Episode 194: The New Face of Social Work

No need to whine, it's whiny palooza. Have some wine and join us on the whiny palooza podcast with Rebecca Green.

Welcome to the whiny palooza podcast. I'm your host, Rebecca Green. I'm a wife, mother of 3, and licensed clinical social worker. I also have 3 fur babies at home too. My passion has always been to help children and their families. I always dreamed of being a wife and a mother. Parents are always learning through their struggles, failures, and successes and joys. I am no stranger to this wild ride of parenting, and I know behind every great parent lies a team of supportive friends and family. I want to be part of your support system. I want you to know that you are not alone. We are in this parenting world together. Join me every week for insightful discussions with experts on parenting and marriage, as well as other parents who have found the secret to successes in parenthood. You'll learn tips and tricks to make life with your family better than ever. I hope you will follow along with me while we dive into what it takes to achieve a happy family.

Hello everyone, this is Rebecca Green for the Whiny Palooza podcast, and I am so excited because I have Paige Conti here with us today. Paige is a college student, and she's here doing an assignment for her paper. So Paige, can you tell us what your assignment is?

So our assignment for English 100 class is my dream job interview, and I just have to take something that I would want to pursue when I'm older and basically ask someone that's like a professional.

Oh, that's awesome. This is going to be fun. Okay, so I'm going to let Paige jump into her questions.

Alrighty, so the first thing that, um, I would want to know is what, like, what is your actual job title?

Okay, so I'm a social worker. Okay. And, um, do you want to know like what I did pre-kids and post-kids? Because you can do so many different things with social work.

Okay, so like what do you do now?

Like, okay, currently, so this moment Um, so I write a blog and I post it every Wednesday, and it's a different social work topic, um, every single week. So this week was social stress, you know, and I'll do anxiety, depression, marriage. So every week I pick a topic, and someone either asks me to do the topic or I come up with the topic based on my own experience. And then I take the blog And later that night I go live and I do a vlog and I talk about the topic. And then I also, um, I have books based on the blog. So I've published one, I'm about to publish a second one. And then I also started a podcast a couple years ago and I interview professionals, so marriage and family experts. So that's what I'm doing currently, and I love it, and it lets me work here around my children.

Yeah, that's fun. That's fun. That's good. All right, so what I'm gonna touch upon, like, college. So, like, what did you major in in college at first?

Okay, so as I went to UB for 6 years, okay, so the first 4 years was, um, a psychology major, and then I wanted to become a psychologist, and I met with my counselor and she and she said, well, it sounds like a lot of what you want to do is social work. And she explained social work to me, which was exactly what I wanted to do, very similar but different to being a psychologist. Um, so she recommended the program at UB. So I went and got my master's from UB in social work. So I was there for 6 years.

Okay. That's wow. All right. So after you did like your years at college, what was your next step afterwards?

So my girlfriend told me about Catholic Charities. She was working for a program, Multi-Systemic Therapy, and, um, what we did was we went into the home and we did therapy for families who were struggling with their kids' behavior, and their kids were in a lot of trouble at school, probation, um, multiple places. So she told me about this job, so I went and interviewed, and I loved them, they loved me, so I started right— that was my next step, like right out of college.

Oh, okay, so you did like that right afterwards?

Yeah, like I graduated, um, like my graduate degree says like June 1st, 2000, and I think I started working like right then, like the same day.

How many years did you do that?

Well, I did therapy I did therapy therapy like in the homes for like, was it 4 or 5 years? And then they moved me to supervising the therapist. And then I did that for a few more years and I loved it. And I loved like helping the therapist do therapy. I actually liked that better. And then I had Max and then I cried to Seth that I didn't wanna go back to work. And within my, like, what was it like 6 weeks maternity, he finally came around, but he was financially stressed. Was like, we can't afford this. And I was like, we— like, I need to stay home with this baby.

Yeah.

So, um, it was hard because I loved my job, but you know me, I wanted to have babies and be home.

All right, another thing is, um, what year did you graduate college?

2000. Well, no, so 2000 minus 4— wait, no, 2000 minus 2, so 1998. Was the college degree, and then— I'm sorry about the dog— and then 2000— Tanner, let us do this interview— and then 2000 was, um, the master's. Okay, if I can do math. So 1998. Yeah, long, long, long time ago.

No, that's not that long ago. Oh my— have you ever traveled for work?

