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Accuse An Alcoholic of Relapse

14 Aug 2024 · 0 min

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0:16

A short excerpt from a YouTube video by Amber Hollingsworth about how people accused of relapse often respond defensively. Amber explains common defensive phrases (e.g., “if you're never going to forgive me, then just forget it,” “how long is it going to take me to get your trust?”) and notes that those defensive moves can further trigger the loved one because the loved one needs something different in that moment. The clip focuses on interpersonal reactions and emotional needs during relapse accusations.

They're defensive. And then they'll say things like, look, if you're never going to forgive me, then just forget it. This isn't going to work. Or, like, how long is it going to take me to get your trust? Or, you know, it's like nothing I ever say or do is good enough for you. They'll be defensive towards you, which then triggers the loved one more, because what they're really needing is something else in that moment.