What Are You Choosing?

Welcome to A New Life podcast with Pamela Jean, where it's all about empowering women to empower more women. Get ready, friends, to create a new life. And here is your host, Pamela Jean.

Hello, friends. Welcome to this week's episode of A New Life podcast. Today, we're going to ask the question, what are you choosing? So your life is made up of all the little tiny choices that you have made along the way that essentially has made up your life. And it's made up, you know, exactly where you are in your life today. One of the common denominators of every single choice that we have made, whether it be a good choice or a bad, bad choice, is you. You are the common denominator. You were there for all the good ones, and you were also there for all of the bad ones. And it's easy for us to focus on blaming other people and not wanting to take responsibility for the choices that we have made. But I promise you, when you start really wrapping your head around the choices that you have made and understand why you have made them, life will take on a different pace for you. So think back to the job that you chose, and you chose it for the wrong reason. You wish after getting into it, maybe even a week or two weeks, that, God, I wish I wouldn't have taken this job. I wish I would have waited for something different or something better. But now you're in it 10 years later, and you're still doing that job that for the last 10 years, you've never really, really liked. Think back to dinner last night, and you chose to eat dessert, even though you know you shouldn't be having dessert because maybe you have high blood pressure, maybe you are diabetic, but yet you still chose the dessert. And let's get into something a little bit more on the personal level. That you chose to go on the first date with that person that potentially wasn't correct for you, and then you opted for the second date. And here you are, five years down the road, still dating, but you're still in that relationship that really isn't the best relationship for you. And how about this? You choose to stay up too late watching Netflix just because you sat in front of the couch and didn't feel like getting up, and you stayed up too late watching tv, and then you're late to work today. So every place that we are in our life, whether it be a good place or a bad place, you got there because of your choices. You made those decisions. You had that dessert. You decided to take the job that Maybe it paid more money, but it isn't fulfilling. You get up every day and you don't want to go to work. Or let's say you went on that date because you just retired of being lonely, you were tired of being alone, so you went on that date. And now you're five years in. And you know it's not the right relationship, you know it's not the person you should be with. But you're there because now you have five years invested. Now what do you do? Now you're facing an upset employer or an upset supervisor or boss because you were late to work. Not just today, but the 10th time this month. You know, it's important that we start to think about the long term effects of all of the little choices that you make every day. If you are a diabetic, choosing dessert all of the time is clearly not in your best interest. You know, I'm not anti dessert, trust me, I enjoy my ice cream just like the best, like the best of them. But that reality is if we had dessert every day, physically we are abusing our bodies. We're not taking good care of ourselves. And then if you have an underlining issue of diabetes or heart condition or whatever it is, you know dessert is not good for you long term. So start to think about the long term effects of all the little choices that you make every single day. By not exercising, by exercising too much, by having dessert not just once, but too much dessert because that happens too. And think about the choice and the decision of allowing people in your life that are not good for you. And your intuition and your gut is telling you that they shouldn't be a part of your life. But you've made the choice and the decision to allow them to be there. Why? Why are you making those decisions? When you have a place of healthy self love, you will make much better decisions because you will know. I love myself enough that I'm going to get out of the job I don't enjoy and I'm going to pursue something that sets me on fire. I'm going to stop listening to the negative self talk and I'm going to go after the dream that I know will serve me best and serve others best. I'm not going to overindulge in dessert because with my diabetes it's going to cause a problem. You start making decisions out of love for yourself and they ultimately are better choices and better decisions. Choose your attitude. Every day you get to choose the attitude in which you're going to live by. You're Going to choose how you see the world. Something bad happens to you today. What is your attitude? Do you throw up your arms and say, oh, I knew it, I knew it. This always happens. It's never good. You know what? We're going to have bad things happen to us. But how you respond to those bad things is where the lesson is learned. I can't think of a bad thing that happened to me that didn't end up serving me in one way or the other. So the bad things that happen to you, I want you to ask yourself, is this happening for me? How is this happening for me? Not