I Have a Huge Announcement

Hello, everyone, and welcome back to the channel and this special video where I have something huge to announce to you. Now, many of you know I've been doing this for 15 years now. My entire adult life has been dedicated to helping people in their love lives. And that was where I started on YouTube, making videos for just a handful of people who are watching them. And now, 15 years later, I have almost 3 million subscribers on YouTube. I've done multiple world tours, and I have a podcast called Love Life. I wrote a New York Times bestselling book, a book that ever since then my publisher has wanted me to follow with another book. And yet every year she calls me, I've told her the same thing. I'm not ready. I don't know what I want to write about in another book. Since then, my work has evolved a little. And one of the reasons that it's evolved is because I started to notice that even with all the advice in the world about how to create opportunities, how to create choice in one's love life, how to create attraction on a level that people had never had before, people were still struggling to find love. The question of why someone was still single remained. And I think that that question is one that has very complicated and individual answers for so many people. It's one of the reasons that that question is so infuriating to be asked when someone says to us, so why still single? Whether it's a person you're on a date with or a family member at Thanksgiving, it could be really annoying because internally you go, I don't know why I'm still single. If I had that answer, maybe I wouldn't be anymore. Why? Why are you single? What the fuck does that even mean? And by the way, if it makes you feel any better, I got this question my entire career. People would ask me at scale, but, Matthew, why are you still single? Why are you single? That you had. All right, and here's the thing, in my 20s that didn't bother me that much. I felt like, well, I can shrug this off because you know what? I'm enjoying being single. I don't need a long term relationship right now. That's something for the future. But some, a certain point in my life, that question started to affect me more because internally I had started asking that question of myself. I'd reached a point where dating wasn't as fun anymore. I felt like my own patterns in dating were becoming a little compulsive. Running on dopamine, cycles of just trying to get my fix, of numbing myself Trying to run away from something, an uncomfortable emotion. Dating became unrewarding, unfulfilling, and left a void that I was continuously trying to fill. Deep down I started to realize that what I want is something more sustainable, more nutritional. I want a long term relationship. But I was struggling to find it myself, which is a difficult place to be when it's what you talk about every single day with everybody else. And I started to ask myself many of the same questions that I know many of you out there asking yourselves. Why in a world of 8 billion people am I struggling to meet my person? Am I going to have to settle? Am I too picky? Are my standards too high? Am I going to miss out on all of my best years with someone because I meet someone too late? Is my version of love that I'm imagining I'm going to find one day something that isn't actually realistic. This for me was a feeling that I had building over a few years until it reached its crescendo. At a point in my life where I hit a kind of rock bottom, I went through a tremendous heartbreak. Alongside that heartbreak, I happened to be suffering from chronic physical pain on the back of years of anxiety and stress that I had failed to resolve until my body finally went, if you're not going to resolve it this way, I'm going to start giving you symptoms that ruin your life. And that's exactly what they did. I faced a depression the likes of which I had never experienced in my life. My chronic physical pain robbed me of the joy of my life and made me fall out of love with my own life, which was so painful because I'm a life lover and I couldn't connect to what I liked about life anymore. Everything was marred by pain and my heartbreak was seriously made me question my choices, whether I could trust my choices, whether I could trust myself to make myself happy, and whether I was ever going to find a relationship that truly made me happy. I, from this place, made a decision in my life. What suddenly dawned on me is that there may be invisible reasons that I am too close to to perceive that are the real reasons why I am struggling to find the kind of love that I say I want. I also realized that that's true for so many other people out there. I called my publisher, Karen, and I said to her, I know what I want to write about. I know that this is the subject of the next book and I'm ready to write this book because I believed that if I could change this for myself, I could change it for other people and we could all learn together from that point on. I thought about this book for four years straight. I wrote constantly. I went on my own journey of exploration to try and figure out these things. I read books I would never normally read. I found mentors that were unlike the mentors I'd had before. I went through crazy experiences of my own. I got therapy on a consistent basis. I wrote and journaled about every single thing that was helping me develop the