What To Do If You Hate Your Career But Don't Know What Else To Do

Hello, everybody. Kathy Caprino here. I'm sorry for that delay. My Internet connection. Oh, yay. It says yay, you're broadcasting. My Internet connection flaked out and I couldn't go live, but here I am. And I'm sorry for the grainy color. I'm gonna get a new bulb to my media lamp, which is gonna be much better next week. All right, we are talking about what to do when you hate your job or career but don't know what else to do. So I want to tell you I posted on LinkedIn and Facebook. Okay, folks, send me your questions and I'll choose one from what I hear to cover today. And I have to say this is the question I hear, I would say thousands of times a year in different forms, but it usually goes like, Kathy, I hate what I'm doing. I'm an engineer, I'm a graphic designer, I'm a teacher, I'm whatever it is. But I'm 40 and I don't know what else to do or I don't know how to leverage my skills, you know. So I heard that, you know, quite a few times in the past two days. So that's what we're going to talk about. Nine of you are here. How awesome. What I'd love you to do is post your questions. I'm going to leave some time, 10 minutes or so and definitely give me a thumbs up when I'm saying something that resonates with you because it's hard to talk right into it camera without people. So if you do that, I know you're listening, I know it's resonating and so that'll be really helpful for me. Okay? So let's talk about again. I don't, I hate my job or I hate my career, but I don't know what else to do. So I'm going to tell you what not to do and then what to do. All, all in 20 minutes. So the first thing I see, and this is based on working with know over 11,000 people. Yay. Hi. Is it Jean? Hi, Jean. Awesome. Fantastic. So, Jean, I'm gonna present what I can and then you come back with your question. Okay, thanks for being here. So here's what people do wrong. And I see this over and over and again. I've worked with thousands of people in every walk of life, in every, in every field, in every level, high level beginners, emerging leaders. So this pertains to everybody, I think. First of all, here's what people do. Okay, Kathy, I've been a teacher for 22 years and I'm done. But what else can I do? So what you do not want to do is throw the baby out with the bathwater. Let me tell you what I mean. There's a reason. You've been doing something for 20 years. There's a reason. And it's not all, gosh, I ended up here and I hate it. There's a reason. So what you need to do is understand. Exactly. Look back throughout your entire career trajectory and you need to understand in every job, what did I love, what did I hate, what do I never want to do again? And what do I want to bring forward? So the best way to do this, and I'm going to give you resources and tools that I've created and other people have created, is my career path assessment. I'll include a link at the bottom of this. It's an 11 page survey of questions, vital questions that every professional should answer before they make one move or one decision. If I had answered these questions, I would have not made the mistakes I made in my career. And I made some big ones. So what you want to do, and let me talk about that for a minute. So something like 70,000 people have downloaded this career path assessment. I personally viewed thousands of them. And what I see over and over is people will list their 10 jobs or 15 jobs or five jobs, what they love, what they hated, what they rated out of a scale of 1 to 10, and let's say they love a job, but it was seven years ago and they gave it a nine. They forget that if they're in a job, a toxic job that they hate now. They forget that seven years ago they were rocking it as a consultant or that job they really loved or that job that you know, made a difference for them in their lives or helped them feel like they were making an impact. You don't want to throw the baby out with the bathwater. You want to mine all of that for what you're talented at, what you're skilled at. And those are two different things. What you want to do to build a really happy career is leverage the natural talents you have, not the hard skills that you can't stand to use, but you're good at. You want to leverage the natural skills and abilities and find a way to monetize that. So take the career path assessment and answer these questions. Every job you ever had, what you loved, hated, what you want to bring forward, what you don't want to forget that you did. So I'm going to give you a specific Example, in terms of my career, I hope this is helpful. I was an English major. I loved books, I loved ideas, and I was a writer. And I spent some time at MIT radio news station when I interned in college. So you'd think I would have thought I probably could be a media person. Never occurred to me. I got the first job I could get out of college and that was a job I should never have taken. It was a marketing job in science