In this instructional video, Matthew Hussey (presented as “Matthew AI”) uses a vivid metaphor of a monkey at a bar to illustrate how to lower the anxiety that often accompanies approaching someone you’re attracted to. He explains that instead of viewing the interaction as a high‑stakes conversation, you should treat it as a brief moment, reducing the perceived threat level. The core tactic he recommends is to notice a small detail—such as a man’s shoes—and give a casual compliment (“You have good taste in shoes”). This creates a low‑pressure opening, allows you to step back, and invites the other person to re‑initiate the interaction, effectively flipping the conversational dynamic from reactive to proactive. Hussey claims this method reduces anxiety, provides reassurance of mutual attraction, and increases the likelihood that the person will chase you. The video concludes with a promotion for his Fast‑Track webinar and membership site, encouraging viewers to submit questions for further personalized advice.
Chapters
Hang on, Jameson. There we go. Dog in the video. That'll make it do better, won't it? This video will do better because you're in it even though in real terms you've contributed nothing. Alright, let's get serious now. No more animals in this video. No more cheap ploys for engagement. So let's imagine monkeys at a bar. And this is a man. We just did a fast track webinar, so I will use my audio equipment as a person. Monkey is at the bar here. Now, what Monkey's afraid of, what makes her anxious, is if I were to go and talk to that person, I'm making a big decision to go over there and talk to them. I'm now stuck here in what could be a major rejection or an embarrassing situation where I have nothing to say. So what we want to do is bring that down from a level 8 of anxiety to a level 4. How do we do that? We start seeing this as creating just a moment instead of a conversation. If Monkey is at the bar, and let's say this is Jane, Jane is the camera. Monkey's talking to Jane and maybe this guy over here, she spots him, says okay, instead of going, hi, how are you? And now they have a big conversation from here, which is, is now tough and awkward. And by the way, even if this conversation goes on for 10 minutes, monkey might be wondering, does he like me? Am I just imagining this or does he actually think I'm attractive too? Monkey doesn't know, but what I'm about to suggest is going to help Monkey know if he's attracted and reduce her nerves. Wow. So Monkey's back at the bar, sees the guy, huh? And Monkey happens to notice that he's wearing pretty cool shoes. So Monkey looks down, looks at him and says, like those shoes. You have good taste in shoes. And then she turns back and talks to Jane. She's not really saying, I like your shoes. What Monkey's really saying is, it's okay for you to talk to me. He now, if he likes, you can close down that space again. But this time it's him closing down that space. You close down space enough to talk to someone, but then you recreate enough space that they reinitiate. When they reinitiate, it's like the dynamics reversed. They've chosen now to talk to you. It was a proactive decision to talk to you instead of a reactive and passive state of simply being polite to someone who's talking to them. Go try that today. I promise you, you won't have no anxiety. But you'll have a lot less because you won't be expecting so much from the conversation, and you'll get more reassurance that someone actually likes you when you break for a moment from the conversation, and they're the one who reinitiates. By the way, if you have a question that you want to ask me on my next Fast Track webinar, maybe Monkey will make an appearance. Go to askmh.com type in your question, you'll get a free trial to my membership, and we'll see how it goes. Maybe your question will get answered. Even if it doesn't, I'll be answering lots of questions that are going to help your love life, and we're just gonna have a great time. You should be a member because it's wonderful and everyone loves it so much. Why is Monkey such a l.
