Matthew Hussey answers a live audience question about receiving unsolicited explicit photos from men. The discussion explores why guys send them, what it signals about their intentions, and how women should respond to protect themselves.
Right now, I'm in the middle of a shoot called the History of the Dick Pick. And if you're watching this video, it.
Means we already released it.
But I wanted to make this video.
Because I wanted people to understand part.
Of the psychology for why we chose this as a topic to make fun of. I didn't realize the whole dick pick thing was such a widespread phenomenon right now in our epoch. Everywhere me and Jameson went on tour, another woman in front of a live audience would ask the question, what do I do when a guy sends me a dick pic, and at first I thought they were joking until every other woman in the audience was like, oh my god, finally someone said it, please answer this question. So whilst we were poking fun of it in the history of the dick pic video from last week, we also were trying to convey a bit of a serious message about how absurd this is on the behalf of men.
So in case we didn't do that.
Very well, which is quite possible, Jameson, because it was ridiculous, we thought we'd also show you how I answered it more seriously in a live seminar. This was from my LA event, the clip I'm about to show you. And it's a woman who asked about this. What do I do when a guy sends me an inappropriate message like this?
Here it is.
I think you'll enjoy it. And I'll see you in next week's video.
I have a question and I was.
A victim of this, like just recently. It's the dick pic phenomenon.
Ah, yes. And I refuse to think that it's some something that I have said or.
Something that I have right.
That he made feel compelled.
Compelled.
To me at 7 a.m. in the morning like a good morning, right?
Guys are such guys are such. Jesus.
And I learned to exit like a lady. So I I told this guy that I had a very great first date and I was expecting a second date. We were planning about it and then there you go, good morning with an eggplant, you know?
So what's your question?
My question is why men are doing this? Is there something out there? Because like I said, I refuse to think that it's something that I said or have done that made him think that that's okay. It first time it happened to me, but I've heard with so many of my girlfriends, they receive a lot. A cocktail.
A cocktail.
It's like being lost in a cabal.
I just imagined a gallery of penises. So, okay, hold up. Just remind me your name. Racelle. Racelle. So Racelle, I don't think that it's somehow like a new thing that guys are doing inappropriate shit. If the guy a hundred years ago could have sent a dick pic, he probably would have. He just would have been wearing a top hat in the photo and had a little cane next to it. It just would have been a very proper dick pic, very formal. The dick pic is an interesting phenomenon. There are degrees, right? If I'm you and a guy that I'm just starting to talk to sends me a dick pic, that's like on the extreme end of the spectrum. I think I'm just gonna delete that guy. I don't think I have any time for that guy. If someone sends a dick pic, it's not the pic of his dick that bothers me really, it's what it says about that guy. There'll be a point in a relationship where probably a dick pic is quite a good thing. You say, oh, this is the man I love's dick in a pic. I'm all about this. By the way, there'll also be times when there'll be people in this room who are just sexting with a guy and having some fun, and that's what's happening, right? That's the thing. Okay, fine. But if a guy, just in an unsolicited way, sends a picture of his penis, I'm looking at that going, what did he think was the best that would happen here. I don't get it. I'm a guy. I don't get it. Look, if I am with you and I'm trying to have some fun immediately and I'm like, I don't want anything more with Raquel. All I want is to have sex with her. I still don't get it. I get being like, hey, you should come over and let's do something. I don't get Here's my penis. Enjoy your breakfast. So I would be looking at that and saying, this is not the sort of person, even if his goals are to sleep with me, this shows a really badly socially calibrated human being. The dick pick thing, I think you write off. Now, let's take a different, I think a more interesting example. is taking a guy who he says, what are you up to? And you say, just getting out of the shower about to go to dinner with my friends. And he says, send me a picture. Right. Now, isn't this a more interesting example? Because the dick pick guy, you're like, like idiot, this guy might not be an idiot. He might just be someone who is Moving too quickly for you. Makes sense? Jamison came up with a wonderful text to send in that situation. He said, you, write back, I think you have me confused with a future me that's been on many more dates with you. Here's what I like about that. So again, the message is, I think you have me confused. with a future me that has been on many more dates with you. Now, I love that because on one hand it says, I would not send you a picture at this stage of the game. It shows your standard. But what it also does very cleverly is it says, but don't go thinking I'm not a sexual person. 'Cause the person who actually invests in me, who I've been on many more dates with, I absolutely am the type of person that would be sexual with you. But that's future me. You have me confused, dear sir. Dick pick guy, I wouldn't even be worried about it. What I'm more interested in is the enormous group of guys who are taking advantage of the fact that there is an anonymity, though it's not full, there is an anonymity and a distance emotionally created by the technology we now have, which allows them to do things in this space that they wouldn't normally do. Those aren't bad guys. They may be slight opportunists. they may be trying their luck, but it doesn't make them bad guys. It makes them guys that need to be educated. You know what I mean? Like, this is the D student you don't even let in the school. Like, no, sorry, this is, I'm not gonna bring you up. But this guy, this guy is the C student that could actually be an A student if you showed him what your standard is. He can become better around you. Make sense? I grab a seat. Thank you so much.