Yes, I did. So, um, the thing about Multisystemic Therapy is it's research-based and the hub is in Charleston. So Charleston, South Carolina, that's like the hub of it. That's where it started. So they sent us there, like we would go there for trainings. Um, did we go to Savannah? Like they would like send us to trainings. So I like traveled for like training purposes. I mean, the amount of trainings that I did in that period was a lot.

Oh wow. Yeah, that does sound like a lot. It must have been fun though.

It was fun.

It was lots of fun, and I wasn't, you know, I didn't have kids at home, which would have made it harder for me. My dog is in between us right now, so this is fun. This is fun, Tanner.

Um, how long do you consider yourself being a social worker?

Well, it's been 22 years.

Okay, 22 years it's been because it was like, well, like officially working, like, like you consider yourself like you could go out and find yourself a job like that, like that point when you're considered an expert on it.

Like, wait, okay, say that again.

Like if you become like, like a pro, you have a degree, like how long have you since you've had your full social working degree, if that— I said that.

Okay, so I got my degree from social work 22 years ago, and then I took a test to get my license. So I'm a licensed clinical social worker. Then 6 years after you work, you apply for an R, and that R lets you do private practice. So now when I want to do private practice, which I do, um, I can bill insurance. And the R lets me bill insurance. So I have the LCSW-R. Got the LCSW 22 years ago, got the R— can't do math— 22 minus 6, so really 22 years. Yeah, I can't do any math in my head. I'm a social worker.

That's okay. Um, a little bit going back, what high school did you attend?

I went to Williamsville East. Do you know that?

No, I did not know.

I didn't know if you knew that.

No, I didn't. You said you went to UV and I was like, then she must be around here. But I did not know you went to East.

I did. I went to, I went to all the, like, I've been here in this area for all 46 years of my life.

That's crazy.

It's absolutely crazy.

But you're used to it now. It's all good.

I mean, other than the cold, it's all good. Yeah.

All right. So coming back to like time now. Like, describe your, like, normal day at work, like, right now.

Right now? Okay, so it looks different every day, so that's the problem. So, like, Tuesday was, like, insane. So Tuesday I did 3— I recorded 3 podcasts and wrote my blog, so it was, like, intense. It was like— it wasn't like 9 to 5, like, it was like 9 to 9. Oh, but, but it's not normally like that. It's normally like, okay, so what we're doing right now at— so like, I'm gonna go get Max when we're done. Um, so like a 1 o'clock podcast is like a normal thing in my life where I'll squeeze in a recording of a podcast, I'll squeeze in like, when is my blog due? Because I have to, I have to work on that. It takes me hours to work on that because I do research too. Um, I am finishing my book, so I have work on that to do. So like, if I put everything else aside today, like I did stuff around the house— this is the problem with working at home, like you have to focus on work. So if I just did work today, I would have, um, an example would be working a couple hours on my book and working like an hour on the podcast. So like a few hours a day.

Okay.

So I'm not like— I'm like, I want part-time.

Yeah.

And my goal, my next goal— so, um, Seth and I are working on a summit. Do you know what a summit is?

Uh, sort of.

It's like, um, it's like a conference. Okay. And I'm gonna bring— so I've had like tons of guests in 2 years on my podcast, so we have reached out to all of them and said, who wants to be on Rebecca's first summit. So now we have, I think, like 26 people responded that they want to be on in it. Well, I can't fit 26, but I'll do it again. And so we're going to work on coordinating who's like, what days are we going to do this, who's going to speak when, and that's going to be like another thing that I'm going to have to work on. So it's like new things come up, I'm always evolving, and then at some point I'll add in, I want to like see clients. But only like a couple. Like, I don't want— like, people— therapists are like the most needed right now. I don't know if you know that, but if you're thinking about it, I mean, we'll talk. But like, my friends are like full, and, and people are like, are you taking clients? It's just so needed.

Yeah, it's, it's sad that they do, but it's— I'm glad that they're there.

But at the same time, like, doesn't everybody need therapy? Like, don't we all?

Someone just just need someone to talk to sometimes.

Yeah.

And like, even like, and some people don't know what to say. That's the issue. Like, there's been times where people have talked to me about their problems and I don't know how to execute it to them that it like, without saying it's going to be okay, because no one wants to hear that. Everyone wants to hear like some story that you went through to make sure that like, oh, they got through it. I can get through it. Like something to like lift them up.

But yes, you'd be a good therapist for sure, 100%.

I just like, I don't know, I've been told that I've been good at listening.

So yes, do your friends come to you with your pro— their problems? Yeah, like I always felt that way, like they wanted to talk to me. I wanted to, I wanted to help everybody.

