[Greatest Hits] Episode #196: Keys to a Decade of Growth with Keynote Speaker Mario Arrizon

Welcome to this episode of the Million Dollar Mastermind. I'm Larry Weddell. And before we get started, if you want to know exactly how to win again and again, go to Wydell on winning.com webinar now to watch something I've put together for you. Now let's get going into this episode of Million Dollar Mastermind.

I got one thing that you talked about on the call with the company and that is why did you. Why is this a big thing for you? Seek to, you know, you made this point. Seek to understand rather than seeking to be understood. Why is that a powerful thing for you? Now what kind of powerful difference is that making for you? And this is you self coaching yourself. You know, this is you saying for me to be the best and for me to have a team and to teach things and set the example that would get the best results. One of those things is I've got to have in my mind, seek to understand rather than seeking to be understood. How did that come about and how is that making a difference for you?

Well, we don't know it. No one wants to admit that they have ego, but we all do. We all do. We all have ego. And you know, when you start getting success right away in certain areas, you start like, well, I know what I'm doing. I don't need to listen to nobody that can be your fault. I'm being honest with you. And I lost so many great people and I almost lost my best guys because of it, Larry. And honestly, I just got so grateful to God. You know what? Thank you so much, God, I don't know what you did for me, but thank you for letting me. Thank you for letting me retain these people. Because, Larry, for a long time it was my way or the highway, my way or the highway. And people can never talk to me like. And I didn't realize I'm easy to talk to. What are they talking about? No, no. And they can even tell me that. So, Larry, I lost so many good people because it was my way or the highway. And look, it still can be your way. I'm still right on building a big bay shop, leaving from the front, you know, you know, leaving a great replacement, doing that. Like, hey, the fundamentals don't change. What my belief is to build a big bay shop that. But, but look, sometimes they have. If you just tell them what to do and they have a disagreement with you, Larry, they have their guard up. They have their guard up. So what I realized, to really lead them, I gotta see from their point of view. I gotta see from their point of view around sitting, like, well, you don't listen to me. Why should I listen to you? Just because I'm telling you, people, especially leaders, sometimes, man, leading leaders is like hurdling cats. I'm just telling you, it's tough sometimes, but if you listen to the leader and they really feel like, you know what? This guy gets me. If you connect with them, then you can lead them for so many times. Let me give you an example, Larry. What really hit me? And I was like, whoa. On parenting, I learned so much from my kids. It's unreal. It's unreal. On parenting, Larry, let me give you an example. I realized that a lot of my friends respect their parents but don't like them. I'm like, what? That's weird. Like, that is kind of weird. Even in high school. Like, oh, yeah, I remember that. Or in college a little bit, I was like, what? Like, okay, the, you know, a couple days that I did go to college, right? I remember that happening, Larry. And I was like, huh, that's a little strange. And you know what they would tell me like, yeah, yeah, my parents are awesome. But you know what? They don't get me. We think differently. And I was like, ah, you know what? Because parents are like, well, why mom? Why this? Because I'm your mom, that's why. That's why you got to listen to me. Because I'm your father. That's it. Because I'm older. Because I know better. That's it. And that was their explanation. Like, wow, they're not even trying to connect with them. They're just, that's the way to lead them. And sometimes we'll lead our day shop that way. Well, because I'm your upline, that's why. Because I make 100,000 a year. Or I make 100,000amonth, that's why. Or. And that's a very bad way. Like, I'm just telling you, they might respect you, but they ain't gonna wanna follow you. So look, let me give you an example. My little boy, Max, I heard him fighting with my wife, Franny.

I was like, what?

