A comedian reads the ingredient labels on store-bought Easter eggs and finds glucose syrup, dextrose, beef gelatin, sodium pyrophosphate, and palm oil. He calls it sugar wrapped in sugar, warns the additives stress your kidneys, and jokes that you're feeding your kids a horse tranquilizer.
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What the fuck are in these Easter eggs, and why are we giving them to kids? Welcome to the Easter edition of What the Fuck Is That? All right, let's crack this thing open. Let's look at the marshmallow first. Ingredients: glucose syrup, which is liquid sugar because normal sugar wasn't sweet enough; sugar, backup sugar, obviously; water— that's about the only innocent ingredient in this egg. Next is dextrose, another sugar. We're 3 sugars deep now. Next up we have beef gelatin, which is kind of ironic because your bunny treat is being held together by a cow. Next is sorbitol, and that's a sugar alcohol that can get your digestive system moving, if you get what I mean, if you overdo it. But we all know that kids have such good self-restraint, right? Next up, we have free-range egg whites. I'm so glad they used free-range eggs. That must make this such a healthy product. Next, we have sodium pyrophosphate. Not so great for the kidneys. And then they've just got flavoring. That could be anything. Even the manufacturer is not making eye contact. And lastly, colorants. Again, a mystery sandwich. And that's just the marshmallow. Let's look at the chocolate. The first ingredient is sugar. Again, Obviously. Next up, they've got full cream milk powder. Fair enough, although I shudder to think about the process behind that. Next up, they've got cocoa butter and cocoa mass. Finally, something resembling chocolate. After that, they've got whey powder, which I have my own opinions on, but it's not necessarily bad for you. After that is vegetable fat composed of palm fat, shea butter, sal butter, mango kernel fat. So just pack as much fat as you can in this product because it's all going to get stored in your body. Then there's soy lecithin as an emulsifier. Most soybeans these days are GMO, so— Oh my God. And lastly, flavoring, the other end of the mystery sandwich. So in summary, it's sugar wrapped in sugar covered in sugar, held together by a cow and some chemistry. And we hand this to kids like, happy Easter, here's the opposite of a horse tranquilizer, and good luck to your little liver. See you on the next episode of What the Fuck Is That? Because you deserve to know.