There's sometimes where my friends like don't come up to me because they're— I'm very— it's not that I'm honest, I'm just very sometimes truthful. And sometimes if you don't have that person you'll never be in shape sometimes. And sometimes I need that, but they'll be scared to talk to me sometimes because they'll know stuff will come out of my mouth that's true. Like, it's not like just some, eh, whatever, it'll be fine. It's like, I'll sit down and have a conversation with you for like 2 hours about it.

That's awesome. That is awesome. That's a talent that not everybody has.

Really?

It's not— does not come natural to people. Like, um, Seth said a lot of people came to him with their problems and he would want to help them, but like Some people aren't even interested in hearing it. Like, they don't want to.

Some people, like, I'm a very emotional person, and when I hear someone else going through something, like, it, like, hurts me almost. And I'm like, oh.

And I will tell you that when I started, like, they don't really, they don't really teach you enough to leave it at work. Okay. Um, when I started, I would go home crying.

Yeah.

And like, I toughened up, but like, you have to, like, you have to leave it. Like you'll be a mess because some people have such severe problems going on.

Yeah.

So you have to like, if you do this, you have to take care of yourself. Yeah. So it doesn't eat you up.

Yeah. Because actually I went on a missionary trip to Cincinnati, Ohio.

I forgot about that.

I went to Ohio with Owen.

Yes.

And we went, there was a group of 14 of us and we're all high schoolers and we went to like probably one of the worst parts in Cincinnati, and we worked in this like, it was like a food market thing, but like they could just come by with tickets and they would have to like sign up for, and they would come down with tickets and get like the little like market type of food, and we would give it to them. And I've had people come up to me and like, there's this homeless guy that was blind, and like he was telling me this whole story and like all this stuff, and like I like had to keep it together while I was standing there, and I was like Okay, Paige, it's fine. Like, this happens in life, but they'll, they'll get through it. Like, that's what I have to keep telling myself. Yeah, it's so bad, but it'll work. They made it that far.

That is, that is amazing that you and Owen did that. I forgot about that. Your mother posted pictures, well, like, of you leaving. Yeah. Um, that is amazing. You have some really good experiences, and you're— I feel like your church work Yeah, that ties into this.

Yeah, because we have some people at our work that are actually like therapists, like they are trained to be therapists that work in the church.

Yes.

So there's like, they're giving them not just like what a normal like therapist would from like a doctor or pediatrician or whatever, um, they're actually giving them like, like God advice, but like at the same time with their therapy training that they're like certified in. So like it's like helping them, but Because I know a few people that do go to that, but then they also go to like their pediatrician therapist or wherever they're seeing a therapist.

Yeah, so, but yeah, you could have more than one. You just have to find one that works for you.

Yeah, and sometimes people like, they go through a million of them and they can't— like, I have a bunch of friends that have all these stories about different kinds of therapists and they never can find the right one. And then like, I remember one time I was like praying for this one girl at my church, so I was trying to find one and she finally found a girl and I was like Thank God.

Oh, that was so nice of you to pray for her. Oh my goodness. See, now those kind of stories makes me want to be like jumping right in. Yeah, people can't find— and I'm not going to be the right person for everybody either, you know.

Yeah, it makes sense. And I mean, like, that's with anything.

So yes, yes, I agree.

Another thing is, um, this is like very off topic, but like the role— like, what is the role of writing in your field? I know you do like, like writing on there and like make like vlogs or whatever they— blogs. There we go. I know you do that.

Yeah.

But is that just it or is it there more?

Um, like for me or for the field? Because for you. Okay, so for me, um, so my, like, my books are like the ultimate goal.

Okay.

So like I want, like, I have all these book ideas. So like writing is really be good for me. And I started writing because I had 3 little kids and was like so stressed out. I mean, now, you know, they're 15, 13, and 10. I mean, like, it's harder in some ways, but it's so much easier, like, physically.

Yeah, because you don't have to— like, they're a little bit more independent.

Yes, dependent. Yes.

But when I—

when they were tiny, like, I was stressed out and I turned to writing, and it was one of my, like, biggest coping skills, and it still is. So like now when I'm stressed about something, I'm like, okay, if this is something that I'm stressed about, then other people are stressed too. So I'm going to write about it. I'm going to write about my stress. I'm going to write about how I'm getting through it. What skills— like, I don't think of myself as like the average parent because I have so much parent training. So like, how am I using that training in my own parenting or in my own marriage so that I can help people? So like, I have all these book ideas. So for me, it's writing the blog and it's writing the books. That's like the writing for me. Okay. And social media is writing.

