do this workout because you hope it gives you a feeling. So we need to flip it and decide the feelings. And now feelings don't just happen by themselves. Like they're a byproduct. They're a byproduct of our subconscious beliefs. And we can override our subconscious beliefs with conscious intention and go, well, okay, what are the behaviors in my present moment? Because that's all we have is in the present moment, which are likely to lead me to have more of those feelings. So if I want to feel peace and love and joy, when I feel that tension coming up because I'm in a little bit of conflict and I know that pattern where I'm going to yell at someone or be unkind to my partner, I reflect and go, oh, that doesn't generally lead to me to feeling much peace and love and joy. So instead, I may do some form of other behavior. And then through that behavior, you result in a feeling. And then after enough of those feelings, the subconscious goes, oh, they want more of these feelings. I'm going to create a program which makes that feeling. And then now your life just happens on autopilot, because that's what the subconscious does. So it's this relationship between the conscious mind and the subconscious mind and then the universal mind, which is just this one energetic source where everything comes from. And that's what really intentionality is about, is about how do we get alignment with our minds. So we're just one, and there's no conflict.

Episode number 294, Seth Godin. This is strategy. Think bigger, act bolder, and make your impact.

Every superhero has an origin story. Superman left Krypton. Spider man got bit by a radioactive spider. Yeah, I could go on and on. Yes, lots of things happen to superheroes, but only one of them becomes their origin story because they keep repeating it to themselves. And this is the key. What story do you tell yourself about who you are based on what happened to you a long time ago? So if you had the misfortune of growing up surrounded by bullies or in an abusive household, when something triggers that, you're saying, here we go again, because that's the story. But your sibling, who may have grown up in the same home, may be rehearsing a different story. So the story I rehearsed for a long time about my childhood was I was the clever kid who saw things differently than other people from a very young age. But I also did lots of things just like everybody else, but I didn't rehearse that story. So I think we have the chance to change the story we're rehearsing and not focus on the thing that's not getting us what we want. But focusing on a different origin story that could help us get what we want.

Hey everyone, Kathy here I am thrilled to announce that my eight week live course, the Most Powerful you is now open for early enrollment. We kick off the course on February 27th and if you register by February 24th first you'll save $300 on the full price and receive nine incredible bonuses including free access to my brand new digital career coaching tool. Kathy Cabrino, AI this transformational course is the perfect companion to my book the most powerful you7 bravery boosting paths to career bliss and over eight weeks together, I'll personally guide you through steps to boost your confidence, step into your leadership power, build effective networks and allies, speak up for what you want and get it. Share your talents in compelling ways and make the career changes and pivots you've been dreaming of. By closing the seven damaging power and confidence gaps that we focus on, you'll transform how you see yourself, how others see you, and what's possible for your career and your life. Spots are limited, so don't wait. Head to mostpowerful you.com to claim your three hundred dollar early bird savings and nine bonuses before February 21st. I can't wait to support your growth and help you create the career and the life you truly deserve. Let's do this together. I'll see you in the course. Thanks so much for joining us today. And please don't forget to check out findingbrave.org for more programs, resources and tips. And tune in next time for your weekly dose of Finding Brave.