Amazing Career Project Video 5: The Lessons Your Life is Trying to Teach You

Hi, welcome back to the amazing career project. This is video number five. And today we'll be talking about lessons your life is trying to teach you. So here's today's takeaway. Life lessons abound, but are you truly getting them? So let's step back a minute and look at what that really means. What are life lessons and how do we even know them? So I want to remind us of the five core steps that this program is taking you through to go from where you are to amazing career success. And those five steps, step back for an empowered perspective. Let go of the thinking patterns and behaviors that are keeping you stuck. Say yes to your compelling visions. And that just right vision that's going to give you the juice to move you forward, explore. It's not enough just to jump. That doesn't work. Doesn't work. Well, you have to explore it. You've got to try it on and then finally create it. So right now we're in the stepping back phase. So important, so vital. So let's look at life teaching us a lesson. What holds us back? Right, we're getting information every day. We're getting information from people, from our jobs, from our bosses, from our colleagues, from our health. Everything is information. So what stops us from really learning what we're supposed to so that we instead of moving forward, we move sideways, we move backward. What's stopping us? Well, I found that there are key blocks to our learning the lessons we need to. The very first one is being in denial, hunkering down to where you are and your attitude in a particular outcome that you think you have to have. You think that is necessary for you to be happy, for you to have amazing career success. So the first piece of that is, and it is a Buddhist philosophy, a Buddhist principle that when we over attach to a particular outcome, we always suffer. So let me give you an example. I have people who are in the coaching business and they'll say, look, I've launched this thing, I've done everything right, it's not working, but I'm not stopping. I'm not going to stop what I do. I'm absolutely not. I know it's coming. I know it's coming. I know it's coming. Kind of like that. Build it and they will come mentality. Well, sometimes that's just denial. What we really need to do is look at what is not working. Not break ourselves against it, but embrace it. What isn't working is it you're not making enough money, is it you don't enjoy the work, you set out to do right? Is it that you haven't created a niche? Is it that you really don't know who you want to serve? What is it that's making it fail? But if you remain in denial, it's going to be okay. It's going to be okay. It's going to be okay. It's not going to be okay because you got to get out of denial. The second piece is. We've touched on this a little bit before. Women tend to when things aren't going right, when there's a hard lesson to learn, they make themselves wrong. They say, oh, I blew it. I'm a failure. And that isn't the lesson. That is never the lesson. The lesson is, you did the best you could with the information you had and with the person that you are. You did the best you could. Nobody gets out of bed and says, I'm going to blow it today. You did the best. So if you make yourself wrong and if you don't let in what isn't working again, you're just going to waste a lot of time. I gave an example in a previous video where after my corporate career, I became a therapist. And I loved it in the beginning. But as time wore on, it did not fit me as well as coaching. But I made myself wrong about that. So the idea here is, when it isn't working, don't make yourself wrong. Make yourself right and understand what is happening in life that is telling you to move forward and that you have to embrace it. Okay. The third is being overly defensive. So often, in order for us to move forward, we've had to marshal all of our confidence, all of our energy, and we can be a little defensive. We can say, I don't want to hear what you have to say. I don't want to get critique. I just don't want it. Well, when we're overly defended, we're not letting in the input that we need. We're not hearing what needs to be heard. Right? So again, you're not going to catch every ball that's thrown to you. But you need a boundary that allows the information in so that you're not just constantly feeling like you're defending what you're doing. Okay, if we can release those blocks, you're going to start learning the lessons you need to learn. So how do we start seeing them? Starting this moment, how are you going to start seeing the lessons you need to. The very first thing is every day, ask your higher self, which we've talked about before, but as a recap it's not that personality. It's not that ego. It's not that overachiever voice. It's the higher self that hasn't experienced expansive. Look at what's going on. You ask your higher self, what am I to learn today? Every day you ask it. And when you have a challenging situation, you ask the question, what am I to learn today? Right. It's not about defending. It's not about protecting. It's about letting in. What is it that I need to hear? Right. It's back to that same idea that every individual has a message from the universe. For you, what is it? The second is look at patterns and behaviors that keep repeating over and over. That's a lesson. That's a lesson for me. For instance, no matter where I went, I had a boss that I didn't get along with. Right? I would do well, but I wouldn't advance because I didn't get along with my boss. Well, how can it be that you have five jobs and you don't like your boss? Every time one dear friend said to me, I adore you, Kathy, I. But I think you got to look at yourself. And I did. And what was it about? It was about authority. It was about, I don't like being