Yeah.

Like, I, I feel like we're in a world of social media.

Yeah, everything.

And like, I try to post every day. Like, you probably— I don't— I think you follow me on— do you follow me on Facebook or Instagram?

Um, I think I follow you on Facebook.

Okay, so I have Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

I've seen you.

Is that it? Are there others that I'm forgetting? What else are people doing? That's it.

It's like Facebook. Yeah, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and like Snapchat. But no one's really—

and I don't do— yeah, I don't do Snapchat. I don't even know anything about Snapchat. We have to talk about Snapchat when we stop recording because I have a question. Okay, I gotta use Paige. So, um, Social media, I am purposely writing every day in a goal to just like put out good stuff to the universe and hopefully help somebody.

Yeah, right. Yeah, because that's how things are shared.

Oh my God, I shared a TikTok. Did you see my TikTok about boundaries?

I might— was it recent?

Uh-huh.

I haven't been on TikTok.

Okay, so I just— I'm realizing I have to do more like, like topics like that. Like, um, you know, like I'll go on TikTok for fun, but I think people really want like like some advice.

Yeah.

So I gotta start using it more for that because people really liked that one.

Yeah.

So, so that's like my next goal.

Yeah.

So social media takes up a lot of my time.

No, and it's okay because honestly, like, if it gets like somewhere, like, it'll grow and then people share and then it's not just you, it's like people sharing off of you to get somebody else. And like, I mean, it's common. I know a bunch of people that do it too. Like, even if it's just a simple clip or whatever.

Well, and like, like, therapy is great, but therapy— I mean, meeting with one person is fabulous, or meeting with a family is fabulous, but I'm trying to meet with like thousands of people online. So like, I'm trying to reach more.

Yeah.

Does that make sense?

No, it makes sense. That's what I mean. Social media is like that. So I know.

And then I have a Whiny Blues a Mom group on Facebook, which I probably didn't invite you to.

No, no, I don't. I don't have kids.

It's like all like it's all like parenting and marriage stuff. But, um, you know, that's free, and I try to like post stuff and topics in there and talk to people. So I've got that going too.

Yeah, that's good too, because people will read off that because people are going through stuff now. So like if they see that and they're like, oh, maybe I should do that, or, oh, that's good, that's good advice.

Yes. And like we talked about an average day, and I didn't tell you that like social media is like I don't know, how much does social media take up to do all that? So to post in like 4 places or 5 places, it takes me a good chunk of time every day.

Especially if you're like, if you like, I know on TikTok I messed up so many times on a TikTok and then I'm like, oh, gotta delete that, gotta redo it.

You know, this family that I follow, the dad said it took him like 36 hours to edit his video that he just put out. And I was like, What am I doing wrong? It's not taking me 36 hours.

Well, yeah, I think it's because like I know on like YouTube when people post that like they'll like go through the entire thing and take out snippets. Like you just have a podcast and you'll probably post this whole entire thing unless something's said, then you'll go back and like delete it. But normally they go through and like only do like bits and pieces of the actual video. They'll record for like hours but only take like 7 minutes of it.

So he recorded for 36 hours. And the video is like 16 minutes, so he took 36 hours and made it 16 minutes.

It's a waste of your day. Oh my God, I couldn't imagine recording for that long and only taking 6 minutes. Like, that's like living 6 minutes. 16, 16 minutes.

He didn't record the whole 36 hours. He didn't actually say how much of the 36 hours he recorded, but he shrunk it down to 16 minutes. Um, I don't edit. Like, I send this, I send this to an editor. So editing, I should tell you that editing is not my expertise. I don't know how to edit. My kids have not taught me. They know how. I literally will send this to my editor and say, can you edit this and put this out for me?

You know, that's fine. I mean, honestly, like, I know how that feels because I don't really know how to edit really anything. I know how to like do little bits of things But my brother, whoo, just give it to him. He'll figure it out.

I'm sure you know more than I do.

I also grew up with it though.

Very true.

Like I was like, this was in my hand since like 7th grade.

You know that when Seth and I started dating, I don't think we had cell phones.

You had to use the wall?

Did we have a— or maybe I had a flip phone.

Oh, that could have been it.

I might have had a flip phone.

My mom had a flip phone when I was a kid, like young. And then all of a sudden, like, I Pretty sure the first like anything iPhone type of really came out like maybe the year I was born or maybe the year after.

