Episode #559 - Making Dreams Into Reality with Trivinia Barber

Welcome to this edition of the Million Dollar Mastermind podcast. This is where we pick the brains of high achievers from all walks of life and get their hard earned real world insights on winning. I'm your host, Larry Wydell.

I've got a friend and, well, he's in Tampa now, but he was in, you know, lived his entire career out in Pasadena. And he used to always say when he, he tells his staff, he said, you have one reason for living and that is to make my life easier. That's our starting point. Because the idea, the more, more things you can take off the plate of the person who's got the oversight role, the more they can keep an eye on the whole project and the timing and spacing and think about creative things moving forward. So there's ways you can do that and you figured that out. So why the momentum word?

Because I think that what a lot of people look for when they're looking for support is they're just looking to get their head above water. They want to, they make it about their email, they make it about their calendar, the, the things that are falling through the cracks and all of those things are important, but we can throw tools and we throw systems and we throw bodies, frankly, at that conversation. But it's just deeper. It is about leverage and speed and calm. And so what I want is not people keeping treading water and just feeling less buried. I want them up and out and getting traction and making momentum toward whatever their life changing impact is, whether that's a product or a service or coaching or whatever it is that they do. They can't do that when they're just barely keeping their head above water. And that's what most people aim for. And we just want to change that.

When you look back on your life, it's hard to get successful people to talk about their successes because usually you're talking about the team and this, that and the other and you don't want to feel like you're a bragger. So it's very hard to get high achievers to talk about themselves because the other thing is, you said, I didn't do anything. Anybody could do what I'm doing, but really no, otherwise there'd be more people like you. And my thing is to put the spotlight on high achievers because we need more, you know, we. In fact, the purpose behind my book that I wrote, Serial Winner, is the fact that most people want to do something great and a lot of people almost do something great. What we need is more people doing something great. And that's why I wrote my book. It's like, we just need more doers. That is the title of your podcast. But before we get to that, what have you done? And as a result of your road, your career, that has given you the most biggest feedback and kind of confidence thing or recognition that you want, that you're the proudest of and maybe the surprise. Most surprised by.

Yeah, the one that stands out to me the most, and it's actually rather simple, but it's pretty profound, is that we had a gentleman who was an entrepreneur, and he had a multiple seven figure business. And I was at a charity event with him, and he was sitting over in the corner, and you could see sort of the glow of his phone at him. And I walked up to him because I happened to have known him, and I was like, hey, what's up, buddy? What are you doing? And he's like, hold on one second, you know? And he's. He's texting away or doing whatever he was doing. And I was like, okay, put your phone down. Like, this is not phone time, my friend. And he said, damn customer service emails. And I said, are you kidding me? Like, you are the CEO of a very, very big company that everyone would know if I said what it was like, why are you answering customer service emails? And he's like, because I'm the only one to do it, man. And I was like, you're killing me. And so that stood out to me as this is why the work that I do matters. Right? And it took two and a half years to get that man to pull the trigger. And here's how he ended up pulling the trigger on getting an assistant for himself. He was on vacation with some very wealthy friends, and there was some weather wherever they were, and the family that they were with, that person's assistant was real time, changing their flights, their itinerary, all of these things right? As a result of this weather. And he was like, your assistant does that. And literally, from the boat that they were on, he messaged me and he said, I'm ready. And I was like, all right, let's go. So that stands out to me is that even the best of the best with massively successful companies can still feel alone and stuck and afraid and feeling like they have to do it all themselves. So that stands out to me. And then I'd say the second thing that really showed me that what I was doing made an impact. Another entrepreneur, multiple seven figure business. And he said during a sort of testimonial to me, he said, you know, I thought I was getting someone to handle my email and my calendar. And what they did was they saved my marriage. They brought back date night for me and that showed me that this is so much more than itineraries and calendars and responding to emails as a gatekeeper, I mean is literally can be the failure or success of a marriage that's falling apart.

Absolutely. You know, it's, you know, it's the thing when you get clear of this because immediately obvious, you know, burning the candle at both ends, all, all of those things is like, how dumb was I? But you fall into that because you ramp up your activity. And I remember one time I started an expansion project up in North Carolina and the second year it took off like a rocket ship. And you know, I had all this stuff going to my mind, but it's like, gotta go home for dinner, you know, so like I went home and it's like, let's go, let's go get something, you know. And so I had like a see at the time, maybe a four and a six year old son and my wife and she followed me with them in the car and so I went to the house, got them and they followed me. It's like a six minute drive to the office. But we got up to the intersection. By the time we got up to the intersection where a block straight ahead was my office and that's where I was headed after dinner. By the time we got up, it stopped at that light. My mind was in overdrive about what am I going to do? And I should have turned right. The restaurant we were going to was on the right.

Okay, let's see where this is going.

