"Who are You Spending Life With?" Insights from Randy Garn

Welcome to the Gentleman Project podcast. I'm Cory Moore.

And I'm Kirk Chug. Buckle up. Today we've got Mr. Randy Garn in the podcast studio today. Randy and Corey and I have known each other for years and years. Randy is a bundle of energy. He's been on the podcast before, was actually one of our very, very first guests, has served on the Gentleman Project board with us. Super passionate about his fatherhood, intentionality. As well connected as anybody you're ever going to meet in your personal life. You know, the people that he knows and the things that they're doing, just an amazing reach into, into goodness in this world. So, Randy Garn, welcome to the podcast today, man.

Dude, I love being here. Are you kidding me?

He walks into the room and it's just like the energy level just goes up.

If I get to hang out with Corey and Kirk, I mean, I'm, I'm here anytime. I mean, we could do this every day, all week long.

Well, I have to thank you because I think you've probably been the number one refer of other amazing people on the podcast.

Yeah, we've had some awesome people.

We're going to keep them coming too, fellas. We're going to keep them coming.

I know. I love that.

How about one next week?

Got one for you.

Great. That's awesome. Well, Randy, since you've been on the podcast, you've been doing a lot of things. Anybody that follows Randy? Randy, I mean, just, you got like 450,000 Instagram followers or something. Like, there's a lot of people that follow what Randy does, and he's always hanging out with cool people. He's always trying to make a difference and bringing good into the world. What have you been up to? And then we want to kind of talk about one of the. What are the things that you've been learning as a dad lately?

You know, the main, the main thing that I've, I've been up to is trying to be the best version of myself possible. And I think because of that, opportunities have just exploded and now it's just really figuring out what things you're really going to dial in on. Get your hands on the meatloaf on, and go deep on. On certain things. So I think the better person you become, the better human you become, the more clarity you get, the more crystal clear you get on what you should be focusing on in your life. And so I've really taken this, I've really taken, honestly, even this month to spend a lot of time on that. Like, who am I becoming. Who am I spending my time with, and what are the biggest things that I want to accomplish in my life right now? So it's been. It's been a fun journey.

We got on that list. Actually, can we talk about this? Because Corey and I were just talking about this right before the podcast. You've spent some time, like, in your own head, right?

Yeah.

And alone, Corey.

Yeah, I have a hard time finding time from alone time. Right. Which you have to have. Yeah, my. My main time is as soon as I get here early, before everybody else gets here, I have a few minutes in my brain to go through my calendar and think through the week and that kind of thing. And the less time I have to do that, the worse life gets. Yeah. Like, you gotta have your. You gotta have time to think about what matters most and prioritize your time, and if you don't do that, it starts to break. It feels like, to me, you just.

Become, like, default you.

Right.

You're just. You're just going through the motions of meetings and task lists and, you know, it's just not organized, not purposeful. It gets. It gets ugly. And I was telling Kirk right before the podcast started, I feel like I've, like, moved in the wrong direction that way. Like, I have less strategic time, and I need more strategic time. Yeah.

You know, Well, I can help you with that.

I know you can. I've read. I've read all the books.

No, just because I'm going through it myself, bro. I mean, it's.

So talk to us.

It's like. It's like figuring out, honestly, what are the things that matter most in your life? And I always say, who am I spending the most time with? And are those people the ones that matter? So I audit a lot of people, have a lot of people in their lives, have business strategy, but there's not a lot of people. What I teach a lot of is, what's your human strategy? What's your people strategy? Who are those that you love liking most, and how much time are you spending with them? So, I mean, for example. I mean, I'll give you a real case example. Like. Like, you. I am so booked. Like, I'm. This summer is bananas. I got six kids, two sets of twins. We got soccer, golf, ballet, all kinds of stuff. I'm looking at my calendar. I'm like, man, I gotta go see my dad, who's aging, and he lives up in Salmon on the river where he wants to be. And I look at my calendar, I'm like, when am I Going to see him next. So this weekend, I literally made a conscious effort. I moved all my meetings on Thursday night and Friday, and I packed my twin boys up, and we went up and saw my dad. And I just tried to shut everything down this weekend because let's say I see my dad. Let's see. My dad's, like, you know, 88 years old, and let's see. I see him three times a year. I mean, you look at that, I may see him 15 more times if I keep up that pace. So I need to actually do more with him. I need to spend more time with him. He's my hero. He's a freaking legend. He's Coach Garn. He's the original Coach Garn. Like, I love my dad. He spent time with me when I was a kid. He taught me so many things about God, about relationships, about integrity, about hard work. And so I'm like, who. Who's important to me? Get in the car, boys. We're going. We had a blast. You know, we had so much fun. And so I think those are the things that sometimes as business leaders and really, really focused entrepreneurs, we also need to ensure that we're scheduling time to take our wives out. You know, we're scheduling time with our amazing daughters. It's. It's so heavy being an entrepreneur and being a dad. And they, like, that's. That's where the tension comes from. It's just like, I have all this work, and then all of a sudden, you're missing the life with them, so you have to make that intentional. And I always say, if you don't have your strategy on one page, you don't have a strategy. So I actually have a. I have a personal strategy of my inner circle. Who are my top top five people on my phone list? I have my top 25 list. You know, the very top one is, guess what, My wife. And that. That's. I've got it listed down. I actually go through my top 25, and I prioritize them so that when I need to, like, follow up with stuff, that is who I'm. That's literally who I'm talking to, and that's who I'm spending life with. And so I think that's. That's what we need to do a little bit more of, is really make a conscious effort for our personal relationships as a strategy. Yeah.

