Episode 292: Get All The Stuff Out

Hello everyone, happy Winey Palooza Wednesday. We are going to talk about— we're going to talk about getting all the stuff out, but first we're going to talk about what we just did, which has to do with the topic.

Okay, okay.

So what did we just do, honey?

Uh, we, we, we loaded our car, two, two cars, trunks, back seats, front seats, mostly, um, filled with stuff that you had meticulously organized, labeled, tagged, and priced. Am I allowed to say where we took it?

Yeah.

And we loaded up in our cars and we took it to the Bella Kids pop-up consignment sale. So they are going to— uh, if you could see the rest of our, our, our room, you would see that there is a whole lot more room in our room because a lot of the giant American Girl doll Lily Playsets, vanish. We got the stuff out. Is that okay? So we didn't rehearse. I didn't know what you wanted.

Well, no, I love what you just said. So I want to give the Bella Kids sale a plug because it begins tomorrow.

They have to finish that all tonight and start selling tomorrow.

Oh, hi Kristen!

Kristen says hello.

Kristin is reading a book in her pajamas, and I'm very jealous because I want to get into my pajamas and read a book. I can't wait. I started The Housemaid, Kristin, already really good. Can't wait to go to my book. But first, we talk about getting all the stuff out.

Yes.

So I noticed that Lily wasn't playing with all the massive toys that I bought her really big expensive— see, Kristen says the book is really good, uh, The Housemaid. What?

Okay, I'm monitoring comments.

Okay, yes, okay, yeah, you can't play it on your phone.

Fixing it.

So I noticed Lily wasn't playing with her big expensive American Girl doll toys that I bought her. They're our generation toys, right, Lily? And they were taking up a ton of space. And I knew the Bella Kids Sale was coming. And the Bella Kids Sale starts tomorrow, but you have to buy a VIP pass to go tomorrow. Ah, Friday. Free sale Friday is the normal sale. Saturday is the normal sale. Sunday is, I believe, half price. And they are in Amherst. Look them up. Really packed. We just took all of our toys, a ton of toys there, and clothes that they have to get all that stuff done by tomorrow. Clothes, shoes, jackets, uh, toys, baby items. So I wish that I was more diligent about this sale when my kids were younger, and I wish I could have saved so much. We could have— I felt— I, I feel bad for how much money I spent on everything that I could have been buying at the Bella Kids Sale. Anyways, I have learned a lot.

It's one of the things Toys R Us meets Babies R Us on steroid explosion.

So it's one of the things that I want to pass on to you. So please tell a mother with young kids— they did have sizes up to size 14, so Ella could go shop. Ella and Lily can go shopping tomorrow if they want to.

They're not allowed to buy any of their own stuff back.

Okay, we're not gonna buy it.

Oh my God, I love that dress.

Stop, stop. We're not gonna bring any of the toys back. We're not gonna bring anything back. We just emptied out. Yes. So, okay, back up. I lost my thought. See, you interrupt me when I'm in the middle of a sentence.

Sorry.

It's okay, it's all right, you can speak. So anyways, it's a great sale and I'm passing this on to young mothers because, any mothers, because I wish that I was more diligent about the sale and my friend Jamie always told me about the sale and I would just go spend a fortune at the store and lessons learned. Yes, sizes up to 14. Yes, there were sizes up to 14. We did see what sizes they went up to tonight to see if we wanted to shop tomorrow and spend some of the money that we'll get back by selling our stuff. So, so I mentioned to Lily that she wasn't playing with her stuff, and I knew this sale was coming, and let's take this stuff to the sale and let's make money on it. And let's free up space in our house.

Yes.

So could I talk myself out of bringing the toys? Yes. How can I do that? I can do that by saying things like, well, my nieces would really like this, but how am I gonna get it to Virginia?

Right.

I have two nieces in Virginia who would, I literally, I was driving to the sale tonight thinking about my niece whose birthday is coming, who would love all of this stuff. And I was like, well, you don't have a moving van. I have a feeling that my brother-in-law and my sister-in-law would not be happy with me cluttering up their house, right, with all of these huge toys. Yes. But I do think that my nieces would have loved it. So I was feeling a little guilty for bringing it to the sale when I knew my nieces would like it.

Kristin loves a good purge.

And I'm changing, Kristin, because I really, I'm looking around this room and I'm like, wow.

You made a nice dent.

I made a nice dent. So I could say things like, well, my grandkids would like this in how many years?