under someone who I don't think understands me, my beliefs, my problems. And I shifted that. I said, that's it. I'm done. I want to attract a boss who I respect, who respects me. And from that moment on, where I saw it was a lesson I had to learn, it's gone. I don't have that. Okay. The third thing is look at your emotions and where you feel pain habitually, Right? Where are you feeling disrespected? Where are you feeling hurt? Where are you feeling unappreciated, undervalued? It's there. That's a lesson that needs to be learned. And often I have to tell you, those feelings come from childhood experiences. So I'd like you to look at what you learned in your family about you. Right? Do any of these painful emotions feel? How old do they feel? Was it when you were four? Was it when you were six? What are you carrying from the past that is activating in your work? Time to look at that. Okay? And the fourth is, it's about who do you need to separate from so that you can really fly? So here's the situation. We create relationships based on who we are today. But sometimes when we want to stretch bigger, those relationships that served us before are not going to serve us now. Sometimes the People in your life are jealous, are threatened, right? I remember when I left the corporate world and said, that's it, I'm done. I'm becoming a therapist. Some of my former corporate friends were like, wow, why do you feel you need to do that? Right. Real put down. And there's reasons for that. It can be that your change is shaking things up in them that they don't want to see. So the idea is to look at what are the relationships that are no longer serving and who do I need to separate from? One way to find this out is ask yourself, who wants me to be all I can be, no matter what that looks like? And if someone pops in your mind as someone who doesn't want you to be all you can be, if you can, it's time to build a boundary and separate. So how do you know if there are lessons that you need to get that you're not learning? Number one, you're feeling very defensive. So what do you do? Let go of the defense and walk right into the critique. Walk into it. I can tell you, I've gotten so much critique about how to do videos, about how to write a blog, right? About how your book should be about. You should write another book and not do this and not do that. If I get defensive, I'm not hearing. So open yourself up. Walk right through the critique. The second thing is, how do you know that you're not learning a lesson? You need to. If you feel that people just don't understand you. People don't get me. I feel misunderstood. I feel unappreciated. I don't connect. If you have that, and that's a chronic feeling for you, it's time for you to shift. And you need to look at. Why do you feel misunderstood? Why do you feel no one gets you? In fact, the world is full of people that are waiting to connect with you, who do understand, you do understand what you're trying to achieve and want to support you. But if you're coming from a place where you feel you've been misunderstood, you're carrying that with you. And you're not open to all of the relationships and help that you could get, another way you can understand if your life is trying to teach you a lesson, is. Is if you feel chronically miserable and you think there's no way out. I hear this over and over and over, especially in these recessionary times. You know, my life, my career is over. I used to write for a newspaper, and now the newspaper's gone. No, I'm done. I'm finished. There's no way out. There is a way out. And here's what you have to know about that. Everything you do is a choice. And you have choice. You have alternatives. You have new ways to reinvent yourself, new reshaping of your skills and talents. Yes, it's not easy. Yes, it takes work. But there is a way out. But you have to believe there is. If you feel chronically happy with no way out, you gotta understand that this is a choice you made and that it's time to make a new choice. That I'm gonna take my skills, take my knowledge, and I'm gonna repurpose it and find another direction that's gonna work for me. Me. And finally, the fourth way you're going to know if life is trying to teach you a lesson and you're not getting it. If you're not open to what I call angels. And I mean that on two levels. There are angels waiting in your life to help you, and there are angels waiting in another dimension, I believe. And if you want to learn more about that, feel free to email me. In my work as an energy healer, I've seen things that defy logic, beautiful things, help that's come from other dimensions. If you're interested, just reach out to me today. We'll talk about help in this dimension. You're going to know that the angels are ready to help you. And they're going to come through the doors and the windows of your life when you start speaking up about your choices, about what you're trying to do, about your lofty goals, about your vision. But you got to let them in. I can't tell you how many people you know I work with, and maybe this is you. Incredibly achievement oriented, highly successful, brilliant, talented women. But they're not good at getting help. They're not good at asking for help. They're not good at understanding when they're vulnerable and need help and need growth. So your life is also teaching you a lesson when you're stuck and you need to go outside yourself to be open to angels who either have the skills that you don't have, have the access to power that you don't have, a complementary skill set or set of tools that's going to help you move forward. Be open to those angels. They're waiting for you there, but you have to open the door for them. That's it for today. Don't forget, click the link below here. Do your homework, be ready for the next session. And I can't wait to see you then. Thank you.