Amen. So what do you find yourself doing when you get off course? Right? Like, when you aren't as purposeful in your strategy as you ought to be? What do you do, do you make a conscious effort to make some time to refocus? Now I'm sure you've got habits now in your life because I know you well enough to know this, but you've got habits in your life, right. That allow you to continue to be. Put your pri. The right priorities first, right. And to focus on the family and to think to yourself, I better go visit my dad. Right? So talk to the listeners about what are some of those habits that keep you from getting off track on your strategy.

I think as an entrepreneur and as a business leader and as a father and as a husband, I don't know if we'll ever find perfect life balance. I don't because there are things that come and go. I mean, even last night I had a few things that needed a. Needed my attention. And I was in the office till 7:30. But I made sure to get up, I made sure to put my boys to bed. I made sure to get up and make them breakfast this morning and spend time with them. I think it's ensuring that you spend good, quality, quality time. But I don't believe, I don't know if there's a work life balance. There's. But for me there's a work life harmony is more. I love the people I'm working with. I love my wife and my family. And it's not always going to be easy, right? But I think that work life harmony is just like everybody understands, like I'm an entrepreneur and this is who I am. And when I'm on vacation, I may need to jump on a call, I may need to do a little business trip to write it off or whatever it may be, you know, but my wife understands that and we have clarity together and we understand each other and there's no confrontation that's just like, oh my gosh, you're doing this or that. It's just like, no, we understand each other. And so I think sometimes we have to think about our lives as a work life harmony. And also I think it's really important just to communicate clearly to your family what those expectations are. It's like they understand how you treat them. And so I think it's learning how to treat them and be very, very present when you do have time with those that matter most, that you're not on your phone, that you're not doing other things, that you're literally there. Just because you're with them doesn't mean you're there, if that makes sense. So I have been really, really, really trying to be, especially with my, my twin boys that are 11 and my twin girls are 14. I mean, my, yeah, my twin girls are 14. Like, just being present and looking them in the eye and asking them how they're doing, how are you really doing? And not just doing that lip service, but also try to do that with my really important business relationships and partnerships and ensure that I'm doing the same thing for them. I, I, I have a lot of people ask me, they say, you know, do you ever want to work with your friends or your family? And I, my thing is, heck yes. I only want to work with my friends and my family. I only want to work with those people that I love, like, and respect. And so I think those are the things that help you have that work life harmony, where it's out of balances, where you have anger in your heart or you have frustration going on. Now, I'd say if there is those things, make sure you take a deep breath and clear those things out. Have the hard discussions, have those hard things that get you in complete alignment so that you can have the clarity and the joy in your heart, joy in your head, clarity in your mind, and to really, really crush it. And what you're doing, a lot of.

It is about intention, too, right? Like what your family, if they see you maybe working on a family vacation or something like that, like, they know that your intention and that your desire is to be present with them as much as possible and what those expectations are, because an expectation not set as an expectation not met. Right, Right. So one of the things that I wanted to ask you today is you spend a lot of time around a lot of really cool people doing a lot of really cool things, and they're doing really cool things, and they're changes. How have you brought your kids into your world and helped them to learn some of the things that you're learning? Because I think Corey and I, like, we're pretty blessed. Like, we get to hang out with some pretty cool people. And the podcast is really cool, too. But, like, what we do for a living, we're around people that aren't sitting around, like, watching Maury Povich in the middle of the day. Sorry, if you like Maury Povich. But, like, we're around people that are really interesting. They're doing really cool things. And one of the things that I want to do with my kids and what so this is a personal question of how you've done this. How do you pull your kids into the world that you get to work in and Glean some of those really, really cool, like, life lessons and the things that you learn from other people that you hang around with. How do you get your kids dialed into that, too?