Many years.

And aren't there gonna be new, better things for my grandkids? Yes. Okay.

Yeah, so we don't need to save this.

I could think about how I spent I spent so much money on these toys and how can I part with them after that? I could think about the sentimental value of seeing Lily playing with them and how can I possibly give that up? And what if she decides one day she comes downstairs and she wants to play with them and they're not here?

Oh no, whatever will we do?

So I could talk myself out of things, but we don't want to do that. We want to talk ourselves into things, into good things. Well, and the Bella Kids sale was perfect because it gave me a deadline. And when I have a deadline, I am really good at getting things done.

Yep. It's that nebulous, I'll do it someday.

So I think that the lesson is that there doesn't have to be a sale. It could be, I'm going to take 3 bags to Goodwill by Friday. And by the way, we took 7 bags to Goodwill and, and gave 2 or 3 bags to my friend of clothes.

So we're making progress. So she's doing great.

Tell me that's not progress.

It's progress, baby.

The sad part is there's a lot to go.

So we're making progress. It's visible progress.

So, so, so what I'm— what I wanted to start with is we don't want to talk ourselves into keeping things. We don't want to find reasons to keep things. We want to find reasons to get rid of stuff. Because when we unclutter our mind, and we unclutter— when we unclutter our home, we unclutter our mind.

I need to unclutter my office.

Yeah, it's like too much. I told Seth, we got to get rid of books. We have books everywhere. We all read. And there's books everywhere. So that is next along with the basement. So, bum bum bum, why don't we get rid of stuff? I want to talk about the basement. Seth has seen me do this many times. I will go down to our storage area, look around, get really overwhelmed, and walk back up the stairs. Yeah, and it drives him crazy. Yes, and he's like, just take a box, just—

yes, Kristen is volunteering to take our books to the library. We'll build you a big stack, Kristen.

We have a lot of books. We have a lot of books. So Seth is like, don't just leave the area, just like grab a box, just one box at a time, take a box upstairs. So I think that instead of looking at a space and saying, oh my God, this is so much, where do I start? Just start, just pick a corner, pick a box, pick an area, and just begin. And, and let's not get overwhelmed and shut down, which is what I have done many times.

Up until now when everything changed.

Well, so in the process of getting rid of toys, we also threw some stuff out from the basement.

Yes, we did.

Some garbage.

It is, our garbage can is full and we're gonna make it full every week.

So I call it the toy junkyard. And what my wonderful husband did is, well, I kept buying toys. I love toys. I kept buying toys, and our playroom at our old house and this house would get overrun with toys. So Seth would get frustrated, and he would pack up a crate and take it to the basement, which is great. I love that he was making space for us upstairs for her to help bringing more stuff in. Yes. However, now all of those crates are in the basement.

Yes.

And I was looking around, and it's a lot of broken toys. Like, it's not stuff that I would even want to give to people. I think a lot of it's going to go in the garbage. I hate to say it. And I am famous for loving piles of what am I gonna donate, what am I going to sell, which is very rare. I do not sell a lot of stuff. This was a rare occasion, wouldn't you say?

Yes, the Bella Kids sale. Yes.

I don't—

and Karen Cosmala says hi.

Hi, Karen. So yes, so am I gonna sell it, which is very rare for me? My friend sells a lot on Facebook Marketplace, which I have actually never tried.

You do the Buy Nothing, you give stuff away.

We actually did. Did we sell the playset on the Facebook Marketplace?

Yes, we sold the playset.

Okay, so I have sold one thing, one big thing, one huge thing from our backyard. So what did you say after that? What did you say?

You post stuff on Buy Nothing and give it away.

Oh, that's what I was gonna say. So I, I love to take things to Goodwill. I love to post things on the Buy Nothing site and have people get rid of it. And I love to give my friend clothes because she has 3 little girls and they're all smaller than Lily. So they— so when I give her clothes, 3 more kids are gonna wear the clothes. So all that clothes that you just gave them, they will all wear. So she's smiling. So it makes me feel better. So those are reasons. I'm finding reasons to want to get rid of stuff instead of talking myself into keeping things. But people have often said, well, my grandmother gave me this. So I think that it's okay to keep the teacup that I don't know, your grandma, I think she got them from all over the world.

Yes.

So like, I would never get rid of that. Like, how cool is that? It's pretty. It's special.

It's a sentimental pretty tchotchke.

