Spirituality and Business Growth: Infuse Your Work With Heart-Connected Practices - by Kathy Caprino

Spirituality and small business growth. I want to tell you why I'm doing this and kind of give you the context for it. I was actually asked by a lovely woman, Patricia, I think we pronounce it Phelan on LinkedIn. And it was after I had posted something about compassion and kindness. And she said, would you ever do a webinar on spirituality and small business? And I said, you know, I'd be happy to think about it. Would anyone else want it? And a number of people said, yes, yes, yes. So here we are. That was a few weeks ago and I developed this and the hope is that it's helpful that what I want to frame it as is this. For concepts about talking to your angels. There are other people, for instance, Lorna Byrne, who I've partnered with and did the retreat with in Ireland, you know, for religious concepts about spirituality, there are other people that are far more immersed in that world. What I'm giving you here are what I consider practical strategies for leveraging your heart and your spirit. I think so often, and this was the case for me in the beginning when I was just learning about spirituality and I have spent a lot of time crafting my own version of it. And it's not a religious concept at all. It's. It's about our higher selves and connecting from love, from compassion, from a generosity place. But so often we hear about and we're taught about spirituality, but it's hard to make it a practice. What do I do? And my world now is all about practical steps, concrete steps that change our lives. So that's what we're talking about here. Are we ready to go? All right, I'm going to share my screen and hopefully you can see those. Let me do the slideshow. Okay, now I'm going to ask you once again to. And where's my chat function? There we go. Lost it. I'm asking you to tell me, do you see these slides? Just a yes would be awesome. Type that in the chat. Okay, wonderful. And we're ready to go. Spirituality and small business growth. How. Thank you, people. How to infuse your work and success with spirituality and heart centered practices. That's what we're going for. And if you would like to folks in the chat and if I can look at it, I will write down why you're coming to this program. There's a million things we're offered every day. If you're on LinkedIn, if you're on Facebook, any kind of social media, you're bombarded in your email with Programs. Why did you come to this one? What is it you're looking for? Give that to me in just a statement and I will do my best to deliver on that. Okay, Put that in the chat. So what we're covering, again, essential practical information to help you bring forward your heart, your spirit, and your values. Your values in all your professional endeavors. Learn how to thrive more fully as you connect with your authenticity, generosity, and power. Now, two things to say. This is aimed at small business owners, but that is a wide range of things that can be private practitioners, consultants, people like me, you know, a coach with a small business. It can be professional people thinking about starting a small business. So the definition is very wide. But really I'm talking about small business concerns and professional concerns. When I'm sharing this information about spirituality, the other thing I want to say is a few other administrative details. While a lot of this is geared to women's issues, I welcome all men who are on the call. A lot of men say, please work with me, please. I don't see anyone else doing what you're doing. And that goes really well. So I love serving men as well. But you will hear a lot about what women are going through because I do believe that women face different challenges than men do in the business world. But I hope that any men on the call are going to get an awful lot from this, too. So let's go over. Oh, I'd love to see what you're saying. I believe in spirituality. I really enjoy. Oh, thank you, Ellen. I'm in sales. Authenticity, vulnerability. Love it. Thank you. Thanks so much. So few admin details. We're on zoom. As you know, you're all muted so that there's no background noise. But again, feel free to share in the chat. You give a thumbs up, raise your hand if you like something. But I am going to open the call for live questions and put those in the Q and A section in as succinct and clear a question as you can can provide. Okay. We're doing 75 minutes of training plus the Q&A. 15 minutes. I'm sure I'll run longer. I always do. And stay on as long as you can. Take notes. Think about. I always love to say, think about what you resonate with. Like, wow. Yeah. But also what you resist because there's growth in what you're saying. I don't want that to be the case. Or I don't like that. Not that you have to believe everything I'm sharing here, but look at what you're resisting because usually that is where the action is called for. We are being recorded. Let me make sure I did that. Yep, recording. And all of you, if you have to hop off, all registrants are going to get an email from me later today, probably by this evening with the recording of the audio, video and the slides. Feel free to share what you're gaining from this anywhere you want. LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook. I'm Athy Caprino on all of those. I'm Lia Communications on Facebook. That's my business page. And you can spirituality and growth if you'd like to and do stay tuned if you can, all the way to the end. Because I think there are now six bonuses that I'm giving you for showing up here, for simply showing up. Are we ready to go? Okay. Some things are in the way of my slides. All right, so here again, I'm talking about a practical concept of spirituality. And this is my view. This is not an objective truth. This is how I see it. Oh, I do want to share. Where did I learn this? Most of you know, if you've been following me, I had an 18 year corporate career that was successful on the outside, but a mess on the inside. And you know, when I write this information and I'm writing, you know, my new book is, is out for pre orders today. I'll tell you more about that as I'm writing all this. I remember so keenly that those 18 years, they were fraught with crises. I was chronically ill, toxic bosses, toxic colleagues, narcissism, narcissistic leaders, no work life balance, no meaning in the work. But when I focus on this aspect of spirituality, I had none of it then. I didn't feel I could be loving, caring, generous, kind. I get choked up when I talk about it. And I think that is part of why I was chronically ill in the throat. Tracheitis, infection of the throat, the trachea, every three months for four years. Because what is the throat? The seat of your personal expression. And do you know, from the day I was laid off, the month after 9, 11, I have never had that again. So I know what it feels like not to be able to be a spiritual individual. It's heartbreaking and brutal. So I am giving here everything I've learned from not being able to be this person that can give light in any way. And also, you know, I've been doing this small business for 15 years. In the beginning it, I've got to be honest, it was rough because I was trying to earn money and make A name for myself. But I lost my connection to spirituality. So I'm sharing with you perspectives from what I lost and now what I've gained from a lot of work in how to be your highest self. So here's what I believe. Spirituality is an animating force within us. It's a sense of connection to something bigger than this. It's a pathway to more meaning and purpose. I think that so many people struggle. I don't have meaning. I don't have purpose. I don't know what my purpose is. Well, I think that's a spiritual journey, frankly. It's also aligning with what is universal in us, not what separates and divides us. I mean, raise your hand if you are sick to death of how hateful we are to each other in our country today. We are. You know, Brene Brown talks about we're standing in our bunkers and we only allow. We only like people or love people. Thank you. Who are in the bunker with us. Ideologically, it's sickening. It's sickening to us and it's hurting us in every possible way. So I'm talking about finding what is the same across all of us, not what's different. None of this is easy, but it's so worthwhile. It's also about identifying, embracing our higher selves. I'm going to use that term a lot. It's funny, I'm going to mention later, and I'm mentioning now Polly McGee, who is someone I beautiful spiritual individual who teaches and trains entrepreneurs about the spiritual life as it affects their entrepreneurship. So I have resources at the end where you can click on to see who I'm talking about, who I'm mentioning here. But she and I were talking on my podcast and she said I don't really love the term higher self because it sounds like we're going to have to beat ourselves up because we're not. That I don't agree. And it's so cool. We, we love each other and we don't agree on some stuff. I like the concept of higher self because it's clear to me because I know when I'm being my lower self. I know it. I know what it sounds like. My lower self is ego based, defensive, insecure, fear based. The higher self is not like that. Like, even as I came in to give this talk, my son who lives with me now and is working from home, said, are you nervous? I am so nervous. Was so not nervous to give this talk. I'm nervous to give other talks. But I think one, it's the concept of spirituality, that is just a joy to talk about. It's nothing stress inducing, but I think that when we engage our higher self, the self that is connected to the all that is, you know, more than this, the ego, the personality, things just go better. I do think that spirituality is also infused with compassion and kindness and love and empathy and fluidity and connection. And all of that gives richness in every sense of that word to what you're doing and the success you have in your life and in your business. And it is not based in fear. Spirituality is grounded in bravery, respect, generosity and service. And frankly, it's grounded in strength, which is something I think women get confused about. We're going to talk about. Okay, so how do we define it? Here's a definition. This is my definition. For me, spirituality in our business and professional life is not a religious concept. It's nothing to do with religion. It is a feeling, it's a practice. And it's a commitment to connection and oneness that flows through all individuals, all walks of life and all