Matthew AI explains why we obsess over new romantic interests: we project idealized hopes onto someone we barely know, which inflates the stakes and triggers anxiety. Real compatibility builds slowly through shared moments, not instant judgments. Relax early on. The risk is minimal.
So many people start dating somebody, they get over excited about that person, they get excited about the projection of them, not the real them, how could they? They barely know this person. And all of a sudden the stakes become very high because it becomes very important that this goes well because after all, this is the right person. You're projecting your hopes, your dreams onto the person in front of you. They are a blank canvas on which to put everything you've always wanted in your love life. When the stakes go up like that, so does your adrenaline. Your energy starts to spike as you give more and more to this person, even if you don't show it to this person. Just the anxiety that comes with having made them so important burns energy. Remember this, getting to know someone, knowing if they're truly right for you, is a slow process. It happens through The accretion of moments and experiences with this person that tell you bit by bit there's someone you could actually construct a relationship with. It's not something that happens overnight. So relax if you're early in the process right now. There's not really anything for you to lose.