As soon as the light turned green, straight to the office and I could look in the rear view mirror and I said all this, it's like, oh, I couldn't keep my mind on business for five minutes and so on the family for five minutes. So that's what you get into. But when you get a tiger by the tail, you got to keep going. But I tell you how I was smart because I've done most of the dumb things, I was smart. And when I went up there and I was broke and I was not on the highest contract, I was on a medium contract, not really making much money. But right from the beginning I had a part time assistant, you know, it dawned on me, said there's a lot of very sharp moms that have been in the executive world, executive assistants and all that have kids that are home now, but would love to get out of the office just for mental health and do something. And so I found a really sharp young woman, and she came in three mornings a week, and this is like in the late 79, and she would show up, I had no tools. She would bring her little portable typewriter with her to work so she'd have something to type on. But without that, you wouldn't have had the growth. And I've always had staff, and I've always had the idea that they'll pay for themselves somehow they will get them and the money will be there. You know what I'm saying? If they're the right person, you know, the right person because you're working with them on a. On a regular basis. But if they're the right person, you'll become more productive and they will more than pay for themselves. But I will tell you, in our business of recruiting, training, opening offices, getting people in their own businesses, I've seen the majority of them stall out, never reach their potential because they won't get an assistant.

Well, and that's ego, Larry.

And it's like, my wife can do it. We don't need it. Because I do this, that, and the other. You know, when I get behind, my wife comes in periodic. I said, is that what you want your wife doing, you idiot? You know? And is your wife really as good as somebody who's in there all the time?

Yeah, well, that. I mean, that really just comes down to ego, right? And ego is sort of held back if we go back to that sort of idea of the triangle, right? This toxic leadership. Ego's running the show there. And ego is telling them, nobody can do it better than me. I can do it myself, I can do it cheaper, I can do it faster. Like, I don't need that. And that the line there is fear and. Or ignorance, right? Fear that people are going to come into your business and find out you are not as confident as you put on that you are, or ignorance that you think you can do it all yourself when truly you might be a gifted realtor, but really crappy at administration, right? So it's a line that people have to move beyond if they're ever going to grow.

A lot of lessons we learn by just working, getting advice, refining, having role models. But a lot of progress we make in life by massive failure. Sometimes half of the time it comes from outside of outside sources. The economy, one thing and another, other employees, or the industry changes, or half of the time, at least we do it to ourselves. When you think back, what's the Worst situation, most painful situation, you look back that you've had to go through and you're, you're, you're kind of proud of yourself that you made it through it.

Yeah, I mean, instantly, I go back to it. We had a client with us. I don't think I will ever do this again. But he had 13 executive assistants or administrative support running this massive business that he had. And he called one day and he said, I am out of money. I can't pay you, and I need to let all of these people go today. And that was the hardest call I'd ever made. It was hundreds of thousands of dollars of revenue that was instantly gone. And that wasn't, it wasn't even that. It was the fact that I had to get on Zoom with 13 women, many of them moms, and tell them that as of that day, they had no more work. And that was brutal. And so I went into hustle mode. Like, I have never went into hustle mode before. I was offering any kinds of services to people. I was like, do you need your Google Drive organized? We'll do that. Right. Just so that I could get these ladies work so that they didn't start. It was, I remember it was like the very beginning of May, so summer school was getting out, right. They were going to, their kids were going to be home full time, so they weren't going to be able to like go find other work. It was brutal. But what that taught me was a few things. Don't put all your eggs in one basket. Right. Diversify your revenue streams and have backup plans for, for when things do fall apart. But more than that, it taught me that, that value that I said I had, that we are relationship based and people come first. It really was true that it wasn't just words for me, that I meant it. And, and that was, that was really a good affirmation for me. Like when tested when my back was against the wall, I, I really did mean what I said.

How long did that take to pull.

Out of such a long time? I would say it was probably like three and a half months of just constant head down build, head down build. And it was, it was rough, but it created an opportunity for a lot of innovation and a lot of ingenuity. Right. We had to get scrappy. I tell this story of I was doing a mission in Africa in Tanzania. And I remember we were driving down the road and there was a man.

I like how you just casually toss that off. I was just doing a mission in Tanzania. Yeah, me too. Me too. I was probably there at the same time. You should have called, you know, Sorry.

I miss you. We could have teamed up and. But I was. We're driving down the road and I saw this man and he was injured in some way, right? Like his leg didn't work or something. And he had taken a lawn chair and two bicycle tires and some, what do you call those bungee cord things. And he. I don't know how he did it, but he fashioned himself a wheelchair out of it. Right? So necessity breeds innovation. And that is when, when things happen, when things are easy. We don't get to be creative. I mean we. You don't. Magical things are created and built when there is a problem to solve.

Right. Now, what did you. What did you figure out from you say? Some innovation. What kind of innovation came out of that one? One. Give me one example.

Yeah. For a year we created a service called Priority Peak. And it was a task based service where any kind of entrepreneur could ask for any task to be done. They uploaded it into a trello board, into a portal. We then assigned it to an executive assistant and within 24 hours at most that task was done. And that got us momentum to be able to get these ladies work for a while. And it wasn't a profitable endeavor. So we sunsetted that after we realized, okay, it got us through that moment, but it wasn't a forever thing. But it was something like that we never would have thought of. Instead of locking people in for a certain set of hours, let's just be their person to do their tasks.

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