This content was created by Amber Hollingsworth. This content was uploaded by Amber Hollingsworth. This is a YouTube video titled "Is This the Cure For Addiction? 😮" created on November 23, 2021, by Amber Hollingsworth. The video discusses the nature of addiction, its impact on relationships, and the importance of community in recovery. Amber explains how addiction initially seems to solve problems but eventually leads to isolation and dependency, emphasizing the need for connection as a path to healing.
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When you first start using substances or engaging in whatever thing that ends up being addictive to you, it actually works for you at first, right? It feels like it solves a problem. You may feel like it makes you a better version of yourself. You may feel like it gives you more creative, it makes you more friendly, you're more popular, or maybe even work harder, longer at work. The substance or the addiction becomes the answer to your problems. And you know what? I'm not gonna lie. It definitely will work for, for some time, but eventually it stops working. So let's take a look at how that happens and how to get back on track. For those of you who are new here, welcome to Put the Shovel down. I'm Amber Hollingsworth, and this YouTube channel is designed to help you understand the science and psychology of addiction from every single angle. We talk about addiction from the science perspective, from the psychological perspective, and from the the individual and family perspectives. I want you to understand this thing inside and out so that you are always five steps ahead of it. Now, in order to take a real hard look at how does addiction get us so far off track and how do we get back? We're going to have to go way back and get a little scientific here. You see, human beings are designed naturally to get a lot of, maybe even most of their needs met through relationship with other human beings or other entities or organizations. We're wired up like that because humans don't survive very well on our own. We need other people. So we're designed to attach to other people. We need other people for protection and support and comfort and acceptance and a sense of self esteem. Humans are made to live in groups or tribes, and the function of those groups is to provide all of these things for the members inside. Now all of a sudden, when you find this love that you have, this addiction or substance or whatever it is, you start going to that substance to get all of those needs met. And then, which is what starts a complete breakdown of everything. Because as you continue to go to the addictive thing to get your needs met, it becomes less and less and less effective. And where it used to be a great solution to your problems, it becomes not so great of a solution. And to make matters worse, the problems that you're dealing with get bigger and bigger and bigger, and it's your only solution. So now you're going back to it more frequently, more often, you need it more. You are dependent on this addiction for your survival. So the solution works less, the problems get more. And let's just make Matters even a slight bit more complicated. As if that weren't bad enough right now, when you take a look at the people around you, the people in your tribe, the people in your group that were initially designed to help meet those needs for you, you're not going to them anymore, at least not in the same way. And they start to notice that they feel you detaching from them and getting distant from them. And then they start talking to you about it and coming after you and chasing you down and trying to pull you back in. And the more you do that, the more angry you get at them and the more you want to pull away from them because you want this solution over here, because it seems to work so much better. And the more you do, the more you burn bridges with your family, your friends, your loved ones, your community. At best, you're emotionally pushing them away, and at worst, you're doing some major things to cause big problems in those relationships. And sometimes we even burn those bridges for good. And to be honest, that's the tragedy of the whole situation. Because it is the people, the group, the tribe, the loved ones that have the ability and the power to heal you back to yourself. You see, connection is the opposite of addiction. And somewhere along the way, we lost our connection with our people and our loved ones. And we went over here and we connected to this substance. But the problem is, it's like a bad relationship now. You've got yourself completely connected and isolated, you and your relationship with this substance. But it's an abusive relationship, right? It's nice to you sometimes, and it's mean to you other times. And it makes you push away everyone else around you that's important to you, tells you all kind of lies, beats you up, makes you feel terrible about yourself. Addiction can and will break you. And I know it feels like it's the only thing that helps bring you comfort. But you know what? That in and of itself is a big problem. You've gotten to the point where it is the only thing that brings you comfort and all that other stuff you're doing in your life. It's just stuff that you're doing, passing the time before you can get to the addictive substance or behavior or whatever it is. Do you really want. Want to live like that? It's not even that helpful anymore, is it? You gotta make a choice. Are you gonna choose your relationship with the addiction or everything else? Because that's what addiction does. It makes you choose. It's this or everything else. Or are you gonna choose everything else and not have this. Now, when it boils down to it, that's the decision that you have to make. Now, if you're watching this video because you have an addicted loved one, I want you to understand that it is the power of community that can help bring someone back from the addiction. Because it's the other way they can decide to start getting their needs met. Whether that's the community in the family or that's the community of AA or some other kind of support group. We've got to find a better way to feel better. Now, beating your loved one up and making them feel terrible about themselves and isn't helping them get better. In fact, it's just pushing them closer and closer and closer to the addiction. Now, if you or a loved one is struggling and you're caught in this process, make sure that you check out the link in the description to our free resources. There are tons of resources there that can help you figure out how do you turn yourself out of this terrible process. And up next, I want you to watch this video on addiction and attachment, because it takes an even deeper dive into what I'm telling you now so you can understand it even better.