And this is a little five year old fighting with my wife. I'm like, what is going on? Why are they shouting over there? And Freddie's like, hey, he doesn't listen to anymore. You gotta talk to him. And I'm like, okay. I'm like, max, what's going on? Why are you not listening to mama? And he was like. And he was just, you know, you Know little kids, Larry, when they're just like. They can't even talk because they're crying so much. He was so. I'm like, all right, relax. Buddy thought he was in trouble. And I'm like, hey, relax. What's going on? And he was shocked. He's like, you're actually going to listen to me? And I'm like, yeah. Like, I can see it. I'm like, what's going on next? And he's like, oh, Mom. Mom doesn't understand. And I'm like, what's going on? He's like, she's like, she doesn't listen to me, dad. She's like, get in the car. Get in the car. And she's not even trying to listen to me. I'm like, what are you trying to tell her? He's like, my sticker fell. I'm like, that's where. You're like, yes, I just want my sticker. My mom doesn't listen. She says, get in the car. We're green light. We're being late. And I'm like, that's all you want, buddy. So I picked up the sticker, put it on his shirt, and he put a big old smile on his face, and I put him in the car. And guess what? My wife was like, how'd you do that? I'm like, I'll explain later.

And then.

Once I did that, I understood his side, like, okay, now let me teach you something. You never talk back to Mom. Big, no, no. I'm like, you love Mom. He's like, yes. I'm like, oh. And he's like, yes. Did you ever see dad scream at Mom? I was like, no, then you shouldn't either. He's like, I get it, dad. I'm sorry. So guess what, Larry? If I just told him, listen to me, because I'm your father, blah, blah, blah. Guess what, Larry? He's like, he's just like everybody else. My son would grow up, Larry. He'll grow up saying, hey, I like my dad, but I don't want to be around him because it's always his way. And then that. I don't want to have that type of relationship. I remember telling Franny in the car, like, babe, your kids are always going to love you, but if you want them to be around us, we gotta seek to understand before we seek to be understood. And when our kids feel that they can actually come to us when they get in trouble instead of running. Instead of them running away from us. Most kids, when they get in trouble, guess what. They hide from their parents. They run away from their parents. Why don't we raise kids that when they get in trouble, they run towards us? Because they know we're there for them. When they're right or when they're wrong, we're there for them. And honestly, I lead the same way now. I lead the same way, and I'm trying to do my best. I'm not saying I'm perfect, Larry. Absolutely not. My guys, some of them are laughing on this call. Yeah, right. You know, Coach still kicks her butt.

Once in a while.

Yes, I'm human. But, Larry, and that touched my wife, and she changed on her parenting. I'm being honest with you. She's such an amazing mother. It's unreal. And why. And it works on everything, Larry, not just for our kids, but that's so important. But with each other. We have such an unbelievable relationship because of that. And with our business, Larry, with their business, man. Some people are like, whoa, Coach, you actually care about what I'm about to say. Like, yes, I'm different, Larry. I'm different because of our leaders. They show me that it's worth us changing. And I promise you, Larry, those people that seek to understand before they seek to be understood, their life will totally change this year because people will be honored to follow them. Like, man, this is my guy. He actually listens to me, man. I want to fight for this person. Because most people in this world, they don't listen to nobody. It's their way, their point of view, and that's it. And that was that for a long time, Larry.

I would have.

If I knew this information 10 years ago, I would be 10 times bigger. I believe that with everything that lost so many good people because of my darn ego. Ego is not your amigo. Right? It is not your friend. It is not. It's the contrary. It's your enemy. And if you can learn and control that. And I'm telling you, there's no limit if you stay hungry, if you stay humble, man, there's no limit, Larry. There's no limit how big you can be. And I'm not gonna tell you that I'm so great, man. I'm so grateful to have God's grace and forgiveness on me. I really do. And sometimes, Larry, we beat ourselves up. We think we're not worthy. We think we're not good enough. We honestly, Larry, they think that someone like yourself. Someone like myself, like, oh, man, Larry never doubts. Larry never fears. It's the quiet opposite. Leaders get attacked the most. The Most. But you know what, Larry? I know your secret, and I know my secret. Not to press religion on nobody. But, man, we have a higher source, right? And man, when it's dark, he's our light, you know? And that's my secret. I mean it. And some powerful man told me something really, really impactful in my theater room in the back. And he said, hey, Mario, where does greatness come from? And I was like, I don't know. He's like, from God. From God. He wants us to be great man. And man. That hit me so much, Larry, and I appreciate for you telling me those words, because I'm like, wow, I'm a representation of him. And I must be great, because how I am in this world is how I represent him. Not perfect, but man. Greatness, when adversity hits like, man, do you know who my God is? Do you know who created me? And responding that way, you're unstoppable. So thank you for those powerful words.