belief systems. You don't have to be a religion, a certain religion or religious at all to be spiritual. This is really important. I think it's not about also being passive and weak. And I have struggled with this. So if I've struggled, so have thousands. It's not letting people walk all over us. It encompasses strength and bravery and self love and acceptance and power, positive power to lift yourself up and support other people as well. Another thing that's really important, there is no natural boundary or separation between spirituality and business and financial success. We create that. We with our messed up beliefs and misguided ideas, we create a boundary so that we get very confused about success, money, influence, power, that it's not spiritual. And that's just wrong. It's just misguided. We embrace some ideas that aren't helpful and aren't correct if we think that there's a boundary. Anybody believe what I'm talking about? Raise your hand if anything resonates. Thank you, Laura Lara. Alright, so some key concepts that we're going to be talking about. While respecting yourself and doing what calls to you to create success, you're also coming from a place of service, of being of help, of thinking of other people's needs. Not just, let's say, let's make it practical. Yeah, I have bonuses at the end of this to. What's the word? Support you for being on this call. But if all I'm thinking about is how I'm going to get over what are you going to buy? What are you going to take? And trust me, I've come from that. When you are. When you're struggling with money, often it's very hard to be the generous person you want to be. You want to be generous, but yet you can't pay your bills. So we're going to talk about money later. But I think true spirituality in business is being of service. That's what it is. It's not looking at, what am I going to get? What am I going to get? What am I going to get? It's power to do something, not power over. That's where women shun it. I've had people talk about women, say to me, I don't want power. Why not? Because it's abusive. No, power in and of itself is not abusive. It's how it's manifested by some people. And I think many of us know who, who's doing that in big ways today. I mean, a lot of us have it in, in our lives or people we're dealing with in our business. They're trying to suppress you or take from you. Okay. Some other key concepts that I'm just setting the stage for. It's important if you're going to take a spiritual view of your business that you don't overly attach to a particular outcome. Like, I'm going to be talking about my book. When you're kind of coming from your lower self, often it's, I've got to have this publisher, I've got to get this advance. It's got to come out now. There's a lot of prerequisites that you attach to outcomes. That doesn't work. It doesn't work. We want to, certainly, we want to believe in the vision, but you've got to be open to what the universe is going to give you, which is quite different often from what you think it has to be. Again, spirituality involves strength, knowing who to separate from, and making your own decisions. I live in this world where everybody's given you tips and strategies for how to make more money in your small business. I swear to you, 90% of it kind of makes me gag. It's not what works for me. You've got to know who you are and know who to separate from. That's part of the spiritual approach to your business. And again, Polly McGee, who I just adore in our finding great podcast. And by the way, you're going to get slides in the email that we sent to you and all of these links here you can click on and they'll go to the right destination. But in our Finding Brave podcast, she said T.S. eliot wrote, Hell is the place of no connection. I think this is what we're talking about. How do we connect to ourselves, to our heart and to others? Okay, so what's going on here? Why do we need this content? Why do we need a shift? Well, with my first book, Breakdown Breakthrough did a research study and it showed this. 8 out of 10 want more peace of mind. 7 out of 10 people interviewed want more passion, power and purpose. 6 out of 10 want more fulfillment. 6 out of 10 want more balance. 5 out of 10 want to be in another line of work entirely. And seven out of 10 were facing a major turning point. That data hasn't changed. But there's some more data that I want to show you. Show you. Here's another thing I learned through I think you all know. I had a corporate career, then became a therapist, then morphed into career coach, writer, speaker trainer, teacher, and Forbes contributor. Here's what I learned and I learned this. A lot of what I'm talking about I learned in my therapeutic training and time as a therapist, marriage and family therapist. Your business and career and your life aren't just happening to you. It's not random. We are co creating it every day. We are co creating it. If you think it's a random life now, there are some things we're certainly not in control of 100% and that may seem like, like a pandemic hitting us. We didn't, we didn't co create it. Although some people co created it in that. I won't even go there, don't even want to touch that. But we are co creating what is occurring and what we are attracting every day. So what's important to look at is what chronically repeats that is hurtful, negative and unsatisfying. That's what you want to look at because that isn't random. And same with, you know, the wonderful stuff that you're attracting that's positive and enriching and uplifting, you are co creating that. But we want to look at what isn't working. That's how I help people have a breakthrough. What's good is good. You're rocking it. What is not working, let's focus on that and then close those power gaps. That's where we want to focus your spirituality most right now. So what is going wrong? Where are the struggles? And what I'd love you to do is in this particular slide, if this resonates with you, anything I'M sharing. I'd love you to type that in the chat. Which of these are you struggling with, if any? And if there's something else, let me know. Where I hear business owners are struggling and professionals are number one. They don't feel recognized and valued. They feel isolated. I used to go into my corporate life and think I'm not like any of these people and they don't even know who I am and they don't care to know who I am. So that's feeling isolated. Please do you know, raise your hand or type in, yeah, that's me. Or they believe they're meant for something bigger, something better, something richer. Okay. Or they aren't advancing or experiencing financial and other rewards that they honestly feel they deserve. Gosh. I mean, this was all, this was, all of this was me at one point. You aren't doing work that feels right, good or purposeful if you're doing work for someone. And boy, I run a course, the Amazing Career Project, and we're in week 16 weeks and we're in week 10 of it. I do it three times a year. A number of people have said what they are asking me to do is it's so inappropriate, it's scary, it's not safe, and it's unethical. If you're doing work that feels like that, we've got to engage your spirit here and we got to change something, something big. Business owners tell me they're exhausted from the struggle, working so hard and I'm not making anything, or I'm tired of the toxicity and the conflict and the confusion, or overall, they don't feel able to reach their highest, most joyful potential, but they don't know why. Is that anybody? Okay, now I want to talk about something that's really near and dear my heart now, because it's what I just wrote a book on. I did a survey recently. Thank you for raising your hands on the seven damaging power gaps the professional women face. And I'm going to talk about those today because they have a spiritual component, every one of them. And that is the framework that I see women moving forward, fastest, going through. It's where real breakthrough happens. So that's going to be a framework that I'm going to be talking about with a spiritual component embedded into it. The survey that I've done recently shows and about a thousand women have taken it, 98% of professional women, and that includes small business owners who are surveyed were experiencing at least one of these seven gaps. 98% and 75% are having three or more at the same time. When I asked people to rate the one most pressing gap, it was number six, losing sight of my most thrilling dream for my life. That's a spiritual problem, if you ask me. It's of the spirit and of the heart. Here are the topics. Seven gaps. And again, we're going to be talking about this for about five or ten minutes. Gap. Number one, not recognizing your special talents and gifts. And I'm going to go into each one and give you practical steps from a spiritual perspective to close these gaps. Number two, communicating from fear, not strength. Number three, reluctance to ask for what you want and what you deserve. Number four, isolating from influential support. Number five, acquiescing instead of saying stop to what is not right, what is unfair, what is mistreatment. Number six is losing sight of your thrilling dream. Number seven, allowing the past trauma and experiences to define you. If you would type in the numbers of the gaps that you think you might have, that would be helpful for me. I mean, 98% have at least one of these, so I'm guessing you might too. So what is the solution to all of this? All the struggle, all the confusion, all the toxicity, all the why can't I make the money I need to? Why can't I do the work I want? Why can't I find partners that treat me well or that I can work well with? Here's the solution. In my view, we've got a world full of noise and distraction and separation and now hatred and judgment. We're in bad shape and we need to connect with each other more deeply, with our true spirit, the sense of who we are in the world, what we're doing here, why we matter. And we have to be in alignment with those values and we have to stand up for those values. And that to me, is living your true spirit. That is it. When you integrate that true spirit, that knowledge of who I am and why I'm worthy and everyone is worthy, every single person worthy, worthy of what you want. And when you can expand your sense of power, positive power and service and impact in all you do, here's what happens. You have all of this in much greater proportion. Bravery, authenticity, positive impact, joy, connection, reward, purpose, peace, balance, integrity, which is so important. Integrity is doing what