This Journalist Set Out To Destroy Me! From Matthew Hussey, GetTheGuy

So a couple of months back, I'm doing my event, forget the guy and a big journalist shows up and she told us she was coming and she came this day and I didn't really know who she was. And to tell you the truth, whenever we do an event and journalists come, I never know who they are because we just make them part of the normal crowd. And this journalist shows up and she's from Glamour magazine and she's decided that she's going to write a piece on the event that we do at get the Guy. And she comes in and she sits down and we go through the event. And if you've ever been to this event, it's crazy and, you know, it's high energy and we go through so many different things. And we get to the end of the event and I get a phone call 24 hours later and it's this person and she says, look, do you fancy meeting for a coffee to discuss the event? And I said, sure, no problem. If you need a few more things for the article, no problem. So we get together for a coffee and she sits there and she's completely honest with me. She says, I came to destroy you. She said, I saw some stuff about you online. She said, to be fair, I hadn't watched your videos, I hadn't seen anything. But I saw a couple of things about you online. I saw some blurb. I just thought, you know what, this guy, this guy, he's another. In fact, in her article that she wrote, the term that was used was another bullshit peddling dating guru. So she said, you know, I thought you were that and I came and I set out to destroy you. She said, I went to my editor, I said, look at this guy, let's take him down a peg. He's going to be one of another, one of these guys who just takes people for a ride. Said I got and see him, I got right about this. And she said after five minutes of the event, I realized we were screwed. She said, we were screwed. I went back to my editor after the event and I said, we're screwed. I can't write that piece. I can't do it now. I have to write a different piece. No, she said, I've been commissioned. She was telling me this and you know, bless her, she was completely honest with me. She said, I was commissioned to write a 1200 word piece telling people how terrible you were and now I couldn't do it. She said, I had to get commissioned to write a completely new piece on you. And so we're sitting there and we're both kind of stuck because obviously, had I known that, I definitely would have felt the pressure in my event, but I didn't know that. And had she known, she would have got commissioned for a different piece. And she said, look, I need to write a different piece. Can you help? And together we came up with this new idea. We said, well, look, you enjoyed the event. You had a great time. You thought it was good advice. Why don't we set you a new challenge for this week? And she said, fine. And she was great. You know, she was great fun, and she was game, and she was ready to go that extra mile. And she said. I said, look, I'm going to give you a challenge over the next seven days. No, she said, because she was telling me about her relationship and how she'd been out of a relationship for some time and had a bit of a difficult situation there. And she said, I haven't had a date in a while. And I said, look, seven days will get you a date. And as we went through this, and she was completely cool about it, but as we went through it and I started telling her what she had to do day by day, because she said, all right, I'm going to do this. I'm going to write the piece. I'm going to say what I did every day, and I'm going to say whether I got the result at the end of it. Now, even as I'm saying this, even as I'm saying, right, day one, you need to do this. Day two, I need you to go here. Day three, I need you to do this. And I'm going into, like, coach mode now, where I have to really figure out, okay, here's what she has to do. I'm a strategist at the end of the day, whether it's working with people in their careers or their love lives, I'm a strategist. I work with people to get the result as quickly as possible. So I'm coming up with this strategy for her, and she's kind of freaking out a little bit because she doesn't want to do it. And she's kind of like, oh, that wouldn't work, or that sounds ridiculous. And she writes about it in her article. I want to encourage you, by the way, to go out and read about this. And there's a reason I'm telling you this, because there's a whole lesson in here I want to tell you about today, but if you get a chance, it's in this month's Glamour magazine and it's actually titled. On the front page you'll see it says, get a date by Saturday. The advice we didn't believe until we tried it. And then we've got this huge headline that says, this was not meant to be a dating story. And a slightly unflattering cartoon of me on the other side. And she wrote about what she did over those seven days, which eventually, after a couple of ups and downs, led to her getting asked out by a very hot Brazilian guy. And she laughed about this. She said, I couldn't believe it happened for me. And I had to keep her accountable a little bit at certain points, send her a text and ask her how she was doing. Did you go out? Did you do this? But she got the result. And this for her was this big revelation. It really blew her mind because suddenly it showed her what was possible. And this leads me to my big point. We don't know what's possible yet because for many of us we haven't achieved what we're setting out to achieve. So we base our beliefs on what's possible by what we've experienced before. Now this person, and she was a really amazing person and we're friends now and you know, we have a good laugh about it together. Her belief about what I would be and about what we would do was based on things she had seen before. So it was very difficult to believe that what we would do would genuinely change her because it wasn't her experience of life. Now that's understandable because we all have experiences of life which teach us what's possible, but it's like teaching us retrospectively, it's not teaching us forward thinking. I want you to imagine it like this. Imagine there's a mirror directly in front of you. And looking in that mirror you can see everything that's behind you. And that's what beliefs are like. It's like looking into the past. Because most beliefs are formed on our experiences