The Whinypaluza Podcast with Rebecca Greene Episode 062 Inspiring Parents and Kids

No need to whine, it's Whiny Palooza! Have some wine and join us on the Whiny Palooza podcast with Rebecca Green.

Welcome to the Whiny Palooza podcast. I'm your host, Rebecca Green. I'm a wife, mother of 3, and licensed clinical social worker. I also have 3 fur babies at home too. My passion has always been to help children and their families. I always dreamed of being a wife and a mother. Parents are always learning through their struggles, failures, and successes and joys. I am no stranger to this wild ride of parenting, and I know behind every great parent lies a team of supportive friends and family. I want to be part of your support system. I want you to know that you are not alone. We are in this parenting world together. Join me every week for insightful discussions with experts on parenting and marriage, as well as other parents who have found the secret to successes in parenthood. You'll learn tips and tricks to make life with your family better than ever. I hope you will follow along with me while we dive into what it takes to achieve a happy family.

This is Rebecca Green for the Whiny Palooza podcast, and I'm over the moon excited because I have Marcy Abramsky on my podcast today. Marcy, as an LCSW— I'm screwing up already— as an LCSW, Marcy uses her training and 20+ years of combined experiences to assist you within her scope of practice. She pulls from years doing this in homes, schools, agencies, and in private practice in cities and suburbs of New York and Buffalo. By actively listening, she gains a full assessment, allowing her to assist you in fostering change. In addition, you can look forward to having a guide in this process of visualizing goals and gaining a feeling of empowerment. As you build visions toward change, you may start to get inspired. Marcy is empowering children, preteens, adolescents, adults, parents, and families. She's motivating people to shift their mindset, focusing on strengths, helping with student transitions in school, back to school, and with job changes, calming anxiety, helping with caregiver stress, helping to cope with chronic illness. She also has a telemental health training certificate. As an experienced licensed clinical social worker, it is Marcy's honor to assist you in exploring your core issues and moving toward a healthy, fulfilling life. She offers family, group, and individual online therapy sessions in and around East Amherst and all of New York State. Marcy, thank you so much for doing this with me today.

Thank you for having me, Rebecca. I'm so excited.

How is it possible? How is it possible that we're old enough for 20+ years of experience? Like, we're not that old.

I think while you said that, I like covered my face or I cringed. It was exciting to say I'm experienced, but not exciting for that. And I put that on somewhere online and I'm like, I know.

Awesome. You have so much to share with us. I'm, you know, I've been like so excited to have you on. And I wanted to, I want to tell everyone, I told you I have to tell people how I know you. So I met Marcy back in preschool.

Okay.

Mind-blowing. And then walked into graduate school and saw you, and we recognized each other. I mean, like, that's crazy.

Well, I think we looked pretty similar. I mean, we weren't as short, you know.

Yeah, well, that— you know what, that's a compliment to both of us that we recognized each other. And we reconnected after many years and have been like so close since, and she's so experienced and so knowledgeable. And I really appreciate you being willing to do this with me today.

Oh my gosh, thank you. I really appreciate you having me. I really do. And one thing about you is I couldn't miss you if I saw you anywhere because you have such a beautiful smile and you always have just this glowing personality that pulls people in. So I wouldn't have missed you anywhere.

Don't make me cry. You're gonna make me cry. Well, I love you.

It's true. Anybody that watches this would already know that.

Well, I love you so much, and I think you're amazing, and I want to— I'm going to learn more about you through this, so I'm excited. So let me—

let's—

I for sure. Let's start at the beginning and tell us what inspired you to go into social work.

Okay, well, um Sure. Okay. So I went to University of Buffalo for undergrad and I, it was at that point, I really didn't know living in the dorms that you could talk about your feelings. Um, and I had a bunch of incredible roommates. Um, and you know, people were like, yeah, and talk about that. I'm like, you talk about that? Oh, I didn't know. I was like, that's really cool. Um, I don't know if I should, and you know, I didn't really know you could talk to people about things. I don't, I don't know why. So, and then I also worked at a counseling center at University of Buffalo and really, really enjoyed it. And lastly, what really I think helped me to figure this out was that I did an internship. I graduated college about a semester early and I did an internship during that time at Channel 2 News and I realized that after interviewing people, all of a sudden I was asking more questions about them and, you know, getting into things that were just more about their lives. And I realized, nope, I think I'm more of a counselor and this is really what I wanna do. And then every job after job after job, I was just more passionate about the field. So.

