Amber Hollingsworth explains why you break promises to yourself: it's not weakness, but how shame and your brain's rationalizations trap you in cycles. Willpower alone won't fix it. She offers an alternative mental tool to fight back.
If you've never been able to make a promise to yourself and keep it, it's not a character flaw. It's not a character defect. Something else is going on. I see people carry so much shame about this. They want to stop. They don't know why they can't just stop. They get mad at themselves over and over and over, and then they decide that the answer must be that they're broken or weak or that they don't really want it bad enough. But that's not really what's happening here. What's happening is You're fighting a battle against your own brain, and you're fighting it with a weapon that's just not working properly. So today I want to give you a different weapon on how to combat this little rationalization that keeps tripping you up and getting you in trouble every single time, because you can't really willpower your way out of it.
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