You know, here's a few real world examples. I was speaking at a pretty large mastermind out in Puerto Rico, and. And I invited my daughter to come with me. Why? I've burned my wife out on business dinners and things. So now I get to take my kids.

She doesn't like Ryber chicken anymore.

So, I mean, it's Char's like, I get. You get. You get two events. You get two events a month, and you got a lock of. So, you know, and you guys know how that is. So now I get to take my daughters and I. I want them to be involved in those type of things. So I took my oldest daughter to a mastermind in Puerto Rico, and she has interest in writing a book. And so there was a lot of really amazing authors and speakers and influencers that are doing really amazing things in human performance. She was 18 years old, and she is a high performer, and I love her to death. So I said, hey, do you mind if I give Grace a few minutes on stage? I'm speaking. So I said, I'm going to have her come and share a few things from a child's perspective. And she shared with the whole audience of. Because she wants to write a book on how parents should deal with kids with anxiety, depression, and, I mean, those kind of disorders on how parents should talk to their kids. And so I got her. She stood up and she said, hey, I'm gonna write a book. This is what I'm gonna do. And she shared with them. She did a Q and A. And it blew everyone away. It's like, for me, like, my heart just rejoiced. My daughter's on stage just crushing it and having that confidence. And so I think as fathers, we have to intentionally find I include my kids in everything. Another example is I had some pretty awesome people come out that are huge. Really amazing actress in. One of the top actresses in Mexico. And another gentleman that came out had a few people flying from the UK and I invited them to our house for dinner.

Now, you talked about this on your first podcast, about how if you come, like, you're coming over to the Garn house, right?

You are coming to the Garn house is completely open. The good, the bad, the ugly, everything. And so I said, hey, why don't you guys come to dinner? And they had the best time ever with our kids. They loved it. You Know, they're looking to get married. They're looking at anything, so. But we had such an amazing time. That was our favorite thing. And then they're like, hey, can we hang out with your kids? And then the next day, like, can we go to church with you guys? So then they ended up coming to church with us and, like, having a really, really fun, just fun experience. And so I think those kind of things. I'm seeking opportunities to be well rounded in including my family in all aspects of my life. I don't compartmentalize work, my play, my religion, my leisure. It's all one. I'm always working, I'm always playing. I'm always trying to just make stuff happen while I'm here on this earth one single time.

Have you always been that way or did that come over time? Like, was that somewhat inherent to you to just be a goer, as I might call it?

You know, I think when God made me, he did put a little extra drop of, like, he did put a little extra drop of juice in.

So, I mean, it wasn't battery acid. It was like, it was explosives.

It wasn't battery acid or anything. But I. I do remember, you know, when I was growing up, my dad was a high school football coach. So we would literally say family prayers and we'd put all our hands in the middle and be like, go, Garns you. And he always. He was such a champion. Like I said, he's a great example. I just want. I want to be the kind of father he was. And I know not everybody has amazing fathers, but I want to be that type of father with my kids. For me, success is those that love you the most and know you the most want to spend time with you. And I love it when my kids want to spend time with me when our family does. But I think when I got this kind of way, it was probably around like 14 or 15 years of age. It was a really instrumental time for me. And I think it is for actually youth. There's this age of impact that we as fathers need to understand. And this is actually a study that between the age of 11 and 14 is where that's where we gain our most character of who we're going to be. Like, are we going to have work ethic? Are we going to be integrous? Are we going to be moral? You know, are we gonna drink? Are we gonna smoke? What kind of decisions are we gonna make that age between 11 to 14, guys, you have to pay attention to. And it is critical.com so I even think back in my day, I had a couple of really big experiences when I was 14, 15 years old of making either right or wrong decisions. And if I would have made one decision different, I would not be sitting here with you today, you know, but because I really wanted to be somebody. I remember sitting in my dad's truck in the ranch. We had a ranch and he taught us how to work hard. And I was pissed off. I was pissed off at him. I was pissed off that I had to do anything. I was like, dude, I don't want to be here. And I remember just like being like, what am I gonna be? I'm sitting here in the dually white Dodge truck. I can still see the brown, you know, vinyl seats. And I'm in the front seat listening to Travis Tritt. And it's a song. I'm gonna be somebody someday. And I remember like, God spoke to my heart and it just literally said like, Randy, you're gonna do great things. And I think from that moment, and it's like, you never know how one little conversation or one little song is gonna change things forever. But I remember that imprint on my heart is that I told myself, I'm gonna be somebody someday. I'm going to make a huge impact on this world. I'm going to be a great person and a great human. At that time in my life, a lot of my friends were making really bad decisions and I had to make a decision whether I was going to go down the right path or the wrong path. And because of that day sitting there, I was mad because I was supposed to be with my friends doing bad things. And my dad knew it. I didn't know that he knew it. Whether it's the spirit or whatever, he knew it. And I went with him instead of going with them and they got in big trouble. And I would have been in that camp, but yet I was sitting there being mad and angels are watching over me or protecting me. And I'm sitting there in my dad's white dually Dodge truck having a conversation with Travis Tritt and God and myself saying like, I'm going to be a freaking awesome person one day. And I think that was a single moment that I can remember those little tiny moments, those little tiny memories. And it imprinted in my heart, in my mind, in my soul, that I'm not going to settle for anything but excellence.