Oh, well see, I already learned stuff about you. And I'm so glad that you were drawn to the field because you're really good at it. And I have talked to you for over 20 years about my issues, and I know how good you are.

So are you.

We're not talking about me today. This is the—

I'll interview you another day on your show.

Let's do that. Oh, you're amazing.

Let's do a reverse. Can I like have a day where I play you? That would be really cool.

Can we do that? I love that idea.

Like, it's like teacher for a day. I think that'd be so cool. I wouldn't know how to do it, but I'll try.

Yeah, you would, you would nail it. I have no worries about that. You have been doing social work for so many years. Tell us what led you to start your private practice and the idea behind Inspire a Mind.

Sure. So basically, um, I was working in schools all over the place, agencies, and after a while— and the biggest thing for me wherever I was was follow-through. And parents would always tell me, and my bosses would always tell me, you know, you don't— well, actually, the people I worked for would always tell me, well, you don't have to impress us. You don't have to go that far. And I'm like, no, that's kind of who I am. And I, I couldn't like go to sleep at night unless I knew, you know, things weren't always resolved, but unless I knew I've taken every step that I could, which is generally why I think I have really good relationships with parents. And so, and I did a lot of parent work even in school, like I would invite them in and we would do some sessions. And it was more, I mean, I couldn't really do family work in but you had to, to some degree, depending on what happened. I mean, you have to include the parent, and I was always in a middle school, and it really supported the kids. And when I worked, um, as an assistant administrator in summer schools, I would always have parents in, whether it was middle through high school, because it helped parents understand where kids were at. So I think the biggest thing for me is that Private practice offered me an opportunity to work with more people, to work in a different capacity with people, and to explore more, you know, with them. At the same time, I started writing programs and guides. I wrote a bunch of programs for schools, things I had tried out in schools, you know, Discipline with a Purpose programs where it wasn't just, um, in-school suspension. It wasn't about that. It was about learning. And, um, I wrote a bunch of programs and guides for parents in crisis, um, crisis programs for school violence, crisis programs, um, for— in actuality, during the pandemic as well. And I'm working on getting those out. Um, so yeah, so the Inspire Mind idea was I also wrote a mindset program for summer school because I felt like I was like, you know what? Yeah, you're in summer school, but in order to motivate you, you gotta get some certificates that you can bring home. You gotta get something good. Your parents need to see something. It can't be all negative because how are you gonna feel positive? And they were like, what is this? And then after they kept getting weekly reports on what they were doing great, their whole attitude about themselves changed. So we watched that happen. So it was really an incredible experience.

So I love that so much and I love the name you came up with, Inspire a Mind. It's, it's perfection. It's a fabulous name.

Thank you. Yeah. And it's, it's, I got the trademark and I was really excited. And so, um, yeah, I'm really excited to get those programs out and, you know, to get some guides out to parents, just some like tips and some support for, for them and, you know, see, see if some things work for people. I mean, everybody's different.

So, and we can— we will talk, but we can put links when they're ready. We can put links to this show so that parents can get them. So I would love— I would love to do that. So I know your practice has evolved. Can you tell us who you serve?

Sure. So I basically serve everybody. Um, and the only thing I don't do is couples therapy. I have a wonderful marriage. I just it just wasn't something I ever had a lot of experience with. So I don't really go out of the scope of practice that, you know, that I have experience in. So I do serve adults. Um, I obviously parents, adults.

Yeah.

Um, and, and I serve parents, meaning I serve blended families. Like I serve, so if there was, you know, some stepparents, some whatever, you know, I'll serve you all. Okay. Yeah. And, and I don't charge anymore. To serve, you know, mom, dad, stepdad, stepmom, you know, it doesn't matter. So all the parents, it's fine. And I serve teens, preteens. I don't do STAN therapy or any small kids. It's just not something I was trained in. But I also serve seniors and caregivers. Because I think that that's a very important population. So, but I just do so much because of my background, because for all these years I've done a lot of classroom education. I do a lot of groups, and I also work with kids and parents on transition, especially through this pandemic transition. If you were remote transition— and everybody was remote at some point— and transition back with friends, which has been a big deal, and transition to the next school year or to the next school, whether it's middle school or high school or college. Yes, I have, I have people that have wanted— oh, I'm so sorry, I don't want to interrupt.