But we can't add up and keep everything, right? Like, I was looking at Lily's dressers. And I was like, well, that was my aunt's. That was, that was, you know, this was grandma's, this was aunt's. We don't need to keep all the stuff, like maybe keep something small that doesn't take up a lot of room. We don't need to keep all the furniture. We don't have to keep all the clothes. Like I have said, oh, this was my favorite. I can't get rid of this. Okay, well let myself keep maybe a couple baby things. I don't even know why. Why am I keeping it?

Because you're attached, you have an emotional attachment.

We get so attached to stuff and then it adds up and then it clutters our house. I mean, everywhere I look, I don't know what is going on.

Now you can say everywhere you look, there's a little less clutter because we made a big dent.

So focus on the progress.

Yeah.

Okay, honey, I will focus on my progress.

Thank you.

Okay, so we spent too much. We didn't use it. We don't use it. We feel bad. How do we get rid of something that we spent too much money on?

You get over it.

Well, I think that we need to realize that we're not going to use everything that we buy. The famous thing that people talk about is their treadmills turning into coat racks.

We use our treadmill.

I— we definitely do. I'm just saying that a lot of people don't. And if you don't use your treadmill, it takes up a lot of space. Sell it or give it to someone who can't afford it.

Kristen says focus on the progress. And the treadmill, notice they fold up and the bars go up so you can hang clothes on them, so that if you use it as a laundry hanger, it holds the clothes. If they folded the other way, you wouldn't be able to hang your clothes on it, and they'd sell a lot less treadmills. That's my theory.

That was random.

Well, you brought up the treadmill and hanging clothes.

I'm just saying that if you have something in your house that was expensive but it's just taking up space and you're not using it.

Yes.

Find reasons to get rid of stuff.

Yes.

Let's get rid of the stuff that's holding us back. Somebody gave it to you. It was a present, right? But what questions do we want to ask ourselves? We want to ask ourselves, do we use this? Do we want this? Does this make me happy? Does this just clutter up my house? Do I ever even look at it? I was thinking about the fact that there is a ton of crates in the basement that I never look at.

Yeah.

So what that means is when I go down there, I don't start to find reasons to keep the stuff that I haven't looked at in years.

There's stuff you haven't touched since we put it down there when we moved in. Me too.

And it goes from apartment to house to house to house. Yes. And it's still down there.

Joette says, we ask, where should I start? LOL. Just grab something.

Well, I think that when I go down there, my, my biggest word is overwhelmed. It's very huge and overwhelming, and there's so many crates down there, and there shouldn't be so many crates down there because we don't use the stuff, right? So I know It's not going to be completely empty because I do use all the decorations. I do, I do have stuff that I go down there for that I actually use. I just brought up the Hanukkah stuff and put out Hanukkah stuff, so we are using the decorations. I know, I know, Lily is the queen of organization. Lily helped me clean, organize bring her pack— she didn't help pack the car, she helped unpack the car, and she waited in line, and she brought all of her stuff there, which means that we probably should give her a little bit of the money that we make for all the help she gave us. It's just a thought.

She had to have and then didn't play with. We could talk about it.

It's just a thought.

It's something to consider.

But I like to spend enough on her anyway in the next month. I like involving her in the process. And I like that she learned to get rid of stuff, donate stuff. And she's seeing that now families can go to the sale who can't afford the $200 toy and are getting it at a fraction of the price.

Yes.

So I like that people who probably couldn't buy the stuff can now go buy the stuff. That makes me really happy.

And it's going to a good home.

So I may have been a little bit sad on the way there. On the way home, I was like, it's out, it's out, I did it, the cars are empty! And yeah, that was huge, and I'm gonna give myself a pat on the back. And thank you for coming.

Of course.

So I went—

yeah, you were carrying all that.

I would have used a wagon. I could have brought a wagon out, by the way.

I saw that. I was like, oh, I wonder where they got that dolly thing from. But that was— I did not know that our drop-off time was the same drop-off time as 50 other people.

Oh, you didn't?

No. When you said we had an appointment, I thought it was we were pulling up right up to the door and taking our stuff in and being done.

Okay, so you thought the appointment was for one person or maybe a couple?

I did not expect there to be, you know, I mean, that was chaos. That was pure chaos.

That was calm.

Okay, well, you have different perceptions than I do.

Yeah, that was really calm.

Oh, I thought it was crazy.