publishing. I didn't want marketing. I wanted to work for Random House or Simon and Schuster. I wanted to be an editor. But no, I took the first job because I was worried about money. And it was a marketing job and I was good at it. I could write copy about spectroscopy, about anything scientific. Somehow I could write great copy and market these books. So there I went, five years into that. You know, I started in a small science publisher, then I worked at Cambridge University Press, all doing marketing for science books until I realized, what am I doing? I don't like this. So you can be great at something you don't like. Then I took a job in developing new products and that turned into 11 years. And some of it I loved. There was a stint doing market research and I happened to realize I loved market research. So you don't want to throw that baby out. That was great. Then I had lots of different jobs in between, but in the end I was a vice president managing very large membership service products. I didn't like it. I didn't like it for one second. So why I'm sharing that with you is there were pieces of that whole 18 year trajectory that are me today. Marketing, copywriting, managing, administrating, leading, developing new products. Right? Promotion. So why would I ever say, good Lord, I don't want anything to do with that? But I did because it was toxic. In the end, I was chronically ill. There was discrimination, there was sexual harassment. It was a mess. Narcissistic boss. So the very first thing is, do not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Understand what your gifts and talents are and figure out how to leverage them. And now you're going to ask, okay, Kathy, but how do I do that? So question number two that I want you to ask yourself is understand what you're hating when you say, I just hate it. I hate my job. I hate my engineering job, I hate my job. I have three physicians who are clients right now. And some of what they do, they love, some of what they do, they hate. You've got to tease apart what you hate. So let me Give you some tips if. When I say to you, why do you hate your job? And if you talk about these things, I know it's not the job, it's not the career you don't like. It's the particular situation of your job. So if you have a toxic boss, if you have chronically miserable colleagues who are always backstabbing, if you're hyperconnected 247 and can't stop and you have no balance and no flexibility, if you're not in control of your time, if you don't like the people that you work with, that is not necessarily your career. That's job specific. So before you chuck the whole thing out and say, that's it, I don't want to be an engineer, I don't want to be a marketing person, I don't want to be in finance, do the work to figure out, is it a new job you need, a new environment you need, or is it a new career? And I'm going to tell you one other thing. There's a book I think everybody on the planet should read. It's Dr. Maria Nemeth's book, the Energy of Money. It's a guidebook for life. But, you know, its whole premise foundation is what is your relationship with money? And I want to tell you, your relationship with money shapes everything having to do with your professional life. And that's why so many people say, you know, I volunteered doing this, but when I got a job doing it, I hated it. Yeah, very different. Because you're negotiating your value in terms of monetary. Monetary equivalent. And for many women, that's really hard. Okay, what am I saying? Ah. So the book. So she talks about Maria Nemeth in the Energy of Money, that there are six key energy forms in life. Money, time, physical vitality, enjoyment, creativity, and support of others. There go my glasses. Rats. Hang on. So how you do one of those is probably how you do a lot of them. So if you chronically have terrible bosses, mean colleagues, if you constantly have narcissism around you, if you can't speak up for yourself, if you're not being valued, if you're not making the money you need. Gonna get to all your questions. Thank you. Keep sharing them. Then I'm gonna go back and answer them. That's not necessarily about your career. That's about you. I know because I had so many problems and issues, and if you've watched any of my videos, which I hope you do, watch all of them, you know, a lot of it was because I couldn't speak up for myself. I didn't have appropriate boundaries. Now I do. If someone steps on me, you know, I have my own business, so I can do whatever I want in that way. If someone is narcissistic to me and is a client, uh, no way. And you know, I've just had to deal with that, you know, this week. You're not going to treat me like that. That's going to end. So we have to be able to know how to speak up for ourselves, how to advocate. A lot of people say to me, I want to raise, I had a client the other day, you know, I want to make another $60,000 or $100,000. What you want is irrelevant. It's what you deserve. And the