you say and saying what you'll do and doing it. And strength and yes, financial success. It's going to come much more easily. And prosperity and abundance when you are in alignment with who you really are. Okay, again, what does it feel like when you are spiritually Centered in your business. You engage in meaningful work. You earn and give respect and recognition and reward. You leverage your amazing talents in different ways than you are today. You build heart connected relationships. You lose that fear of vulnerability. So many people are afraid. Giving of being, of coming out, of putting out a website and saying, here's what I do that's different from what they do. People are so afraid and you're going to uplift and enrich yourself while you're enriching others. What blocks us most from this? From being our spiritually grounded and centered self and coming forward in a big way. It's a million fears. Fear of failure, fear of success. You wouldn't be, you would be shocked. People are afraid to hit that million dollar mark or have that best selling book. They're in some ways sabotaging the very thing they say they want. Fear of burden. It's going to be such a burden. A lot of this is informed by Gay Hendricks, amazing work and his book the Big Leap. It's fantastic. And again, I'm pretty sure that's in the resources page at the end of the this program. Fear of unworthiness. I'm not worthy of the thing I think I want. Yes you are. Yes you are. If you want it, you're worthy of it. Fear of humiliation, fear of loss, fear of greatness, fear of standing up. Because women get punished often when we're assertive, when we're strong in our patriarchal world. But we have to not let that stop us. And finally, honestly, so many women are afraid of people's judgments. What will they think of me? What do I say? Why are so many stuck? Why, after reading a million spiritual books or going to Eckhart Tolle's webinars, who I adore, why can't we move forward? Because it's not insight that changes you, it's action. It's doing things differently. It's brave, empowered action. That thing that you said, I can't believe I just did that. If I can do that thing, thing, I can do anything. That's what changes our lives, not thought. That's why I moved away from therapy, frankly. Even though I was trained in marriage and family therapy, which is behavioral and solution focused, I felt that a lot of therapeutic work is talking about insight and thought. And that doesn't change our lives. If you, I mean, this is my view. We have to be different, we have to act differently and we need some new behaviors and mindsets. So what I want to talk about for about 10 minutes is the flip side of those power gaps is bravery in seven ways. Brave sight, brave speak, brave ask, brave connection, brave challenge, brave service, brave healing. And of course, there's my book. You can check that out. What happens when you become brave? All these things that we want. We have self mastery. We're in control of our emotions. We're not incredibly reactive and defensive and vulnerable and insecure. We have personal courage. We communicate with strength. We have positive relationships, thrilling visions. We're using our natural talents and skills, not those skills that we don't want to use, that are hard to use. I learned that the hard way in my corporate life. And we're using our natural talents, the ones that come easily, that are a joy to give. And we are making ourselves the highest authority in terms of our decisions. What we know to be true, who we're going to let go of, who we're not going to listen to, who we are going to listen to, who we're going to partner with, who we're going to serve. I'm going to talk about that in a minute. And finally, these paths help you have more financial success as well. So what is it? Let's get to it. Spirituality in action. I love this. This quote from Amit Ray that I found in every crisis, doubt or confusion, take the higher path, the path of compassion, courage, understanding and love. That is the framework for what we're about to talk about. So here we go. Some spiritual. I gotta move the chat box here. There we go. It's in the way. How do I move it? There we go. That's a little better. Brave site. So, first of all, in your small business, in your consulting business, in your private practice, in your professional life, do you understand the richness of what you have to offer and who you want to serve? That's the step number one in a small business. And, you know, it isn't easy. You know, I can give you a million anecdotes here. When I first started out, when I was a therapist, I would see that I would love it on my calendar when professional women were on the calendar and needed therapeutic work and wanted to work with me. And often they were depressed and anxious. And it was about a lot of stuff that we're talking about here. But I started gravitating towards helping professional women. Then when I became a coach, I did that as well. I love it because there's like a shortcut with women. I know women's challenges maybe more than anyone on the planet because I lived them and now I've studied them. So I lived at 18 years and I've studied it for 15. Well, that's who I want to serve. But when I first started out, I didn't want to say I was a woman's coach. I didn't want to put that on the website. And my branding guy, Robert Friedman, said, didn't you just write a book for women? Uh huh. Didn't you spend a year back then in 2008 studying women's challenges? Uh huh. Didn't you say you love it when you see professional women on your calendar? Uh huh. Why wouldn't you want to say you're a woman's coach? So who are you? What are the gifts that you have and who do you want to serve? And most particularly here, what are your natural capabilities and strengths and are you using those? Okay, so let's talk about who you serve, who you want to serve in your business. You got to get clearer on this. It can't be everyone, it can't be everyone on the planet or you're not going to do anything useful for them. Create a niche. Who is it that you want to serve? What's their demographic? What's their psychographic? What are the challenges they're facing? Why that group? What's the mess you want to turn into a message in your own life? You've got to get clear now and start putting your stake in the ground on who you want to serve. And, and part of that is connecting all the dots of who you've ever been. Because when you do that, you're going to understand why this group is so important for you to serve. And when you can talk about that and share that and demonstrate that you become very powerful. And to me, this is a spiritual endeavor saying, who is it that I want to help and why? And why am I worthy to do it? Well, you are worthy to do because you want to. Okay, I have something called a career path assessments. 11 pages of questions I wish someone had asked me when I first started out. And I swear to you, if I had answered them at age 22 or 25, I would not have pursued the career, the corporate career I did. I wouldn't have done it. So take that again. You're going to be able to click on the link in the PDF you get later tonight. It's free. A lot of people will send that to me hoping I can give you my input. I can only do that if there's a session, a career consultation session you sign up for. Excuse me, but you will get a lot out of doing it if you answer these Questions. Give it a few hours. Give it, you know, a few days to percolate. You're going to learn a lot about yourself. Okay? Okay. Bravespeak is the second bravery boosting path we need to get you on. It's time now in your business to share more powerfully what you do. Oh, women struggle like you wouldn't believe about this. Differently from men. Excuse me, I need water. Thank you. A lot of talking this week. You can't believe how women struggle with this. Looking at my notes here, women struggle so much to speak powerfully, and there's a reason for it. Again, we don't just pop out of the chute not, not being assertive. It's a learned behavior. We live in a patriarchal world. And if you want more, to learn more about that, I interviewed Terry Real, who's an amazing therapist on my Finding Brave podcast, and he talks about what it is for both men and women to live in a patriarchal world. But it's pretty powerful and disturbing, frankly. But what happens is, for women is at about age 13, women start going underground. They used to believe they, you know, they could be a leader, they could be an astronaut, they could work in stem, science, technology, engineering, math. They believed in themselves. At about age 13, it all changes. They start to go underground. They don't speak up as assertively. They become very concerned with their body image. They become very concerned with social media and what people are saying. There's a lot that goes behind why we don't speak powerfully, but we have to change it. And again, I feel this is a spiritual endeavor because this is the way we're going to come forward in the world. If we're staying quiet, how are we going to be of service? How are we going to be generous? How are we going to give and teach and offer what we have to offer if we don't speak up? So get to the heart of. If you have a reluctance of speaking up, look at the root of it. Almost invariably it's from childhood. There's a chapter in, in my book that didn't make it. You know, it's like a movie when they do editing. They. It's too long. They had to cut it out. I'd love to give it just. Just free. We'll figure that out. But it's the. The chapter was called, you are what your childhood taught you to be. And that is the truth, unless you've healed it and unlearned it. So usually our reluctance to speak powerfully came from what we learned in our childhood. And the family systems we had. So what I'm asking you to do is where did you learn not to speak powerfully and what can you do about it today? Where can you stop apologizing? Where can you start speaking about your talents in a richer way, in a more confident way? There's, you know, again, in the book, I talk all about how to do this, but you can watch my TEDx talk. Time to brave up. And it gives you really specific exercises to take to understand the 20 facts of you, what you've done that no one can take away from, no one can say you didn't. The accomplishments, the achievements that you're most proud of. Write those 20 facts down. Make sure you're putting that on LinkedIn. Oh, that's another thing, whole new webinar on LinkedIn. How you do LinkedIn is how you do your life, how you do your work. Are you hiding? Do you not have