Finish your sentence. Finish.

I'm so sorry, I can just talk over you, it's fine. I, I, I have, I have people that come back from college and are home and like need a little support and he has to go back. And this has been crazy college time. So I'm so sorry. Please continue, my friend.

No, you have amazing things to say.

And I like to talk.

I have two questions related to what you're talking about because you talked about two very important things. Okay. So number one is socialization. And I have told you, I believe that I have really dropped the ball with my two older kids and really am focusing Listen, I'm really focusing on getting face-to-face friend time, and I want you to— can you give us some tips, like, sure, with socialization with our kids? Because it's gone down so much this year.

Yes. So first of all, I cannot even imagine that you've dropped the ball because you are super mom. So I'm going to put that out there, whether it was on your podcast or it was just, you know, quietly in a room, there's no way. But, but I will, I will, um, give you some tips. So I will, I will first say, um, that, you know, after speaking with my own children and speaking with some friends' children, and I do term it like the friend, the real friend reboot, because I, I do feel that, um, there are kids that parents will look at and even say, oh my God, I think my child is depressed. They're not reaching out. They're not calling their friends. They're not even texting. And one of my daughters is like, I don't want to see any of my friends until I can really get together and do this with them, until I can swim with them, until I can do whatever. And is that okay yet? You know, and then one of my children talks to her friends all the time. And sees them on FaceTime. But I think that, you know, when we've started to, you know, kind of let the kids do some things like that, but I was the like remote queen and I realized, hmm, that left me with a social challenge. Okay. So I don't, and I learned from my mistakes. I am very honest about that. Okay. And I don't know if I'd call it a mistake or if I'm looking back at my choices because, you know, we did it for certain reasons. But right now it's a challenge because learning how to restart relationships and also children who are remote seeing, feeling left out, like some of the friends were in groups and now they're not. So being able to talk to your child, number one, about getting back into a group or getting back, you know, you were playing a sport. So let's say you're a child in the sport or drama, right, or music, okay, you're into all those things, but maybe those things weren't going on to that level. Maybe you're not with those kids, maybe all the kids weren't there and you didn't have that connection with friends that you were very close with. So you're missing you know, Sarah or Joe or whoever it is. You're missing that group and they were with some other kids or you were all mixed up for remote when that happened. So I found that my kids felt like they weren't with certain kids and that's a challenge sometimes. So it's helping your child take the first step toward getting together. Depending on their age, it might be to reach out to the parent and if they're older It's really helping your child to do that. Now sometimes it takes what I call like this special time. There was one day I, one day I had left the house and I had, I had texted one of my kids or called them and I said, listen, meet me at the door. You don't even need shoes. They were like, what? I picked them up. All they had on was socks. That way they couldn't get away from me, right? Because I mean, if you have a teenage kid, you don't know, they might just get out of the car, right? So my kid would never leave the car, okay? But you don't know, right? Some of the kids— but she was so confused, it was fun. Picked her up in only socks, right? Okay, so picked her up, and I actually— this was, this was when I was living in Long Island, but I do it here too. And I drove her to a parking lot then. But here I drove her to Panera. Okay, so we'll, we'll just go to Panera here. So quickly, I drove her to Panera. We drove through the drive-through, I got her some lunch, and we parked in the parking lot. All right, we tried to park where there— it's very crazy there, but we tried to park where there wasn't anybody. And in that parking lot, they got some nice music going on in the plaza, right? And of course, that's when it wasn't very busy, and somebody had to park right next to me and I'm like, we're gonna move. So we opened up the sunroof. You don't have a sunroof, open up your trunk, sit there. And we had lunch and over lunch sitting together, not at the house. And she's like, this is why I didn't need socks. I said, yes. Okay. We're sitting there and she goes, what? I'm like, well, I love you. So just listen. So we sat there and we had a conversation about how to restart things, what to do. And then I said, okay, so now I want to play a game. And I said, I want to test what you know about me and what I know about you. And that's what we did. And we ate lunch and we just played a game about one another. If you have to start with that or you have to end with that, and it was great. And then she was able to come home and feel like the next day she could make that reconnect. And I didn't tell her, you don't have to tell me now, but you plant the seed. They do listen. Even kids, even kids that seem tough to get through, you know, this is why sometimes strangers— strangers— counselors and other people get through to your kids because they're not— they're the play people, they're the people that hang out. So it gives you that opportunity to see and be with your child in a different light. So you don't always have to go somewhere, but it's nice to get them where they can't leave you.

