In this interview Alana recounts her recent 16‑hour journey to the United Arab Emirates for a jiu‑jitsu competition in Abu Dhabi and Dubai. She describes competing in two matches—one against a Brazilian opponent and another against a UAE athlete—winning both, and visiting iconic sites like the Burj Khalifa. Alana reflects on cultural differences she observed, especially women’s dress (headscarves, occasional facial coverings) and the religious context behind them, noting the high‑tech, clean environment of the cities and the presence of mosques with specific visitor rules. She discusses practical challenges of competing while wearing a headscarf, how the competition’s rules affected its use, and how local female athletes balance sport with cultural attire. The conversation then shifts to Alana’s mentorship of a nine‑year‑old student, C, focusing on a recent tutoring session where she struggled to keep the dialogue flowing beyond jiu‑jitsu, recognized the need for prepared backup topics (e.g., airplanes), and considered strategies for building rapport and encouraging the child’s enthusiasm. Throughout, Alana conveys a sense of personal growth, curiosity about cultural norms, and a commitment to improving her tutoring approach.
Chapters
Cool. Yeah, well, congrats on your trip to Dubai and Abu Dhabi. You know, tell us just a little bit about it.
Sure. So I traveled to Abu Dhabi. It was a 16-hour flight. I believe it was like 16, maybe. Yeah, I think 16 hours back too. I weighed in. I had to watch my weight a little, but it wasn't that bad. I weighed in good. I competed, I had 2 matches. I won one by points and one by submission. I won my finals by points, I think. And it was really interesting because I didn't fight anybody from the US. The girls I fought were from Brazil and from the UAE. I got to meet a lot of, a lot of different people and see a lot of different things. And overall, I had a really, really fun trip.
Very cool. So I'm very interested in— do some people say that travel kind of broadens the mind? Would you say traveling to the UAE in some sense broadened your mind at all?
Um, I think so. I think in the sense that I got to see a lot of new things, um, and again, meet a lot of new people and do a lot of new things. I think my mind was broadened in that sense.
Um, how would you say the UAE was similar to the US and then different from the US?
Um, well, first things that are different, their culture is different. So a lot of the women wore different— I mean, they wore the head coverings and the clothes that the women in the US don't usually wear. So it was interesting to be around that type of, or, you know, that type of people. There's some in the US where I live, but Obviously, it's not the primary culture, so not everybody does it. I guess the people were different. The environment was different. Everything. I mean, it was still, I mean, it was really sophisticated. It was really nice. It was really clean. I thought that maybe people would be like watching or observing me a little bit more just because I'm an outsider and a tourist. But I think especially in Dubai, it's kind of a touristy place, so that didn't happen as much. I think Abu Dhabi is less of a tourist area, but it was still awesome. And also, since I was at the venue a lot, there was a lot of foreigners and a lot of tourists. But it's really high-tech, especially in Dubai. There's a lot of, a lot of buildings that were greatly engineered. They were beautiful, beautiful design. I got to go up the Burj Khalifa. I think that's how you say it, which is the tallest building in the world. Visitors aren't allowed to go like to the top top, but I still went like to floor 124 and it was awesome. The view was awesome. But, you know, there's still roads, there's still highways. Everything's like named different. And I had to get used to hearing people speak their language and things like that. But overall, it was really interesting to go to.
Very good. Um, and what's your understanding of why the women dress differently there, why they had scarves and so forth?
Um, I believe it's part of their religion, but I don't understand fully.
Um, was it like dramatically different? Were most of the local women dressed with head scarves and so forth? Uh, yes. Did any of them have kind of full facial covering or not? You didn't see any of that?
A couple of them, but, um, I'm not really sure what the ratio was, but I did see a couple. I feel like it was more common to not have the facial coverings up, and I didn't get to learn why that was, but I was kind of curious as to why some people do and some people don't.
Um, do you think would make a difference, you think, living in that culture as a woman? Well, first, yeah, look, would living in that culture be significantly different as a woman? Or do you think it would make no difference at all?
I think for me, probably, I was surrounded. I mean, when I was at the venue at the competition, there were a lot of women and girls wearing like the headscarves and things while they were competing. So maybe for them, even though they're not where I'm living, they might still have I mean, they still train and I think they probably have still some of the same opportunities that I have here. But again, that might be different for other women and girls that I didn't get to see or maybe don't have the opportunities and chances that I'm given. So I feel like there would probably be a big difference if I grew up there than here.
And just in the most practical sense, I would think, especially kind of— well, were you doing jiu-jitsu or wrestling?
This was jiu-jitsu.
So the scarf— I think in wrestling, like, the scarves would come off, or how do they— is it— are they just tied tightly so they don't come off, or how do they address that?
To be honest, I'm not really sure. In jiu-jitsu, they were coming off, especially if the match was going really hard. And I feel like the ruleset made it go a little harder than other organizations. So I did see a couple head scarves come out, but they didn't seem that strict about putting it on right after. And I'm not really sure how they tie it or anything. I'm not really sure what the importance is, but, um, even there were girls and women competing with the headscarves on. Um, apparently they used to make all of the women, even outsiders, wear the headscarves, but apparently not anymore.