way you present that case, we all want more money. It's what are you going to go? What are you going to do to get it? And why do you deserve it? And you have to do research about that. What's the competitive salary? What do people at my level making in 50 different companies, right? What have I done for the company that warrants me making $50,000 more? It's not what you want. You got to make a case for it. So all of this stuff is about you, how you are operating in the world, how you are engaging with other people, how much you can talk, speak up for yourself. So if you struggle with that speaking up, check out my TEDx talk time to brave up. It's all about how women are scared to advocate for themselves. They are scared to sound like braggarts. I have people making, I'm not kidding, $500,000 and they're still scared to speak up for themselves for more money or more leadership, right? This is something you have to change in yourself. So look at these six energy forms. Money, time, physical vitality, enjoyment, creativity and support. I guarantee you if you struggle with money, you struggle with these other things. Maybe not all of them, but most of them. And that's something you're gonna have to shift. So I'm gonna tell you how to do that in a minute. It's a lifelong journey. It's not an overnight thing. So I'll talk about that in a minute. The third thing, I hate my job, but what do I want? You also have to understand every aspect of who you are. What are your values? What are your non negotiables? What do you want for your family life? What are your financial goals? What's your risk tolerance? I've had clients who say, you know, that's it, I'm done with corporate life. I Want to start my own business. But they have zero risk tolerance. You can't be successful in entrepreneurship or consulting if you hate risk. If you can't stand it, if it makes you throw up, then you're not gonna. It's not gonna work. So you have to understand everything about who you are. Okay? And then you have to honor that. Now, yes, you can shift. You know, when I was in the corporate world, I was not terribly risk embracing. And then when I decided after my brutal layoff, that's it, I'm done. I am going to take control of my life and launch my therapy and coaching, practice and business. I have learned how to embrace risk, how to take smart risk. You really can't succeed if you don't want to take any risk at all. So you can change some of this, but if you know for a fact it's just going to make you too scared and too sick and you'll be up all night and your anxiety and high blood pressure will be terrible, then entrepreneurship is probably not for you. Okay? So you have to understand who you are. My career path assessment will help you do that. Okay. Finally, I want to talk about how am I doing with time? Okay. I want you to realize that what you fantasize about, your dream job is not necessarily going to be a good fit for you. So let me explain this. A lot of people have heard me say I'm a singer. I've always been a singer. I've gotten paid to be a singer. I've been on some records, I've sung at Sony Studios, I've sung at Carnegie hall at the un. But I do not want to make my living as a singer. So how do I know that? Because when I started singing a little more or singing at weddings, singing in a band or two, the whole thing lost enjoyment for me. Whereas other people, all they want to do is make money in music. You've got to understand that if you fantasize. Here's another example. I use this a lot. I had a client who said, I think I want to start a bed and breakfast. I've been working as a project manager. But you know, I have great aesthetic, a great aesthetic sense. You know, I'm a great chef. I think I want to start a bed and breakfast. So as she shared why it sounded totally legit, made sense, I said, here's what I want you to do. Go try it on. Try it on. So I said, go to five bed and breakfasts in the next three to four months and interview the owner and stay there and Watch what the working identity of this dream job is. She came back and said, oh, my gosh, I don't ever want to run or start a bed and breakfast. What she realized is she wanted to create experiences for people. She didn't want to be tied to a physical building and run, run a bed and breakfast. So many people make the mistake of leaping. They either leap out of their hideous corporate job and get a master's, and then three years later, they're like, I don't even like this. What am I doing? So that if you watched any of my videos know, I call that the pendulum effect, where we're so unhappy. Here we go. Swing to the other side of the universe. Only five years later to wake up and say, oh, my gosh, I have the same challenges I had five years ago, but in a bed and breakfast or whatever. So often what you fantasize about is not the identity that you really want. I'll give you another example. When I got laid off from my corporate life, one week later, I'm with my therapist. You know this