And it was amazing that you came to help and that Lily came to help. Family teamwork. Get your family involved if you're overwhelmed. Get your family to help you. I bet you that I can get Lily engaged with bringing up a box. I just have to make sure she doesn't want to keep everything. Um, I may have let her take all of her dolls out of the crate tonight.

All of one type of doll, and all of meaning like 5 or 10?

It wasn't 10, it was like 5 dolls.

Okay, 5.

So we did tag dolls that she decided she couldn't part with, but she parted with so many toys.

She did.

She was very worried that you were going to be mad.

Yeah, well, you did the hard work to label those and pack them up. And she hasn't—

Hi Tiffany! Congratulations to Millie. Millie just made, um, North Chair.

Awesome! Yay Millie!

I am very jealous that she's got Coach Christina now at North to coach her. But anyways, we made major progress. I found reasons to get rid of the stuff. You're welcome. I found reasons to get rid of my stuff. I did not find reasons to keep it like I do all the time.

Just getting past that step is huge for you.

I didn't get overwhelmed. I took it step by step. I tagged it. I was overwhelmed today. Did you notice that?

I wasn't home.

Yeah, you came home and you said, "Not a big deal." Oh, yes.

And I said, "It's a big deal." You seem to have absorbed some stress about this process, and I didn't know why you were allowing them to stress you out.

We got home from conferences. We went to parent-teacher conferences tonight and we were leaving and Seth was like, okay, let's go home and load the cars. And I was dreading it the entire day because I was so worried. And I was like, okay, well, I'll tell you what I did wrong and I will learn from this. So the whole day I was stressed about loading the cars with these big toys and I was like, they're not going to fit. How many cars do we need? How many trips do we need? And I was like, oh my Oh my God, I don't know how this is gonna go down. And Seth is calm as a cucumber, walks in the house, starts taking stuff to the car, is like, it'll fit, no big deal. We have this big shop market, FreshMart. FreshMart. I'm like, it's not gonna fit. He's like, we're gonna— it's gonna fit. Let's just start, Rebecca. See, let's just start. And it all fit in two cars.

Miracle.

We didn't even have to bug Max to follow us because he was like, I'm busy. And I was like, well, you might have to help. So I learned that I dreaded loading the cars all day for nothing.

And you were worried about other stuff, them accepting the stuff.

Yes, yes, yes.

We didn't have any issues.

Well, it's like asking about do the batteries work and blah, blah. I just— it's a lot to think about. And it's not something that I'm good at. It's just something that I decided to do. My very good friend helps run the sale and told me it was coming. And I was like, here's your opportunity, clean it out. So it's a good motivator. So you don't need a sale to motivate you, just pick a goal and pick a date so that you get it done. Right?

Amen.

So I want to—

deadline.

So I want to hear what is one of your goals in your house? I want to clear out the basement. I'm also clearing out Girl Scout stuff that I keep finding all over the house. I want to clear out the basement. What is your goal? Tell us your goal. Tell us that you're going to start. Tell us when you would like to be done by. I have how many crates down there?

A lot.

I mean, I don't know how long that's going to take me. How do I have a goal for that?

Okay. How about your goal is progress? One crate a day. And even if there's 50 crates, then you're done in less than 2 months.

I will tell you, one crate a day feels like a lot.

All right, I'll do one crate a day.

And there you go, you'll just throw it all out.

Yes. Well, Christian says, you know, I love to clean and organize. What drives me is piles in my space.

Ah, yeah.

Well, we do need to throw a lot of it out.

A lot of it is just going to be thrown out.

I'll just bring a box up every day and you'll look through it and we'll toss it or keep it.

Okay, we're on a mission.

I'm gonna do the first one tomorrow.

Okay. Let's do it.

You heard it here first.

We are going to clear out our basement. We cleared out our playroom. We are going to—

there is some stuff that could still go. There is some more stuff.

She still has toys. She didn't get rid of her kitchen. I mean, she is 11.

There is a lot of progress, though. There is a lot of good progress.

There is a lot of good progress. Let's focus on the progress and let's keep our momentum going.

Yes, I love that.

Teamwork. Well, and momentum is what it is all about. So I said I get overwhelmed. I go and I leave the basement and walk up the stairs and have done nothing. So it's just about momentum. I just have to start. And then you just keep the momentum going.

Awesome. As soon as I walk in the door from work tomorrow, I'm going upstairs and bringing you a box.