Well, and you said, you said so many things, Marcy. You said, first of all, that we have to encourage them to take first steps. That's huge. And you also said, you know, that they are listening. They do hear us, whether they admit it or not.

And it won't probably.

The other thing that is so important that you do with your kids that I love is you make sure to spend time with them individually. And I feel like we get so much more out of our kids when we're private with them versus surrounded by the whole family.

It's not easy.

It's not easy, but you're good at, you're good at that. You're really good at that. And you know, there's, there's enough, you know, this is, this is your expertise. I'm not good at this. Stuff. And I will tell you that as we transition, you know, Max is going to high school, Ella's going to 7th grade, Lily's going to 4th grade. I mean, they're all transitioning, whether it's from one school to another or one grade to another. Give us some pointers to help our kids have smoother transitions.

Sure. So, okay, so yes, and, and I have a daughter that, um, that is going to— I can't even Say it. Jamie's going to middle school. Okay. Having worked in a middle school, middle school, having worked in a middle school for middle school. Okay. Having worked in middle school for so long, I can't believe, you know, when it's your youngest. Yeah, I'm over it.

I get it.

No, no. And you know, I'm always like, well, if you have any questions about middle school, don't worry. And then here I am actually. You know, having worked in one and having probably seen the worst, there's so much good about it. And I personally hated it. I'm really sorry, anybody that's out there and was my teacher. It just wasn't a good time. It's a bad time, hormonally, everything. But we were talking about some, some tips, right? I got it. So, yeah. I'm focusing on my child. Okay, so no, okay, so the tips, uh, for middle school are basically to remember, put COVID aside, okay? Because all of our kids right now are just thinking about their next grade. Basically, that's what their focus is. And, um, basically it's some reassurance about next year. It's, um, if they seem nervous, the basic things are their locker, and making sure they have a combination that they can open and practicing that. It's trying to get in when they say you can get in. It's also talking to them about things that are going to be happening there and getting them to understand you may see X, Y, and Z and being realistic. Not every school, but you may walk into the bathroom and you may see kids doing A, B, and C. And I don't know if that's okay for parents to understand, but kids may be doing something that you're not comfortable with. If you feel uncomfortable and you need to leave the bathroom and go to another one, that's fine.

Yes.

If you can use the bathroom, great. Um, under most circumstances, unless you see somebody getting hurt, I would not advise getting involved. If you need to go tell somebody, that would be the best way to handle it. I don't, I don't advise that because it puts your child in a tough situation. Just letting somebody know is the best way to handle it and letting that person know that you don't want your name involved. Getting very comfortable with the guidance counselor or somebody in the building that you can go to. And I think just remembering as a parent, and I think you and I have talked about this, Remembering that whatever we give off, which is why I do it in my office and not out there, whatever we, whatever we give off just goes on to them. Yeah. So they become little anxious beings if that's what we are. Yes. And they stay calmer if we stay calmer about it, at least in public with them.

Okay.

No, I'm really fine with it, to be honest.

But we can vent to each other, to our friends.

Absolutely.

But not to our child.

Absolutely. And you know what else? They have fears like, basically, are my friends going to stay my friends? Are my teachers going to be nice? OK. This is basically— am I going to be to class late? OK. That's right. Those are like their basic fears. And, you know, you can squash that with, um, listen, there's a period of time for every year in the beginning where they allow you to be late because you have to find your classes, okay? And, you know, your teachers want you to feel comfortable, especially we're moving into a year from a year that was very difficult. You know, it's easy to squash a lot of these. And then, you know, watch your child's behavior early on. If they seem you know, a little bit uncomfortable, whatever it is, make sure that you're touching base with them. Or sometimes, I'll be honest, I throw an email to the guidance counselor just to let them know, hey, maybe if you see my kid, ask them how they're doing, do a check-in, that kind of thing. Say you're checking in with a bunch of kids, I'll just tell them to, you know.

