Matthew Hussey shares four principles to improve your love life: become a student of people and study attraction, understand that everyone wants to fall in love, create perceived value through your choices and behavior, and treat rejection as a learning tool rather than something to fear.
Hi, guys, it's Matthew here. Welcome to 2013. I hope you're excited. I'm really excited. It's a new year. I always get energized at the start of the year. I know you probably have some big goals this year, and to help you with those, I have four big ideas I want to share with you. Now, these are really specifically designed to help you in your love life, but you could use them anywhere in your life. Really, the first big idea is become a student of people. When I first started out in this area, the biggest fascination I had was human beings. Why do people do what they do? What gets people attracted? What makes someone magnetic? I want you to do the same. Now, when I started out, I used to observe everything that people did. My understanding of people today comes from that observation. I want you to do the same. Now, when you see that you're attracted to someone, really try and figure out why. When you see a guy, maybe you've got a male friend and he gets attracted to another woman, find out what he's attracted to in her. Really get curious about it. When you understand that, you're going to understand attraction on an intricate level. The second big idea I want to share with you is that people want to fall in love. Now this is a quick point, but you know what? Wherever you go, remember, people want to be swept off their feet. They want to get attracted to other people, they want to get into relationships, they want to fall in love with. The world is working with you in that respect. All you need to do is become the person that people want to fall in love with. Now, the third big idea is that when people fall in love or when they get attracted or when they get interested is because the person that the object of their desires has value. Now, value is something we all intrinsically have as human beings. Of course it is, but. But people measure value that they perceive, not value that people actually have. Now, one of the greatest gifts we have is that we can create value. One of the things I do is I show people how to create value. Now, let's say you're a woman in a bar and a guy next to you offers you a shot. Hey, me and my friends are doing a round of shots. Do you want a shot? You as a woman can say, yeah, okay, or you can tread your own path a little bit more. You could say, you know what, I won't do a shot, but I'll have a gin and tonic if it's going to. Or if you're offering, I'll have A vodka tonic. I'll have something else. That way you're still joining in on the fun, but you're doing it on your terms now, immediately, you've created value for yourself as a woman. If you want a male example, any man who goes into a room and can talk to more than one woman at a time, let's say she's talk sitting with her friends. There's three of them. He starts talking to them. If he can hold court, tell a story, tell a joke, or just ask them how they are, immediately his value goes up because he can show that he's in control. We can create value. That's something I really want you to work on this year. It's really exciting to have that tool. The fourth thing is, I want you to get good with rejection. This is another big idea. Get good with rejection. Don't try and avoid it this year. Become okay with it. Make rejection your friend. If you try more this year, if you put yourself on the line, trust me, you will get rejected. That's absolutely fine. I've been rejected tons of times in my life. So has anyone who's ever tried anything. So in your love life this year, prepare for rejection. Welcome it. Make it your friend. Because if you do, opportunities are going to come rolling in because you're not going to be avoiding situations anymore. I want you to leave a comment today. Here's what I want you to leave a comment saying, give me one time that you got rejected and tell me what happened in that moment. Where were you? What was happening? What did you say? How did it go down? Could be from 10 years ago, it could be from yesterday. But tell me a time when you got rejected and let everyone else know about it. I'm going to get loads of people commenting and we're going to get this thread of rejection. Why? Because if we can make rejection okay now, the rest of the year is going to be easy. Take care, my friends. I'll see you in the next video.