a picture? Do you not have a cover image that shows who you are? Do you not have a summary? Do you have a tagline, your headline? That's just your job. Don't do that because you're more than your job. There's a lot. There's a lot. And I have a lot of training materials on that if you're interested in. But it's time that you start speaking up powerfully. The third dimension, the third brave coming forward, power boosting path that again, I think has a spiritual underpinning. Start asking for what you need. You can't do it alone. So what is it that you need today for you to come out in a bigger way in your business, in your career? Do you have staff? Do you need more from them? Partners, suppliers, funders, clients, customers? I could do a whole hour just on this. You know, when I first started out as a coach, people walked all over me. People were my clients. You know, they want two hours when they paid for one. They'd attack me via email if they didn't get that job that we did interview coaching for. And it's taken me all these years to build boundaries, to make it clear what I'm asking of my clients, which is a number of kind of rules and protocols for how we work together. And if they won't abide by those, we don't work together. So even that is a brave ask that has a spiritual underpinning. Do you know that you're worthy to ask for what you want and are you doing it? It's all about boundaries, which again, I feel come from a connection with your higher self. So what do you need today? Write it down. What is it that you need most? Whether it's a small business loan, which is happening now, you know, people are signing up by the millions. Is it something you need differently from your customers, from your clients? Is it you need your staff to step up now? What is it? What do you need? And can you ask for it? Know what you want and accept that you're deserving of it? Maybe you need to raise your prices. Maybe a different kind of partnership. Maybe more help from your spouse. What do you need to bring your small business forward in a way that's aligned with who you are? Identify that clearly and make a stand and do not cave. Okay. Are you getting stuff out of this? Let me know. All right. Brave Connection. Build a powerful support network of helpers and ambassadors and supporters. Do you have people in your corner? Oh, Laura, thank you. Do you have people in your corner who would do anything for you and who have the power to help in big ways? I make that face because I get teary eyed. You know, in doing the book, there's a lot of help. You know, I featured 30 people and it was a lot of work. You know, there was contribution that they gave and then we had to have them sign an agreement that they were giving us permission to publish that in the book. And there were people that I asked for for blurbs for the book. You know, you. It's just the most beautiful thing when someone stops what they're doing and writes you an endorsement. You know, we have one from even Seth Godin, who's so generous and so busy. I mean, these people, Seth Godin is about the most productive person and so is every single person who's given a blurb. They stop what they're doing to craft an endorsement. That's what having Brave Connection is. It's a powerful support network. Now what's really important to know though is it's not a one way street. Now, Seth Godin, what am I gonna do that's gonna help him? But others of these people I've already featured in my podcast, I'm featuring in the book. It's a mutual give and take. That's what's really. That's a spiritual idea as well. Yeah. You are reaching out to people who are 10 steps or 100 steps ahead of you, but you also have something to give to them. Judy Robinette, who wrote a blurb, who I've featured a million places and she is one of my biggest sponsors. She has a Rolodex of billionaires and she is the kind of person that says, what do you need? And she'll, you know, there's a whole story about that. But after I interviewed her in Forbes, about a month later, I got an email from her. How are you? Here's what's happening with me. What do you need? I said, what do I need? I've never gotten an email like that. And she meant it. And I said, you're not going to let this chance pass you by. So I said at the time, I'd love to work with more entrepreneurial women and leaders. Would you know anyone who would be interested in coaching? And she gave me five names and their email addresses. She said, I want you to reach out and I'm going to be following up, so you better. That's what having sponsors and people in your network who uplift you, they open doors when you're not in the room. But the end of that story is I said, oh, my, thank you so much. Now, what can I do for you? And she said, actually, you can help me. I have to write a bio for some presentation I'm giving, and I'm not good at that. Would you help me? Well, I whipped up her bio in half a second. I mean, this is what I do. I'm a writer. And she was grateful. You've got to know that you have so much to offer. It's not just, ugh, I have nothing here. Okay, good. Finally. Not finally. We've got a few more. Again. What this is, is the brave antidote to the seven damaging power gaps. Brave challenge. Stop tolerating the intolerable. Just, you gotta stop. Thousands of women. I mean, look at the Me Too movement. But it's happening every place. And not in necessarily. Does it have to be in those dramatic ways? It can be any kind of mistreatment or discrimination or bias or disrespect or being devalued or being passed over or having a client treat you like crap and you not saying anything, or a customer. Where are you acquiescing instead of saying stop? You know, I want to say something to you about this strength. A few years ago, I connected with Lorna Byrne, who literally sees angels and speaks to angels. And it's an amazing story. And I've linked to an interview I did with her and as I mentioned, did an Ireland retreat with her. Lacey was there with 2020amazing women. And Lorna. And before that, the year before, I interviewed her. And then I was going to Ireland and my son was in London, study abroad. And I took my son and My daughter and I said to Lorna, could we come visit you? And unbelievably, she said yes. And we came to her house and we had lunch and oh, and sitting next to her, I feel like I'm one step closer to God, honestly, the God that I believe in. And I had just had a terrible row with someone about a month before, which was so unlike me. This person to me was so disrespectful. He was a partner in marketing. And we were walking in a park after seeing Lorna in New York, give her talk, and we got into a fight and I screamed at the top of my lungs in the middle of this park at 10 at night. And it went so badly. And I was sick about it. Like, how could I have done that? And I was telling Lorna when we were having lunch a few months later, and I said, I don't feel like a spiritual person having done that. And she, she is a powerful person. She went, wait a minute. No. Power is not, not spiritual. You're not being an anti spiritual or unspiritual person. When you stand up for yourself powerfully, you must recognize that. And I swear, you know, it was a healing of a million years, but I've taken that to heart. We don't have to be cruel or harsh or aggressive, but being powerfully protective of who you are and who you love and your values is not something that is not spiritual. So recognize what you need to address. Get clear on what you're accepting that you can't accept anymore. Do the internal work to understand also why you have allowed it. That is an essential step. Essential step. You've allowed it probably because you've been conditioned to allow it. I want you to look at your childhood. If there was any narcissism or emotional manipulation, our boundaries were violated. It wasn't safe to speak up. Well, when you're trained that way and programmed that way in your adult life, you don't speak up either. Decide to. Outside help is necessary. Like for me, there was a point in my corporate career after my layoff, I said, enough. And I went to a lawyer and it went very well. It wasn't copacetic, what it was done to me. And the lawyer helped me get a settlement. And it was a life changing experience to do that. Life changing. I took a stand. I wasn't just good girl Kathy anymore. That doesn't speak up, that doesn't push back. It was a life changing event. Take a stand, but get support. Don't try to do it on your own. Going to a lawyer who was steeped in experience about how employees are mistreated or there's unethical behavior, or you know and understood the rights of employees, that was a life changer for me. So don't try to do it alone. But again, this is what we need to be the spiritual person we want to be. This is what has to happen. Brave path number six is brave service. Finally do the work you're meant to do. Maria Nemeth wrote a book, the Energy of Money. I adore this book. I adore everything she's ever said. I link to it or give you the title in the resources. She wrote this in the Energy of Money, which is all about your money story, but it's a guidebook for life. She said people are happiest when demonstrating in physical reality what they know to be true about themselves while giving form to their life intentions in ways that help others. I don't think any truer words have ever been said. Let me break it down. Are you demonstrating what you know to be true about yourself? So for instance, when I was in the beginning years of my coaching practice, I wasn't making enough money. It was exhausting, it was draining what happened here? I knew something was off. But when I read this quote, I knew what was off. I wasn't demonstrating in reality, in physical reality, what I knew to be true about myself. I'm a smart person. I had a 18 year corporate career in marketing. I managed $30 million budgets. I know how to help people. What is wrong here? And I hadn't gotten in touch with the life intentions I have. What is it when I'm looking back on my deathbed, 95 looking back, what do I want to have done? What will I regret not doing? What do I want to have given, offered, been represented, demonstrated? What's the legacy? And you know what? So many people fill out my career path assessment and say, I want to be of help. You got to do better than that. Help how? How do you want to show up? What's the difference you want to make? That he can't make, that she can't make? This is a spiritual practice. What's the brave service you're going to embrace now? And so how do we get there? There's some pathways. It's time to listen to yourself. It's