Yeah. Yeah.

And my mom just didn't get it until like it became booming or whatever. But yeah, now that's all we do. Yeah.

Sadly.

Sadly. But I will say it has helped a little bit though.

I mean, oh yeah. I wish I had it when I had babies. It would have like helped me through. I would have been like seeing other parents going through it.

Yeah. And like if you need it, if you needed to learn something while you're or something, you just look it up.

Yes.

Because like half the stuff, like, I mean, when I get sick, I'm one of those people that are curious and I'm like, I have this and this and this and this. And then it tells me all the things I can have. And I'm like, I'm like, oh boy, I better not have that one.

Oh my God, don't let that stress you out. Oh my God. Yeah, that's that. We've been advised not to do that, but we all do. We all do.

Hey, I will say I've learned it from my mom.

Does she do it too?

And then she'll worry about it.

Oh, I love your mom. I miss your mom.

I love my mom too.

I need to see the whole family. Yeah, it's crazy. Owen's doing soccer, Max is doing football, and their soccer's done now. Soccer's done. Okay.

So that's, that's that. My dad's going to Chicago for work. No idea what he does.

Fun.

Something with work.

Yep.

So my mom's like, okay, we gotta do this and this and then ask me for rides. Throwing everywhere. I gotta pick him up from everywhere, drive him there, drive him there. Like, okay, fine.

You're so helpful. Yeah, I'm looking forward to Max getting his license to help me.

When does Max turn 16? Or is she—

January 24th.

Okay, so Owen and him are only 5 days apart. Yeah, so they're— yeah, they're gonna get them right. They're gonna—

they're gonna get ready to roll.

I know. I've been doing— oh, another helpful way I've been looking up cars on Facebook Market, seeing what Owen could get because Owen wants a pickup. It has to be a pickup. Like, these boys, these boys, I'm like, what are you, a country man? What do we have, a farm in the background?

I think Max wants a Jeep, and I don't know that they're safe, so I need to look that up.

They're gas guzzlers.

Like a— like just a normal Jeep?

Like What kind?

Like, just like a Jeep Wrangler, just like—

Yeah, they are. They will. Yeah, they're, they're a little gas. I mean, anything like that's not like that, that's like a medium-sized car. Like, I drive a medium-sized car, and since gas prices have gone down, now I pay probably $50 for a tank. And that, from a college student—

Does your parents make you pay for that?

Even though I pick up my brother, drive him here and drive him there.

They need to give you some gas money. No, they'll say, they'll say we already gave her enough. Oh my God, your mother's gonna listen to this and go, Rebecca, be quiet. Probably. Take her advice. Oh my God.

Alrighty, um, back to it. What is your favorite book?

Oh my goodness. You know what, Seth and I were just talking about The Four Agreements. Have you read that book?

No, I have not.

Okay, you definitely want to read that book. Probably one of my all-time favorites.

Okay, I will look that up. And then what is your favorite character, even if it's in that book or in a different—

like a character from a book? Yeah, or a character from a book. Okay, so that book, like, that's very self-helpy, that book. Like, I like a lot of like self-help type books. As far as like a character? Who is my favorite character? Oh my goodness gracious. I love Kristin Hannah books. Have you ever read a Kristin Hannah book? I don't, I don't like, they're very sad. I don't like that she's so sad, but like, I'm just thinking about like The Nightingale. Um, if you look up The Nightingale, like she was just so brave and I just like, never could have done what she did. Um, I just love brave women. They inspire me.

Yeah, that's— they, they inspire me too. Um, another thing is, I just had to ask, yes, this myself. Do you ever, like, your first book that you put out, have you ever read the book and then been like, I should have put that in there, or I shouldn't have took— or shouldn't have said that, or I should have done this? Like, I— this is just— they didn't ask me to do this, but I was just wondering.

So, um, I used to be a perfectionist.

Okay.

I'd like call myself like a recovering, recovering perfectionist, semi-recovering people pleaser, but you know that I still people please. Um, I used to want every single blog or book or anything to be perfect, and it was too stressful. It was too much pressure. And my latest line is good enough. So like, that is a line that gets me through almost every day. So like, if I go write a blog, like if you leave and I go write a blog, I will, I will like cut myself off. See, it's nice because they're due, like they really need to be in Tuesday night, early Wednesday morning. So I have a due date every week, which helps. So yes, um, I can be a perfectionist. But I have learned that it's good enough even if it's not perfect. I will go back after things are published and fix typos that I found, so I do do that. Um, I will be really scared to put something out that's like too personal, and nothing's really too personal because the goal is to be personal to help people. I will put something out that's like super personal to me and like I'm like embarrassed and I hit submit and I'm like so nervous and then people love it and relate. And it's like the more I hesitate and I'm nervous, the better it is.