That's awesome. A kind of follow up question to that. Thanks for sharing that. That was actually really cool. But a follow up question of that is it seems like you have endless energy. I don't know if you do or not, but I like look at myself and there's days when, many days when I'm coming home. I might get home at six, seven o' clock usually. And you know, I'm trying to put on my, my, like, I'm trying to like, get myself geared up. Like, you can't be Mr. Tired. I am. Do you, do you have any tricks of the trade or things that help you to have energy when you don't have energy or you've had a long day or because you seem to have like this power of I'm going to, I'm going to turn it on, you know, and maybe that's not always the case. I'm sure you have moments where you just are done. But talk to me about your energy levels and how you keep them up.

You know, And I, and I actually, I learned, I learned a lot of this from, from being around Tony Robbins, being around other people. This is like, how much. How do you be high performance? How do you maximize your day and your life? How do you squeeze every drop out of it without getting exhausted?

Tell me about that.

So for me, it's actually, here's some of the tricks. I go to bed at the same time every night. So I journal at night and I plan my whole entire day. I know exactly what I'm doing. And then I go to bed at around. I get in bed around 10:15, I'm asleep by 10:30, 10:45, and then I wake up at the same time every day at about 5:30, 5, 15. I don't even need an alarm clock anymore. And I even try to stay on that schedule. But, but I found that having that really, really good sleep, I do have an OURA ring. You know, I've got. I mean, I invested in an amazing bed. Best pillows ever. Like that. We spent so much time in bed, you might as well maximize those effort. I wasn't always that way. And I actually was. I gained weight, I lost energy, I had lack of clarity and focus. For me, guys like, sleep is everything when it comes to high performance. It's one of the things. And so I would suggest that you invest in a good bed, good pillow, really get your sleep rhythm down. You know, Dr. Bruce, a really good book is the Sleep Doctor if you want to. Want to get some heat. He taught me a whole bunch of things about six years ago that actually increased my productivity, my energy, my drive, my clarity, my thinking, you know, everything. It comes down to that one Thing and it was really important. I think the other thing is when you do, when I do get tired, I don't. You can't drink energy drinks. Like the best. You know what's better than an energy drink is like literally in my office, I have push up bars and I do air squats and I do sit ups. Or I'll go take a walk around the building. That will give you more energy. Just take a quick break, go get some vitamin D, go get outside, go get some fresh air. That has made the difference too. I'll make sure to take a deep breath and set my. Make sure that I get back in a beautiful state. I'm not always like this. It's like you do have hard days, you have hard things, you have freaking things that weigh on your head that like a crater in your brain is like, dude, how am I going to solve this problem if you sit there and try to stew in it? You got to take yourself to another state. You got to get in a beautiful state. So I will go take a 10 minute walk, do some air squats, some push ups, some sit ups, like literally in my suit or whatever and just get that energy back and get myself back in a beautiful state. Because it's not the size of the problem, it's the size of the person that matters. And if you're in a grumpy state, if you're in a negative state, you're not going to make positive right decisions.

Yeah, I said this about a thousand times on the podcast, but I tell my kids all the time that happiness is a choice. In some ways, energy is a choice too. And I like the idea of like wake yourself up a little bit, right? Get what you call it, a beautiful place.

