A short relationship-advice talk arguing that unmet expectations and the "law of familiarity" erode romantic relationships. The speaker emphasizes that relationships should be about giving rather than getting and warns against transactional expectations when partners are sometimes low.
What messes relationship up is just a couple things. Jot them down if you would. The number one thing that messes up is expectations. When you first get in a relationship, you fall in love with somebody, you want to do everything you can. Your whole life is about lighting them up. And when they're lit up, you feel so good inside. But then what happens? Over time, people tend to hit something. Jot down the law of familiarity. The law of familiarity simply says this. If you get around anything enough, get around anything enough, sooner or later you take a little bit further. Granted, you don't mean to, it's just human nature. And then what starts happening is you have expectations, well, you should do this or I should do that. And it becomes transactional. You're noticing what you're not getting versus in the beginning of the relationship, it was all about you giving and your giving made you feel good. A relationship jot down is a place to go give. It's not a place to go get. If you're going to relationship to get, you're almost always going to be disappointed because there may be times when your partner is in a low state. You can't expect your partner is going to be where you want to be all the time.
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