Do Things That Scare You | My TEDx Talk

Yo, what's up guys? Welcome to today's video. Now I just realized I haven't given you guys a room tour yet, so here we go, right? Bed, desk, and that concludes the room tour. But like I said a couple videos ago, I'm off in 5 days to Germany, and then I'm traveling for most of April. Then in May we'll buy somewhere extra nice, right? As my man Gary Vee says, sometimes you gotta eat shit so you can eat caviar later on. I've also not been tracking macros for like 2 weeks. Kind of need to get back on it a little bit. Anyways, today's the day of the TED Talk, so I'm going off to just get a quick gym session in before it all kicks off because we got to meet with like the organizers, the speaking coaches, and everything. So we'll be spending most of the day in Griffith College, I imagine. Fresh batch of jeans from my jeans people, and that is Legend London. So we have the Ripped Light Blue, perfect for summer. Pretty sure these are the All Black. These are the Ripped Midnight Navy. So you probably see me wearing these often on my social media. I'm going to link them down below. Again, they always sort me out whenever they come out with new lines. Really appreciate it, guys. Okay, update. I'm in Griffith College, just in the kind of emergency exit backroom area. You can probably hear one of the talks going on up there, but I'm about to go on. Little bit nervous. There's like a crowd and you know, there's some really good speakers here. I don't know my talk 100%, but that's kind of how I always do things. I just need to remember to speak a little bit slower because you know, usually I'm a little bit too hyped up, so I need to remember that. Hey, yeah, no, go on ahead. Yeah, yeah, I'm just doing some vlogging. Say hello. Hey, there you go. Yeah, I just need to remember to take it slow and most of all have fun up there. So I'm gonna try record the speech for you guys. It is on going beyond your fears and doing things that scare you and how fear is subjective. This is the back room. So when I was asked to do a talk about doing what scares you, I was literally just like, oh my God, this is perfect. Okay, this is an amazing topic. It's something that we don't talk about enough and it's something that we need to do more often. We always look at our fears and we're always told to avoid fear as if it's a bad thing, as if fear is dangerous. But personally, I say the opposite. I say we should look at our fears and say, "Why? Why does this scare me?" And then we should look at them and then we should tackle them head-on. So that's what I'm going to be talking about today. When I got contacted again by the TED crew, I said, "Okay, who's the other speakers? What do you guys want me to talk about?" And they told me the other talks and speeches that were going to go down, and there were some monumental stories. And then there's here, me, with my little problems that literally don't even compare. But the thing is, fear is actually subjective, and what scares one person might not even faze the next person. And you probably see your highlighted in red there. And it doesn't matter what scares the next person. You need to address your fears because that is what is important. So I'll give you a bit of a backstory about me. You know, about 3 years ago, I wasn't in a good place. I was in a bad place. But actually, I almost hate saying that I was in a bad place because it kind of sounds like a bit, "Oh, you know, woe is me." But let's say I wasn't where I wanted to be. So I was in and out of a college course that I had no interest in. I really didn't enjoy it. I was failing my exams, repeating year after year, and really just stagnant. I was fired from a job that I hated, and I actually don't even blame my boss for firing me. I say I walked into work and they were just like, "Oh, not this guy again. He does not want to be here." I'm not saying that I had nothing at all because something that I really always remind people of is that there's always someone worse off than you, but I did feel like my back was up against the wall and that I was really just going nowhere. So this kind of came from a little bit when I was in college. And we're often always told to focus on our weaknesses and try work on them instead of focus on our strengths and doing what we love to do, doing what we're really good at, and doing what we enjoy. So here's me sitting in college doing quantitative techniques 'cause that's gonna help me loads of where I wanna go. And then I get handed back a big F and I feel like a failure. I feel like an idiot and I feel really bad about myself. And I was told, you need to work on your quantitative techniques or whatever the hell it was and I need to work on my weaknesses. Whereas in my life, there's always been one thing that I've really enjoyed and I've been really good at and that is physical training, strength and conditioning and fitness. Even when I played rugby since I was 12 years old, I would always enjoy the fitness, the gym, the conditioning more than the actual games, to be honest with you, and more than the actual skill sessions. So after a couple of years of really just going nowhere, and like I'm talking about literally repeating, doing the same year, no real progress in life, I said I really need to start focusing on my strengths and just doing what I love because I've got nothing else to lose. So this is— it's kind of funny, and this is my fear, okay? And this was my number one biggest fear, and this is how it all started for me. So I told you I was really into fitness, the gym, everything, learning about it. So I wanted to start a blog. I wanted to share this with the world. So at the time, Facebook, it was, you know, really good algorithm and everything, was like the main platform. So I started I started a Facebook like page and I was so terrified to do this. No, like literally I put it off for weeks and weeks and weeks because I was so literally petrified because