Yeah, beautiful state.

A beautiful state. Sometimes you just have to wake yourself up, like get out of your own way, take a walk, whatever it takes for you to. Sometimes I'll find myself during the day. Like I'm kind of. Lots coming at me. I'm weighing myself down. I'll go, no, this is a choice. I'm not going to be that guy. I'm going to be this guy. Right? And I see you just always kind of in this place of a beautiful state, as I'll call it now that you said that. So that's cool. That's awesome. I think there's also times and seasons, right? There are moments I don't want everyone to feel like. Even when bad stuff happens, you should be the happiest person alive. I do think that you can be happier even when Bad stuff happens out of a choice. Right? But there is appropriate times to be sad and appropriate times to be stressed and appropriate times. Right. But in all those times, you can heighten who you are and be the best version of yourself, right?

Well, and actually, in those times of struggle, in those times of hardship is where I've actually really found out who I really am. You know, it's the struggle and challenges that will introduce a man to himself. So you have to understand that and just know that it's part of the growth process and enjoy it. Freaking give it your all. Don't I actually try not to. I used to be like, bring it on. Freaking, let's go. I mean, one of my favorite. One of my favorite mentors that I love, he used to always say he's like 80 plus years old. And I loved it when he said, you know, I pray that God will give me mountains to climb. I think about that all the time. It's like, dude, what mountain am I supposed to climb right now? Like. But I like, look, I want to do hard things. I want hard challenges, I want hard problems, because guess what? It makes me a better freaking person. I don't want to sit and watch Maury Povich. I don't even watch tv, guys. I mean, I don't. I'm like, dude, what is. What are the greatest things that I can do to make the greatest impact on this earth with the friends that I surround myself with? Because there's, like, 7 billion people on this planet. How blessed are we that we actually get to be here talking about fatherhood and greatness, like, this is rare, dude. So I. I just. I just look at. I look at trials and hardship differently now in my life. I've been in some really prominent leadership roles that have helped me to also see people in a different light. And so I think for me, looking at challenges and problems and I don't look at myself, oh, woe was me, I'd never do that anymore. I'm like, dude, it's going to make me a better person. Let's go.

I hope our kids are listening to this, because this is like, gifts of what life's all about right now from Randy Garn. You want hard things, that's when you're going to grow. You think you don't, but you actually do want hard things. And 90% of the time, our reaction to those hard things is not an outside influence in any way. It's right in here. It's our own minds that get in the way.

Yeah.

Nobody. It's people. I grew up in different cultures. I think that's something I tell my kids too is like you're growing up in a certain culture that your parents have, that the people you surround yourself with, the friends you have. But that culture doesn't have to define who you are. You can totally change who you are. You can decide to be a happy person, not an unhappy person. You to decide that you're going to attack life or let it attack, let it affect you. Right. I had a, I had a mentor once who said, work the issues before they work you. Yeah, that's the, that's a different mental attitude. Right. Like your friend said, give me a mountain to climb because I know I'm going to grow. But when you're 11 to 14, those ages you talked about, that's not how you're typically thinking. Like you don't want the challenge you wanted. You want the easy button. But you realize over life teaches you that the easy button doesn't make you happy. It's actually the hard button that makes it make. Creates you as a greater person and creates happiness. Right?

Yeah. Yeah.

And I think all of us have like been down before, you know, or experienced some form of like anxiety or depression, like talking about your daughter's book. Right. And you are sitting here as the sum of many years of really working hard on this.

Yeah.

Right. You were probably born a little bit this way, air quotes, you know, but you've worked really hard to get to that point. Are there still times? And I know you just kind of alluded to there's times when you have to get back into that beautiful state. But in a moment of like vulnerability. Are there times when you're just like, like I can't, I can't. Like I've never seen Randy like that. So I'm going to give him the opportunity to admit that it might happen to him.