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Well, of course, you're welcome. And this. The thing is, Mario, we've got to always be aware. It's not what we know, it's what our team knows. And Eddie Robinson, who was the African American coach that before Bear Bryant, was the number one winning football coach of all time, they asked him about what he knew about winning that allowed him to have all those victories, and he said, it's not what I know, it's what my players know. And it's not what we know, it's what our team. Now, we gotta always realize we're dealing with trainees. Powerful, powerful. And the thing is, Marcia, we used to. Dean Francis and I had this thing where I used to tell him I got many of my great management lessons from back in the day. They had Caesar the dog whisperer on tv, and the way that he worked with the dog, you know, because he would, like, talk to the dog on the way the dog thought, and, you know, the pack and this, that and the other, you know, but everything he did was coming from their understanding and get, he got what he wanted. I mean, you got to keep him on the leash, you got to teach him things and this, that and the other. But you do it in a way that they will accept and back. You know, we have so many decisions to make in leadership and it's. The sooner we all learn. It's not how great the program is, it's how enthusiastic the people are about following the program. Because you could have a half budded system, but people are wild with excitement about that program. They're going to just knock it out of the park. And so the key is you come up with the best system, simplest way of teaching it, way of doing that. You install bud. The main job is to get your people excited about that so they not just do it, they understand why it's to their advantage to do it that way that they can get it done quicker, faster, better this way. Sure, we can do all these other things. And I tell you, Mario, I used to sit, see, you know, we have to call shots sometimes and we have to. But when Art Williams had that, he would sit. Usually I knew what he was going to do at a manager meeting because I would have, we would have talked about it beforehand. But you get in there and you go a whole hour. And he would go in, you know, we got this situation developing and you know, one thing we could do is this, you know, the obvious thing that most people would think. And he said, I thought, I got all excited about it and then I thought, oh, wait a minute, if we do that, this, that and the other will go wrong. And then he would go painfully for an hour and he'd go through, well, then the next thing I thought was, well, let's do this. And then that would be great, but then this would happen. Then I'm thinking, there's got to be another way. So he'd walk through all of the options for an hour and then he'd finally get, he said, and that's why we're gonna do it dawned on me, hey, if we do it this way, all those other problems go away and, and we could just knock it out of the park. And by that time everybody was, you know, gung ho, ready to run out of there and install the pro because he had worked through all of the negatives in his mind, all the other options. And you know, it's the old feel, felt, found. I know how you feel, I felt the same way. But here's what I found. But somehow you've Got to find a way to get people on board with you. And I got to the point where I got tired of coming up with solutions. I don't know if you ever get like that, you know, we got a new dilemma. What in the world are we going to do? Move to a bigger office? You know, we got too many people on this right here. We got. We can't get this. We can't. You know, it's problems of growth. Here's how I got to the point where I decided it was only my job to notice what we needed to do, but it was my managers, my leaders in the office, their job to come up with a solution. I just made it easy on myself because I knew if they came up with it, they'd be more gung ho than if I came. Moses came down from the mountain with the ten commandments and tried to shove them down their throat. So I just said, hey, we got a problem. What are we going to do? And then what I find is sometimes the dumbest guy in the room would come up with the best solution. But it was their solution that was the most important thing. And so as a leader, you've got to find out you can't be a dictator because that turns you into a bully. You got to be a coach. You know, people don't want a boss, a bully. They want a coach. And so, great stuff, Mario.

If you enjoyed what you've heard and are dead serious about finding out for yourself exactly how this works, if in the real world, I've taken the most valuable business lessons I've learned over 40 years and put them into something for you to watch, go to whiteellawinning.com webinar now in order to move up as fast as possible, I'm Larry Wydell, and I run the Million Dollar Mastermind. Go, go, go.