self awareness that I needed along the way. And through that I ended up with what I believe is the best piece of work I have ever created. So I am proud and immensely excited to share with you today that my new book is finally finished. It is called Love Life how to raise your standards, find your person and live happily no matter what. Everything that I know by this point in my life about love and how to find it is packed into this book. It is available for pre order right now@lovelifebook.com I come to you today not as a 25 year old guy who knows how to help you create opportunities in your love life, but as a 36 year old man whose life has been transformed by the discoveries, the insights and the techniques that I have put into this book. And when I say my own life has been transformed, it has been transformed. I have become a far more open hearted person. I have become far more compassionate towards myself, far more accepting of myself. I've become vulnerable on a level that I've never been vulnerable before. And you'll see that vulnerability in this book at a level that you've never seen from me before. I share stories and moments from my own life that mean by the end of this book you'll know me differently than you ever have, even if you followed me for 15 years. I realized through this work that there were people in my life and areas of my life where I didn't have standards. Even though I've talked about standards for years and years, I suddenly realized that I was blind to areas of my life where I didn't have standards. Where I was getting walked all over, where I was sacrificing and abandoning myself. And I changed that and that changed my life. And amidst all of this work, I actually met the most extraordinary human being of my life. Someone that I got engaged to last year. Her name is Audrey. Many of you have seen her on the podcast and in other places that I've posted. And it's no coincidence that two weeks from today, from me making this announcement, her and I are flying to get married with all of our friends and family. That has been the full circle of this process for me. I started started this journey from one of the most difficult, painful and dark places of my life and I share this with you now right before I go to get married to the love of my life. I believe that this is going to change so many lives and this isn't me from my pedestal saying I can teach you. This is just me saying I've done so much work in recent years. I've had access to such amazing people and mentors and information and personal experiences and I am putting it together in the same way I always have for you in a highly practical roadmap that I know is the reason so many of you have followed me for so many years is because whatever I bring to you, you know I make it practical. But this is me taking the deepest work, the most difficult question of what are the hidden reasons, the hidden barriers to you finding the love you want and giving you a step by step roadmap out of those places and into the love that you want. The book is available for pre order right now@lovelifebook.com and this is where I need your help. Whether you've been following me for 15 years and I've seen you through heartbreak or whether you just found out about me recently, but you find value in the things that I say. I would love for you to go over to lovelifebook.com and order a copy of the book. Authors these days in order to get a book out there need pre orders. It is the thing that drives early attention for a book. Now I know that you'll find out about my book no matter what, but pre orders in large numbers are what allow a book to have enough noise and enough attention that other people find out about the book that would never have opened otherwise found out about it. I would be so grateful if you would take a moment to pre order a copy of the book. I am in the process of putting together some extremely valuable bonuses for the people that do pre order. So keep your receipt because these bonuses are either going to be bonuses that you can't get another way or bonuses that will be very expensive, far more expensive than the price you'll get them for by simply pre ordering a copy copy of the book today. I'm also creating a special group just for people who have pre ordered the book where I'm going to take them on a on a kind of mini journey between now and the launch of the book with some special behind the scenes insights, live moments and bonuses along the way so you'll be able to access that group. Just keep your receipt and I'll give you all of the information in due course. For now, I just want to say thank you so much for being here with me, for being on this journey, for supporting me in getting to this point, for being patient with me while I grow so that I can then give more to all of you. As that happens. I'm just so excited to share this with you and everything that you're going to learn from it and the growth that you're going to get from it. I know how transformative this is going to be because I know what it's already done for my life and it's such a personal project for me in sharing, sharing this with you. Everything you need to go and pre order a copy right now is@lovelifebook.com Go over there, check it out and I can't wait to invite you into this special group of mine where we're going to go on this journey together. Thank you so much for watching. I'll see you soon. Sam.