I mean. Oh yeah, it absolutely does. You know, it absolutely does. And I think, you know, there. And I can think of, you know, several times, I think I think of a time where one of my lowest times was when I was serving as a bishop of our ward. I had two sets of twins, we had four kids under the age of five years old. And my father in law had muscular dystrophy and dementia. And we moved him in with us at that same time. My wife's business was going through some crazy stuff and I literally, I can't even remember last time. We were like two ships crossing in the night. You know, I'm like, man, this isn't working. I'm like, God, where? I mean, this isn't supposed to be how it is, you know? And I remember coming home one, one night really late, and my wife's like, dude, we don't even see each other anymore. Like, what is going on? And I think from that day, I mean, really having her sit there and be like, I haven't seen you in months. Like, you're here, but you're not here. And I think for me, that was a such a huge wake up call. Like, dude, I gotta be the best father and the best husband that I possibly can for my kids. Like, if I look at my priorities, it definitely is God, my wife, my kids, and my business partners. And then everybody else falls in the rest of that. And I want to serve them, I want to do good. But, dude, I am going to ensure that I am doing a really good audit on my human strategy with those that matter most. So I think from that day, even though I was serving, is this, like, was I spending time for myself? Like, I think you also have to, you have to think about how you ensure you're utilizing your days and your times appropriately. Because I think you come down and Corey, you hit it. It's like, what decisions are we making? We make thousands of decisions every single day. And are those decisions the right decisions that are going to move you to where you want to go? And I'm looking now guys too. And to answer your question, Kirk, yes, I have hard days, but I look at those hard days differently now. And I don't let them get to me in such a way that it, like, stops me from being the person I want to be. But I have been through those. And now I've trained myself to ensure that I get into a quick state. And you can change yourself just like that. Like, I love Mel Robbins. It's a five second rule. It's like you can change yourself just like that. And I've trained myself to do that. But I do go in dark places every once in a while. But what helps me the most is I literally have to. I have to go outside every single day. So that helps me a ton. And then I also have, like, my best friends are such great people and humans. I ever need anything, they're there for me. So I think surrounding yourself with the best of the best people will also help in those. In those aspects.

So I can't remember what book I was reading, but something. I remember reading this book and it was like, 33% of your time should be spent with people. Who are mentors who like, you want to become like them, that are like, in your own mind, they're like greater than I'm aspiring to be like these people. And then 33% with your peers and 33% with people who you're helping. Right?

Yeah.

And so, and so I've been thinking about that recently in business and in life.

Right.

Like you're doing an audit. Who am I spending my time with? So who are some of those people that have been your mentors or that you've aspired to be like and why and what have you learned from them? Would be an interesting conversation. Because I know you. You know so many people, it's probably hard to limit your mentors. I don't want to offend anyone. Now you just gave me a list of 100 people, but maybe some that stick out in your mind and, and what they've taught you and how they've affected your life.

Yeah, I mean, I've got, I've got so many, so many awesome, amazing mentors right now. I mean, I can think of a really. My business partner, Ethan Willis. You know, he is right now, I mean, he's in Arizona, but we talk almost every single day or connect every single day. And he's just a great example. He's an amazing business leader, an amazing man. You know, I've got to know. I mean, another amazing man, Dean Graciosi is such a powerhouse and he's just, I mean, he does so much for so many people and nobody really realizes, but he does, you know, he does a lot of great programs. They just launched a huge program with Matthew McConaughey and. But yet I know him on a personal level. He's just an amazing, great human. And I know that like we go through stuff and like, it is, it's, it's super fun to see him. You know, I have so many good mentors and friends that are my, that are my best friends that I get to work with every single day. You know, Brendan Burchard is amazing. I mean, it just, there's. I've been blessed that way. I think the richness of my life is my friends. Like you guys are gonna have another amazing man on that. You'll, you know, Steven Scoggins is out here with me from North Carolina. Like, he has been such an amazing example of a God fearing person. I mean, he's homeless and then yet creates this huge business and this wants to just impact and serve people's life and change things. So he's just become a great friend And a mentor to me and is such an example in so many ways. And so there's. There's some great, just people that you surround yourself with and people that you wouldn't know. Other mentors of mine, my scout master, Dave Woodbury, he's not here anymore, but, dude, he was like, my dad was amazing, but I also had another person because it's hard sometimes as fathers to be a prophet in your own land. So there are times me and my dad hated each other, but he. I loved him, though. I respected him and. But Dave was the one. Like, he was out there taking us camping and teaching us the wilderness and shooting and hunting and all of that stuff. So there's been amazing, amazing mentors in my life. Both. There's mentors that are there for you financially, you know, business leaders. There's mentors there. They've been in my life physically, like, people. Like, I'm doing a. I did a half. Half Ironman a couple years ago. I'm doing two triathlons this year. I have mentors that are there for me spiritually. I have mentors that are there for me as a husband and a father. And you two are some of them. I mean, look what we're doing. I know all of us are passionate about being the best dads we possibly can be, and that's part of the gentleman's project. So I think my mentors are some unknown, some known, but people that I love like and respect and that I want to be like.