story. If you watch my TEDx talk, you'll see it. I'm crying in my therapist's office. And he said, I know from where you sit, this is the worst crisis you've ever faced. But from where I sit, it's the first moment you can choose who you want to be in the world. Now, who do you want to be? And from that conversation, he said. I said, I don't know. I just don't want to hurt and be hurt anymore. From that conversation, he said, does this resonate with you? Are you tired of being hurt? Are you tired of hurting others? Are you tired of being a lousy leader? Are you tired of not living up to your potential? And he said, I've known you for several years now. I think you'd make a great therapist. That was the conversation. That was the fateful moment I went home. I researched it, but I didn't try it on. I researched. I interviewed at three different schools, chose the one, took three courses, jumped in to get the masters. The thing I did not do is I didn't try it on. I interviewed a few therapists who were making over $100,000. They didn't have to take insurance. They were rocking it, and it was fantastic. But that's not the. That's not the average or the typical therapist life. There are many other identities that aren't like that. So I got the masters, loved it. Then I hit internship, and it was rape, incest, pedophilia, Drug addiction, suicidality. And there were other things that I did not like about it. I didn't feel like I could be a pioneer on the frontier of therapy. And I really wanted to be a pioneer and develop new programs and what. Bring new solutions to the table. And then I found coaching and writing and speaking and training. So I want you to realize that what you fantasize about is a fantastic first sign. But what you want to do is look at, why do I fantasize about it? Why do I think it's going to be the right thing for me? And then you have to try it on. Physically, emotionally, behaviorally, financially and spiritually. You gotta find a way. So in that case, I should have interviewed 20, 20 different therapists who were at every different stage and every different walk, not just two therapists who were making 100 grand and it was easy. And they'd been doing it 20 years and they were authors and thought leaders. No, you know, that would have taken me 20 years to achieve. So you need to try it on. You need to volunteer. But understand, volunteering is not the same as making a living at it. You need to shadow people, interview people, understand what that living identity is. You know, I'm going to be honest in my therapy practice, you know, I would have to be called. I never had to go on the stand, but I have been deposed about, you know, which parent should get the children. I've had to think about, do I have to call DCF and have these children removed from this abuse? It's tough stuff. It's not sitting around helping people. That's one piece of it. It's a million other things. And I'm not trying to discourage you, but I want you to look at these things with eyes wide open. So if you want to sing in a band, or you want to be a baker, or you want to start a bed and breakfast, or you think social media marketing is fun, but you don't know what it's like to be a social media marketer. You got to try it on. You got to try it on. So how do we do all this? I want to say this to you and I. You know me enough. I hope you know me well enough. I try to put out so much free content so that you can just run with it. But in this case, I'm going to tell you this. You can't do this by yourself. You cannot do this by yourself. So you either need to find a mentor who can be with you and your accountability buddy all along the way as you make all these steps or you need a coach or you need some form of a structure. And I'm going to tell you two things. If you're interested in coaching, check out my website, Kathy Caprino.com coaching services. And if you don't want to coach and you don't want to have someone who's physically in your life, who you're meeting with, there are other ways to do it. So another way is my amazing career project course. I only do that two times a year and we're already, I think, on week nine of the 16 weeks. So that course is only available spring and fall. Yeah, spring and fall. But I have the video series that the course is based on that you can take now. And it walks you through these 16 steps of changing who you are in the world. That is how you change careers. Because you'd already be in an amazing career if you were ready for it. There's blocks, there's fears, there's anxieties, there's blind spots, there's stuff you got to do. So if you're interested in that, check out AmazingCareerProject.com video series. And for folks that really want the course but can't wait, take the video series. And then the price of the course when it's open will be discounted by the amount that you pay for the series. So I know I've thrown a lot at you. What I want to do is take questions. Okay, how do we do this? How do we figure out