to you, but for you. That's so important to ask yourself that question, because choosing attitude and how you're going to respond to adversity, how you're going to respond to fear, how you're going to respond to anxiety. You get to choose that. And that's what's so incredible about it. You are in so much control and in so much in charge of your own life. It is amazing. Start finding the fun in life. And if you feel like, you know what, 2020 has not been a whole lot of fun, well, you know what? You're right. It hasn't been a lot of fun. There's been a lot going on this year for us to complain about and for us to feel down about. But that's going to go back to choosing your attitude. How are you going to look at 2020? It taught us a lot. It has taught us so much. And just stop and think about what 2020 has taught you. Personally, for me, I will never take for granted simple things like going to dinner, just a night out with girlfriends, live music, going to concerts, sitting at the movie theater. Those little things in life that we have had to abruptly stop and we have not gotten to do for many, many, many months. I'm not going to take those things for granted. If it weren't for Covid, I wouldn't have a podcast right now. Having a podcast was something that was on my radar. It was on a back burner. It was there. It's been there for many years. But Covid was like, you know what? You are going to be shut in and you are not going to be able to do what you wanted to do right now in your business. So you're going to start your podcast. So I sat down one week and I figured it out. I figured out how to create air and host a podcast. I probably would not have done that if it weren't for Covid, because I was allowing the technological Challenges of creating a podcast hold me back from doing it. And that was a choice. That was my decision to allow my fear of understanding technology well enough to be able to do my own podcast. I allowed my fear to make that decision. I wish I could tell you how many people have reached out to me because of this podcast and have said, I'm so grateful you're doing this. This has helped me in so many ways. I've learned so much about myself. I look forward to your weekly podcast. What a blessing. What a blessing that is to me and to the people that listen to this podcast. But if it weren't for Covid, it would still be on the back burner. So, friends, you get to make a choice. Every single day. Every single day, you get to make a choice. And you can start with baby steps. I'm not saying you have to go and make radical changes and radical choices. I'm not suggesting that at all. But commit yourself to baby steps, to changing your life. And get ready, friends, to take some action when you commit yourself to those baby steps. At the end of the day, we all get to decide what kind of day we are going to have. And if you are living an authentic life and you are being true and honest to yourself and true and honest to who you are, you will start making better choices to better serve yourself. Love yourself enough to make good choices for yourself. Love yourself enough to put up healthy boundaries around yourself. Love yourself enough to show yourself the same compassion that you would show a friend, a family member, or one of your children or grandchildren. Why is it that we don't hold ourselves high enough, with high enough regard to treat ourselves how we would treat other people? We self sabotage. We make bad choices. Even though we know it's not good for us, we still make those choices. Why do we do that? It all boils down to loving yourself from the inside out. It is so important, friends, that you take a step back and you learn to love yourself with the same passion and the same ferocity as you love your children, as you love your grandchildren. I know that's kind of a heavy topic and it's hard to know where to begin when it comes to loving yourself. But I will tell you this. It is a choice. Number one, you will choose to love yourself. Self love does not mean that it's selfish love. It does not mean that at all. It means that you love yourself enough to learn what makes you happy, to learn what makes you tick from the inside out. And it's so important when you learn to love yourself from the inside out. And it is a process. It's not easy. It is definitely a process. But when you learn to love yourself from the inside out, you will be able to love others in a way that is far beyond anything you could ever comprehend. And here's the biggest thing, you are going to allow other people into your world and to accept their unconditional love when you have healthy boundaries. And that's the key, is to have healthy boundaries is to not allow yourself to be violated, to be taken advantage of. Friends, I promise you, if you commit yourself to start making baby steps towards living that authentic life and self love, it will be a decision that you will have wished you made many, many years ago. So friends, thank you so much for joining me. This was a short and sweet podcast. I'm so glad you're here. I hope you're doing well and making it through this pandemic. I think better days are on the horizon, friends, and that is a choice that I am making to know that better things are coming our way. So make it a great day friends, and thanks for joining me on this week's podcast.

Thank you for joining us today on a New Life podcast. We will see you next time.