And I think our kids can learn from this conversation because it doesn't matter whether you're 10 or 75, who you surround yourself makes up a lot of who you are and who you spend time with influences who you are. And it's hard when you're talking to your 10 year old about, I don't know if that's the greatest friend. I think this friend would be better for you, but. But it's not. And then I think sometimes we forget that in our. Or I have. In my life, I forget, oh, man, who am I surrounding myself right now? I'm on this busy treadmill of just getting things done, and I have amazing mentors at work, no doubt. But who else am I spending my time with? The podcast has been good for me for that. Right. In fact, you've introduced some amazing people. I'm like, oh, man, that person's gonna make me a better person. I love that. And so I hope that our kids strive for that. Strive for someone and look for people in your lives, adults and other Kids who help you grow to be the person to be more like who you want to be, to be more like how you envision your life, you know?

Yeah, dude. I mean, 100%. And I. What I would do is one of the things that I did. I had a really good mentor of mine, business mentor, said, who are the 25 people that you want to get to know? I wrote those down. He said, I'm going to challenge you, and we're going to get to. Because I will work with a few people at a time, because I get people all the time. Randy, I want you to be on my board. Advisors want you to mentor me. I want you to be up like that, but all of the time, which I love. But I can only do so much. But I want to. When I do, I want to pour my heart and soul into them. But for me, I've actually never paid for mentoring or coaching. I've only invested in it because I actually use it. And I have mentors and I have coaches, and I invest in that. But the best thing that one of them told me was, like, go make a list of the 25 people that you want to get to know. I did that. And for six months, I served them. I found out what they needed. I, like, did the old Harvey McKay, 66. What charity do they go to? What school do they go to? How many kids do they have? Who's their favorite football team? So I'm sending out, like, a signed Rudy jersey to one of them, or I'm sending out Yankees baseball to one of them, or I'm sending tickets that I'm getting to know them. And I just took six months of my life after I sold our company to get to know the 25 people that I really wanted to be like. What was amazing was I found out and I got to know all of them, and I just checked them off, every one. And I found out that about 14 of them were amazing. And about the other, there were six. You know, the rest of that. That whatever amount that other is. 11, 11 of them, 10 or 11 of them weren't even real. It was all a facade. And I get to know them by, you know. You know, when you take a person out golfing, I mean, like, people have patterns, right? And I same thing. When I take him out fishing or when I do stuff, I'm like, all right, that guy isn't really who he says he is. And I think that's why I do love to bring people to my home. I do love them to meet my family. And to meet my wife, because I am an open book and that I want them to experience what gives me the greatest joy. So as I did that and I went through that list, not all of them were real, but some of them, I would say about 10 of them, I'm still doing a ton of stuff with and making an impact. So I think be intentional about who you. Who are your mentors? Ensure that you find out, are they real? Can they make an impact and never be, Never look for mentorship for somebody that doesn't have a life that you want to live.

Yeah, and I like to shoot for the stars, too. I think people like you didn't do that, it sounds like, but some people, like, well, it just needs to be someone, you know, close or someone attainable.

Someone easy to get to.

You might not get to, you know, the Michael Jordan, whoever the big person is that you want to get to, whoever it is. Right. But you should still shoot for that. That's why I told my kids, like, that's gonna hurt anything to try to have Tony Robbins or whoever the person that you think is the coolest out there go for that.

Right, dude, 100%. Like, sometimes we, We. How do I say this? Sometimes we look at everybody else as so amazing, and then we. We don't look at ourselves as that amazing human. And that. I don't know what it is, but I, I don't care whether it's the king or the President of the United States or whoever it is. I look at them just the same as I look at all of us in here. And I think one of my skill sets is to see everyone as a son or daughter of God. And I see the uniqueness in everybody. And I treat the Uber driver and the CEO the same. And I think you can find greatness in everybody. But when you're choosing your mentors, I've learned that two things. You have to have a desire to learn and the actually ability to learn and grow. There's a lot of people that have a desire to learn and to be mentored, but they don't make the changes. So if you are going to get mentorship, if you're going to do that, you literally have to invest in it and do it. You have to do it yourself. You have to put in the work. But I think, I think also, like, you asked me, like, what brings me the greatest joy. I think some of that is it is that I literally, I don't judge anybody anymore. We're all going. Everybody's going through crazy stuff, whether who, whatever you title you have, we are all the same. We all put our pants on the same. And I love to look at everybody as just amazing humans. And, like, they're created by our. Our maker. And, like, let's just help each other out and be as kind as we can and push each other to greatness.