time to develop a very intimate personal relationship with yourself. And every morning, be quiet, spend 5 minutes, 10 minutes, talk to yourself. What do I need to learn today? What. What do I need to hear from you? And it can be Your God, your universe, your angels, whatever you want. It could be your higher self. I do believe in angels. I do actually write to angels and speak to. I speak through typing and I speak in my mind. And truthfully, I don't want to woo. Woo you out, but I actually hear a response, and it is not me. It is not the language I have. And they often say something like, dearest Kathy, we see how you see this problem, but we do not see it in the same way. And then they'll tell me how they see it. I feel like it's an angel collective that I'm speaking to or a spiritual guidance collection. You know, a lot of people say, what a bunch of hogwash. It's not a bunch of hogwash to me because this advice changes me and helps me. And I feel a sense of love that comes through me that I don't normally have when I'm not connecting in that way. But it doesn't have to look like that for you. You can just talk to your own higher guidance. And the way to do that is to be quiet, is to listen, is to tune it all out, is to not have your phone and your devices and be constantly working and constantly thinking. You just need quiet. Listen to yourself. What is it saying now? What is it saying? Type something down here as you're listening. What are you suddenly knowing about your work, your business, your consulting practice, your professional life? What do you know now that you just didn't know an hour ago? And you know, I want to say this to you. Every workshop I do or every webinar or every coaching call, I want there to be a breakthrough. I want you to be different after the call than you were in the beginning of the call. That's the goal. I don't want this just to be a talking head and you going, oh, well, that was nice. I want a breakthrough for you, but you need to meet me halfway for that to happen. So what do you think? In hearing everything I'm talking about, what needs to change in your work? One word, two words. Write it down, put it in the chat, then trust yourself and do something. It's not enough to think it. It's not enough. Yeah, more faith. But, Melissa, So I'm going to push you. If you had more faith, what would you do? So let's peel it. Peel it. Be your own coach. Yes, I want more faith. Well, what would you do if you were that future person that had more faith? How would you know? Okay. Lara wants to know that business and spirituality go hand in hand. I love it. Here's another. It's a. I think it's a spiritual practice. Visualize with all your senses that future you. I read an amazing book. Oh, darn it. This is not in the resources, but I'll change that and add it. Shakti Gawain has a book, Creative Visualization. It's years old, 20 years old, best selling millions of copies. This little book, I'm not kidding. How many years ago did I read it? 20. I'm walking through a bookstore in New York, Manhattan. I swear to you, this book fell off the shelf onto the floor in front of me. And I was just starting a spiritual practice then, and I went, this is kind of interesting. I took it and I bought it. Life Changer now it helps me, literally, like a movie in my head, visualize what I want. And I did it. With my first book, Breakdown Breakthrough. I visualized walking into the bookstore. I think it was was Borders Bookstore then, which has gone away. And I was walking hand in hand with my children. That's what I saw in my mind. And I saw the book cover before they designed the book cover. I saw the colors blue and red. And it works. And there's reasons it works. I won't bore you with it, but visualize with all your senses what you want. It's worked. She talks about doing a vision board. There's something about it marshals all your internal resources to make this happen when you see it. But then you have to believe it and operate from the understanding that it has already happened. You have to be that future self. So, for instance, the first time I ever wrote a blog post, I thought I was going to throw up. You know, what do I have to say? People are going to laugh. But I did it. I pressed publish. And the first time the organization 85 Broads, which is now Elevate, said, look, we have a Forbes blog. If you want to submit, you're a member. We'll let you submit a story, and if we like it, we'll post it there. I did. I didn't doubt. I said, okay, here we go. And the second one I did went viral. And I got an email from the Forbes woman editor. It said this, Kathy, do you want your own Forbes block? You know, you have to believe in yourself, that future self, but then act on it, embody it until you are it. We're gonna. I want you to type in your questions because if you don't have questions with this, I'm not doing my job. So type in your question very, you know, concretely Concisely. And I want to take your questions, your questions make it very rich. Gonna take them in about 15 minutes. The key to know is you don't have to risk everything. Everybody comes to me. I definitely want a change in my career or I want to get out of my business, or I want to start a new business, or I want to be a consultant. But they think they have to throw the whole baby out with the bathwater. They have to risk everything. They have to risk their 401k. They have to. You don't have to risk anything to start exploring, doing work that is tied to your heart. You have to do it wisely, you have to test it out. There's all sorts of ways to do that. And I'm going to give you a resource later that'll walk you through it. But you don't have to throw everything out to do work that is closer to your spirit and your heart. So one question I'd ask you to have, ask you to ask yourself. If you knew you couldn't fail at this thing and it would all work out beautifully, what would you want to explore and pursue? What is it? Write it in. What I love to say here is, look, people say to me, oh, you wrote a book, now two books. I want to write a book. You know, you're my inspiration and I say, wonderful. Are you writing? No, not writing. Well, you can't write a book if you're not writing anything. Writers write, teachers teach. You want to teach something, do a webinar. Now's the time everybody's looking for online stuff. Start. Start writing a blog, start writing an article. Become the person you say you want to. I can't tell you how many people say in this career path assessment, I am the head of hr, but what I really want to do is become a speaker and write a book. Well, have you write it? Have you, have you written the book proposal? Have you done competitive research? Get going. Don't wait. Start so irit. I hope I'm pronouncing it correctly. You want to be meaningful? How, how do you want to be more meaningful? What would be more meaningful? We now have to dimensionalize it. We got to get us out of the gate now and start doing it. Pursue it in a risk free way. I want to start a blog, Darn it. Or I want to start a podcast. Podcasts do. If you get an editor, they cost a little. There's some cost, but a blog doesn't. If you want to write, start writing on LinkedIn. There's cost free Ways, risk free ways to do it and start telling everybody, ooh, you know what you want. So Leslie, pursue your interior design business. I love it. I love it. Now what I do have to say is because I'm a career coach and a business coach, you do have to start doing these things in wise ways. For instance, you don't want to invest 100,000 before you even have a website or before you have a package that you offer people or before you've ever had a client. There are ways to get going in the business that you don't lose everything. Years ago I gave a half day work, was it all day workshop with new entrepreneurs and they were all talking about how do I start a blog? And yet they were hemorrhaging money. You have to really be good with your numbers and really be good with, you know, with money. And we're going to talk about that in a minute. Let's do that. Brave healing. Finally, the seventh brave path again. You are what your childhood taught you to be. What messages, what behaviors, what coping strategies did you learn in your family that may no longer be serving you. It's really important to understand that you have to address and heal what is not working. Okay. And again, I have more resources to help you do that at the end. For any small business person, for any person in any kind of business capacity, you gotta get good with money. I interviewed Susan Stabbit. Stabot, I forget how to pronounce it. And I quoted her in my book. She used to run amex's open division for small business and entrepreneurs. And I asked her, what's the difference between male and female entrepreneurs? So interesting. She said, number one, women say, I'm not good with the numbers. Most women, I'm not good with the numbers. Men don't say that. Number two, women. When you ask a woman, do you think you can scale this idea? They say, eh, I'm not sure. Men say, yes, I can do it. Number three, why'd you start this business? Men say, to make money, to earn money. Women say, because it's a mission, it's a passion. Well, I understand that it's an omission and a passion, but I think you want to make money doing it. So you've got to get good with money now you got to get good with your numbers. You got to see what is the money coming in, what is going out. Manage your expenses, manage your resources. You got to do it. Yes, you can get an accountant, yes, you can get a bookkeeper, but you got to own it. So Maria Nemeth's book is going to help you, the energy of money. Understand your money story. How did it develop? Who wielded money and power when you were growing up? How was money dealt with? Was there stealth secrecy? Was it open? Was it transparent? Was it powerful? Was it weak? Was there victimization? What did your parents think about money? You know, for instance, if they used to say the filthy rich, and you think being rich is filthy, you can never be wealthy because you think it's filthy. You got to know what your money story is and how is it holding you back. And another piece of this, which is a spiritual piece. Do you feel that earning a lot of money and loving money makes you less spiritual? Because it doesn't. Now, if it's all about greed and all about me, me, me, yeah, that's going to get in the way. You're not going to make the money you want. But loving money and seeing it as an energy form that flows, that the more you have, the more you can give is a spiritual practice. You got to