why I hate what I hate and what I'm going to love and how do I make the change? Okay, let's answer some questions here. So Jean says that's where I am considering. I need to go back to school to get the experience I need to get the career I've seen myself in. So Jean, be careful because I. What I hear from more is people that got higher education, a master's or a PhD or got and are unhappy that they did it. So just be very careful. And how do you be careful? Whatever you did say education, right? Yeah. Whatever schooling you think you want, make sure that there's a clear pathway after that to a job that you want. So don't just say like for me, I adored every, literally every minute of my three year master's, but I did not adore the work of being a therapist. So what you want to make sure to do is make sure that that education and the investment that you're spending on that is going to yield you what you really want. Sometimes you can just get shorter certification that's $1,000, not $30,000. You need to do research to make sure that, number one, the schooling you're going to get is what you want. And after the schooling, you're going to be in the position that you want to be. And I hope that's helpful. Leah. Hi, Leah. I actually left a PhD program that was made. Yeah. Now, I'm not saying everybody, but that's the people I hear from. Shoot. I got on the path to higher education and I hate it. What do I do now? So thank you for sharing that, Leah. I appreciate that. Danielle. Hi. I think I didn't find something I really have a passion for. Okay, let me talk to you about passion. There's so much to say. Everybody wants a calling. Everybody wants passion. The thing is, I want to tell you this. A job is not a calling. They're very different. And what I hear is a lot of people are deceiving themselves, thinking I can get a great job, make 100,000, a steady paycheck, great benefits, and it'll be a calling. They're not the same. I'm not saying. You're saying they are, Danielle. But what people don't understand is when you pursue a passion, it wreaks havoc on your life. Sometimes a calling, and I'm going to equate that with a passion is so compelling, you wrap your entire entity around it. And that's hard. That's hard on your health, hard on your checkbook, hard on your marriage. You know, so. So many people say, I want the passion that you have or that Kathy has, but they don't understand what. What you give up to pursue that passion. So I'd ask you to think about, is it really passion that you want or just a more exciting job? Are you really ready to do what it takes to pursue passion? There's a tough question for you, but if you are, what you want to do is take my career path assessment and figure out what have you always been great at? What have you always cared about? If you're on your deathbed and you've got a year to live and you can make a difference in the world, what would that difference be? Who would you help? Who would you advocate for? For me, after my 18 year, really troubled corporate career because I got discriminated against and biased and passed over, and it was rough. I came out of there saying, I want to help women. That's what I want, to help professional women. That's my passion. I wrote the book Breakdown breakthrough after interviewing 100 women about how they overcame Professional crisis. That became my passion. I don't want to leave this earth without providing solutions for women. A lot of people, men. Write me. How come you only focus on women? And, you know, I do have some wonderful male clients. Some wonderful male. Some wonderful male course members. But my sweet spot, and I'm not ashamed of it, is helping women. Because women have a long way to go about pursuing their passion, gender equality, being able to speak up for themselves. Because we're culturally trained not to. We have a long way to go. So that's it, Danielle. So something that you really enjoy every day? Do the work. Take my career path assessment. Start figuring out what have you always loved to do? What were you known for as a child? What did you love? What made time fly? You got to do the work. It's not going to fall in your lap. Okay. Will you take my career path assessment? It's Kathy Caprino.com free assessment. Take it, fill it out. And if you need help, you know where I am. I'm reading your book, Jean. Oh, that's so great. Thank you so much. All right, who else? I really appreciate that. My book is Breakdown breakthrough, about the 12 hidden crises that working women face and how we overcome them. Who's got more questions? Oh, you're welcome, Danielle. Thank you. Who's got more questions about. Ugh, I hate my job. I hate my career, but what am I gonna do? Any more questions? I'm sorry, I keep getting texts. No, one more. One more question. Maybe there's some. Let me go back. Is that Yolanta? What a beautiful name. Your advice has totally changed my view of work and helped me to find the most uplifting. Wow. I can also rec. Oh, Barbara