Pete Alexander2x TEDx Speaker and best-selling author helping transform burned out workers into engaged colleagues.

Stress Relief Tool - Kindness Matters

17 Mar 2021 · 2 min

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2:10

In this motivational monologue, the speaker uses an IKEA 30‑day plant experiment—where one plant was verbally bullied and another complimented—to illustrate how words affect wellbeing. Citing estimates that 15‑33% of people experience bullying during childhood, the speaker notes that bullying often continues into workplaces and personal relationships, causing a spectrum of negative emotions for victims (anger, sadness) and guilt for perpetrators whose behavior stems from insecurity. The talk then pivots to a solution: choosing kindness. Drawing on Randall McNeely’s book The Kindness Giver’s Formula, the speaker argues that kindness benefits both the receiver and the giver, fostering happiness, hope, and a ripple effect of love, unity, and peace. The message concludes with a reminder to extend kindness to oneself, reducing stress and increasing overall happiness.

Chapters

A few years ago, IKEA conducted a 30-day study where people were asked to bully one plant and compliment another using only their words. The end result was amazing. While the complimented plant continued to thrive, the bullied plant was visibly struggling. Many of us have been bullied at some time in our life. Estimates range from 15 to 33% when we were growing up. Unfortunately, some of that bullying doesn't stop once we get out of school. It happens in the workplace and also in personal relationships. Bullying adds unnecessary stress to our lives. If we are the ones being bullied, we will experience a whole range of negative emotions ranging from anger to sadness. If we are the ones who are doing the bullying, this is likely because we are compensating for some insecurity in our lives. And once we realize just how hurtful the bullying can be, we likely will experience guilt over our actions. What if instead of bullying, we chose kindness? In his book, The Kindness Giver's Formula, Randall McNeely says that when we choose kindness, we bless the lives of all those whom we show kindness. We will experience greater feelings of happiness and hope. We will have an impact for good in everyone within our sphere of influence, and the effects will ripple out from there. We'll set in motion the opportunity to restore light, love, unity, and peace in our environment, making it a much better and happier place to live. And when you choose kindness, remember to be kind to yourself as well, and enjoy less stress and more happiness along the way.