other people would say, "Oh God, look at him. He thinks he's amazing. He thinks he deserves a celebrity like page. He thinks he knows it all about fitness and gym." I was literally petrified and I didn't do it. I finally tackled my fear head on and did it. I had an anxiety attack. I like fell off my chair. And it's actually funny that a guy who now gives talks on social media marketing was petrified to start a Facebook page a couple of years ago. So it just goes to show you how things can really do a 360. So, and a lot of the time as well, people were saying to me, oh yeah, if you start this Facebook Live page, you're going to look like you love yourself. And we view that as an insult. Like, now I'm like, hell yeah, I love myself. The opposite is I hate myself. That sounds miserable. So you should all love yourself. That's a little side tangent there. But we— I love saying that as well. It feels good, doesn't it? But we're always crippled by the expectations of others. And when I'm starting this page and starting out on social media, I thought that— I was almost ashamed to do it. I thought that I had to do the school, the college, the internship, the 9 to 5, climb the corporate ladder even though you're never going to get to the top while you're so young. But anyways, and then retire and die, and that was it. And I thought if I didn't do that, my family would be annoyed at me, my peers would look down at me, my friends would be like, come on, Rob, get your act together, stop messing around on Facebook, but I'm glad to say that I went with my gut feeling and I proved them wrong. So don't be afraid. Again, afraid, fear. Don't be afraid to double down on your strengths and do that thing that may be scaring you. In Ireland, we've got this thing, and I like to call it the island mentality or the small town mentality. And basically it is what that is. If someone steps out of line, everyone's quick to say, "Hey, get back in line. Do what you're meant to do. Don't break the norm. Get back in line." And you can kind of picture it. It's like, you know, when you're down in the pub or down in the shops, it's like, "Jeez, did you see what John's after doing there last week? His mother wouldn't be proud." It's a real Irish thing, and I think that it's just important to address that and to stop caring what other what people think because there's always going to be someone that disagrees with you or what your mission is or what you want to do, and that is absolutely fine. While these may sound like really small events and really minuscule stuff, they can really add up over time. So for example, when I was on Facebook for a while, I said, okay, it's time to take it to the next level, and I wanted to show people what my personality's like what I'm like on camera. So I said, I want to start making videos. So I want to venture out onto YouTube. And I got that same feeling I did when I published my first YouTube video. I got the same feeling as I did when I published my Facebook page. This feeling, it feels— it's scary, but we need to actually look out for this feeling and go for things that make us feel this way. So again, I freaked out. I said, oh my God, people are going to say I've I've got a weird voice. People are going to say I look funny on camera. People are going to say this and that. And of course, everyone was super nice about it, so I was worrying about nothing. But all these small little events will end up adding, adding, adding up and having a huge massive impact. So not only do I think you should do things that scare you, I think that you should do things that scare you often. I think every day you should try do something that scares you. This talk actually kind of scared me. So that's me sorted for today. That's my, you know, ticked off the list. And so every day when you do this and you're going against your fears, it's going to add up and bring you where you want to be. And I always think about something called the butterfly effect as well. And it's basically a theory that the smallest thing, like a butterfly flapping its wings, can trigger a massive, massive event all the way across the world. Which I believe is true. But in this case, if I didn't click publish on that measly Facebook page, I would not have my own clothing line, not have one of the fastest growing YouTube channels in the country, not be able to wake up every day, do whatever the hell I like, literally travel whenever I want. I wouldn't be in front of you guys giving this speech right now and doing what I love. So it may seem tiny, it may seem irrelevant, and may seem small, but it could lead to life-changing events. So I'm not really overexaggerating at all when I say every single defining moment has come from doing something that puts fear inside me. I can promise you that once you stop caring so much about what other people think, especially other people that you don't even know, you stop caring about people's opinions and going beyond your fears, life becomes a lot more enjoyable. Okay, so talk done, and Camilla just brought down A tray of fruit. Look how pretty that is. That's just what I wanted right now. Alright people, so that wraps up today, and I think that was a really nice way to finish off March. Today is March 31st, and then April I'm excited for as well. I love just like looking at your month, seeing what you got planned, and just looking forward to it. So we go to Germany in a couple days, but that was like the last thing on my schedule before we go. Like, I got a few meetings, but like nothing like massive planned. So yeah, I'm really just gonna get myself ready for the trip. I've never been before. It's meant to be massive, like it's meant to be absolutely crazy in a good way. And I'm gonna focus in on my diet and training a lot for the next couple of days and be fully prepared for when I go over. So I hope you enjoyed this vlog. I'll see you in the next one. Thank you so much for watching. Keep it real. Peace.