Scher. Yes, I interviewed Barbara, I believe, years ago. I could do anything if I only. Yes, I had her book on my shelf until I packed up some books recently. Thank you for that. Wonderful. She's fantastic. You know, also, folks, follow my blog on Forbes. It's called Career Bliss. Just type in Forbes, Kathy Caprino. I interview people that are rocking it. Today I'm publishing an interview about a presidential advisor, former presidential advisor and ambassador, Susan Johnson Cook. Your socks will be blown off by what people are doing. And this is about how to pursue your big dreams against all odds. It's unbelievable. So follow that. Follow my LinkedIn blog as well, please, and let me know how you're going, how you're doing. Okay, let me see what else we have here. Oh, yeah, Danielle. It's a career path assessment and it's my website. Kathy Caprino.com free assessment, but I will definitely link to it at the bottom of this after I publish this. Okay, Natalie, you got laid off. All right? You don't know what to do. So listen to this whole video. Take my career path assessment. Understand what you've been great at, what you've loved to do. Don't throw the baby out with the bath water. A lot of people when they're laid off are devastated. I was for years. You don't understand that often, most often, a layoff is a sign that there's something better for you, even if it's devastating, Even if you didn't expect it, which I didn't. It was devastating for me. I mean, I was depressed. My gosh, had that not happened, I would not be who I am today. It was such a blessing. So if you can also, these are mindsets. I did a post recently, six positive mindsets that help your dreams soar. Don't break yourself against what happens. There's a reason I believe this. My beloved sister says, oh, I don't know, that everything always works out. I believe that everything always works out. But you have to be at the. You have to see the long arc of life to see that. And I'm in people's lives for years, so I see that when they were first devastated and they couldn't pick themselves up, but then they went through change. They are so thankful that they went through this challenge, believe me. So you'll figure it out. Do what I'm talking about in the. In this video. Okay. Can we email you? Hi, Leah. The answers from your TED Talk. I love that. So here's the deal. I'll be completely transparent. I can only take 10 clients at a time, private clients, and I can't. So many people reach out for free help. I can't give you free help. And that's why I do a video a week. And, you know, I do something like, you know, it's 1500 words a post, and I do six to ten posts a month, so that's 15,000 words a month. So that's my way of giving free help. So I would love to help you, but you'd have to become a client for me to really spend time with you and give you the advice and tailored help that you need. A lot of people will just fire off some advice that can be very bad advice. Imagine going to a doctor. They spend one minute with you and say, yeah, you have hepatitis C. The doctor has to diagnose and really understand you deeply. So check out my coaching okay, I have 1 session, 4 session, 10 sessions and my new 12 session. Brave up Life mastery. Okay. All right. Natalie, they told me I did nothing wrong. Well, that's a good thing. Natalie, watch this video. It's going to help you. Okay. All right. I'm sorry. You're going to figure this out. You are going to figure this out. There's a reason you've been separated from this job. I bet it's time to brave up and really do what you really want to do. Did you adore the job, Natalie? Was it the dream job? Okay. Probably not. So this is your time. Okay, what else we have here? Ah, Jean, No. The Career Success is a quiz. The Career Success readiness. This is an 11 page survey. You don't get an answer from me. It's 11 pages of deep, probing questions that if you really answer them and really look at what your answers are, you will move forward. It's not something you know you're not going to get a score. It's for you to understand yourself. How do you build. Oh, I love these questions. How are we doing with time? Five more minutes. How do you build the inner confidence to talk yourself into doing better? How to motivate yourself after being at the bottom of the career ladder? So you don't just do this by yourself. You know, I have. There are five steps to changing your life. Step back for an empowered perspective of who you are. You. You cannot do that by yourself. You can't just sit at your computer, in your office, in your bedroom and try to think better thoughts. You need help. Sometimes people need therapeutic help. Sometimes people need energetic healing. I've had it all. And sometimes people need coaching or a mentor or a sponsor. But you cannot do this by yourself. And the reason for this is, Ursula. I work with thousands of people who are adult children of narcissists or had emotional manipulation in their childhood or didn't have the