That's really good advice, and, and I don't think parents do that enough, and I think they forget that there's people at school on their side who can help them. And I have to remind myself to reach out, and I did. I did this year and got phenomenal help for my daughter. So I'm glad that I did. Yeah, you're right. You're right.

Absolutely. Using people at school. Yeah, people at school.

Can I move on to anxiety? Because you're talking about anxiety.

Totally. Anxiety, squishies, pop-its. You know, my daughter introduced me.

My daughters are obsessed, but anxiety is up.

Okay, depression is—

anxiety's up, depression's up. Um, we were so focused on COVID and health, and, and mental health was going down as health was going up. I felt like personally, as I observed everything. Um, can you give us some, some tips for our kids with anxiety and depression?

Yes. Um, so basically I feel like at this point we need to realize that we, we went through and are in still a pandemic. Yes. So I realized that what I was upset about was school, even as a parent, and what I got worked up about myself Oh, well, I need to chill because we're like in a pandemic. Like, yes, I want A, B, C, and D, but I need to chill. And which is on your shirt, chill. Yes, it is. Now we're allowed to feel these things, and so are our kids. We're allowed to want certain things. And you know, I'm sure my superintendent was thinking the same thing when I made that call. However, however, I also had to back up and think about what we were all dealing with. So I think the best thing for our kids is to understand what they've all gone through and that they've— it's incredible because when we went through something like 9/11, the world was turned upside down, in my opinion. So when I look at our kids and their age, I can't imagine being this age and going through something like this when you're home, you're isolated, everybody's supposed to be home for a period of time, everything is closed. What the— everything's closed? Pizza places are— what? Okay, you know, you're a kid, you can't go for ice cream. What was that? Okay, you got to ration toilet paper. My mom can't afford— what, the toilet paper is expensive? So I'm thinking about kids and I'm thinking about, wow, they just got through something like as big as like 9/11 to them, right? So I'm thinking their world was upside down. So just acknowledging what they went through and that they got through, I believe, the hardest part. And what we're in now, I think, is a complicated part because it's not, it's not isolation and it's not complete freedom, except there is much more freedom, which is positive, but it can be confusing to kids because some kids can do more, some kids, their parents are not comfortable. It's very awkward. Yeah. So it's an awkward stage. Yeah. But I think that helping kids to see that there's positivity and that the future is brighter now, and look how much has opened, look how many things we have now, you know, helping them to see the positives in the following year, in their future. You've gotten through this. You know, we're getting through this is so important to change their outlook and their mindset. And mindset, and I use that word, and I know some people kind of cringe because it was the it word for so long.

No, I love it.

I use it because the way we see things is so important for changes in behavior. The way we look at it. I never even realized so long ago that the way I would look at something could impact how I would deal with it. So just helping them change their view about it just changes everything, and it changes the way they respond to people and things. So, you know, it's such a big— I'm here.

Yes, Marcia's here to teach them, so please reach out to her.

Well, you can too. I mean, parents can, can do it also. And, you know, parent— again, if parents have a positive outlook, it's it's gonna go to the kids too. And summer, they need this. So summer's a really good time for them to just get lost in the positivity, the good weather, relaxing, and restart. It's like a restart year. So—

I hope so. I'm like, let's regroup, let's reset, and let's restart, right?

Totally. I mean, journaling is great. Even, even communication through a notebook. If you have a kid that's not a good, you know, not a comfortable person that speaks, getting a notebook, letting them pick one, whatever it is, and having them write in it when they feel something, or leaving it somewhere, or once a week asking them to, to write to you, and it'll be kept private between you if you have other, other kids.

Such good advice.

Yeah, so, well, thank you.

Well, and I will tell you that if Lily and I get into it, she will go away and cool down and write me a note, and it's so special to me. She doesn't—

Jamie does that.