Yeah, I feel like, I feel like when you hold back on things sometimes, like you're not actually getting that raw— yes, like information that people actually want to hear. Yes, because they may be going through the same thing.

Well, so like social stress that I talked about last night um, I felt like I had to be a little surfacey because I can't reveal— I mean, I could have talked to my kids and gotten permission, but like, how much personal stuff from your kids can you reveal? Like, you want to protect—

I don't—

I mean, my privacy is one thing, my kids are another thing. Like, how much of my kids' privacy do I want to invade upon? Yeah, right. So I had to be careful last night like there were like personal stories that I wanted to bring in and I was like, well, you didn't ask permission, so you can't. Like, you have to like be surfacey right now. Yeah, so that kind of sucked.

Yeah, I feel like, like once like you hear these stories, especially if it's like about my family too, and I'll be like, well, I can just— no, I can't because I don't like have their permission to like say something about it. Yeah, I mean, even though like people may know, but like I— they may not want anything, right? Which is okay, which is fine, because I wouldn't want something that I wouldn't want on there either.

But exactly, I ask permission all the time. Um, like, I'll be like, can I post this? Or they'll say, don't post this, don't post this, Mom. What else do you got?

Um, the last thing that I put at the end is like anything else about your career that someone that wanted to go in the path that you did, it's almost like some advice or like something that like you could take from it to help you through your path of becoming this?

When I started doing therapy, um, I was so nervous because who was I? To be helping these families. Yeah, like couples, kids, families, parents. Like, who was I? And I was like, they were like, you're going to this family and then you're going to this family. And they would just like send me out into the universe and I would be like, I'd go to my supervisor and I'd be like, I am so nervous. And one of my supervisors gave me silly advice that really worked. And she said, you have to learn to fake it till you make it. And I think that I had to like pretend to be a professional because I was so nervous. Like, you're nervous at first. So, okay, so you get your therapy degree, you get your first client, you're sitting in a room with your first client and you're so nervous and you're like, am I gonna help this person? Like, become the professional. Like, like, do the pretending and like get into your space and you're gonna find that you're not pretending. Like, you're gonna like get yourself into this role and you're gonna be like, I'm professional, I can do this, I'm gonna be a great actress. I learned a great acting— I learned great acting skills between therapy and parenting because you don't want your kids to know that you're like falling apart sometimes, you know what I mean?

Yeah.

Or you just don't want to be reactive, you want to be like calm with your kids. So it was the same with clients. Like, the goal is to be non-reactive. So I got into this, like, calm professional place, and I would, like, put myself into this person. And I realized, like, I wasn't pretending. Like, this is who I am. Like, I am a good therapist. I am helping them. But her telling me to go pretend— I know that sounds really stupid, but it got me through the beginning of therapy.

Yeah, because it, like, made you into being confident with it.

Yes, like you're not confident, you're pretending to be confident, and then you realize you are confident because you do—

like, you got a degree in it. Like, you know what you're doing. It's not like you're just some Joe Schmo walking in trying to help somebody.

Yes, and I also learned that if you're like a new therapist, you're going to have so much drive and ambition and motivation to help someone. And somebody who's been doing it for 30 years may have the experience, but maybe they're burned out and not as good as you, you know. So being new is like, I know it's scary, but just think about like the enthusiasm, the motivation, the desire to help. Like, all of that means so much.

Yeah, I think that would really like boost someone, like being like you're helping people. Yeah, it's not just like for you, like it's for them too.

Yes.

And I think that's like the main purpose of like that kind of path.

Agree, agree. I think you'd be great. So you're considering this?

I am considering this.

So social work?

Yeah, so I like, I've always kind of knew stuff that happened, um, with some things in my family kind of led me to this thing with just like wanting to become into this kind of profession, and I don't know, I kind of just like learned from it actually. Like I, I learned from it, and before that I had no idea what I wanted to do, and I was like, just like, I'm going to college now, I have no idea what I'm gonna do, I'm just gonna do my gen eds, and then of course like 3 weeks in I'm like, okay, I think I know what I want to do. That's awesome. So then I was like, okay, I'll just continue to do my gen eds because either way I had to do them. So then I was like, and then I'll transfer and then major in that and then keep going.