love money but not make it a God. Do you understand what I mean? Not be a slave to it. So what are some daily spiritual practices that are going to connect your heart, connect your spirit, bring your authenticity, authentic self out and your values? Number one, gratitude. It's about the quickest pathway to a spiritual life and also connection from your heart. In your business, be grateful. What can you be grateful for? What are you grateful for? Right now, we're feeling not a lot of gratitude. We're scared out of our minds that we're gonna get sick, that our loved ones are gonna die. And I'm right there with you. I have a very elderly mother in an assisted living facility where now there is Covid. Even though I'm scared out of my mind for her, there are things I'm grateful for. Gratitude shifts you immediately. Just sit for five minutes and write down what you're grateful for. And don't dial it in. You know, I have a session prep form for clients that work with me, and they fill it in right before every. Every session. And I say, what are you grateful for? And some people cut and paste it from two weeks before. Don't cut and paste your gratitude every day. It should be something special. To that day, tune into your internal guidance system. We talked about it. Yours might be angels. Yours might be your higher self. Yours might be. I see a video in my mind, don't know what it is of what I'm supposed to do. It doesn't matter what you call it, what is your guidance. And you know what you're gonna know when it's the right guidance. It feels loving, it feels good. It's never based in fear. That is just not the right channel you're tuning into. It's not based in fear. It's based in hope and love and compassion. You will feel a difference when you're tuning into the right, the right channel. Address what isn't working. That's the spiritual path. Don't keep doing what isn't working. You are co creating what's happening to you. Shift the me orientation to the we. I want to talk about this for a second. I have seen this so concretely in my life in the past two years. So I've been doing coaching for 15 years when I just give from my heart and stop worrying about who's going to sign up and how many people are coming. Like this, for instance. I threw it out there and 100 people have signed up. They're the right hundred people. And then I would like you to know before you ask your questions, I probably will put some portion or all of it on YouTube. So if you have questions you don't want to ask publicly, I would be aware of that. But I want to make, I just want, I just want to be of help. Now there are smart business practices when you are a coach. Yes, we have a sign up. Yes, we have a newsletter and things need to be signed up to because you need to build your list of people that want your things. So there's smart practices that we have to do. But you can still shift from the me to the we orientation. Connect from the heart. We've talked about that. Expand your compassion. You know, I interviewed Timothy Clark, as I said on my podcast, which is coming out in July, that, that episode. But my gosh, he's talking about how to create psychological safety in your business. Oh, so good. But when you listen to him, you know it's a spiritual, it's a spiritual grounding. He doesn't use those words because he deals with, he trains and goes into very big businesses and deals with the top leaders. So he's not going to talk the word spirituality, I doubt. But it's about everyone has worth. You must strip away your biases and your superiority. It's incredible. It's so powerful. So I can't wait to share that with you in July. But it is about expanding compassion. So think about where that's the hardest for you. For me, sometimes, you know, I'm, I take a very specific stand. I'm a liberal I'm a Democrat. Sometimes I get upset at the other side. I try to hold on to compassion and understanding and tolerance and patience and kindness every minute of the day. Not a saint, not an angel. So it doesn't work every day, but it helps me. And then it's time to take action. Action. Okay, so this is really about becoming the most powerful, positive version of you and illuminating the world with it. I'm saying you have a light and it's time to shine it. Boom. Oh, I love it. Laura, are you finally ready for an amazing life and business and truthfully, people, if not you, who? Who is going to do it? And if not now, when? When? I mean, my God, look at this time we're in. Now's the time. I mean, you might be thinking, no, it isn't. Look, I'm scared for money. Yeah, well, there's a time to plant the seeds. I always say this. Do what you must to stay afloat, but always plant the seeds for your future self. Today your future self is coming. It's not always going to be constrained and constricted and fear induced like today, our world. Plant the seeds. Plant the seeds. So which finding brave path speaks to you most? Choose one brave sight. Seeing myself powerfully brave speak. Communicating from strength, not fear. Brave ask who do I need to ask for help? Brave connection connecting to an incredible support community that will uplift you. Brave challenge which is. Stop it. Say stop. Where are you tolerating what you no longer want to tolerate? Brave service. How can you come forward and finally do the work you're meant to do? And brave healing? What do you need to heal from the past? Totally your time to shine. So I want to. Wow, look at. I wasn't running too far over. Woohoo. Fantastic. I want to take 20 minutes of questions. I only see one there. Please post. It is your time to shine people. This is your time. There's no time like now. It's time. And I want to give you some bonuses and some affordable things, some free things that I hope will really help. So if you find this useful and you say I want more, but I don't know how to do this and you want help. First of all, I'm happy to give you 20% off my closure power gaps. Six session private coaching program. Happy to do it. We focus all on these gaps. We look at what you want to do. Is it your career? Is it your small business? And we work on how do we get stronger, how do we get more powerful, how do we incorporate our spirit in our heart power. Now 20 is the coupon code that gets you 20% off. And you just click on that link Kathy caprio.com powergaps by May 15th and you get 20% off. I'm really excited about this. You know, talk about shifting from me to we. I have an amazing career project course. 16 weeks. It's got videos, homework. 16 videos, 16 homeworks. It's a Facebook group and it's me every week for 16 weeks that you know, because my time is of a premium right now that has a higher cost than just the video series. And a few months ago I said the heck with it. I want a million people to take this course. It's the video training. And so I put it up on the Udemy course platform. It's $13. That's what the cost is basically almost every day. Some days it goes up. Udemy kind of controls that price. But right now it's $13 and it's 16. Really powerful video training about the 16 steps you need to take to build an amazing career. That's the link. Bit ly. Bit ly. Udemy ACP. 125 students have taken it so far and it's a 5 star rating. It's the highest rating. Says highest rating there I think that you can get. So check that out. It's 13 bucks and there is a money back guarantee. So there you go. I want to also share with you that my book, the most powerful you7 bravery boosting past career Bliss is out for pre orders Now. It publishes July 28, but there's a pre order campaign. So that's the link we were having. We're creating a beautiful book site where there's some wonderful giveaways and of course it's not ready, but if you pre order, you can go. Go to the Amazon link, pre order and you send me your receipt. @infocathycaprino.com you will be entered into a draft drawing that gives away my succession career breakthrough program. That's a $3,000 value. One winner will be selected. You've got to do that by June 15th and if you order 10 copies. So let's say you work with women or you're in a women's group or you're in a book group. Now the book, the physical book isn't available till July 28, but we can pre order now if you pre order 10 copies, I'm so happy to give you a 20 minute free consultation. We can talk about anything you want. You know, typically people come to me for career help. For leadership help, for small business help. Okay, 20 minutes free for you. Again, same deal. You order 10 on Amazon, you send me that, send us that receipt and we will be back in touch to schedule that call. Also, you get, if you Pre order before June 15, you get a free My Power Boost Challenge workbook which draws on and synthesizes what the book is all about and gives it to you in a seven day challenge. Send us the receipt and you'll get that for free. I'll send it to you. All right, so folks, ready for questions? What did you take away here? I'd love to hear what is your biggest challenge and what are the key goals you have for the next six months? Now, you're not going to answer all that today, but I want you to think about this. So again, I don't want this to be a nice thing that then you put away. I think if you can keep coming back to it and answering these questions, you're going to move forward. There's where you can find me. There is a list of some resources. So I'm going to stop sharing my screen. And what I want to do is hear from, I want to take your questions. We got time. So let me go to the Q and A. This is from Abby. The T.S. eliot quote is so profound. That's why we need. That is so true. That is so true. Abby couldn't agree. We so need social connections. I mean so many of us are suffering, me included, not being able to connect in the way I want with my mother who I can't see, with my friends. I mean, I'm zooming right and left constantly. But that isn't the same, is it? It's not the same as getting a hug. Oh, thank you for sharing that. All right, Ellen, when you decided to become a coach and I'm reading these out loud for everybody, hope that's okay. Did you doubt, did you doubt to launch your coaching practice? Because you said to yourself there are so many different coaches and will I be unique? And what was the secret of your success as you clearly have achieved it? Aw, thanks, Ellen. I will be honest with you. Here's the story of that 18 year corporate career. Mess at the end, got laid off. And what I talk about, you know, which was a life changing conversation, is I was sitting in my therapist office a week after being laid off and I was crying because I had a big house we had just moved into a