Great words of advice. I still want to ask Randy one question about his dad.

Go for it.

Can I do that? It's all good stuff, Randy. Thank you. As you are in that stage with your dad right now in life where you realize that the time that you have with him is finite, looking back at the times that you were able to spend with him in the past, what are some. What is the one most impactful moment you ever had with your dad?

Oh, man. Oh, dude.

You think. You take a minute to think about it.

No, I know what I absolutely know. And there's been a bunch of them. But as you said, that one came to my mind specifically. It's like growing up in Idaho, we'd always go deer hunting. We'd always go get our deer. We get deer jerky. And I mean, we ate the venison and I mean, we were enjoying the fruits of what God has created in an appropriate way. I remember I actually had my mission call. I was going to go to the Philippines for two years. And I remember we were getting ready to head out, and he said, we're going to go on one last hunt. You know, I was going in December and this was October, and we went up to our favorite hunting place where we've got tons of deer. Before. I remember just spending time with my dad on the drive and talking to him about what kind of person I want to be, my relationship with God, what kind of person I want to marry. He was literally just asking me questions like, what are you going to become, Randy? And we got up to the hill, we went up to our favorite place, hiked up these mountains. I get just grueling, dude. It was like they're steep, rugged mountains in Salmon, Idaho. And it's a. It's rowdy. Not like it's. It's like we're talking like Butch Cassidy and Sundance Kid Rowdiness and. And Lewis and Clark that they said this is their favorite place. But me and my dad were sitting there, we're sneaking up on these deer. We know they're there. And he and I, we get these two. We have two one 5.16 point buck right in our sights. Literally, our guns are up, they're pointed. My dad's probably about, I don't know, 15 yards from me. These two bucks are just sitting there. It's just like God put them right there for us. Like, he can't make it up. It was a misty morning. I still remember, like, as yesterday. And me and my dad, like, literally both looked over at each other, and we put our guns down and we just watched him. And I don't know what it was like, it wasn't natural, but it was just like that day, he and I had such a spiritual moment, just not just existing and watching these beautiful animals. And then he and I talk. We still talk about that day, that for some reason, something came over us that, you know, we didn't take the shot. And we just sat there, enjoyed quietness and stillness and the beauty of the earth, and we walked down. And that. That hunting trip with my dad, the talk we had, you know, I won't get into some of the. Some of the stuff, but just those are the little things we need to do with our kids, you know, Those are. The Little things don't mean a lot. Little things mean everything when you're building deep, meaningful relationships with your children. And that he took the time to do that, and it was just he and I. I didn't have my little crazy brother with us and my older brother with me. It was just me and my dad for one last hunting trip.

That's a good story. We amazingly ran out of time.

Amazingly, yeah.

Because it feels like five minutes went.

By for hours with Randy.

Thanks for sharing that, Randy. That's cool. Those are the moments you pray for as a. As a parent, too. Like, you just hope and pray that you have those kind of moments with your kids, because those are the moments, like you said, that mean everything.

Well, we've immortalized it in audio format.

That's right. I actually don't think I've ever told that story. It's the first time.

Really told it well, for the first time.

That's why I wanted to ask that question. I think it's an amazing story. Well, Randy, thank you. Thanks for being an advocate for the podcast. Thanks for all you do. Thanks for your friendship. We really appreciate you and the spirit that you brought to the podcast today. So thanks, everybody. Man, that story has just kind of, like, got me. It's good.

Feeling it, huh?

I'm feeling it. Me and Randy connected right there because I've had similar experiences like that with my grandfather.

Do we want to hear a new version of what it means to Randy to be a gentleman, to finish the podcast. Randy, what does it mean to you to be a gentleman?

To me, being a gentleman to me is that you're completely aligned with what God created you to be and you understand what it means to be strong, you understand what it means to be faithful, you understand what it means to be moral, you understand what it means to have integrity. You understand to show others what it means to trust in God. And for me, being a gentleman is being a window to God's love and a strong force for good. That's what a gentleman means to me.

Thanks for being a gentleman, Randy.

I dropped that answer. Thanks for everyone for listening today and being part of this fantastic podcast.

Thanks, Randy.

Thank you like and share this one. There's a lot of people I think that can benefit from what Randy had to say today. So if you were prompted to share this with somebody, act on that thought. I'm Kirk Chuck.

I'm Corey Moore. Have a great day.