Did you perceive any other cultural differences between, um, say, Americans and UAE residents, or not really?
Um, I mean, besides the major ones like the clothing and then the— actually, no, there was the mosque that people were going to visit. The mosque, when we went to go visit, um, there was a bunch of different rules and regulations that we had to follow. We also saw a lot of different people though. There was a lot of tourists, but it was really interesting to go to. Mm-hmm. But I feel like there's probably more. I just wasn't exposed to it as much.
Mm-hmm. Would you say that you are aware of a different culture from being there, or it's so similar it really doesn't change much of anything?
Well, I think it changed a lot of things. I mean, my environment and the people and things I was around. I was for sure aware that, you know, they have a different religion than I do. And they act different ways than I do in some ways. So I was, you know, fully aware of that. I mean, I tried to learn a little bit more as we went. Um, but yeah, for sure it was really interesting.
When you say they act a little bit different, can you specify ways in which they act a little bit different?
Well, I mean, I don't really know what I meant by act different. I mean, we're all human beings, and I think we did a lot of the same stuff. It's just really culture that was different.
Um, do you think—
I'm not really sure.
Do you think you— there were like mannerisms that are different, or do you think that, um, you— do you think you would know if somebody was— if they were dressed exactly the same, do you think that you would know if somebody was from the UAE rather than US, or really not?
Um, I mean If they were dressed the same way, then maybe not, because again, the US is like really, really— maybe inclusive isn't the right word, but there's a lot of racial differences between people, and sometimes it's hard to determine whether people are from the US or from other countries. Or sometimes I have that when I go to international tournaments. But to be honest, not really. If they were dressed Maybe like I was, I didn't really, I couldn't be sure.
Got it. Got it. And just to check in on a very different thing, have you had a chance to mentor C at all, the 9-year-old?
I did this week. We got back to it because I got back on Sunday. I think my opinion on this week's session was that it went okay. We both competed this month, and I haven't had a chance to talk to him about it. Um, until Wednesday. So I asked him how it went. I believe he got third place. Um, and I asked him what his feelings were on that and how he felt about that. I shared that I had placed first in my division and, um, he congratulated me. I was gonna stay on that topic for a little while longer. Um, but I couldn't find anything else to talk about it. I mean, I kind of spiraled to a couple different things that I feel like weren't really connected. Or as connected as I would have liked it to be. So I think this week's session was kind of all over the place, but I didn't have a set topic that I wanted to talk about besides jiu-jitsu, and I thought that would last a little longer. But I think next week I'm going to come a little more prepared with like follow-up questions and things like that so I don't get so lost. I don't think I have enough experience right now to just kind of freestyle.
Yeah, very well put. I mean, this is common. Um, would you say you were building rapport in terms of the ease of conversation was going back and forth more easily and he was kind of more open and comfortable talking with you?
I think in the beginning when we were talking about jiu-jitsu, I think that's probably when, where I would put that. Um, because I mean, it's a common thing, both of us do it. Maybe he's not as much of a competitor as I am, but he's also younger. Um, so he might not enjoy it as much as I do. We might have different feelings on jiu-jitsu, but we still do it. We still do the same sport.
Um, did you talk about his airplane at all? In airplanes?
Uh, not this week. I didn't.
Okay. No problem. But I think it is always good to have backup topics. Yeah. You know, if, if your main topic doesn't go well and so, um, not that it doesn't go well, but it doesn't go as long as deeply as you want. And so you might kind of, because you don't know very much about airplanes, is that correct?
Not as much as him, for sure.
Yeah. So you might at least, you know, it might be good to have an interesting lead conversation. And then, you know, you might think of questions on airplanes and get him to really explain the whole world of airplanes to you more and more and more. And that way, because my bet is he's probably going to be enthusiastic because that's something he likes. Um, and that way, you know, if you can get in there and get something really going with them, um, you know, that's maybe on history or something a little bit more intellectual, that's great. But if not, then you're prepared with lots of different airplane questions. And the way I think of it is I try to understand somebody else's world, you know. So for instance, I don't know jiu-jitsu or wrestling that well, and so sometimes I've talked to you about or asked you about you know, what are the rules and how do you train and how do you compete and, you know, things like that because that's your world and you know it and I don't know it. So does that make sense that as sort of a backup, and I say as a backup because that's a likely thing that he'll talk about and it's always nice to try something kind of a new frontier first. And then if the new frontier, you know, peters out after a few minutes, then you've got this other thing. Does it make sense?
Yes, for sure.
Are you enjoying doing it?
Yeah, um, I'm having a really good time. Uh, sometimes it's, uh, challenging or hard, but, um, I, I still enjoy it for sure.
And is it challenging or hard just because you don't know kind of what questions to ask and how to move things forward?
Yes, exactly.
But you enjoy kind of having your mind alive thinking about these things?
Yeah, yeah, for sure.
Okay, I think it's really cool. Um, and yeah, congrats on both your success in the UAE and your travel. Uh, and I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving.