So do you want to major in social work or do you want to major in like psychology? Do you know?

I'm not too sure yet. Social work, I like, I kind, I kind of want to do it, but I also have to explore like what else like there is within psychology and stuff like that, like where else path you can go.

Um, so like I think that I mean, my dad is very proud of me, but I think that like if he— if like he was here for me to ask him, he probably would have loved for me to have become like a doctor of psychology, you know, um, like a psychologist. You could be a psychiatrist.

Oh my God, there's so many.

And social work, like what I love about social work is you can do like so many things with it.

So yeah, you can go into like I actually looked it up. You can go into like bits, like you talk about it all, but like you can go like specialize in like one thing. Like, yes, like parenting or like kids or relationships or like all this stuff. And it's like, it's pretty cool how you can do that. And there's so much about that one thing. You would just think, oh, that's just like one thing. Like, what are you gonna get out of that? But like, there's so much to talk about over those.

There's so much. Like, for me, like, all of my training is like the parenting of the children with behavior issues and the marriage stuff. Like, those are the two things that I've mostly been trained on. But like, I had friends who went like the hospital social work route. I had friends who went the school social work route. Um, I have a friend who keeps telling me to get into a school. She's like, you need to be with kids in a school. What are you doing?

Because you said that you're good with like behavior, kids, like, and that's where like you would— Yes, like Spartan, I guess, because there, there is, and it's sad to say, like, I know a lot of like even growing up in the school, like nowadays, like now, like they need it. Like even if it's just like, because some kids like through the school, like even if it's behavior issues or them just struggling And there's a lot of it because if you're like, yeah, because if you're not behaving, like, you're like, there's someone else struggling, you know what I mean? Like, that's the issue.

And like, yeah, yep, I know. And they just keep adding social workers to schools and counselors to schools because I think that's what's most needed right now, right?

If you— because I know a lot of kids that don't have people at home to talk to. Like they're not close with their family. So when they go to school, they have their friends. And sometimes I know for a fact that even myself, like, I do not give the best advice in the world. I probably am like—

I bet you do.

Yeah, but sometimes it's like—

I know what you're saying.

Like, it's not like—

you're like, go see a professional.

Yeah, I'm like, I cannot help you with this, actually. Sorry about that one.

It's good that you know your limits.

Yeah, like, I mean, if something like crazy happens, like, I'm like, okay, you need to go talk to somebody. And I mean, like, that's like the best that I can do, but like, that's good because I'm not about to take that on of someone else because then that gives me stress about that. And then I'm like, are they doing fine? Are they fine? Like, what's going on?

I totally agree. And I want like the— like parents who will listen. I need more water. Sorry. No, you're okay. So parents who will listen to this, what's going to help them is you went to college not sure what she wanted to do, which I think is so normal. I don't know if you know that.

Yeah, I know a lot of people that—

like, that's so normal. Like, you don't have to have your whole life figured out at— are you 18?

Yeah.

Like, who knows their whole life plan at 18? Not many people.

I don't even know what I'm eating for dinner, so—

so yeah, so like, you're gonna figure it out and Social work has a ton of stuff, but if you don't do social work, there are so many options out there for you.

I think you just have to like learn about them. Yes, like you really have to write them with your life.

Tanner is back! Tanner is back! Well, and like even Max is like, what do you want me to do like career-wise? And I'm like, I want you to figure out what's going to make you happy. This isn't about me.

Yeah, and I think that's like something important that like I think I know some parents that like will actually get upset like about like what their kid does.

Oh.

And like, I'm like, okay, if they're like— there's a lot of things that are nowadays that are like, again, social working. Like I know when my mom, like she just talked to me about when she was younger, like there would be like no talk about it barely when she was younger. I know. And then all of a sudden, like it's just like right now seems to be like the spark of things. I— maybe because of COVID but I'm pretty sure it was like that even before.

Well, like, for, for your mom and I, like, we talk to our kids about their problems, and we even talk to, like, their friends about, you know, she probably helps your friends too, but, like, her parents probably didn't talk to her about her problems.

No, I think, I think my mom used to, like, hide it so then she wouldn't, like, there would nothing be an issue at the house. Um, but like, she always tells us that we don't have to like hide anything because I know exactly what happens when you are like mad at somebody. They're not gonna tell you and they're just gonna go behind your back. I already know it. Like, it's like, it's either—

please, man, they're not gonna tell you, which is sad. Yeah, like, um, my girlfriend just said to her daughter, you cannot talk about people behind their back. If you're not gonna talk to the person about what's going on, then you can't talk about it.