month before. I had two little kids. My husband then was a renowned jazz percussionist. But as we know, the music Industry is not as stable as we'd like. And I'm crying. And the therapist said, Dr. Henry Grayson, I know from where you sit this is the worst crisis you've ever faced. From where I sit, it's the first moment you can choose who you want to be in the world. Now who do you want to be? And I remember when you're very blocked and you've had 18 years of a miserable time, you don't know the answer to that. So I said, I don't know. I want to be you. And he said, we laughed and he said, what does that mean to you? And I said, I want to help people, not hurt people and be hurt. And he said in the conversation, you know, I've known you for two years. I think you'd make a great therapist. From that conversation, I pursued it. I interviewed at two universities. I enrolled, got a master's, became a therapist. But it became very clear to me as I set up a practice and I set up a practice with three people called Living in Harmony in Westport, Connecticut. As I was doing the work and even before, when I was in my internship, I wasn't enjoying the identity of it, the professional identity of it, what it was like rape, incest, pedophilia, suicidality, drug addiction. It was rough. And then I thought, What? I spent 30,000 on a master's and now I don't like this, what's wrong with me? But one of my friends said, have you ever thought of coaching? Mike Jaffe was his name. I said, I don't know what that is. So this is a long time ago. 2005, I graduated from my master's and I pursued it and I looked at it and I went, I think I kind of love this. And so I was a therapist at the same time and then got coaching training and I found that I loved it. But the truth is, I believe to this day it was because I was a therapist, that that's why I'm such a effective coach. Because what holds people back is deep. If we could change it in a half a second, we would change it. So to answer your question, Ellen, when I became a coach, I really thought, I'm going to rock this. Because I've had the 18 year corporate career, because I've gotten the masters in therapy, I thought I would rock it. I didn't have a confidence problem. The problem was to have a one on one coaching practice. I mean, it's not recommended now that all you do is one on one coaching, because in order to fill that Pipeline of clients. You have to be reaching millions of people. And what happened was I, you know, I didn't know how to do an online business. I came from traditional business. Digital was only just starting. So I didn't understand you have to do a lot more than one on one coaching. And I really had a little hubris, arrogance around. I'm a marketing person. I got this. Well, I didn't have it. So it was exhausting. It was draining. I couldn't fill the pipeline. It was rough. It was rough. And I didn't enjoy only doing one on one coaching. I love it. I have about 30 clients now. As I get very busy, I can only take about 20 at any given time. And many of them don't come every week. They, they come every two weeks or whatever. But for me to do five sessions a day, it's, it's tiring for me because it's like an energy healing kind of thing going on. So when it started to kick in was when I got help. I started launching the course. I launched other programs, other services. So there was a myriad of ways I was of help. That is what has made me successful. Writing, you know, writing on Forbes has gotten some, you know, has allowed me to connect with amazing people that then I become friends with or, or who support my work. So it was, it was stopping, just doing one on one coaching. It was all of it. Writer, speaker, trainer, educator. Does that answer your question? I hope that's helpful. Abby says it was Dorothy Doyle who said the T.S. eliot quote is so. Oh, I'm sorry Abby. I'm sorry about that. Oh, thanks Dorothy. I think you said that. Oh, sorry. Unless someone else has made. Oh, okay. Thanks Abby. I think that's you saying this right. Do me a favor if you're gonna. I love your comments, love them, but put those in the chat right now in the Q and A. What I'm looking for is questions that I can answer right here. I want to be your coach. I want to be your small business coach, your leadership coach, your entrepreneurial coach, your professional coach. Let me do that. Okay, so put your questions very specifically right in the Q and A and the rest can go in the chat. Oh, I love it. Laura Leslie, when reaching out to a connection, someone who can assist and help me, bring me bring to the next level or introduce me. What's the best way to ask what I'm asking for besides 100%. Can you give me a specific example? So let me just. I've done, I've done webinars and even A podcast about this. I think there's a right way to reach out to someone you don't know, and it is not to come with your handout. Don't do it. You have to build a relationship with this person. So, for instance, I hear from probably 10 to 30 people a week from, you know, I have a big following on LinkedIn. So I hear, hi, Kathy, I saw your thing. Do you think you could help me? It'll never go well that way because I don't know this person. And if you want help, you have to demonstrate your potential to this person. The way it goes really well. For instance, on LinkedIn, I hear from someone or, here's how. I've made a lot of friends on LinkedIn and I help them and they help me. They will quote something of mine and post it. Here's Kathy's podcast. Wow. Here's what I got out of it. They won't just post it, so it gets my attention. I can't stand it when people do. They tag 20 people. I mean, some of my friends do that now, my business friends. But some people do it just so that if a person with a big following responds, they get views. Don't do that. You know, post it and say, wow, that book was amazing, and here's why. Or that video or that. And if this person has a soul, that's not quite accurate, but if they like to connect, they will write back or write a comment. Thanks, Leslie. I appreciate that. Keep building, keep offering. And then when you get on that person's radar, then you can write them and you can say, I do have one question. Would you be open to me asking it? So there's got to be a lot of respect. Give first, but don't reach out to a complete stranger and say, I can't tell you how many people do that and they don't understand. Here's how to think of it. If you go to a cocktail party and you walk in, do you walk up to a group of people and go, hi, I'm Kathy. Would you help me build my business? Would you help me become an author? Who the heck are you? No, I don't know who you are. I hope that's helpful. But I do have other resources on and you can. Here's something that I hope is helpful. If you want to know. Have I written about anything on Forbes about these topics? You can type in Caprino, Forbes mentorship, Caprino, Forbes sponsorship, Caprino, Forbes Networking, and you will find all the Forbes posts on that topic that I've written Forbes is an awesome. You know you can just type Forbes Networking. They have a whole series and I was in that whole series. Go to Forbes for all of these questions. But if you type Caprino, Forbes Networking, Mentoring, you'll find all my posts and some of them are embedded with videos. I hope that's helpful. Okay. Jovian, Am I pronouncing that correctly? Hello. Hello. Do you have any suggestions for key questions? Reflection guides for new moms transitioning back to work but recognize their past work isn't how they spend their time? Well, great. I got it. You know what I would do? I would take the $13amazing career project video series. That's how you get on the path. I mean I would have to know a little more about your work. But what you always want to do when you want to make a pivot is first of all you got to do the work of identifying really clearly what are the amazing 20 facts of. You watch my TEDx talk for that you've got to be powerful about what you did before and then build a new story for what you want to move to. Do you know what you want to move to? If you have no idea, then I would take my amazing career project 16 module course. That's how I would do it all. Good because it walks you through these steps. It's not easy. Like you know, when I had an 18 year marketing career, I knew I didn't want to do marketing one more second for any corporate organization. But what to do, you don't just get an answer. It's a journey. So take my amazing career project. I think you're going to get the answers you to your questions by doing the modules and figuring yourself out and learning how to network. And you know, there's all sorts of cool ways you can even for instance when we're not social distancing, have a little dinner party with your friends all who want help with something and then you can even, you know, have them help you understand what are your talents that you're not recognizing and how could you pivot those. But I think the Amazing Career Project is your best bet for that. I'm not sure about my future goals. I've always enjoyed my life and been grateful. I took a couple of years off to do other things and now I would like to get back but I have no passion for what I did before. Okay, I have some ideas, but I'm not sure. All right, what I would have you do is start with taking my career path assessment. Here's why so many people want to Chuck what they did before, but they want to chuck it for the wrong reasons. And I can't tell you how many times. So I've worked with over 15,000 women in 15 years. So many times I would say maybe a 60%, if not higher, actually don't want to not do what they did before. They just don't want to do it the way they did it with the people they were doing it with, with the crappy leadership, with making no money. Sometimes we lose passion for something because we're not successful in it, but that's not why we should leave it. So take the career path assessment number one, to really understand. Number two. For instance, if you write down seven things you're interested in. Art therapy for the elderly, writing a book, running a bed and breakfast, I have a funny anecdote. I can't tell you how many people say to me, I want to chuck my marketing, chuck my finance, chuck my HR profession. I want to start a bed and breakfast in the amazing career project which I recommend everybody taking. There's five steps to how to get to an amazing life and career. Step back for an empowered perspective of who you are and what you've done. Number two, let go of the thinking patterns and behaviors that keep you stuck. Number three, say yes