I love it so much. I know she doesn't want to talk, but she wants to get it out on paper, and she usually apologizes, and my heart just melts.

Do you ever A lot. Like, I've saved all the old ones because both my kids used to do that, and the spelling, the spelling was so cute. So when I read it, I'm trying to remember what word they were trying to say to me.

Oh, that's so cute.

But yes, it is very adorable.

Let's talk about empowering ourselves and our children. Can you give us— I love that word, and I know you love that word. Can you give us some tips on empowerment?

So empowerment is an interesting word because, um, I mean, it's just feeling the strength that, that you have within you. And I think a lot of us are having trouble, especially at this time, finding where our strengths lie because we've been struggling with this time to help our kids to help ourselves, to help people in our lives. So I mean, one of the things that I focus on is using the strengths perspective and really helping people find their strengths within them— I'm sorry— and for kids too. And that's a really good way to actually work with kids and work with your own kids. And I'm sure that you you do that, it's a really good tip to help them come out of their funk or their anxiety too, to look at their strengths. I mean, the things that you've seen in them throughout this. It's funny, I sat down with my daughter right before we did this and I said, you know, I don't know if I've told you, but, 'cause I was reading the question, I'm just thinking to myself, I was reading what I was gonna talk about and I was just like, you know, Forget this. I wanted to let you know that I've seen such an incredible change in you this year and just the positive outlook that you've had through everything because she didn't see a lot of friends. And, you know, she just kind of got red and smiley and, you know, and I'm like, wow, why? You know, I wish I had told her sooner, you know, and I just think it's so important that they know their strengths. So I think empowerment comes from within, but it also comes from, I think, especially for kids, from parents. It can help them. And also it can come from one another, our friends. I mean, it helps to have that support system, our family. But feeling empowered right now is so important. And we can also get that parents— with parents, with one another, if we talk with one another. You know, in parent groups, even forming your own, getting together in an evening and all just kind of hanging out and talking and just being like, so what did you do to deal with this when your child said, you know, a lot of us are dealing with very similar things.

So, and that is so true. And I also love when my friends have kids who are similar ages or older, because a lot of the times, like, if their kids are older, they've already gone through a lot of the stuff that I'm going through.

Yes.

You know, and I noticed during my vlog one week, Lily was sitting next to me and she said, Mom, I helped you too, right? And I was like, oh my God. I was like, I don't acknowledge my kids enough and the fabulous things that we do. And I think that we all get so wrapped up in the busyness of the day that we have to sometimes just stop and tell our kids something wonderful that they did that day and point it out to them. And I'm like, I don't do that, and I really want to start doing that for them.

You know, it's something that I realized too. Like, I'll be hurried, I'll be rushing to do something, and then I'll be like, oh, was I— I don't know how I came off. So I'll text because they have their phones because now they're They have their phones, they have their computers. So I'll be like, I just want you to know that I love you and you looked beautiful this morning. And I'll send a text, you know, and then it's just—

they love that—

the day, you know. I— and I think it's important, you know, my husband and I do that too because I feel like it's just— it's important that you leave things on a nice note. I hate if somebody says something to me at the beginning of the day and it's It just changes my mood sometimes. Yes. You know, and that too. Okay. Gotta change my thought process about my day now.

Well, and you're talking, we're talking about like little things that people don't realize are so big and sending, sending my husband a text, sending my daughter a text, they eat that stuff up. So, so do your little things because they're not so little.

Correct. Absolutely.

Let's talk about you for a couple minutes. What challenges—

Angie, no, no.

What do you think your biggest challenge is that you're dealing with right now?

My biggest challenges, um, probably— oh, that's a tough one. I just—

I think so much, so much going on. You have so— no, so much going on, just managing. There's so much that you manage.

There, there is. I think my biggest challenge I just got over, because I for years had a teacher planner like, like a book, and then I went all digital like everyone else. And you know what? I missed my book.

Me too.

This may sound really dumb, but— and I know there's no stupid answers, no stupid question, and I say that to everybody else, but I had to buy myself a paper planner because I need to see it. So then you know what I did? The first thing I wrote in it. Yep. The first thing I wrote in this thing I never put in my phone planner, right?