Yeah.

But I think that the other thing is, is that sometimes, like, I would say, like, Paige, I need to talk to you about this to figure out how to talk to the other person that I'm upset with.

Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like, can you help me?

Yeah, because that's not— that's your personal info. That's not somebody else's. And that's when, like, the difference between a rumor and starting drama gets very involved with that. Because it's one thing over the other. Like, sometimes people need to understand that, like, when something's said about something about you, you have to, like, take a step back and realize, like, okay, maybe they did this because they didn't know what to do with it, instead of going, you're talking about me, you're doing this, like, and there'll always be people like that.

But we could do a whole podcast on that topic. Tanner Greene. Um, What I wanted to tell you, just in case you need this for your paper, is that pre-KIDS, like the program that I was doing, we were like doing therapy in people's homes all day.

Okay.

So we were going from house to house. And what was awesome was that I saw like in the home what was going on versus in an office. So in an office, it's easier to hide things for an hour. And me showing up, they could like try to behave in their house for an hour and try to be on their best behavior. But it was easier for real things to come out when they're comfortable in their own house.

Yeah. You know, then someone like, even like if they're in an unknown place, they're not going to do anything. They're not going to even say anything because they know, like, it's— they don't know if it's a safe place or not.

Well, and hopefully they learn that it is, and hopefully they do talk. But that takes time.

Yeah.

You know, and like my girlfriend, um, who I used to work with, she sees clients all day in her office and she does that like 4 days a week all day and she loves it. So I mean, you know, like I said, you could do so many things. Yeah.

Yeah. Also another thing.

Yes.

What is your vlog like thing called?

So, um, so Seth named it Winey Palooza, um, 9 years ago.

All right.

And the kids, we have, we have 3 kids, they were always whining and we always had a party to take them to. So palooza is party. So he took party and whining and he's like, whiny palooza all over the place. So we call it Whiny Palooza.

Okay.

And it's a podcast, it's whinypalooza.com. You can actually go look up whinypalooza.com and see the whole website. Okay. It's @whinypaloozaMom on Instagram. It's Whiny Palooza on Facebook. So it's like all over the place and on TikTok, as you know.

As you know, I do know that.

Yeah, that's, that's anywhere you look it up, it'll just be Whiny Palooza and it's spelled funky. So I'll tell you how to spell it.

Okay. I think I'll be able to find it on TikTok too, because I don't think I find any, like, follow anyone like starting with whiny.

I think whiny is pretty rare. So, um, Palooza, how you'd think it was spelled, was taken, which is why Palooza— yeah, someone else must have Whiny Palooza spelled differently.

Okay.

So that's why Palooza is spelled weird.

Okay. That makes sense. That's funny how someone else has that.

Well, it's hard to take, like, you have to like buy a domain name. Okay. So you have to buy a name that nobody else has. Um, so I don't know, Seth figures that stuff out. That's not my job.

Yeah. I know. I know for a fact, if you like make up a username, it'll I'll say like, take it and use, like, yeah, add something, like add something.

Yes. So anything else to help you?

No, I think that's it. Um, another thing, what, going back a little bit, what was your highest degree if I didn't already ask?

My highest degree is a master's in social work. So that's a graduate degree.

Okay.

So I got my master's degree. Okay. I didn't go on, like you can get a doctorate in social work. So like I could go back and get my doctorate, but I, I stopped and I got my master's.

Okay, what would be the difference if you did get your doctorate?

So a doctorate would be like, you know, I have to do research to know beyond this, but like if I wanted to be like a professor of social work, okay, like they probably want you to have a doctorate. Um, if I wanted to do like a lot of doctorate degrees, like they do a lot of research work in social work Um, I don't really know what else I— for my purposes, I wouldn't really need it because the degree I got lets me do what I want to do.

Okay.

Yeah. So for me, it doesn't really make sense, but for somebody else who maybe wants to go be a full-time professor or something else, then it would make sense.

Yeah. No, that would make sense. But yeah, I think that is all my questions.

Do you have enough?

Yes, I do.

Oh my gosh, that was fun.

Yeah, it was. That was fun.

I knew it was going to be fun.

Yeah.

Well, um, this is Rebecca Green reminding everyone to spend every day laughing, learning, and loving. Thank you, Paige.

Thank you for tuning in to the Winey Palooza podcast. If you like what you heard, please be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode.

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