Communication coach Raele Altano teaches a three-part formula to stop spiraling after you mess up: acknowledge and apologize, give brief context if needed, then say what you'll do differently. Spiraling happens because you're seeking validation. Keep it to 2-3 sentences.
This year I want you to stop spiraling with over explanations and self deprecation every single time you make a mistake. Here's how we're gonna do it. If your mistake isn't life threatening or complete and utter betrayal, I want you to keep your response to two to three sentences max, One sentence to acknowledge the mistake and apologize if necessary. Second sentence to add some context or give a very brief explanation if you think you need to, and a third sentence for what you're gonna do about it or the solution. It looks something like this thank you so much for catching that. I had a lot going on yesterday and didn't have a chance to look at this as closely as I normally would have. I'll have it corrected for you by the end of the day. Or I'm sorry for raising my voice. I'm working on doing better with that over explaining or being self deprecating is probably happening because you're trying to seek validation that you're still a good person despite your mistake. When you don't get that immediate validation, you keep going on and on. You're rambling, you're repeating yourself, hence the spiraling. Try this formula. Keep your responses to two to three sentences max and let me know how it goes. And if you're interested in one on one coaching to support you with the mindset behind all of this and some more customized tools and tips, use the link in my bio to book a one on one session. I'm well with Rael, your communication coach, and I hope this was helpful.