so far, we call them reference points. So our beliefs are based on what's happened. Now this mirror in front of us actually blocks us from being able to see what's behind that mirror, what's going on in front. All it does is shines a reflection of what's happened before, what's going on behind us. Sometimes we need someone to push us to one side so that we're not looking in the mirror anymore, so that we're actually looking at what's ahead. That's what's going to make the difference. And people will say, well, sometimes you've just got to have faith that something's going to happen. And the truth is that's very hard. It's very hard to have faith when we've had no experience of something. I'll give you an example. It's hard to believe that men can be trusted if every man in your life has shown you that they can't be trusted. It's difficult to believe that great relationships truly exist if you've never experienced one. It's hard to believe that passion remains in relationships if the relationships you grew up around never showed you that. It's difficult to believe that someone can love you on a truly deep level unconditionally if you haven't felt that. So we have to get into a place where we start to believe that these things are possible. Now how do you do that? The way you do it is you have new experiences. This journalist had a new experience. She came and, you know, to her credit, she decided she was going to try this process. After she came on the event, she said, I can't do this piece now. She had faith in me to say, right, I'm going to go through this seven day process that you've given me. And she went away and she got a result. Now that result was a new result for her. It was something that she wasn't used to and suddenly teaches her that something different is possible. Suddenly she's not looking in the mirror anymore. She's looking at what's in front and there's an excitement that comes with that. But that sort of thing happens when we have a new experience. Now imagine how great my job is that I get to take people through those new experiences. And truthfully, the best part of my job isn't when someone gets the guy. You know, that's like the byproduct. The best part for me is when someone changes their belief about what's possible. When you, you can see it in someone's face when they suddenly start to realize what's possible in their love life, what they can do, it changes things for people. And I light up when I see that because that's real change. Someone could get the guy tomorrow, but if they haven't changed their beliefs, they're probably going to lose him anyway. They're still going to sabotage it. Whereas give me, I'll take anyone any day who has changed their beliefs first because what now happens is it doesn't matter if they get the guy today or tomorrow or next year, they've got a belief that says it's going to happen. And for that reason, it will happen. Now, I have a new mission this year. It's 2012. I have a new mission. My mission is, and I'm always looking for big goals. I want to get 1,000 women into new relationships in the first six months of the year. So I want to create 1,000 new relationships in the first six months. That's a tough challenge, but I like tough challenges. And I'm working with a lot of people right now, and I truly believe it's possible. And if I can do that in the next six months, then I'm going to be proud of what we've achieved as an organization and what I've been able to achieve as a coach. Now, my question to you is, do you want to be one of the thousand? Because I'm looking for people right now who truly want to be one of those people. Now what I need is people who are in a place of saying, I want to make this happen. I'm going to push forward and make this happen. I'm going to give you whatever challenge you set me because those are the people that are going to get results. Just like this person who wrote this article. Those people are going to go and get results. And the truth is, the main place where I get the results is my program. It's the intensive women's weekend, because that's where I get to take people through an entire journey over the course of a weekend. And I don't just get to take them through a few ideas, but I get to take them through exercises and things that genuinely work on people's. Not just the way they look and the way they feel and the way they act, but the way they are internally. What they believe, what they believe about their past, what they believe about their future. You know, if people have got things affecting them, then we change those. So here's what I want to do. Firstly, if you have ever considered coming to join me on my Weekend Live program, I don't care if you're in the UK or anywhere else in the world, if you've ever even considered it and thought it might be something you're interested in, do not do anything yet. Don't go through to the website and sign up for anything. Don't call our team and sign up for anything. There is a reason for this. You won't often hear me saying this. Usually you'll hear me saying, get to the weekend because they're getting more subscribed. They get fully booked every single month now, and we're doing less of them than we ever have. But for this time only, do not do anything. For the next 24 hours, I am putting the finishing touches on something truly special for you. I came into this year thinking how can I deliver something that's really going to change people and offer insane value at the same time? So stay tuned. In 24 hours, I want you to come back to this video because underneath there's going to be a link where you can go through and find out about what I'm talking about. If you've ever considered doing the weekend with me, if one part of you has even been curious about it, come back and visit this because I guarantee there won't be a better opportunity than I'm going to offer you tomorrow. Something truly unique and special that I'm going to do. And by the way, if geographically you're outside of the UK and you've got that kind of, you're not sure if you can travel to, so come and see it. Tune in anyway because it might surprise you. Okay? So I'm excited. I hope you are, too. Set a reminder. Make sure you remember, 24 hours from now, I'm going to be putting a link underneath this video where you can go and find out exactly what I'm talking about. Have an amazing day. In the meantime, I will see you soon.