Raele Altano on telling a friend they aren't a bridesmaid. Skip the explanations unless they ask. Frame it as inclusive, offer them something real to do instead, like bachelorette planning or a symbolic role. Keep the friendship intact with positive language.
Situations can be tough. I have a few suggestions here. First one is to simply not say anything at all and avoid over explaining yourself unless the person approaches you saying they were upset they weren't included. As a bridesmaid, this is one of those things that doesn't necessarily need a conversation, and over explaining yourself or your reasoning might actually make things worse. Second suggestion would be to approach this from a place of inclusion versus Exclusion. Instead of saying we're not close enough for you to be my bridesmaid, you can say something like I care so much about our friendship and I'd love to include you in another aspect of my wedding planning. Maybe it's bachelorette planning duties. Or maybe they can have a responsibility on the day of the wedding to give them a little something special. I even heard of this great idea recently where brides tell those who aren't in their wedding party to be their something blue so they can wear a blue dress or maybe a blue accessory to commemorate being the bride something blue and still have an active role in some way. Point is, approach it from a place of inclusivity and positivity versus exclusion and negativity. The way you phrase and present something makes a world of difference. Good luck and congratulations.