Yeah. Yeah.

So I missed it.

Yep. Yep.

So I just, I only put it in one. So I'm like, wait a second. So I need to write it. I need to put it in, but it's better for me because I'm kind of— when I write things, it's just better for me. So I think I got that now. It's just because I have a lot of commitments to a lot of people, but this is very important to me to continue to work with clients and to also, you know, continue to be there for the kids. And I think that being able to work from my office here and being able to do the teletherapy is so much better for me. And it's easier for clients sometimes because it's convenient. And I can be more flexible with times. Yeah. If they need evening, sometimes I even do a lunchtime time for people. It's just so much easier.

I agree. And there's no driving time that they have to fit into their work schedule.

There is no driving. And if it is local in the area, I will also go to, if the weather's nice, I mean, if it's kids, I'll meet outside if there's a place or I'll meet at a, you know, wherever people need. But otherwise, the teletherapy is working out very nicely.

That's awesome. Awesome thing that we have access to, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Like, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to use it. And I'm pretty good with the computer, but it's incredible.

So if I can use it, I have no doubt that you can use it. Oh yeah.

I mean, but if I can do it, pretty much anybody can, because, you know, I'm like, how do I get on this? I can't even see your podcast. Wait. And I'm just like, so I mean, if I can use it, I am confident that anybody can press on the link.

So tell us the best advice you have ever gotten.

So the best advice I have ever gotten really is, I think what I go by now in my practice is that every challenge is really a possibility. It's a new opportunity. So that I hope people can see that. I think when you're in the moment and when you're in the challenge, it doesn't always feel that way. But I really believe that the challenges that we face Even through COVID, there are things that are very, very difficult that life throws at us. But there are opportunities there for growth and for change in our life. And I hope that through either working together or people thinking about it differently, that that can be seen.

That's excellent advice. I love that. Thank you so much. Can you give us, give parents one action step that they can take just to do better for their kids starting today? Just one action step you would recommend.

I think that this is one thing. I think that modeling for your children that you can, and you may do this, that you can apologize when you've made a mistake is huge. I don't think you need to apologize for nothing, but I think we do make mistakes. And I think modeling in general is, is very important, but I think that's so powerful. And I think we want our children to do that, and I've made mistakes, and I think when you do, you know, I mean, you don't walk around going, sorry, you know, but, but when it's appropriate, I think it's super important because when you model the behavior that you want to see, it does happen.

Yes, yes, such good advice. You have so much wisdom to share. Oh, I love it, I love it. Tell everyone where they can find you, how they can sign up to, to you know, have therapy from you? Tell everyone.

Sure. So, okay, so to make it easy, um, you can just go to the website. It's inspireamind.net. So it's I-N-S-P-I-R-E-A mind, M-I-N-D. Can I spell? Um, dot net. Okay. And on there you can reach me through, um, there's a little contact sheet, or you can reach me through email. Which is long, it's InspireMind.net, um, @protonmail.com. And the reason for that is it's, it's an encrypted email, so meaning it's just very safe to send it that way, it's HIPAA compliant. And then the phone number to reach me is on there also, but it's 716— and I have to look down at it because I don't call myself— it's 716-791-7812. 4-8. I should remember that. Um, so, but anyway, it's all by appointment. I'm very, very flexible, and, um, I serve individuals, and I do parent groups, and, um, also student groups, transition to everything from like middle school through graduate school and after. So, and, and that's all on there, but I just love what I do, and And it's so important to me to be able to do this with people. So I absolutely love it.

Well, I can tell that you love it and that you're so good at it. And I know from proof, from talking to me and my children, you know, my children have had struggles and have also talked to Marcy and she's phenomenal. So I can't recommend her enough. So please don't hesitate to reach out to her. And Marcy, I can't thank you enough for doing this with me today. I love you so much.

I can't thank you enough. Inviting me, and you are wonderful, and I love you, and just, just being a part of this, I really appreciate.

Thank you so much. This is Rebecca Green reminding everyone to spend every day laughing, learning, and loving.

Thank you for tuning in to the Winey Palooza podcast. If you like what you heard, please be sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode. While you are there, leave a review. I love to hear your feedback. Thank you so much for listening. Until next time.

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