You know, I have a really busy night tomorrow.

I'm still bringing up a box.

I can do it in the morning.

2 minutes.

I can do it in the morning.

I know what box we're starting with. And I know it's mostly garbage. And you're going to look at and go, okay, we can throw this out. Okay, keep the momentum. It'll be progress.

Okay, well, I feel good. I'm gonna let you know the next two nights are very busy.

Okay, you have two minutes, I promise.

I have two minutes to approve it being trash?

Yes.

Okay. You also have a full garbage can.

I have other garbage cans.

Okay, he's on a mission, people. We're not finding reasons.

Ah, we gotta wait till after garbage day.

No, we don't. I'll cram it in there. I'm good at finding reasons not to do things. Let's find reasons to do things.

Yes, please.

And let's not talk ourselves out of getting rid of stuff.

That's right. Let's get rid of it.

Get rid of it. Clear the space. So tell me your goals. I want to hear.

And Melissa says, do it, do it, do it.

Melissa, have you been here? Did you hear that we got rid of huge toys?

Two carloads worth of stuff.

Two carloads worth of toys. From the playroom just went to a sale. It's fun. So, so people who find organization fun, you're hired, by the way. Okay, Melissa and Kristen, you're gonna have to educate me on why you find it fun.

Doesn't it feel better when you got it all nice? Okay, organized.

Let's be clear, the end product is fun, right? She's proud of me. I did so much work. So much work, cleaned it, organized it, tagged it, brought it to the sale, replace the batteries. You did the battery part. You're the battery man. Melissa would be very proud of me. Kristen's proud of me. Kristen and Melissa are organization masters. Me, not so much. And I don't find joy in the process. I find joy in the results.

Well done. Enjoy the results.

But I need to find joy in the process. So if you can educate me on how to find joy in the process, let me know because I would love to learn. Changing my perspective on it. What can I do? So share this with somebody who needs motivation to get started or who you think loves to organize and can help me. Yes. And listen to our new podcast on Friday. And please, I love when you rate it, review it, share it, all the fun stuff. I have so many interviews lined up, lots of good people coming, so I'm excited for that. I just interviewed Dr. Cheryl about the war in Israel, so you're going to like that. She had such good advice.

Kristen says, don't let it overwhelm you. Small jobs are better in this sense. You are 100% right, Kristen.

The basement is not so small, but it needs to be tackled.

It is small if you do one box at a time.

We're going to do one box at a time.

Baby steps.

I'm— listen, I am not capable of spending days in the basement, so we will bring a crate.

I don't have enough garbage cans for you to do days in the basement.

I don't want to do the basement in like a couple days. I want to do the basement over time.

Let's do it.

So the goal is to fill the garbage cans every week.

Let's do it.

Okay, I told you I will do it with you.

Let's do it.

Okay. Well, thank you for joining us. I hope that you are clearing out some space too. We don't like clutter. None of us like clutter. I don't think I have found anybody who likes clutter.

There's a whole show about people who love clutter. No, hoarders.

No hoarders. I don't know that hoarders like the clutter. I think they don't know how to get rid of the clutter.

Okay, they make up reasons to keep the clutter. Melissa says pics or BS. Just do it. I don't know what that means. Is that a typo? Do you know what she's talking about?

I'm thinking—

I got nothing, Melissa.

She's saying just do it. So let's just follow her advice.

Okay.

Okay. So we are going to move on to pajamas and books and bed. I'm very predictable, aren't I?

I love it.

Okay. Well, thank you so much for joining us.

And, um, oh, she says take a picture of the full trash can each week.

Why are we doing that?

Monitor, uh, are you— progress? Are you— are you saying pics or BS? So either take pics or you're not doing it. Prove it.

Oh, do it. Track your progress.

Oh, something like that.

Oh, I love that. Okay, she's gonna hold me accountable.

Yes, there you go. You got an accountability buddy.

It's like my friend who stopped by the other day. And we were talking about how I'm so good at making appointments for the kids and I'm so terrible at making appointments for myself. And she's like, I'm going to follow up on you and make sure that you've made some appointments for yourself.

It's awesome. Okay, we got pictures of garbage coming up, Melissa.

Okay, thank you everyone for joining us and have a wonderful week. Thank you for tuning in to the Winey Palooza podcast. If you like what you heard, Please be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. While you are there, leave a review. I love to hear your feedback. Thank you so much for listening. Until next time.

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