self esteem or self confidence nurtured in them. So when a bad negative thing in their mind happens, they're flattened. That doesn't change overnight. Sometimes we need therapy. Sometimes we need to look at. Why do I feel like this? Why am I so depressed by this? Why does this make me feel so horrible about myself? So you don't just do this on your own. You need help. You need support. And you know, when I say therapy is required or needed or helpful, there's no stigma in my mind in other cultures, you know, you got to be crazy to go to a therapist. I had three years of spiritual psychotherapy. I then had A three year master's in therapy and then I did conducted therapy for years. I love it. To me, everybody needs a therapist at one point in their life or another and most people need it now. So you need help. Let me see if I can answer that in any other way. Yeah. If you've been at the bottom of the career ladder, there's a reason for that. It's probably how you view yourself. It's probably about how you view yourself. So if this resonates with you, let me know and I'd love to coach you about it. I'm so depressed. I don't know if I have dreams. Okay. Yeah, depression, Let me tell you this. You can't have a great life and a great career if you're depressed. You got to get help with your depression. Depression, I can literally, I don't diagnose any longer. I'm not a therapist, I don't practice therapy any longer. But in five minutes of speaking with someone, I can sense if what they've got going on is depression. Depending on. Because depression sounds different. Depression has an energy to it and it has certain words to it. And usually when I say, is it possible that you're suffering from depression? 99% of the time they are. But some people, they've had it so long, they don't recognize it. They don't recognize there's a different way to be. If you have depression that requires and will be helped by therapeutic support. Okay. Oh my gosh. This is great. Awesome. Leah. Oh, thank you everyone. Hi, Alexandra. Thank you for being here. All right, I got one more minute. I feel like the best job is when I strongly feel growth, validation, impact, interaction, basically recognition. Oh, is it possible? Do you mean is it possible for you to have it? Why not? You know, again, check out my Forbes post. Six positive mindsets that I think it's that give your big dream its biggest chance to soar. People that do amazing things in the world don't ask, why me? Why me? Why should I have that? They ask, why not me? Why shouldn't I have that? Why shouldn't you have growth, validation, impact, interaction? What? I would say that word recognition tells me something. People that never get the recognition they deserve, it's almost always a childhood thing. They weren't recognized, they weren't validated, Their self esteem was crushed. Because if not, if they had been recognized and validated, then they expect it. They demand it. Not in an awful aggressive way. They just, you know, they just. That's part of how they look at life. Why wouldn't I be recognized? Why wouldn't I be loved? Why wouldn't I be valued? It's people that have chronically not been valued. And that starts in childhood. That is what keeps us from having it. Alexandra, does that resonate with you? Let me know. Wow, Jean, I'm so glad. You know, it's not really that I'm psychic, although, you know, I get this stuff right a lot. And I do feel truly that I have an energetic connection. Yep, Alexander. With everybody I'm talking to, but. And so when I get on the phone with someone, I can literally feel what has happened to you. And I don't mean to woo, woo you out, but I sometimes even see a video in my mind about what's happened and what's going on. And when we work together, I give you a five minute brain dump of what I see in your career path assessment and what I sense is going on. And most everybody says, yeah, oh my gosh, you nailed it. But really, you don't have to be psychic to do that. After you work with this many people, you see that the problems people have are universal. Millions of people have them and they all look alike. Now, everybody's individual in how they manifest their problems and challenges. But these are universal human challenges. So, folks, I got a scoot, got a client. This is my longest video. I hope this is helpful. I'm going to post this everywhere. It's going on YouTube. All of these are by the end of the month going to be on my website, Kathy Caprino.com but please comment, please comment here on Facebook, comment on YouTube, share it with your friends. There are millions of people, something like 80, what is it, 82% of the global employee workforce is disengaged with their work. So many people. And I wonder how we got there. How did we all end up hating our work? Not all. Many of us don't. Thank you for joining. I hope it was helpful. Oh, Jean, that's so beautiful. Thank you. You're beautiful too. And join me next week, Tuesday at noon. Thanks, everybody. Bye now.