Amber Hollingsworth explains how self-judgment traps people in addiction cycles. When you fail repeatedly, shame convinces you that you're broken. Self-compassion instead of self-criticism is what actually lets you keep trying.
You get frustrated. You're like, I'm tired of hearing you talk about this because you never do anything about it. And if you can stay out of that judgment place about that, then you can hang in there a lot longer. And this especially applies if this is a conversation you're having with yourself about change, because when we even look at ourselves making the same mistake over and over and over, it's easy for us to think, well, I guess I didn't really want to do that, or I I guess I'm not even capable of doing that. And we start to develop all this negative self-talk and that really gets in our way and it makes it that much harder to change and it makes it that much longer until we get there. And sometimes people actually will stop trying because we just convince ourselves that we're not capable.
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