The 4 Miserable Types Of Women On Valentine's Day... From Matthew Hussey & Get The Guy

Now, there is one thing a lot of you don't know about me, and that's that I am an avid gardener. I do like to garden. Why do you like to garden, Matt? Well, let me tell you. Every year, I like to grow four roses. Why four roses? I hear you ask Jameson four roses. Because on Valentine's Day, there are four people that I think need a big shout out. Apparently, some gurus don't even do this. Apparently, some love gurus, as we're called, don't grow roses, which is extraordinary. I don't know what they do the rest of the year. I think there are four people on Valentine's Day that are just feeling slightly down in the dumps and need a little love to get them back out there and, dare I say it, a little bit of advice. So I'm gonna do both today. The first rose. This is going to the recluse. The recluse in this situation isn't just someone who doesn't have a boyfriend on this day or someone that they're see that they could have a romantic thing with on Valentine's. It's also the person that doesn't necessarily have friends to share it with. We all know friends can make a day like this easier, and this person may feel well and truly on their own. If I'm talking to you right now, then I want you to take heart. You, in a way, have the easiest job ahead of you, because right now, a millimeter shift for you will create a dramatic result. If you go into work, let's say, with a box of donuts or a bunch of coffees or something that you can hand out to everyone on Valentine's Day and be like, hey, I wanted to. To give these to everyone just as a little token of my appreciation for you all. Everyone takes one. And of course, they're talking about you. Oh, Katie did this. Isn't she so lovely? And when they look at you, you can go, hey, I just wanted to do something nice. Now you'll get talking to people. And of course, when you get talking to people and they start to see that you're actually a very pleasant, fun person, they'll start to want to invite you to things. They may not happen straight away, but it's the beginning of the process of starting to engage more with other people in the human race. Rose number two. Now, this type of woman that tends to be miserable on Valentine's Day has friends, but the difference is her friends are people that actually can make her feel worse. They're all in relationships. So she sits there feeling like the odd one out. What can you do? Lady number two? Firstly, we all know Valentine's Day is a day where you can just give. You have it as an excuse to give love to whoever you want, whether it's your mom, whether it's your brother, your sister, your family, your friends, whoever. Give love to the people around you and be that person that just has a great spirit on a day like today and isn't affected by worrying about what everyone else is doing in their relationships. You're okay being single, you're going to enjoy it, but you're still going to give love anyway. Secondly, go out of your way to do something a little fun and flirtatious for the person you do like. Now, it could be something cool. I'm not saying like a cheesy Valentine's thing. You could go out and buy a little bottle of whiskey. Go out and get a bottle of, like, little Maker's Mark or something. This isn't sponsored by Maker's Mark. Go for a Woodford Reserve if you like, give it to him and write a little note saying, just in case. I'm the only person who recognizes how cute you are today. Now, it's really sweet and it's really kind of lovable and it doesn't necessarily feel like it's an overly serious thing. It's just a nice thing you did for someone that you happen to like. Rose number three. Now, the third type of person that might be miserable on Valentine's Day is the person who has no fricking idea if they're in a relationship or not. She's sitting there wondering, is he gonna actually ask me officially to be his girlfriend or is he not? And of course, you as a woman are taking what he does on Valentine's Day to be some sort of cue as to whether he does see you as the person or not. Here's what you need to do. Firstly, don't allow this day to stack up the pressure. When you're measuring what his contribution is to you on Valentine's Day, to what extent does he make you feel special? I want you to consider something. You always have to take someone in the round. You always have to look at what is the pattern of this person if he's a prick six days a week, but then on Valentine's he decides to go out of his way for you and do something really nice, which very often the wrong guy will. He'll double up on Valentine's Day. Don't make that like, oh, he's so sweet. I guess he's a dick the rest of the time, but on Valentine's he was great. Don't do that. If he's an amazing guy who just happens not to give a shit about Valentine's Day, don't rain hell upon him for not doing something amazing for you on Valentine's Day. Not everybody cares. You have to take someone for who they actually are in the round. If he knows it means something to you and he doesn't do anything. There are two things I want you to remember. Firstly, you may take it as a cue. Don't allow it to suddenly determine the nature of that relationship, but take it as a cue. Ah, noted. You knew this was important to me, but you didn't do anything. Okay, you can note that down. But secondly, and importantly, don't change who you are in order to compensate for that. In other words, don't decide you're going to be cold or mean back. You can still send that person a message that day saying thinking of you or miss you today. You can still send that and be the kind person you are regardless of what they're doing for you. Doesn't mean you're suddenly going to welcome them with open arms all the time. Doesn't mean that you're going to get into a relationship with that person, but be who you want to be in spite of who they're being on this day. Dun dun, dun dun dun dun. Four throws. Woman number four is actually in a very loving relationship. But she still finds a way to be miserable today. How is that possible? It's because she makes comparisons. She looks at her best friend who's been in a relationship with a guy for a month and sees that he does some big crazy thing for her on Valentine's Day. He sends her a big bunch of flowers and takes her out to this amazing dinner. And then her guy she's been with for three years barely does anything. He comes home with a card and she says, why isn't he doing what this guy is doing? Guys can't compete with your idea of Valentine's Day. They can't compete with every vision you've had from every movie you've watched and everything that's supposed to happen on this day. It's extraordinarily intimidating. I know you want your guy to do something for you on Valentine's Day. I get it. It's a day where he shows that he cares about you and you know the day doesn't really matter, but it's really about him showing you that you matter. And it's an excuse to do something nice for each other. Okay? The big thing you have to do for a guy, if Valentine's means anything to you, because maybe it doesn't, but if it does, you've got to communicate to the guy, this is a day that has meaning. Not because I want to be bought tons of stuff, but just because I'm excited about spending it with you. So a week ahead of Valentine's, you can tell him I'm really excited about spending this Valentine's with you, that I get to share it with you. The key is to make this a lovely statement about the two of you and your relationship and what you share, not to make it about crazy expectations. A relationship is a marathon. It's not a spirit. Who cares what that new guy did for her? Because he's desperate to impress her right now and do something crazy for her that has no bearing on the relationship that they're gonna have over the long term. It's about sustainability. So, okay, if he's awful on this day and forgets everything, talk to him about it. But when he does, do things, also find that way to appreciate them and focus on giving. If it means something to you, then it means you have to be in a place of giving and not worrying about what you're getting at that point, too. It's going to make you a far more attractive person at the same time. So there you have it. Those are the four women that I garden for all year long. And you know what? It's just a metaphor. You don't even need the roses. Thank you for watching. And if you enjoy watching my videos, why not go the better experience and come and see me in person. We are two tour locations down. We did Toronto and we did Winnipeg. Jameson, if we have, like a picture or something of Winnipeg, let's throw it in here. And we have a bunch more locations coming up. Go and get your ticket and be there, and let's have fun and enjoy life. Happy Valentine's Day, everybody. So I've grown these four roses for these four people, and it's required a lot of work. I've been out in the garden a lot, tending to these, getting them to the supple, supple rose number two. Now, apparently, a lot of gurus don't do this, which I find astounding. Or even if they do, they grow them in bush form, not individually. Out of the ground, you can't. If you. If you laugh, I'm. Rose number sun is three in Japanese. Sorry if I'm talking to you right now. Listen up, girlfriend. Have an amazing day. It's Valentine's Day. Who really cares? But, you know, kind of care, but, you know.