to your most compelling visions. Number four, try it on. And this is the one I'm talking about with you. Behaviorally, emotionally, financially. So if you think you want to do art therapy to the elderly, you've got to research it. Go look online. Passive and active research. Now, obviously we're not leaving our homes right now, but look at art therapists. What are they doing? What's their website? You know, what do they say? What's it like? What's their training? What training did they have to get? Go look at the masters in art therapy. Try it on. Then once we're out of the house, go shadow some art therapists. You've got to not just say, What I find is. And so the end of the bed and breakfast story is every single person who says, I want to run bed and breakfast. I really think I do. I say, okay, here's what you need to do. Go to three bed and breakfast in the next four weeks. Interview the owner. Can I ask you what the living reality of this life is like? Not one person, not one has come back and said, yeah, I want to write, run a bed and breakfast. They're like, what the heck? I don't want to do anything like that. But I learned I want to event plan or I want to build beautiful meals for people or I want to design spaces. So you need to try on the ideas you have and, and integrate what you learn. Learn, learn, learn, learn. That's how you figure it out, by trying it on. Oh, good, Laura, how can I find clients to start my new profession as a coach? Okay, Laura, that is a whole other webinar and I want to tell you this. I have a four part free video training on the six critical Cs to building a successful coaching business fast. Watch this video series and then there's a downloadable book. You can email me at infocathycapreno and I'll send it to you infocathycabrino.com There's a book that I wrote, the 10 Critical Mistakes New coaches Make. The way you get clients is not how you think. It's by offering thought leadership, doing a webinar in your area. It's by training something. It's by demonstrating your expertise. So here's the problem. And you know, just so you know, I have a coach certification program that teaches the amazing career project and I'll send you that page. You can look at it. It's not cheap, but it's incredibly in depth. What new coaches don't understand, and I gotta tell you, I got a bugaboo about it, they're not trained, they don't have. What my video series talks about is you must have a model for change about how you're gonna bring clients through to the end to the goal that they want. And you have to have worked that model for change and you have to talk about that model for change and demonstrate that you have this model for change. Because how it works as a coach or any new business is this. If someone wants a career coach for women, they're going to do a Google search. It used to be coaching was one on one live, you know, in person. So you'd go locally, now it isn't. Now it's global. So here's how it works. Someone goes, good grief, I need a career coach for women. They're going to Google career coach for women. Who comes up in the first two pages is who they're going to pursue. Because those people have thought leadership out there or assets or a following that demonstrates that they're great. You've got to get going. Demonstrating that because it's intended fiercely competitive. So what I would ask you to do is it's not, I wouldn't even phrase it that way. How do I find clients? I would say, what do you have going on? How well Trained, are you? How many clients have you had? How are you demonstrating your thought leadership? How are you demonstrating how you're different? And if you don't know how you're different, you have to figure out how you're different. It's not just going to happen. Especially now. When someone has $300, who are they going to go to? They're going to go to the person who, when they search Google or they're looking on LinkedIn and this person has a lot of views because they have a training video on coaching, they're going to go to that person. So I'm not saying you shouldn't be a coach. I'm saying you've got to understand what you're competing against and you got to get in the arena, get competing. Does that answer your question? Laura? But definitely write me and I'm going to send you that four part video training and the ebook the 10 most crippling mistakes New Coaches Make. Don't make those mistakes because you won't get out of the gate. Another thing I would consider is partnering, partnering with other people, not trying to hack it out alone. Because today we have to have a website. We have to, to have an e commerce site. You want a mailing list, you want to build. Here's another thing. Today people aren't going to plunk money down without knowing you. And they know you by you having a newsletter and sending great content every week. So you have to have a giveaway that's going to teach them something. They may never, you may never hear from them again. But it's a free giveaway, an ebook, little video. But it has to have value and it has to change them or help them right then in the moment. Then they'll stay on your list. Then you have to serve them. And the truth is in coaching and probably most businesses, you have to serve a hundred times more than you thought you had to before you see a dollar. I hope that's helpful. I don't mean to say this to discourage you. I mean to say it so that we look eyes wide open about what the challenges are that we are facing and how do we navigate through them in Rock Resume Resources Kathy, do a Google search. Caprino Forbes resume. You're going to see everything I've done there. A person I would have you look at is Austin Belchak. His website is cultivatedculture.com But Duke, I've interviewed him on my podcast. Look at my podcast finding brave.org find Austin. He's amazing for resumes. Recently furloughed wow, I'd love to help you, Kathy. Let me know if I can. Arsha, I hope I'm pronouncing your names. I think I can take two more questions. Number one here, brave challenge, is what I'm taking along. How do I apply that to society? Oh, that's going to be interesting. I want to unplug traditional learning, teach children Gen Z not knowledge, but develop emotional abilities so they can survive. But again and again, I'm blocked by law, government, even parents. What that says to me, Arsha, am I pronouncing that right? Is you're doing something that is creating resistance. We gotta help you figure out how to do what you want without getting resistance. When the world is ready for something, it flows, it flies. Government shouldn't be involved in what you're doing. Like I'm teaching whatever I want. I don't have government involvement. Who else is pushing back law. Nobody should be pushing back on what you said. I want to unplug traditional learning. I mean, it's. This is really a great question because often when you can't, when you're blocked at putting something forward, it's not that you don't have something valuable, you're just putting it out in the wrong way. Trust me on this. You put it out in the wrong way and you're going to get hate, you're going to get pushback, you're going to get stuff. When you're putting it out in the right way, it's going to have a life of its own and you're not going to have pushback. So I think we need to work together or take the amazing career project first. Marsha. But there's something that's happening here that you can bypass or navigate around if you change. You know, like parents stuck in their outdated mindset. That used to be my world. I would be a marriage and family therapist talking to parents, and I'm dealing with pedophiles. I'm dealing with people that have abused their children. But here's something to know. You absolutely cannot help people if you're coming from a place of judgment. And I think that this is true here. Don't judge, don't criticize, don't tear down because people can't hear you and they can't connect with it. So I learned that in therapy that truly the only way you can help someone is if you're coming with compassion and love. That's how you do it. So I'd love to help you, but something's happening here that causing resistance. Anita hello my dear Anita, I didn't see you there. Can you remind us when your book becomes available? Oh, thank you my dear Anita. It's available now for pre order and again at the end of this. I don't know if you saw that there's a lot of pre, a number of pre order bonuses, a free workbook, a drawing for anyone who orders now before June 15th. So it's on Amazon. You can pre order now and we're gonna push it. Pre orders are fun because we'd love to see, you know, what am I hoping for. I'm gonna leave you with this. Thanks so much Anita. I was talking to both my agent and my PR person for the book and they said the PR guy, Mark Fortier, who I adore, the best PR business, business book, PR person in the world said what do you want from this book? Years ago I would have said very specifically I want a best selling book. I want this. I'd love people to come to me, you know what I said? I want this to reach a million people and I want it to help. That's it. That's the goal and I'm not gonna muck it up with all my how it has to look and what has to happen. Just universe let it help people. Let a million people have it. I've learned a lot and I've learned these lessons and continue to learn them. When we overly attach and when it's all about me, it just won't go. What goes is I want to be of help. So my friends, I hope you found that helpful. I would love you to share with me privately or on social what you got out of this. And and really I want to leave you with. It's time for action now. It's time to not wait anymore. It's time to come forward from your spirit, from your heart, from your beautiful values, from your intense sense of worth because you are so worthy of being helpful in the world and my goodness, doesn't the world need it? So I really hope and pray you found this of interest and it was what you wanted and needed. Let me know again if you need, you know, have any questions about follow up infocathycaprino.com, email me there and I hope you will buy my book because boy there's a lot in there and 30 plus national experts on critical topics for women's success. So I hope you found this helpful. I'm sending love to you. Thank you for being here with me. And again, stay tuned for later today or early tomorrow where we're going to send everybody who registered the training slides and the video and audio. I hope it was helpful. Let me hear from you. And here's to shining that gorgeous light of yours in the world. Bye now. Be safe.